Remember me?
by FlorLola
Summary: Everything comes to an end. She just never thought it'd be like this... Can love really conquer all? Survive it all? What if it's not there anymore? Sequel to Fiery Tales
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: **Guess what? I'm still broke, and all Sailor Moon characters belong to the one and only, Naoko Takeuchi. I just own the idea for this fic. Please do not steal!

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><p><em>No te amo como si fueras rosa de sal, topacio<br>o flecha de claveles que propagan el fuego:  
>te amo como se aman ciertas cosas oscuras,<br>secretamente, entre la sombra y el alma._

_Te amo como la planta que no florece y lleva  
>dentro de sí, escondida, la luz de aquellas flores,<br>y gracias a tu amor vive oscuro en mi cuerpo  
>el apretado aroma que ascendió de la tierra.<em>

_Te amo sin saber cómo, ni cuándo, ni dónde.  
>te amo directamente sin problemas ni orgullo:<br>así te amo porque no sé amar de otra manera,_

_sino de este modo en que no soy ni eres,  
>tan cerca que tu mano sobre mi pecho es mía,<br>tan cerca que se cierran tus ojos con mi sueño._

**.**

**Pablo Neruda - Sonnet XVII **_(from "Cien sonetos de amor")_

I do not love you as though you were the salt rose, topaz  
>or carnation arrow spreading fire:<br>I love you as certain dark things are loved,  
>in secret, between the shadow and the soul.<p>

I love you as the plant that does not flourish, and carries  
>hidden within itself the light of those flowers,<br>and, thanks to your love, it lives darkly in me  
>the quickening aroma that rose from the soil.<p>

I love you without knowing how or when or where,  
>I love you straightforwardly, without problem nor pride:<br>I love you thus because I do not know other way to love,

but like this, in which I am not nor you are,  
>so close that your hand on my chest is mine,<br>so close that your eyes drift close with my sleep.

.

.

.

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><p><strong>Prologue<strong>

Unaffected by the autumn wind making the black material of her blazer fly around her frame, she kept the single flower to her chest, protecting it, as she made her way into the empty stadium. No lights, no loud music, no sea of flashes as thousands of cameras went on. No prying eyes. No one, but the security guards, and maybe a janitor or two.

And him.

She knew he'd be there. Just like he always did.

Every year, when the calendar hit that one date, he would suddenly disappear. Silently, turning off his cellphone, seeking for a few hours of solitude. Just him, the open sky -unlike that one day-, and his memories, as the only way he had to pay his respects, for there was no grave for him to do so. And as she approached the lonely figure sitting in the middle of the field, just as she had expected, she knew, he preferred it that way. So it was more private. Personal.

Eight years.

Has it really been that long? It seemed like yesterday, when the beginning of the end had started, so suddenly. So abruptly. And so, so forlornly. And yet, at the same time, it felt as if it was ages ago.

She shook her head at that last thought, half amused. Time surely had its strange ways, sometimes eternal, others incredibly ephemeral...

She finally reached him, sitting there, on the exact same spot he had knelt on, all those years ago. Holding her, with crystal tears flooding down blue eyes, as she passed away. Turning into nothing, dissolving into thin air, leaving nothing behind but three broken, lost hearts, and a fading fragrant of olives ascending into the darkened sky.

It was funny, in a weird kind of way. She had barely known her, and yet she could still remember that scent. So vividly.

With one leg bent up, his elbow resting over his knee, and the other under him, he just sat there. Mindlessly playing with the grass with his free hand; long, jet black ponytail dancing in the wind, midnight blue eyes lost somewhere in front of him, and that same fragrant probably -certainly- lingering in his mind.

Not wanting to disturb him, she bent down, placing the single poinsettia she brought with her on the ground, and then sitting next to him. It was nothing like the magnificent, burning flowers he told her about. But the star shaped flower was the only one that somewhat resembled them, and she had read somewhere that, though usually related to Christmas and general cheerfulness, originally, it was considered a symbol of purity.

A pure star. She liked that. It was fitting, too. For that, the late Fireball Princess surely was.

A gentle touch upon her cheek made her turn to the side to look into midnight blues, and she smiled softly, lovingly tiling her head towards his touch.

"How did you find me?" he asked, curiously, in a low whisper, as if not wanting to break the tranquil moment.

"You always come here," she answered; her smile widening just a little when blue eyes blinked in surprise.

He frowned then, cutely and curiously, and she shook her shoulders, turning to look up front, letting her eyes take in the sight in front of her. It sure looked different from what she remembered. It seemed bigger, somehow. And quiet. Peaceful, with the sunlight pouring down like that, and the wind dancing around the green grass.

She had always known he came here every year. And every year, she silently respected his wishes, giving him a time alone. Just him, the open field that held so much meaning, and his memories. From that day, and from long before that.

She couldn't even begin to imagine what it felt like, to see her Princess die in her arms, being unable to do anything but watch. She didn't even want to think about it. And she actually admired him. All of them, really, for the way they had stood up. With no one else but each other to relay on, avenging their dead Princess, standing up against Galaxia and defending the Moon Princess, and ultimately, the entire planet. A planet that wasn't really theirs. And though they had made it their home, she knew, a part of them would always be years light away, on a now devastated planet, with the never dying memory of a beloved Princess. And now only the three of them were left of that lost world she had only heard of.

It was a silent agreement between the three of them, to leave each other alone on that one day -which, admittedly, was highly unusual.

Yaten would lock himself up on his apartment, or maybe go out around parks, botanical gardens and conservatories alike, Nikon in hand, finding flowers and leaves and small little details that would remind him of Her. Taiki, on the other hand, went to the observatory, probably looking through the telescope for hours, trying to find that one dying star he once called home.

And he came here. To the place he had seen her last.

She knew how much Kakyuu meant to them. To him. And she had always respected their one day long silent retreat. But on her way home she had seen that poinsettia -a rare thing, considering winter was yet to come-, and the rich red flower reminded her of equally red eyes. Again, a strange thing, considering she had only seen her a couple of times. But the vivid image of those red eyes came to her mind, and the compelling need to be with him, to be beside him on this particular day was just too strong to ignore it.

Yes, this was not his home planet. And, yes, his Princess had died. But he was not alone.

Earth was his home now. The Moon Princess had welcomed him with open arms, accepting him and his brothers in life and battle into her court, and, more importantly, into her circle of friends. A true, honest, deep friendship had flourished between the Lights and the Prince of Earth. They had built a new life, here on earth.

She turned back to look at him. A soft smile decorating her lips.

With this new life, something else came along. Unwanted, and even unwelcome at first, completely unexpected, a deep love has found its way between them. And the love they shared had grown within the years, getting stronger, unbreakable. And it was so real, so unique in its intensity and depth.

He was her everything, and she loved him, with everything she was. So, so much.

"I can't believe it's been eight years already," he said, taking her off her own thoughts, as she felt his hand gently taking hers; their fingers interlinking. "Some times I can still feel her," he said, looking up at the clear sky. "As if she was standing right next to me. I can hear her voice, and, for a moment, it's as if she was never gone. As if I've never lost her..." he trailed off. And then he chuckled, shaking his head and turning to look at her. "Weird, huh?"

She titled her head to a side, smiling softly. "Nothing is ever really lost, or can be lost," she recited, "no birth, no identity, form, no object of the world. Nor life, nor force, nor any visible thing; appearance must not foil, nor shifted sphere confuse thy brain."

He smiled at her words, frowning again, and she reached up her free hand, softly brushing her long fingers through his soft hair. "The body, sluggish, aged, cold, the embers left from earlier fires, the light in the eye grown dim, shall duly flame again," she continued, in a hushed, husky whisper.

"I like that," he murmured, looking into her eyes.

"It's Walt Whitman," she offered.

"Carpe Diem?"

"One and the same," she said, nodding her head. "Though that's a different poem," she then added, chuckling again.

"You're starting to sound like Taiki," he teased, as it was now his turn to chuckle when she hit him with her elbow.

He shook his head, amused, as his eyes went back to the open field in front of them. His hand still gently cupping hers; his thumb softly caressing her wrist. The deep red flower got his attention, and his smile turned softer, as he looked at her again.

"Thank you," he whispered, in a low, gentle murmur. "For being here with me," he added, guiding their linked hands to his chest, right over his heart, as he leaned in closer, lovingly rubbing their noses together. "What did I ever do to deserve you?"

She smiled at that. "You got lucky," she teased, shaking one shoulder.

He returned the smile, squeezing her hand. "I know I did," he agreed, in a low, loving tone.

She couldn't help it. A light blush came to her cheeks at his words. And though she had long ago given up on trying to stop the red from coming to her cheeks whenever he did or say stuff like that, it was kind of surprising. Even after all this time, he was still able not only of surprising her, but also of making her blush like a school girl. And he didn't even try to, either. It just came naturally; small little things here and there, sometimes completely out of the blue, yet with so much honesty and so much love shinning in those midnight blue orbs.

He kissed the back of her hand, lovingly, before standing up. "Let's go home," he said, offering a hand to her.

She smiled up to him, accepting the offered hand and standing up. Not letting his hand go, interlinking their fingers again, she cupped his cheek with her free hand in a silent, loving gesture of comfort, before meeting the distance between their faces and kissing him, softly and deeply.

"Let's go," she agreed after breaking the kiss, in a husky whisper.

.-.

He finished cleaning his teeth and rinsed his mouth out, pressing the towel over his face and then lazily rearranging his ponytail as he stepped out of the bathroom and into the room.

It has been a long day. Wearying and draining, even. It always was. Every year. And though it has got easier over the passing years, as he made his way to the bed and saw her there, he knew, in the past four years, she has been the one making things better.

She made everything better. Just being around her made him feel more alive than ever before in his life, even when they weren't doing anything but just sitting over the couch in silence, simply holding one another.

She made him a better man. And right now, she looked so beautiful, with her back resting against the headboard and pillows. One long leg up and over the covers, a lazy hand twisting the short blonde locks at the back of her neck as she held a book with the other, wearing nothing but the deep blue shirt of his pajama. Or what it used to be...

He couldn't remember a time when she had actually bought a pajama for herself. Instead, she just slept on tank tops, switching to the shirts from his pajamas when nights got colder. He never used the shirts, anyway, and she insisted, why get herself a nightie or something like that, and let a perfectly decent pajama shirt go to waste? Though he had the distinct suspicion she was just too lazy to actually get into a store to buy herself a pajama, and it was easier to just steal his.

Crawling his way up to her, he rested his head on her chest; her round, full breasts offering a comfy pillow, as he encircled his arm around her thin waist. A smile coming to his lips when she was fast to pass an arm around his shoulder, her hand going to play with his ponytail, but her eyes never left the book she still held in her other hand.

"I can't believe you're reading that again," he commented, chuckling lightly, not needing to read the cover to recognize the well thumbed, worn out little book. But still, he raised a hand up, confirming his suspicions as he read the title.

Jonathan Livingstone Seagull.

She slapped his hand away with the book. "I like it," she said, nonchalantly.

"Kinda noticed," he joked. "Why?" he then asked, tilting his head up and looking at her. "Because of the self improvement fable, or the being free and flying around part?"

She smiled cheekily at that. "Both," she answered, proudly.

He chuckled again. "Figures," he joked again.

She rolled her eyes at him, lightly slapping his head with said book and then sticking her tongue out.

"Careful," he warned. "If you're not gonna do anything with that tongue of yours, I suggest you keep it inside your mouth," he said, in a serious tone that, he knew, the mischievous light in his eyes completely betrayed.

Two blonde eyebrows went up at that. "Oh really?" she asked, in a superior, unaffected tone. "What are you gonna do about it if I don't?" she asked, sticking her tongue out to him yet again.

He smiled, resting his head over her breasts again. "I'm gonna have to teach you a lesson," he said, as his fingers went to the shirt, unbuttoning it.

She laughed at that, finally leaving the book over the night table and re-accommodating herself over the pillows. With both her arms now resting under her head, she looked down at him, trying to put on a shocked face, arching an eyebrow, but unable to fight the smile off her face.

"Is that so?" she asked, playfully. "Is Space Boy going to punish me now?"

He chuckled both at the teasing question and at the old, endearing nickname. "And for calling me that, now I'm gonna have to torture you," he said, somehow managing to keep his voice steady and serious as he sneaked a hand inside her sleeping shirt, cupping her breast.

A satisfied smile coming to his lips when her skin trembled under his touch, yet she stubbornly kept herself from showing any reaction.

"Oh my," she said, in a tone that could be classified as mocking.

But he knew better. He knew _her_. And he definitively knew that mischievous, playful light dancing in those green orbs right now.

"What am I gonna do?" she asked, frowning in a faked, worried manner. "How can I possibly redeem myself now?"

He chuckled, arching an eyebrow. "You really want me to answer that?" he asked back, as he flickered the small, hardened nipple with his thumb.

She gasped softly, biting on her lower lip as a sided, playful smile came to her lips. "Maybe," she answered, as one long leg found its way around his waist. "Or maybe is best for you to just..." she trailed off, as one soft hand made its way to his chest, down his stomach, "show me," she finished, as her hand reached its destination, and he felt long, soft fingers caressing him.

_(edited! to read, go to blog: florlolasfics dot blogspot dot com dot ar)_

Shaking in the aftermath, with their breaths and heartbeats completely uncontrolled, he collapsed on top of her, nuzzling his face against her neck and smiling when he felt her tenderly caressing his nape.

He turned to lay on his back, and she followed him, resting her head over his chest and curling next to him. And he smiled again, passing an arm around her shoulders, keeping her close, as his other hand went to lazily but gently caress the soft, long arm now resting over his stomach.

He felt her rather than heard her letting out a soft, tired sigh, and he smiled, kissing the top of her head. "I love you, Haruka," he whispered, in a low, tired tone, as sleep was starting to take him over.

She nuzzled her cheek against his chest; her hand over his stomach going all the way to hug him as she now practically laid on top of him. Her long, naked body curled up against him.

"I love you too," was the sleepy, husky whisper that reached him before he finally closed his eyes, soon falling asleep, with her in his arms.

.

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><p><strong>A.N.<strong>

Ok folks! This is it! The promised sequel!

It's gonna be long (I think...), and sad, and heartbreaking (or at least I hope so!), so if you are the kind that get emotionally and teary, you may wanna get yourself a few klennex boxes...

If you didn't read "Fiery Tales" then you may not understand over half of this story. Like the fact that, yes, I killed Kakyuu (I'm a bitch, I know). And I will be making references to a lot of details here and there, so... you can always ask if you don't understand/remember something, but because I am such a mean bitch, I can't promise I will answer any guessing... don't wanna ruin the story for ya!

Rated M for a reason... though I'm re-reading this and taking all the explicit scenes out (which will be published in my blog) the general content of this story is still, in my opinion, rated M, for there are suggestions all through the story. So, you've been warned!

Anyway! You know the deal already! So let me know what you think!


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **All SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please do not steal!

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><p>Monday on the line, when you know<br>that now's the time to leave and be free.  
>Aware of your destiny.<br>When that moment arrives,  
>wild visions through the mind.<br>And all I see, is what used to be.  
>My life could soon be a memory.<p>

I don't ever wanna feel pain.  
>Wanna be ready when you call my name.<br>I don't ever wanna feel fear.  
>'Cause every night feels alright,<br>when you're near.

Battle through this war of nerves,  
>when your life takes a turn.<br>What I have is what I feel,  
>while in my mind, you're laying here.<br>Feel that unholy dread,  
>there's a piece of me in all he says.<br>All kinds of weird stuff inside my head.  
>The stage fright in my own bed.<p>

I don't ever wanna feel pain.  
>Wanna be ready when you call my name.<br>I don't ever wanna feel fear.  
>'Cause every night feels alright,<br>when you're near.

Don't wanna be like a voice without word,  
>'cause I need you here with me.<br>Don't wanna be alone in this world.  
>Will I suppress my fear?<br>And will I beat this war of nerves?

.

**(War of nerves - All Saints)**  
><em>.<em>

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><p><strong>1<strong>

She took his hand in hers, careful not to move the needle and hurt him. Tears came to her eyes upon noticing how cold his hand was.

His hands were never cold...

There was a bandage over the left side of his head, and the bruise on his temple was finally starting to fade away. His left leg was on a plaster, and yet another ugly looking bruise over his ribs. The needle in the back of his hand was connected to the serum bag to keep him hydrated, while the machines all around the bed monitored his heartbeat, breathing, and brain activity.

Blinking her tears away, she reached out her other hand, gently caressing his jet black hair. It was dull, she noted, and she knew he would probably want to take a shower and clean up the moment he woke up.

But he wasn't waking up...

She had known something was wrong.

After the last Grand Prix of the season in Singapore, and after a rather intimate celebration in the privacy of her hotel room, he had jumped into a plane the morning after; the last details of his new album had to be taken care of so he could meet the scheduled release date. And she still had a few press conferences to take part of, and then helping her crew packing everything up before going home.

After getting everything done, and the anxiety of being back home in just a few more hours getting the better of her, she had called him, only to get no answer at all.

There were several reasons to explain that. He could be home, taking a shower, and of course he would be unable to even hear to the phone. He could have gone to the grocery store and forgot his cellphone. Or he could still be at the studio, maybe working on some song or another and making the final arrangements, and either couldn't pick up her call, or forgot the small device somewhere in there.

Wouldn't be the first time.

But something in her guts had told her that was not it. Something was wrong, and she had known it in her heart. In her soul. And barely forty minutes later, after countless of tries to reach him both back home and at his cellphone, when Yaten's number flashed in her own cellphone, she knew.

A distracted driver. A red light, and a little kid crossing the street. And him, running to the little kid and shielding him from the upcoming, inevitable impact.

A broken leg. It was a miracle his ribs were not broken as well. The open wound in his head was not that deep, and doctors had been able to stop the internal bleeding. But he had hit his head, hard against the pavement. Scans and tests didn't show any severe trauma, but they wouldn't be sure until he woke up.

And he wasn't waking up...

"Hey," a male voice got her out of her own head, and she straightened up, turning to look at the door and giving the tall brunette a tired, half felt smile.

"Hey," she greeted back, rubbing her eyes with one hand. Her smile widening a little when he offered one of the cardboard cups he was carrying.

"If the tea's as bad as the coffee," he started to say, "then I'm sorry."

She chuckled, nodding her head. "It is," she said, accepting the cup all the same and taking a small sip. A frown coming to her features as she drank the warm liquid.

It really was terrible. But at least it helped her keep herself warm.

She saw him walking up to the head of the bed, right beside her; purple, somewhat sad eyes looking down on the sleeping man before letting out a sigh and turning to look at her again. "You should go home," he said, in a worried, yet tender tone. "Take a nice, long shower and a good night rest."

"I'm fine," she assured him, shaking her head.

"Haruka."

She looked up at him again. A tired, sad expression all over her face she was unable to hide. She just didn't have the strength to hide anymore. But she couldn't go home. Not with him still in here...

Two weeks. He had been sleeping for almost two weeks now.

She took a deep breath, trying to keep the tears she felt coming to her eyes again from falling. She was so sensitive lately... it was a wonder she hadn't cried herself to death yet.

"I can't," she finally said, lowering her gaze, looking at the cold, unmoving hand resting over the bed instead. She took it in hers again, softly caressing his skin with her thumb. "I just... I can't..."

"You need to take care of yourself," he said, putting a gentle hand over her shoulder. And then he chuckled. "You know he'd kill me if anything happens to you."

Despite herself, she chuckled too at his comment. "I'm fine, Taiki," she insisted, lightly squeezing the hand over her shoulder. "Really, I am."

He let out a sigh, obviously giving up arguing with her. "At least have some decent meal," he said, almost pleading. "Not bland hospital food, but a real meal. I can ask Makoto to..."

"No, it's ok," she was fast to say, shaking her head. "I don't wanna bother her."

"You won't," he said, smiling knowingly. "You know that."

"I know," she agreed, shaking her shoulder. "But really, there's no need. Setsuna's coming by later, and I'm sure she'll bring something with her."

"Promise me you'll eat something."

She glared at him. "Have you ever _tried _to say no to her?" she asked, frowning, in a light, half felt joking tone.

"No," he admitted. "I don't have the guts to do so."

She chuckled at his honest answer. The olive skinned woman could be kind of scary whenever she got all bossy. And the only time she would take no as an answer, was when she was expecting that answer in the first place.

"You're smart," she noted, chuckling lightly again.

"So people say," he joked, shrinking his shoulders, but smiling down to her all the same.

They went quiet for a moment then, just sitting by the bed and drinking from their beverages. A sound from the hallways could be heard every now and then, along with the muffled hustle and bustle of fans and media alike, camping outside the hospital. But the room was quiet, sunken in silence, with only the sound of the machines monitoring the black haired man laying on the bed filling the seemingly empty space. The cables and the serum and bruises adding a certain surreal feeling to it, as if she was trapped in some weird, terrible dream, and she just couldn't wake up.

And it was so weird, seeing him so still. He didn't even look like he normally did when he was asleep.

And that scared her.

Shaking her head, she forced herself off that line of thoughts before she could really go there, taking another sip from the awful tea.

"Did you go to a doctor?" Taiki suddenly asked, making her look up at him.

She frowned, slightly tilting her head to a side. "No..."

"You should," he said, in a rather serious tone.

"I know," she agreed, letting out a sigh and massaging her temples again. "And I will, just... not right now..."

"The sooner, the better," he commented, not wanting to push the matter too much, probably not wanting to lecture her. At least not right now. He surely would, later on.

"I know, I know," she said, vaguely nodding her head. "And I promise I'll let you know as soon as I..."

"Hey, guys," came a third voice, and they both turned to look at the short silvery haired man entering the bedroom. "Any news?"

They didn't really need to answer his question. The moment his lime green eyes landed on the still quiet, still sleeping black haired man, with the machines and the serum still connected to him, he was perfectly able to guess the answer himself.

Letting out a sigh, he walked up to the bed, standing right next to her. "He's always had his lazy ass moments, but this is getting ridiculous," he joked, shaking his head, as he stole the cardboard cup off her hands, taking a sip. But then he frowned, chocking. "Shit, this is terrible!" he complained, retching.

"Yes, it is," she agreed, laughing at him.

"What _is _this, anyway?" he asked, eying the cup before returning it to her.

"Theoretically, tea," she answered.

He frowned. "And in reality?"

"Do you really _want _to know?" Taiki asked back, frowning too.

Lime green eyes blinked then, before he shook his head, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Probably not," he said, admittedly. "Some things are better left unknown, right?"

"Unsaid," Taiki corrected him, almost automatically.

"Huh?" Yaten asked, blinking and frowning again.

"Some things are better left _unsaid_," the brunette said, slightly nodding his head as he did so. "That's how that saying goes."

"I know," the shorter man defended himself. "But how can something be said at all, if it is unknown in the first place?" he reasoned.

"As stupid as it sounds," Taiki said, putting his hand up to his chin in a thoughtful manner, "you may have a point, there."

"Excuse me?" Yaten asked, offended.

And she just laughed at them and at their stupid, yet always amusing antics. "You guys are terrible."

.-.

He could hear them. They were... somewhere near.

He couldn't quite catch what they were saying, but he recognized their voices. And he could recognize their auras, too.

And she was there again as well. He couldn't quite recognize her, or place a face to that voice. But she was someone he knew.

Someone important.

He was lost and alone, with nothing but darkness around him. But whenever he heard her voice, soft, low, husky... it made him feel better, for some reason. The sadness in her voice made him sad too, and that short, yet rich laugh made him feel so good, almost safe. At home.

He wanted to hear her laugh again.

Her aura was strong, too. Even when he was unable to hear her, he could still feel her presence. And she was so alluring, too. As if she was calling out to him, somehow. And he knew, she was not just a normal girl. But she was not like him, either, though something in her aura, in her energy, felt oddly familiar...

So, who was she? Why was she there?

Where _was _there? And why couldn't he get out?

.-.

"Aw, but you love us, anyway!" Yaten joked, as he tapped the black haired man's plastered leg. "Now we just need this guy to wake up and say something stupid of his own, and we can all have a good laugh."

That sad look came back into green eyes, and the blonde woman reached out her hand, gently running her fingers through black hair, and Taiki glared at him.

"Sorry," Yaten apologized, his voice barely a whisper. "I just..."

"It's ok," she interrupted him, whispering too. Her fingers now caressing the somewhat warm cheek. "I want him to wake up too..."

.-.

She was so close now...

Why was she so sad? He couldn't see her, and he didn't know her, but for some reason, he knew she was crying. Her soul was crying. And she was just so, so sad...

He wanted to reach out to her and hold her. Comfort her, and kiss her tears away. Her sadness was breaking his heart, and he couldn't take it anymore. But as hard as he tried, he was just unable to reach her.

She was nothing but a distant voice and a strong, warm presence in the darkness that surrounded him.

_Seiya, wake up._

"_Princess?_"

.-.

"Have you eaten anything?" Yaten asked, completely and deliberately changing the subject.

Green eyes glared up the tall, brunette man, and he blinked, raising both his hands up in the air. "I swear I didn't say anything."

"That's a no," Yaten noted in a rather disapproving tone, frowning.

"I'm fine."

"Sure you are," the short man said, rolling his lime green eyes. "That's why you have huge bags under your eyes and you look like shit."

"Gee, thanks," she said, unconsciously rubbing her face with one hand.

"And, please don't tell me you've lost weight," Yaten continued, now in a more serious, still disapproving, worried tone.

"I'm fine!" she insisted, raising her hands up in the air in a rather exasperated manner as she rested her back against the chair again. "You guys don't need to worry about me so much. I know how to take care of myself."

"We know that," Taiki said, putting a gentle hand over her shoulder. "But you're family now, remember?"

"When did I sign that contract?" she asked, half jokingly.

"When you started dating him," Yaten answered her, pointing at the sleeping black haired man with his head.

"I'm _fine_. Seriously," she insisted, yet again. "I'll eat something later, ok? I promise," she assured them. "And, trust me, I haven't lost any weight, so stop worrying so much already."

Taking a look at his wristwatch, Taiki let out a sigh, knowing it was just a matter of minutes before a nurse would come rushing in and politely but surely kicked them out. Visiting hours were almost over, but he could still stay on the waiting room for Setsuna to come and make sure the dark green haired woman would force some decent, full meal down the blonde's throat...

.-.

Why were they arguing? Why were they suddenly so worried? Was there something wrong with her?

_Seiya, wake up._

There she was again!

"_Princess?_" he called out to her. "_Princess, where are you?_"

_I'm here. I'm always right here._

"_Where?_" he asked, almost desperately. "_I can't see you... I can't see anything!_"

_Just because you cannot see me, doesn't mean I'm not with you._

He heard that strange, husky, alluring voice again. Torn between trying to reach out to her again, and staying where he was and try to find his Princess instead, he hesitated, feeling now even more lost than before.

_Go_.

"_Where?_" he asked again, frustrated now. "_Where am I?_"

_Somewhere you're not supposed to be._

"_What?_" he asked, honestly confused, and completely lost. Somewhere deep inside him, knowing that if he left this place -wherever it was-, he would not see his Princess again.

A sudden light appeared somewhat far away from him, but bright enough to hurt him after being in the darkness for so long. He thought he saw shadows, moving within the light, and he could feel them getting closer. Their voices getting louder now.

And his Princess' presence getting weaker.

"_Kakyuu!_" he called out to her, desperately.

_I'll always be with you._

"_What? No!_" he exclaimed, as a deep, almost unbearable sense of loss invaded him at her words.

The light started getting stronger then. His mind was spinning, his head hurt. He felt heavy and stiff; he could literally feel the heavy beat of his heart as the light kept on getting stronger and stronger. Closer, brighter, it was really hurting his eyes, and a sudden awareness of his entire body aching took over him.

_Go to her. Wake up._

"_Princess!_"

_You need to wake up now._

"_Princess!_"

.-.

"Just make sure you get some rest tonight, alright?" Yaten said to her, a worried frown upon his soft, handsome face.

A low, tired groan escaped the tall blonde as she lifted her legs up, hugging them and hiding her face in between her knees.

"Hey, I'm talking to you," he complained, when she didn't give him a real answer.

"Yes, dad," she finally answered him, now looking up into lime green eyes. A mocking look all over her tired face. "I promise I'll be a good girl."

The short man rolled his eyes at her, flickering his ponytail off his shoulder. "You don't have to be such a bi..."

A low, almost heavy groan coming from the bed got their attention then, interrupting Yaten and making them all turn to look on that direction just in time to see midnight blue eyes blinking up. A frown, eyes closing again, and then another groan.

"Seiya?" she called out to him, practically jumping off the chair and going to the side of the bed again.

"What?" came the rusty, kind of annoyed question. He tried to sit up, only to get dizzy the moment he lifted his head off the pillows, and he groaned again.

"Take it easy," the tall brunette said, gently guiding him down again. "You've been out for a while..."

"What happened?" he asked, closing his eyes again and frowning.

"There was an accident," she answered him. "You're at the hospital now," she added, going to take his hand in hers.

But the way he opened his eyes and looked at her stopped her in mid air.

"And what are _you _doing here, Tenoh?"

.

.

* * *

><p><strong>Coming soon: <strong>"That's right, I'm playing nanny tonight"


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **All SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please do not steal!

.

* * *

><p>We would always find a way<br>to give it a different tone  
>to every night, every day.<br>There was always something exciting  
>for the two of us.<p>

We would always find the time  
>to hold the fantasy.<br>Start the countdown and take off  
>away from the planet of routine.<p>

But one bad day, suddenly, the sun went pale.  
>In front of the mirror we noticed, something changed.<br>The magic of that great love vanished away,  
>and in our faces there was no joy anymore.<p>

But suddenly, silence extended its hands  
>to cover our souls and quiet our voices.<br>Like an oil lamp, little by little, our joy's burning flame  
>went out.<p>

The love left, without leaving any trace.  
>And it was impossible to rescue it,<br>because we never found it again.  
>It went away the same way it came.<br>Without notice.  
>The love left...<p>

and we couldn't rescue it...

.

**(Se fue el amor - Emanuel Ortega)**  
>.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>2<strong>

Green eyes blinked in confusion.

"What?" she asked, as a sinking feeling took over her heart, squashing it.

"Why are you here?" he asked again, now narrowing his eyes as he looked up at her. "What? Wanting to make sure I stay away from Odango?" he asked, with a half mocking, all the way acid tone to his still rusty voice.

"What the hell are you talking about?" came Yaten's question, as the shorter man looked at Seiya, frowning, and seemingly lost. "She's..."

A strong hand on his chest stopped him, both from finishing whatever he was just about to say, and from getting near the black haired man and glaring down on him. And he blinked, looking at the blonde as if she had grown a second head.

But she looked into purple eyes instead, and with barely a nod from the head, she took a step back and away from the bed. Mindlessly brushing her hands against her jean pants, and hesitating just for a moment.

"I uh... I'll go find the doctor," she announced, stepping out of the room.

.-.

"He's awake?" came Usagi's excited voice, as the petite blonde walked into the waiting room carrying a colorful bouquet of gypsophilias, gerberas and lilies in one hand, putting the other to her chest and trying to catch her breath, probably after running all the way from her house to the hospital. "How is he? Can we see him?"

"Breathe," Setsuna instructed, gently rubbing the blonde's back.

The tall, olive skinned woman had arrived just as the doctor went into Seiya's room to examine him, and was now standing right next to the tall blonde woman, offering her silent, but eternally welcomed company as they waited.

Yaten was standing right across the small room, with his back resting against the wall. Eyes closed and hands in his pockets, he looked both tired and worried.

Taiki was sitting in one of the chairs. Elbows resting over his knees, his hands supporting his head, he seemed to be deep in thought. Or maybe just about to fall asleep. They were all incredibly tired, after all.

"Oh, I'm fine!" Usagi assured, shaking her hand and turning to look into green eyes. "So? How is he?"

"Doctor is checking on him," Haruka provided, shoving her hands into her pockets. "How did you know..."

Usagi smiled at that, shrinking her shoulders. "Mamoru," she answered, almost sheepishly. "He works here, remember?"

"Right. Sorry," the tall racer mumbled.

"It's ok, you have a lot in your mind," the petite blonde said, in understanding.

"You have _no _idea..." Yaten mumbled, in a low, tired whisper.

Baby blue eyes blinked at that, and she frowned. "What you mean? Are you ok?" she asked, now looking up at the tall blonde. "Are you sick or something?"

"I'm fine, Koneko," she assured her, throwing a warning look towards the short man, before gently smiling down to her Princess. "Just tired, that's all."

"You should eat something," Setsuna murmured, sending a somewhat scolding look towards the racer.

"Sweet Lord!" she sighed out, rolling her eyes and massaging her temples.

They were all making her feel like a three year old!

But before she could say anything to assure them yet again that, yes she was tired, but no, she was not hungry or sick or in need of being taken care of, the tall, middle aged doctor they have come to know in the past two weeks walked into the waiting room. Politely nodding his head to the newly arrived, he went to Taiki, now standing up, as both Haruka and Yaten got closer. With the chart in his hands, resting them in front of him, he looked at them all before finally speaking up.

"As you already know, his wounds are healing nicely," he informed. "We need to keep the cast on for another two weeks, and keep him here under observation for a few days, but I'm confident he'll fully recover."

"What about his head?" Taiki asked, frowning. "Any brain damage? He seemed kind of... lost... back there..." he finished, trailing off worriedly.

"Yes, about that," the doctor said, rearranging his glasses over his nose and frowning for a moment. "He seems to be suffering a post traumatic amnesia. It's really not that strange after these kind of accidents with the resulted head injury."

"How bad is it?" Yaten asked, frowning too.

"Well, he's able to state basic information, as who he is, full name, and where he's from," the doctor answered, as he looked into green eyes. "But I'm afraid he seems to be unable to recall any memory from the past eight years or so..."

"Eight years?" Yaten repeated, incredulously.

"So, in his mind, he's sixteen again?" Taiki asked, easily doing the math in his mind and blinking in surprise.

"Basically, yes, I'm afraid so," the doctor confirmed, nodding his head.

"Is it... is it permanent?" Haruka asked, in a low, kind of trembling voice.

"There is no severe, permanent damage," he answered her, frowning again. "Like I said, it's a post traumatic symptom, caused by his injury, the concussion and following loss of consciousness. I can't say I wasn't expecting it at some minor degree, but I have to admit, I am surprised at his memory loss being this significant... was there any major, stressful or traumatic event during that period?"

"Guess you could say that..." Yaten trailed off, exchanging glances with Taiki.

"That might explain it," the doctor continued. "Some studies say the brain goes back to before a certain traumatic event, like resetting itself. Others think it's completely random..."

"But, is it permanent?" the tall blonde asked again.

"He shows signs of quite a fast, perfect recovery, so I'm being positive, here," doctor answered her. "His full memory may come back tomorrow, in a couple of weeks or maybe a few months..."

"A few months?" Haruka repeated, frowning now. How was that being positive?

"Or he may never get his full memory back," Taiki finished for him, frowning as well.

"Like I said," the doctor said, offering a reassuring smile, "I'm staying positive here. But, meanwhile, is best not to overwhelm him with information and facts... give him some time to readjust himself."

"Yes, of course," Taiki said, slightly nodding his head. "Thank you for everything," he finally said, shaking hands with the doctor.

"You think you could... keep this _off _the medical report to the media?" Haruka was fast to ask, before the doctor could turn around and leave. She knew reporters were still camping outside, and she figured, the last thing they needed right now was all that craziness and a never ending stream of questions coming their way.

Or, more specifically, Seiya's way.

"As you wish," he said, nodding his agreement. "I'm not a fan of talking in front of the cameras, anyway."

He shook hands with Yaten and Haruka, and after a few more polite nods of the head, the doctor finally turned around and left the waiting room. And she stood there for a moment, blinking, before finally letting out a sigh, taking a seat in one of the chairs. Her hands going through her hair.

"Damn," was all she could murmur.

"That's... not good," Usagi said, frowning worriedly, as both her and Setsuna had heard everything the doctor just said to them.

"Guess I will be taking a good night rest tonight, after all," the tall blonde said, straightening herself up and resting against the back of the chair. Head titled up and staring at the ceiling. "You guys should probably go in there and tell him about Kakyuu," she then said, looking at them, silently asking for forgiveness for making them bring such sorrowful news in the first place. "Otherwise he's gonna want to get out of here as soon as possible to start looking for her..."

"Yes... we should probably fill him in..." Taiki agreed, in a rather mournful tone.

"Wait, '_you guys_'?" Yaten repeated, blinking and frowning at her. "You're not gonna go in there?"

"You've heard the doctor," she answered him. "He thinks it's eight years ago."

"So?" he asked back, shaking his shoulder. "We go in there and explain everything..."

"No," the blonde said, interrupting him and shaking her head.

"What do you mean, _no_?" the short man asked, both confused and kind of exasperated now.

"Do you really want to throw that one to him right now?" she reasoned.

"But, you _are _his girlfriend," Usagi pointed out, frowning cutely.

"I know that," she said, letting out a sigh. "But he doesn't. And there's a lot he has to deal with already," she reasoned. "So no one tells him anything about... me," she finished, in a low yet resolute voice.

"So you're just gonna lie to him," Taiki concluded, in a half accusing, half understanding tone.

"Haruka..." Setsuna called out to her, sitting right next to the tall blonde and putting a hand on her shoulder. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," she was fast to answer. "It's what's best for him right now."

And it was.

In her mind, it was the only reasonable way to go right now. Because she knew he'd be going through a lot. As if being in a hospital for who knew how many more days under observation and with a broken leg was not bad enough already for the singer's antsy tendencies, this memory loss only made things worse.

Eight years. That meant several, different things.

For one, in his mind, they were still searching for the fireball Princess, and the war against Galaxia was still going on. And she knew, finding out his Princess was dead would devastate him.

And then they had to put him up to date with all the little facts that were probably on sixteen year old Seiya's mind. Like school and shows and any other extracurricular activity he had taken part of in his teen years and his way through high school. The Three Lights were no more, but he was still in the business. And though she figured his manager wouldn't actually want him to continue working on his new album right away or expect him to give a show any time soon -and if he did, she would definitively give him a piece of her mind...-, his career alone was a lot to catch up on.

And last but by no mean least, eight years ago they pretty much hated each other. As far as he knew, she was nothing but Usagi's overprotective, stubborn, distant, lesbian friend who was in a serious relationship with Michiru, and who wanted nothing more than to kick him out of the planet.

And she couldn't exactly blame him for that, because indeed, eight years ago, she had wanted to kick him out of the planet. Or at least to make absolutely sure he kept his distance from her Princess.

She let out a sigh, massaging her temples. Basically, it all went down to two things. He hated her, and he was highly attracted, completely infatuated with the Moon Princess. And though she knew she couldn't exactly held whatever he had felt in the past against him, fully aware that she herself had been in love with someone else back then, that little piece of realization hurt.

A lot.

"You'll have to tell him eventually," Taiki pointed out, frowning down on her.

Though something in the way he looked at her right now told the blonde racer he had not only agreed to keep his silence, but he also understood.

"I know," she admitted, letting out another tired sigh. "Just... not right now."

"We should probably keep him off the tv and the internet, then," Yaten said, obviously not completely fine with the decision, but still accepting it all the same.

"We'll figure things out as we go," Taiki offered. "Let's see how he is in the morning, and... we'll see."

Silence fell among them then, as they all took it all in. Only Usagi's heels softly clicking over the floor could be heard, as the petite blonde walked up to the tall brunette man, handing him the bouquet she still held in her hands.

"Can you give this to him?" she asked, almost shyly.

Purple eyes blinked at her then, as a frown came upon Taiki's handsome features.

And Usagi smiled, shrinking her shoulders. "I don't think I should go and give these to him..."

Again, Taiki just blinked at her, before they all turned to look at the tall blonde woman.

"Why not?" she asked, frowning. Though she understood what she meant. "You brought them."

"Yeah, but... well... you know..." the Moon Princess mumbled, blushing in embarrassment. "This is awkward," she finally stated, looking into tired, sad green eyes in an apologetic manner.

"Yeah..." the racer agreed, in a low murmur, not really knowing what else to say. Taking a deep breath, she stood up from her chair. "You should probably go check on him," she said, looking at both Taiki and Yaten. "He must be fidgeting by now."

Taiki chuckled at that, nodding his head. "You're probably right," he agreed, putting a hand on Yaten's shoulder. But before taking a step at all, he looked straight into green eyes. "Go home. Get some rest," he said, in a rather commanding, yet gentle tone.

"I'll take her home," Setsuna offered, wrapping one arm around Haruka's and then smiling up to her when the blonde simply blinked at her. "That's right, I'm playing nanny tonight and I'm making you dinner."

She rolled her eyes at the remark, before looking back at the tall brunette man. "See?" she asked, pointing at her olive skinned friend with her head. "Don't worry, dad, mom's gonna take good care of me," she said, mockingly.

"Mom happens to know you," Setsuna said, sending her a scolding glare. "And I know you'll just crawl into bed with an empty stomach the second you get home."

"You're good," Yaten said, noticing the annoyed look upon the blonde's face, though she didn't really said anything to argue the tall, dark green haired woman.

"I know," the guardian of Time agreed, smiling proudly. "Someone has to keep her in line, right?"

"I'm not a child!" the racer complained, rolling her eyes yet again.

"Could've fooled me," Setsuna retorted. "And no salad for you either, Missy," she added, pulling from the blonde's arm and making her start walking along with her towards the exit door. "It's too cold for just salad."

As Setsuna dragged her out of the room, she turned her face around to look at the three people still standing there. A half mocking, half panicking, all the way annoyed expression over her face. "Someone just kill me now."

_._

* * *

><p><strong>Coming soon:<strong>

"Didn't they tell you? You and I are good friends now"

"I'm friends with an Outer"

"Oh, yeah"


	4. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me. Please do not steal.

.

* * *

><p>Something has left my life, and I don't were it went to.<p>

Somebody caused me strife, and it's not what I was seeking.  
>Didn't you see me? Didn't you hear me?<br>Didn't you see me standing there?  
>Why did you turn out the lights?<br>Didn't you know that I was sleeping?

Say a pray for me, help me to feel the strength I did.  
>My identity, has it been taken? Is my heart breaking on me?<br>All my plans fell through my hands, they fell through my hands.  
>Empty, all my dreams, it suddenly seems, it suddenly seems<br>empty

.

**(Empty- The Cranberries)**  
>.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>3<strong>

Moving his hair aside, he inspected the stitched up wound. It still looked reddish, though obviously healing, and if after two weeks it looked like that, he could only imagine what it must have looked like when he first arrived to the hospital.

It wasn't exactly small, but it wasn't huge either. And he wondered how four little stitches could cause so much trouble.

Eight years...

They told him he had just lost eight years of his life because of a post traumatic amnesia. And he just couldn't believe it. He still felt the same, he looked the same, and the whole amnesia thing seemed like something taken out of a movie or something. Or maybe just a really bad joke. But he highly doubted Taiki, of all people, would take part on such a joke. And as annoying and kind of fussy as Yaten could get at times, he really didn't think he would ever come up with such a mean, heartless joke either.

Kakyuu was dead.

They had failed. Miserably and greatly.

Opening the faucet, he splashed fresh water to his face, before looking at his own image again.

Their princess was dead, their home planet was dead as well. Galaxia had been long defeated, and they have been living on earth for over four years now. School was over with -that was actually kind of a relief-, and with Kakyuu dead, there really was no reason for the Three Lights to still be around. Though he was still in the music business. A big shot singer, or so they told him.

What else was different?

He frowned, inspecting the image the mirror gave back to him, and the magnificent, burning phoenix decorating his shoulder.

Oh, right. That was new, too. Though he did remember toying with the idea of getting something like that, so it wasn't completely unexpected. The tattoo over his bellybutton, on the other hand, was.

There was another one over his shoulder blade, and though he couldn't really see it properly, he could recognize Kinmoku's ancient language and the ever burning flowers. It looked nice, at least from what he could see in that small mirror hanging on the bathroom wall of his hospital room. And if he was completely honest with himself, he could actually picture himself getting something like that. A tribute, forever marking his skin the way She had forever marked his heart and soul.

He had dreamed of Her last night.

It was all a confusing blur, but he knew he had dreamed of Her. He remembered calling out to her, and feeling her presence around, hearing her voice. He couldn't really tell if it was just his confused, fragmented mind bringing her back to life in his dreams, or if maybe it was a lost memory. And, what frustrated him even more, he couldn't remember actually seeing her, or anything of what she had said.

He chuckled then, lightly shaking his head. Well, that seemed to be quite a problem of his lately; being unable to remember things. Like the past eight freaking years of his life.

So here he was now. A grown up, twenty four year old singer from another galaxy, living on earth. Go figure.

At least he was still good friends with the girls, according to what Yaten had said about them surely coming by to pay him a visit today. And he was glad about that one; some dear old, familiar faces wouldn't hurt. Though he wondered if they looked any different...

He surely didn't. Not that much, anyway. Except maybe for the tattoos.

And the bruises, of course. But as he eyed the already fading bruise over his side, he figured, now that he was awake and slowly getting his strength back, it wouldn't take that long for his fast healing process to fully kick in, making that cast on his left leg to be gone. It was definitely annoying, and so was the stitched up wound on his head. And it has been particularly hard to convince the nurse to let him take a shower by himself.

But there was just no way he would let some strange woman give him a bath. It was just too embarrassing, humiliating even, and he was not a baby. But after assuring her he would properly wrapped the cast so it wouldn't get wet, promising to be particularly careful when washing his head, the nice old lady had finally gave in and agreed to let him take the much needed shower by his own means.

While Yaten was busy doing whatever it was he had to be doing -something about having to run some errands before coming by later in the afternoon-, and Taiki was talking to the doctors, taking care of some bureaucratic hospital papers or something like that, he took advantage of being alone for the first time since he woke up on that hospital. The nice, hot water felt great, relaxing his body and mind, granting him a few minutes of peace of mind after being bombarded with information, facts, and news that he just hadn't quite digested yet.

How could he? It was devastating...

And if that was not enough to put him on edge already, some nurse had came into his room that morning, with a big, happy smile on her face while carrying terrible food that was supposed to stand as his breakfast, talking nonstop about how much she liked his music and then promptly asking for an autograph. Usually, his fans weren't much of a bother to him. But he was on a hospital, all bruised up and pretty much having the worst day of his life -as far as he could remember, anyway-, and all lady nurse could think of was an autograph?

He shook his head, taking the clean pajamas, thanking Taiki for bringing them so that he wouldn't have to wear those ridiculous hospital robes.

He couldn't really blame the nurse for being that ridiculously cheerful -even at such unholy hour of the morning-; she probably didn't know. Both Taiki and Yaten had said something about keeping his memory loss as secret as possible, and only their small group of friends and his doctors were aware of that little fact. Which was probably a good thing; he really didn't want to be the center of the entire media's attention, telling oh such sad stories about him.

But then again, if he was such a well known singer now, they probably already had, with him being hospitalized and all. But why feed the craziness? And, he figured, as much as things may have changed in the eight years he couldn't remember, Taiki was still the smart, centered one. Chances of that ever changing were slim to none.

Fighting with the cast, he put on the deep blue, cotton pajama pants. Careful not to hurt his somewhat sore ribs, he put on an undershirt before putting on the shirt that matched the pants. He usually slept with just his pants, or underwear when the weather allowed him to, but a cold was probably the last thing he needed right now.

He tided his now -finally- cleaned hair in his trademark low ponytail and stepped out of the small private bathroom and into his equally private hospital room. There was a colorful 'get well soon' bouquet resting on a table, along with a bottle of water, the remote control of a tv he was not in the mood to turn on, and a small, half empty clutch bag with his razor and a few other personal items.

Exactly how he had left it before going to take his shower. But what wasn't there before was the girl now sitting on a chair next to said table.

She was reading a book of some sort, and he knew she couldn't be older than seventeen. Eighteen, maybe. Not because he was an expert on ages, but because the clothes she was wearing told him so; black plaid pleated miniskirt, a white long sleeved shirt with a small red tie, black thigh high socks on her crossed legs, and mid-calf low heel boots on her feet. The black coat and red scarf resting on the chair behind her completed her high school uniform, along with the black suitcase resting on the floor.

She had straight, jet black hair that reached all the way to her shoulders; her bangs falling over her forehead and covering her eyes, until she raised her face to look up to him, and he noted her startling, dark purple eyes.

"Hi!" she greeted him, smiling warmly and gently.

It was an honest, true smile. Filled with kindness. And he found he liked that. Her soft voice and that kind expression all over her features felt somewhat familiar, but he couldn't quite place a name to that youthful face in front of him now.

"Hi..." he greeted back, frowning.

She titled her head to a side; her hair brushing against her shoulder as she did so, and her smile never leaving her features, but turning into a half amused, half understanding one. "You don't have the sightless idea of who I am, do you?"

"No," he admitted, scratching the back of his head as he made the rest of his way to the bed. "Sorry."

"It's ok," she said, waving her hand and closing her book, as she uncrossed her legs and stood up. "I was just a kid eight years ago, so I can't really blame you..." she said, shaking her shoulders a little and giggling softly as she got on her knees over the floor; big, purple eyes looking up at him now. "Is this better?" she joked.

He blinked at the kneeling girl, and she giggled again, standing up and gently tapping her knees to clean her socks, before getting closer to him and extending her hand out to him. That sweet, kind smile coming back to her features.

"Hi, I'm Hotaru," she introduced herself.

"Hotaru?" he repeated, accepting her hand and shaking it, now really confused.

Sure, eight years was more than enough time for the little girl to grow up. But, why was she here? First Tenoh last night, now her. What was next? Michiru swinging by and playing a serenade for him?

"Yup," she said, nodding her head, folding her hands behind her back and rolling on the ball of her heels a little. "Didn't they tell you?" she then asked, still smiling gently at him. "You and I are good friends now."

"I'm friends with an Outer," he said, in a questioning tone.

She giggled softly at that. "Oh, yeah," she said, slightly rolling her eyes, definitively amused now, as if she was laughing to some joke he didn't really catch -at all-, before shaking her head and that genuine, joyful smile came back to her lips. "Now hurry, before it gets cold!" she then said, tapping the bed for him to rest on as she made her way to the door.

Frowning and following her slim figure around with his eyes, he sat down on the bed, mindlessly moving the covers aside. His frown deepening when she popped her head out into the hallway, looking one side and then other, before getting back in and closing the door. A satisfied, happy smile playing on her lips.

"Cost is clear!" she announced, hurriedly making her way back to the chair and taking her suitcase. Walking up to the bed, and then pushing the overbed table so that it was right in front of him.

"Before what gets cold?" he asked, honestly confused.

Purple eyes looked at him then; a mischievous light shining in them, as a cheeky smile came to her lips. "What kind of friend would I be, if I let you starve to death?" she asked. "Or worse, having to put up with terrible hospital food? Not a good one, right?"

Despite his frown, he still chuckled at her, curiously studying her movements as she placed the suitcase over the bed.

"And you're the one always saying there's no fun in _cold _melted cheddar..." she continued, shaking her shoulder and then smiling up to him again. "And you're totally right on that one, so," she added, as she finally opened up her case, taking out a paper bag, "viola!"

He blinked, once, before a smile came to his lips at the brown paper bag with a few greasy spots and a logo he could recognize anywhere she just presented to him. And if the logo was not enough, the delicious smell coming out of it surely did the trick.

She took a white package out- just the right size to host a heavenly treat in there-, placing it over the table, right in front of him. "Double cheese, extra onions, full burger for you," she said, as she took another package out along with a soda can, "with fries."

He chuckled, slightly shaking his head, both amused and amazed, as his stomach reacted to the enchanting smell and he reached for the burger, opening up the package and doing a small, quick inspection.

"I specifically asked for extra, extra mustard," Hotaru said, obviously guessing what he was looking for, as she took out a smaller burger pack that, he guessed, was for herself.

A happy, satisfied smile came to his lips when, indeed, he noticed the generous amount of mustard over his deliciously looking burger. "I like you," he announced, unbelievably grateful for the girl's thoughtful gesture.

"I know you do," she said, waving her hand and taking a small bite from her own burger. "You always say that," she added, jokingly. But then she frowned. "Of course, you usually say it whenever I'm completely humiliating you on Call of Duty," she said, eying him and arching an eyebrow, "so I'm not so sure you're one hundred percent honest, there..."

He raised his eyebrows at that, honestly surprised. "Video console games?" he asked, intrigued.

"Play Station," she answered, nodding her head. "Three," she added, smiling widely.

He returned the smile at that, taking a big bite out of his burger and looking at her. "We should definitely have a date the second I get out of here," he stated firmly, after a moment of silence. "You, me, and that console."

"You got it," she agreed, again nodding her head, before taking another small bite from her burger. "Just try not to beg for mercy and use old, lame tricks on me so that I would let you win."

He laughed at that, and she glared at him. Though a small, amused giggled escaped her.

"That's just me appreciating a good challenge," he said, highly amused over having to justify himself about something he didn't even remember doing in the first place.

She frowned at that, turning to look up at the ceiling in a thoughtful manner. "No," she disagreed, shaking her head and looking back into his blue eyes. "I'm pretty sure that's you trying to trick me into going easy on you."

"I would never," he said, putting a hand over his chest as a faked, hurtful expression took over his face.

"You totally would," Hotaru argued, sending him a scolding glare. "You do know that classifies as _cheating_, right?" she asked, with a half accusing, half teasing tone to her soft voice.

He laughed again at her remark.

He could tell by her easy going attitude and her cheeky smile that they were, in fact, good friends. And it surprised him to find himself actually liking her, despite her being an Outer. Though he knew she was more than able to turn her entire attitude around and be just as demanding, set minded and cold as her comrades. But right now, with her school uniform and eating her burger as she laughed along with him, she was just a girl, genuinely enjoying some time with her friend.

"It's called distracting your enemy," he said, in a teasing, superior tone.

"It's called cheating," she insisted, correcting him. "Papa's _so _right about you," she then added, shaking her head.

The second the words left her mouth, purple eyes went wide opened, and she looked like a deer caught in the lights for a moment. And he frowned, shifting uncomfortable over the sheets.

"What do you mean?" he asked, fully aware of who she was referring to. "What does she say about me?" he inquired further, not really sure he actually wanted to hear the answer. Not that it was that hard to guess, anyway...

She shrunk her shoulders then. "Just that you'd do whatever it takes to get what you want," Hotaru answered in a low, almost apologetic tone. "If you really, really want it," she then added, switching back to her normal, sweet tone.

He tilted his head to a side, wondering for a moment. That wasn't exactly a bad thing per say; there was nothing wrong with being a persevering person. But somehow, coming from Tenoh, he knew she didn't exactly see it as a compliment.

"And that includes cheating, right?" he asked, somewhat annoyed. Though he did try to keep it from pouring it into the young girl.

"When it comes to Call of Duty, yes," she stated, nodding her head. "Oh, and when playing basketball, too," she then added, matter of factly, as it was her turn to send him an annoyed look of her own when he chuckled.

"What? No," he said, frowning, but still smiling innocently at her. "I never cheat in sports."

"Oh, I'm sorry," she said, teasingly, "but picking people up and dragging them all over the court just to keep them from scoring against your team is cheating in my book."

He laughed again, both at her little tail -that definitely sounded as something he would do just for the fun of it when playing with friends- and at her cutely, though faked, annoyed face. "Then your book is wrong," he joked, playfully winking at her.

"No, it's not!" she argued, pushing his arm in complaint, and then just laughing along with him.

Yes, he definitely liked her. Her melodious laughter was contagious, and she was fun to hang around. She could easily catch his jokes and even play along with him, and Seiya guessed she was able to see through his goofiness and just take it for what it was, without getting embarrassed, or worst, annoyed -unlike some other people he knew...

She finished up her burger, cleaning her hands with a napkin and smiling up to him. "So, how are you?" she asked, softly.

He let out a sigh at that, running a hand through his head. "I'm... tired," he finally answered, chuckling lightly. "Believe it or not."

She giggled at his last comment, slightly shaking her shoulders. "Oversleeping so much can cause that," she noted, teasing lightly. "And, ironically enough, you just need to rest now."

Chuckling at her cutely frowning face, he nodded his head. "Yeah... rest, take things easy and go slow..." he counted, remembering what the doctor had said to him the night before, after he woke up. "I'm gonna be bored to death for a while."

"It's for your own good," she offered. "So you can regain your strength and all."

"Yeah, I know," he agreed, making a small ball out of the now empty box of his burger and putting it back into the paper bag. "But knowing it doesn't make it any less boring."

"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll have a bunch of people waltzing in every day to keep you company."

Something in the way she said that made him frown, following her movements with his eyes as she stood up, taking the paper bag with the remains of their quick yet fully satisfying lunch.

"You won't be coming back?" he asked.

She stopped cleaning up the table to look up at him. "I don't wanna bother you," she answered, almost shyly shrinking her shoulders.

"You said we're friends, right?" he pointed out, smiling warmly to her. "You seem pretty nice, and I like having friends around."

"I can come by tomorrow after school," she offered, smiling again.

"Great," he agreed, nodding his head. "You think you could bring me something to read? A book, a magazine... just... _something_."

She seemed to think about it for a moment before finally nodding her head. "I'll see what I can do about that."

"Thank you," he said, satisfied.

But before Hotaru could say anything else, his bedroom door opened up, and in walked Taiki, carrying a coffee cup in one hand and his jacket in the other. He stopped on his tracks for a moment, frowning curiously, almost surprised at the black haired teenager, before a warm smile came to his lips.

"Hi!" she greeted him, waving her hand.

"'Taru," he greeted back, nodding his head. "Didn't know you were coming by today."

"My biology teacher didn't show up, so I got out of school early," she explained; her sweet, soft smile never leaving her young features.

Taiki frowned at that, placing his coffee cup on the table and throwing his jacket over a chair, to then turn around and look at them, crossing his arms over his chest. "I see... so why does it smell like a McDonald's in here?"

Seiya chuckled, and big, purple eyes looked up at the tall brunette man. "I don't know what you mean," she said, innocently battling her eyelashes at him.

"Sure you don't," Taiki said, obviously not falling for her act.

The interaction between the two told the black haired man they were obviously used to each other. Maybe the little girl he used to know had now became good friends with all of them; she surely seemed nice, and cute enough to win everyone's heart with just her soft giggles and her big, shining eyes.

"How are you?" the brunette asked, changing the subject and walking up to the bed, looking down on him with a gentle, genuinely concerned look upon his face.

"Great!" he answered, smiling widely. "When do I get out of here?" he then asked, anxiously. "I have a date with her and a PlayStation, and I would love to set a day for it," he said, pointing at the teenage girl.

Taiki chuckled, bemusedly shaking his head, shoving his hands into his pockets as he turned to look at Hotaru. "I see you've already got him into that thing."

"It's tradition!" she defended herself, shaking one shoulder. "Just because he decided to forget all about us, which, by the way, totally offended here," she said, looking into his deep blue eyes for a moment as she said that, before turning back to look at the tall man, "doesn't mean I can let him break every single tradition just like that."

"Tradition, huh?" Seiya repeated, amused by the girl's defensive little speech.

Yet something in the way she said that, implying it was not just the two of them, made him wonder. He knew there was just no way Taiki would ever play anything even remotely like that, but Yaten probably would, if he was bored enough and there was nothing else for him to do. He wondered how this tradition of them was, wishing he could remember hanging out; no worries, no concerns, just a bunch of friends having a good time.

Even with the three of them, the room felt suddenly empty, and he became very aware of the empty hole in his own head where memories should be. Not for the first time, he wondered what else was new.

What else was different?

An inexplicable sense of nostalgia invaded him then. A loss. A silent, hidden sorrow, deep inside. Something was missing, he could feel it. He just didn't know what; he couldn't quite put his finger on it. And as he vaguely listened to the conversation going on around him, he wondered, how could he miss what he couldn't remember?

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><p><strong>Next on Remember me?:<strong> "You know, we can always try hitting his head real hard. I figured, one hit took his memory away, maybe another one would bring it back"


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi, but this story belongs to me. If you like it, review, but please do not steal.

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><p>Everything changes, and everything ends.<br>And changing oneself is not bad.  
>But it's hard, because there's a life. And it's not just my life.<p>

If I could see you and turn back time, I'd tell you,  
>what we had was and will be for life.<p>

Let me try again to tell you the things  
>I couldn't say. To say I'm still the same.<br>Let me cry again for your leaving,  
>and for not knowing if I'm doing the right thing...<p>

I know you suffered for a long time,  
>and you didn't understand what happened.<br>When one loses the sentiment. When one loses sanity...

If I could see you and turn back time, I'd tell you,  
>what we had was and will be for life.<p>

Let me try again to tell you the things  
>I couldn't say. To say I'm still the same.<br>Let me cry for your leaving,  
>and for not knowing if I'm doing the right thing...<p>

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**(Todo cambia y todo se termina- Diego Torres)**  
>.<p>

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><p><strong>4<strong>

She opened the drawer, taking out socks and underwear and then making her way to the bed, putting the items into the suitcase. There weren't that much clothes for her to take, and she was grateful for that. But the seemingly simple task was probing to be harder than she thought.

Seiya was being released from the hospital in two days, and they had to get everything done before that in order to offer him a stable, tranquil place for him to stay in, with no traces of her ever being around.

Setsuna, Michiru and Yaten were there to help her around, though she guessed the guardian of Time and the violinist were there more to offer some sort of moral support rather than to actually help. And though she hated being treated like a crystal doll, as everyone kept on walking and talking and moving with excessive caution around her ever since he had woken up with a complete blank memory for the past eight years -and even before that, too, when he was still laying unconscious on that hospital bed-, she did appreciate the thought. She knew they meant well, and were only trying to make things easier for her, helping in whichever way they could find, and offering their unconditional friendship and support.

Even if they didn't exactly agree one hundred percent with her plan.

She shook her head, trying to clear her mind and keep focused on the task at hand. Shoes. Where were those shoes? She was sure she had left them somewhere in here...

She found a white shoe box right behind the small pile of neatly folded sweaters on the superior shelf, and she reached out for it, quickly opening it up and taking a peek to its contents to make sure it was the box she was looking for. But it wasn't. Instead of the black crepe satin, four inches heel stiletto shoes with red sole she was looking for, she found what it seemed to be a box of souvenirs.

A small, sided smile came to her lips then, easily picturing him keeping something like this, as she took a small, black match box, recognizing both the golden, single silhouette of a woman printed in there, and the phone number right under it. And though there was no real valid reason for him to ever take a match box, she knew he had probably taken it from the counter while paying the check. Surely, to add to this box of souvenirs and memories.

That had to go. She couldn't leave it in there and risk him finding it. First off, because she could only imagine what could happen if he did find it, and not knowing what it was or where it would lead him, he decided to just call that phone number.

And then, of course, there was the very real possibility of him showing this to either Yaten or Taiki, asking them if they knew where he got it from or what that place was. That would certainly lead to a series of questions she had managed to keep from coming long ago, seeking for answers neither she or Seiya had never really given in the first place. And she couldn't exactly let them find out now. Specially not with Seiya not even remembering that one story at all, and with him probably -surely- wanting to know as well. Only imagining how she could ever possibly explain that one to him made her blush, shaking her head and safely putting the small match box into her back pocket.

A small pack of photos in there got her attention, and she frowned, taking them out and inspecting them. There was one of Rei, wearing her old high school uniform as she sat on that arcade they still went to. One hand up, moving one long, raven lock of hair off her shoulder, as she laughed at something. Judging by both the angle, and the unsuspected posture and attitude in the Miko girl, she knew the photograph had been taking without her knowing.

She frowned curiously at that realization, turning the picture around only to find a small caption in there. '_Practical and ambitious, though loyal. Really hot temper'_, that handwriting she recognized immediately said. And then under it, obviously written later on judging by the slight change of color in the writing, another small, more direct and obvious, simple caption read _'Sailor Mars'_.

It was pretty much the same to all the other pictures. Candid shots of all the Senshi, with different, small captions, probably describing the first impression one teenage singer had had when first meeting them.

'_Dreamer, optimistic, cheerful and resilient_' was written right next to Sailor Venus, on the back of a picture of Minako cutely blushing at something and trying to hide herself on her school desk. '_Strong but sweet. Sporty. Awesome cook!_', for Sailor Jupiter on a picture of Makoto sitting on the grass, obviously talking animatedly while enjoy her lunch. And then '_Sweet, quiet, and ridiculously smart_' for Mercury, and she had to laugh at that one, as her green eyes landed on a candid of Ami, wearing her reading glasses, with her face pretty much stuck into a thick book.

A picture of Usagi in her old uniform, resting against a railing as she looked up at the open sky came next. She looked sad, and remembering exactly what was going on back then, it wasn't hard for her to guess why her Princess looked so down on that picture. '_Pretty, sweet, cheerful. Kinda lazy but really, really cute_' was written on the back, and unlike with all the others, under her Senshi name there was a second, small but to the point caption. The word '_taken_', with a strong, angry underline, judging by the force the word has been added, was also there.

A sad smile came to her lips at that.

This was young, teenage Seiya. Of course he would write something like that about the Moon Rabbit. And completely ignoring that nagging little feeling inside her chest, she had to admit, the guy would probably have a really hard time figuring that one out all over again, along with facing the fact that Usagi was not only on a serious, rock hard stable relationship with someone else, but she was also engaged.

She shook her head, going back to the pack of candids. A picture of Setsuna, quietly sitting on the doorsteps of the Hikawa Shrine came next. Curious as to what teenage Seiya first thought about her olive skinned friend, she flipped the picture around, reading the caption there.

And she laughed.

Nothing but a big questioning mark, and then a simple '_Sailor Pluto. Figures_', added later on.

Well, that certainly described Setsuna quite well. The woman was, half the time, nothing but a big questioning mark, what with her knowing all, mysterious smiles and her ever observant magenta eyes. It took time and getting to know her better to see the other side of her, for she could be just as fun and laid back as any of them. Kind of bossy at times, but with a heart the size of Russia, getting all motherly on all of them -including the Lights _and _the Prince-, the dark green haired woman was a loyal, warm, affectionate, unconditional yet highly mysterious -in a completely annoying kind of way-, amazing friend.

She chuckled lightly, putting the picture back on the pack and getting to the next one. It was a candid of Michiru playing the violin. Probably rehearsing, judging by the simple white skirt and light blue tank top she was sporting.

'_Polite and calm. Very intriguing. Hides something_' was written in fast, hurried letters, right over an angry looking, underlined '_She's Neptune_' conclusion. Seiya himself had told her once how he had known back then there was something about Michiru that separated her from any other young women; a special energy, particularly present whenever she played her violin, that had first led him into her dressing room that one time, all those years ago.

Of course Seiya hadn't known her that well at all back then, so he had have no way of knowing the aquamarine siren had felt something peculiar in all three of them as well. Her charming, teasing attitude was a wild card to the violinist; one men usually fell for, right away. And of course she had openly used it against him. But the guy was smart, and not falling for her charms, he had played his own cards as well.

And then she had walked in on that dressing room. And finding him in there had been reason enough for her to want to punch the daylights out of him. Finding out that he was an outsider, an intruder, with a rather obvious romantic interest in her Princess only adding to her deep, true, passionate dislike towards him.

And the feeling had been reciprocal. Which was why, considering his mind was set back to that specific period of time, she hesitated when coming up with the next picture.

Biting on her lower lip, she contemplated her younger self, wearing a simple white tee and a jean vest on top of it, loosen jean pants over her legs, as she rested on the hood of her own car. Probably -surely- keeping a watchful eye on her Princess and the intruders. But she gave in to curiosity, flipping the photograph around.

'_Overprotective. Standoffish. Bossy. Cold. Aggressive_' was written right over a second caption that read '_Freaking Uranus_', clearly stating the well known, unfriendly, unflattering mutual feeling they have had towards each other in the past.

But what made her smile was the fact that there were two more captions in there, both written with different pens, obviously added in different times. The word cold was scratched, while bossy and aggressive were underlined. An arrow coming from that underline pointed to the first added caption in there; '_Definitively. But also naughty, teasing, and captivating. Surprisingly shy and breathtaking. Looks beautiful when she blushes._'

As if on cue, a blush came rushing to her cheeks upon reading that, as a small, tender smile came to her lips at the last little message written there.

'_Can't breathe without her._'

Simple, to the point. And so utterly heart touching.

But also wrong. A soft gasp escaped her and her vision became blur as the thought crossed her mind.

In the past five days, he had proved himself wrong on that one.

"Damn," she cursed, in a low whisper, as she blinked her tears away, taking a deep breath.

The last picture on the stack was one of little eight year old Hotaru, wearing a cute, pale pink skirt and a cream colored sweater over a frilly neck white shirt, as she stood in what she guessed was the backyard of the Shrine, with her small little hands fold in front of her, rolling on the back of her black Mary Jane shoes. Her smile came back at the cute picture of her daughter and a soft chuckle escaped her when she turned it around and read the caption there.

'_So cute. Smartest little girl ever._'

Yes, that was her little Firefly, alright. No arguing about that one.

"I think it's safe to assume he won't be needing these," came Michiru's voice, as she walked out of the bathroom carrying a shampoo bottle and a few other personal cleaning products, as she shoved a box of tampons in the tall blonde's direction.

She chuckled at that, shaking her head. No, he surely wouldn't be needing those at all...

"And this _might _raise suspicion," the violinist added in a teasing tone, now showing her a pink, disposable razor.

"Probably," she agreed, nodding her head.

"Are you ok?" Michiru was fast to ask, easily reading the somewhat sad look upon her eyes.

"Yeah," she answered, shaking her head and completely dismissing the subject at all. But then she smiled again, handing Hotaru's picture to the violinist. "Look what I found."

A soft smile came to Michiru's features as she took the picture, contemplating Hotaru's cute face expression, and overall cuteness. "Ah... the good old times," she murmured, in a rather nostalgic tone.

And she frowned, slightly but mockingly wrinkling her nose at the comment. "You sound as if you were a ninety eight year old lady or something."

"Do I?" Michiru asked back, frowning for a moment, before smiling again. "Well, sometimes I do feel like a ninety eight year old lady. Don't you?"

"Ah, no," she answered, both mockingly and questioningly.

"Shut up," the aquamarine haired woman retorted, playfully shoving the photograph to the blonde's nose.

Noticing the pack of pictures, she frowned curiously, taking it off Haruka's hands and looking through the pictures. A sad, sympathetic smile coming to her lips when she read the message on the back of Usagi's picture, and then frowning when she came to Haruka's.

"Are you sure about this?" she asked, for the hundredth time that day alone, looking into green eyes.

"Yes."

She let out a sigh, flicking one curly aquamarine lock off her shoulder. "Then we should probably take this, too," she said, as she held Haruka's candid shot in her hand. "All of these. Taking only one would be too obvious."

"I know," she agreed, sighing out and massaging her temples. "Just put them in there," she instructed, pointing at the open suitcase.

"You guys done in here?" came Yaten's voice, as the silvery haired man walked into the room, carrying a pile of old magazines in his hand. "Why on earth would you keep so much crap in here, is completely beyond me," he then added, throwing the magazines over the bed.

A few old issues of Motor Trend and Road & Track, along with a People's magazine with the very first full interview they had ever given to the media as a couple.

Yes, she should definitively take those with her. Along with a well known woman's magazine she couldn't remember why it was there in the first place, until she flipped through the pages and came upon an ad for a famous jeans brand.

Right... she had forgotten about that one.

"We don't," she said, putting the pile of magazines into the suitcase as well. "It just sort of... piled up."

"Whatever. All cleaned up," he announced, crossing his arms over his chest. "Ready when you are."

"Sure, um..." she trailed off, looking around for a moment, before finally closing the suitcase and pointing it to him. "Just take this to my car while I take one last look around to make sure I'm not forgetting anything."

"Yeah, ok," he agreed, nodding his head. But before taking the pointed suitcase, he looked at her, with a rather goofy, childish smile upon his face. "You know, we can always try hitting his head real hard," he proposed. "I figured, one hit took his memory away, maybe another one would bring it back."

Both Michiru and Haruka blinked at him, before the blonde finally laughed, despite herself.

"Only, you know, careful enough so we can avoid the concussion and falling into a comma part," he continued, innocently shoving his hands into his pockets.

"You should talk to someone about those disturbing thoughts with a clear violent underline you're having," came Setsuna's comment, as she walked into the bedroom as well, sending a scolding yet amused look to the short man.

"I'm just saying... could work," he said, shaking one shoulder and chuckling.

"Kitchen cleaned and fridge filled," the dark green haired woman said, completely ignoring Yaten's last comment. "I took the liberty of adding a few delivery phone numbers, in case he may need them."

"Sixteen year old, single Seiya?" Yaten asked, smiling yet again. "You bet he will."

"I know he kind of forgot all about it and has no clue whatsoever, but I still love the guy, you know?" Haruka complained, rolling her eyes. "And that basically means I'm still the only one allowed to make fun of him."

"But you'll be with him when he gets here, right?" Michiru asked, cutting out a pointless, stupid argument that she knew would arise between the tall blonde and the lime green eyed man before it could even start. "I don't think he should be left alone... I'm sure he's lost already as it is."

"Of course I'll be here," he assured them. "And I'll come as often as I can, too. But I do have a job, and I can't exactly move in with him, can I?"

"Please don't," Setsuna teased, putting a hand over Yaten's shoulder and gently tapping it. "We do want both of you alive, after all."

He frowned at her at that. But then he seemed to consider it for a moment, before finally smiling. "Guess you're right," he admitted, shaking his head, amused, going to the previously pointed suitcase and taking it off with him, as he made his way out of the bedroom and the apartment.

"What else do you need?" Setsuna asked, getting the blonde's attention once again.

She frowned, thinking for a moment and taking a look around. And when green eyes landed on the white souvenir box, she remembered what she had been looking for in the first place. "Shoes," she finally answered. "I can't find my shoes."

"What shoes?" Michiru asked, curiously.

"My Christian Louboutins," she answered, getting on her knees and searching under the bed.

"You have Christian Louboutin shoes?" Michiru repeated, obviously surprised, making the blonde looked up at her just in time to see her blinking.

"What's wrong with that?" Setsuna asked, kind of confused.

"Nothing," the violinist answered, raising both hands in the air in a defensive gesture, and then turning back to look at the tall blonde still kneeling on the floor. "But you should know, I really hate you right now," she announced, narrowing her blue eyes to the racer.

Haruka chuckled at that, standing up again. "No, you don't," she argued. "You're just jealous."

"Yes I am," Michiru agreed, not at all ashamed, and following the tall racer with her eyes as she made her way back to the closet, searching for the aforementioned pair of shoes. "How come you have Christian Louboutins and _I _don't?"

"That's probably one of the biggest mysteries in life," Setsuna provided, obviously amused. "Along with the eternal question of whether there's life in another planet or not, and, which came first, the egg or the chicken?"

"And then _you _are supposed to be the serious one," Michiru questioned, arching an eyebrow at their olive skinned woman.

"And _she _is supposed to be the hardcore tomboy, yet she owns Christian Louboutins and has a thing for lingerie," the guardian of Time retorted, eying the tall blonde when green eyes blinked at the last remark. "Just because I never said anything, don't think I've never noticed those lace cheeky panties and the embroidered bras."

Instead of answering, Haruka just shook her shoulders, smiling sheepishly. "There _is _life in other planets," she said, completely ignoring Setsuna's last comment. "The proof of that just walked out of here," she added, smugly, as she got on her tiptoes, searching the top shelf again. "Ha! Found them!"

"Still, I was expecting something a little bit more..." Michiru trailed of, waving her hand as she tried to come up with the right word, "philosophical... from you."

"Fine," Setsuna said, rolling her magenta eyes, as she took the few remaining bags resting over the bed. "If a tree falls in the middle of a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?"

"That's a cliché," the violinist argued, tilting her head to a side and half narrowing her eyes.

"You're just impossible to please, aren't you?" the olive skinned woman pointed out, shaking her head in a mockingly exasperated manner, to the turn back to look at the blonde now holding a pair of expensive shoes in her arms. "And, technically, the proof of life in another planets is still standing here," she said, pointing at the three of them.

"Past lives don't count," Haruka stated, shaking her head in disagreement.

One dark green eyebrow went up at that. "Says who?"

"Says I," she insisted, proudly. "And _unlike _the three musketeers, I was born and raised on this planet," she then added, turning back into the closet to take one last look around.

Her green eyes landed on a leather jacket hanging in there, and a small, sad smile came to her lips as she reached out her hand, gently grabbing the black material.

_Space Boy..._

"Whatever makes you happy, blondie," Setsuna teased.

"I know you like them, no matter _what _you say," Michiru said, giggling.

She chuckled at that. Yes, she did like them. Specially a certain black haired, deep blue eyed one...

"Ready to go?" the violinist asked, making her turned back around.

"Yeah," she said, letting out a sigh. "Just... give me a minute, ok?" she then asked, shaking her shoulder when both her friends sent a sympathetic, understanding look her way, before silently leaving the bedroom.

Turning back to the jacket she was still holding, she raised the sleeve to her nose, breathing in. It still had his scent on it; that mix between his perfume and his after shave lotion, and just... him.

Shaking herself the moment she felt her eyes watering again, she blinked several times, taking a deep breath and stepping backwards, away from the closet. Holding the shoe box to her chest as if it provided her some sort of shield against her own sudden swirl of emotions, she let her eyes wander around the room.

The bed has been made with new, clean sheets. The night tables, with only the lamps and the phone resting on them. No frames, no pictures.

Stepping out down the hallway and into the living room, she found the same scenario. The coffee table was clean, with only a few old -safe- magazines, a notebook, and a simple and impersonal base as the only decoration. Frames and pictures of them had been removed from walls and shelves, too, replaced with pictures of Seiya with just the guys.

Only one of those was a group picture, taken last summer while having a day out on the beach. Seiya and Yaten were pretty much sprawled over the sand, Minako and Makoto in all fours and half on top of them, just so that they could pose to the photo, while Rei looked really busy laughing her heart out at the ridiculous mass of arms and legs they all made and the goofy, silly smiles on their faces. Hotaru was in there too, but she was confident it was safe to leave it there, as the black haired teenager was sitting on her beach towel after obviously being disturbed by the quartet, looking at them with a half questioning, half amused look upon her face.

The guitar case was resting next to the window, where she knew Seiya had kept it for so long. That, when it was not just resting over the couch.

That reminded her, she needed to run a clean check on his laptop before handing it to either Yaten or Taiki.

She walked up to the door, taking her keys out of her pocket, and then turning around, taking one last look around. This place held so much meaning to her. The couch, the kitchen, the hallway. Every corner held so many memories... Memories that were no longer shared.

Letting out a sigh, she finally walked out of the apartment Seiya would be soon occupying. Alone. Like he used to, four years ago.

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><p><strong>A.N.:<strong> I don't know shit about fashion designers, but I figured Haruka wouldn't wear crappy shoes. And when I googled the kind of shoes I wanted, the Christian Louboutin was the only designer that came up, who is supposedly known for his red soled shoes. So, there! I'm trusting google and the internet on that one, 'cause there's no way in hell I'll ever spend that much money on shoes, no matter how much I like them!

**McFleet:** not that I don't want to answer you, but you seem to have disabled your pm's? So, can't really answer you, can I? Anyway, I totally love you. Did I ever tell you that? I do! Your reviews and funny pm's make my day, every time!

**petiyaka:** sorry! kind of in a roll here... guess I'm inspired :P but don't get use to it; I still have class, so I won't be able to keep up this updating rate for long...

**Coming soon:** "You are. You are my freaking problem"


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer:** SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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><p>Can you stop the fire? Can you stand to fight her?<br>You can't stop the fire. You won't say the words...  
>Please...<p>

Please, please forgive me,  
>but I won't be home again.<br>Maybe someday you'll look up,  
>and barely conscious, you'll say to no one,<br>'Isn't something missing?'

You won't cry for my absence, I know.  
>You forgot me long ago.<br>Am I that unimportant?  
>Am I so insignificant?<br>Isn't something missing?  
>Isn't someone missing me?<p>

Even though I'm the sacrifice,  
>you won't try for me, not now.<br>Though I'd die to know you love me,  
>I'm all alone.<br>Isn't someone missing me?

Please, please forgive me,  
>but I won't be home again.<br>I know what you did to yourself,  
>I breath deep and cry out,<br>'Isn't something missing?  
>Isn't someone missing me?'<p>

[...]

And if I bleed, I'll bleed,  
>knowing you don't care.<br>And if I sleep just to dream of you,  
>I wake without you there.<br>Isn't something missing?  
>Isn't something...<p>

Even though I'm the sacrifice,  
>you won't try for me, not now.<br>Though I'd die to know you love me,  
>I'm all alone.<br>Isn't someone missing me?

Can you stop the fire? Can you stand to fight her?  
>You can't stop the fire. You won't say the words...<br>Please...

**(Missing - Evanescense)**

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><p><strong>5<strong>

Checking the bathroom and making sure there were no personal items left, he walked back into the room. Leaving the jacket and a scarf neatly folded over the bed, he finally closed the small handbag, tapping his pocket and making sure he had his car keys before putting on his own jacket just as the doctor walked in into the bedroom, blinking surprised at the empty bed for just a moment. An amused but polite smile coming to his aging features when one ridiculously happy looking black haired man wheeled his way into the room soon after.

Seiya surely was having a blast fooling around in that wheel chair.

The moment a nurse came in to take him upstairs for one last x-ray of his leg to see how it was healing, and after a momentarily -though very short lived- refusal to sit on that chair, Seiya had soon found the apparently fun benefits of being motorized. Flying around in that thing all over the hallways, being his charming, funny self with nurses, doctors and patients alike.

"I hear that leg is coming along wonderfully," the doctor said, smiling at his patient.

"Yup!" Seiya answered, obviously all too happy about the prospect of getting the cast off his leg soon enough. "So when do I get out of here?" he asked, as he balanced the chair on its rear wheels and looked up at the doctor.

He looked good today.

Maybe it was the promise of finally being able to leave the hospital after a week of being pretty much locked up inside the same, boring bedroom, no matter how nicely perfumed and personalized it was, with all the flowers and cards the girls had brought with them throughout the week. Or maybe he had finally been able to have a good rest last night. He couldn't exactly be sure of that, since Yaten had been the one staying with him last night, but he highly doubted it.

Though he wasn't saying anything, Taiki knew Seiya was having trouble sleeping through the nights. He was always tired in the mornings, and would always toss and turn in his sleep, waking up in the middle of the night, unable to fall back asleep for hours.

Him being in a hospital might be a reason why he wasn't saying anything; a nurse or a doctor would surely give him something to help him sleep better, and Seiya has never been the friendly towards medication kind of guy. He would only take painkillers if he was in real, deep pain, and unless necessary, the black haired Light avoided any kind of medication at all.

Having bad dreams obviously didn't qualify as good enough reason to take medications in Seiya's book, so he could understand why he wasn't saying anything to the doctors and nurses. But the fact that he wasn't saying anything at all to anyone was worrisome.

He was all smiles and jokes when the girls were around, enjoying their company and their stories about day trips, holidays, hangouts -silly, funny anecdotes they all masterly cleaned out of certain details, like the presence of one specific tall blonde woman-, but Taiki knew him better. Not that Seiya didn't really enjoyed their company, but he knew, the moment he was left alone, silence took over him, as the black haired singer tried to put his own blank mind at ease.

The fact that he wasn't really asking that many questions about himself and what else had happened in the last eight years, never inquiring that deep unless someone actually told him something was proof of that. Seiya was still having a hard time digesting Kakyuu's death, and Taiki couldn't really blame him for that. It has been quite devastating to all three of them back then, and to Seiya in particular; he had always felt personally responsible for their Princess, and for all of them, and her passing had been a hard blow on his self assurance about his abilities as a Senshi.

And now he was surely facing all that, all over again. Taiki could only imagine what it would be like to wake up with a complete blank where memories from the past eight years should be, having to face their loss without fully knowing how it happened in the first place.

Seiya was having a hard time, and Taiki knew it. And he couldn't help but think that one specific blonde would help the singer. Having someone around who loved him as deeply as she did couldn't hurt, and he had read somewhere that being around familiar people and places could help in cases of post traumatic amnesia.

But there was just no way Taiki could make the blonde understand that. She made it a point on keeping her distance from him, giving him time to process everything and not standing on his way.

She came back to the hospital a couple of times after he woke up. But she didn't dare going in and actually seeing him; instead, she just settled with sitting on the waiting room, maybe talking to a doctor or two, watching him from the distance when he went to his physician, hearing his voice and laughter from the hallways whenever he had company.

She was torturing herself. And Seiya, too, by keeping him in the dark like this. But there was no way of making her change her mind, and Taiki knew it. She could be as stubborn as a mule, and she had raised the bar and taken the word obstinacy into a whole new level.

"Right now," the doctor said, smiling to his patient. "All we need is for you to sign the release papers, and you're good to go."

"You go sign those papers, I'll go get the car," Taiki informed, shaking hands with the doctor and then stepping out of the room, taking his jacket and scarf, and the handbag with Seiya's belongings.

"Perfect!" Seiya said, smiling cheekily. "Where are those papers?" he then asked, eagerly.

.-.

Shaking hands with the Director, she gave him a polite smile before finally turning around, walking up to the elevators and pressing the button. Brown paper file in hand.

As she stepped into the elevator and the doors closed in front of her, she rested her back against the wall, closing her eyes and letting out a tired sigh.

She hated playing the celebrity card like that, but it really was the only way she could find to ensure no word would get out and unleash a paparazzi madness all around them. There was a lot going on right now, and she surely didn't need reporters and journalist and photographers following her around, pitying her and getting their noses in their lives, publishing stories. So now she had a perfectly legal paper that promised exactly that; complete confidentiality, and no report to the media without previous consent.

This has definitively been the worst week of her life. Excruciatingly long, too. And she kept feeling as if she was having a nightmare, and she just couldn't wake up.

She was supposed to be enjoying this. The racing season was over, and she finally had enough free time to enjoy herself and do whatever she pleased. Spend time with him.

Yet, she couldn't.

Christmas was getting near, and she was so not looking forward to it. Not like this...

The elevator stopped and the doors opened, and she straightened herself up and opened her eyes, only to have her heart falling to the floor as deep, midnight blue eyes looked at her.

"Tenoh?" he asked, blinking at her in pure surprise as he walked into the elevator, struggling with the crutches. "What are _you _doing here?" he then asked, rolling his eyes and resting against a wall himself, and then placing the crutches in front of him, resting both hands on the pads.

A knot formed in her throat, and she had to take a deep breath, tilting her head up and trying to calm her suddenly heavy beating heart.

.-.

She royally ignored him. Not even nodding her head towards him, as she usually did, maybe even growling lowly or rolling her eyes.

She simply ignored him, standing there and looking up at the ceiling.

"Always such a nice lady," he commented, mockingly, after a moment of complete silence. "You really can't stand me, don't you?"

She frowned at that, turning to look at him. "I never said that," came the low, husky reply.

"You never said otherwise," he pointed out. "And you didn't answer my question, either."

She closed her eyes again, crossing her arms over her chest. "You shouldn't ask something if you don't really care for the answer."

_Touché_.

He wasn't expecting her to smile at him and act as if they were best friends. And, sure, he wasn't exactly dying to know what was her life like now a days. But he was trying to be civil, polite even, and her ignoring him like this bothered him.

He knew some things would surely never change, but were they still on hating terms towards each other? Even after all these years?

What the hell for?

Hotaru seemed to be pretty nice and opened towards him, so he knew it was no longer a general, shared feeling among the Outers. And for what everyone had let him know in the past few days, he's been living on earth for quite a few years now, so that meant he was no longer seen as a threat or an outsider.

Of course, he knew Tenoh had always particularly disliked him because of his feelings for the Odango. And, as much as he hated to admit it to himself, he was pretty sure he had never gotten anywhere with her. And if he did, then no one was ever going to tell him about it -f they even knew about it in the first place-, considering how she was engaged and soon to be married to her long term boyfriend -even if the guy had simply disappeared from the face of the earth when the Odango had needing him the most...

Tenoh ignoring him like that was completely ruining his good mood. He was finally being released and free to leave that boring, sterile room and go home. His very own apartment, so Taiki had told him, and was excited about having his own place to call home. But his excitement was going down the drain as the tall racer just stood there, eyes closed and hands crossed over her chest, and it pissed him off.

What the hell was her freaking problem?

Before he could stop himself, he heard his own voice asking exactly that.

And she chuckled, though it did sounded more like a chocked sigh or something, turning to face him. "You are," came the hard, husky voice; green eyes looking straight into his blue ones. "You are my freaking problem."

.-.

She regretted saying it the second the words left her mouth, though she couldn't help herself.

And although she knew he would never really understand the words the way she actually meant them, seeing some aggressive, mean, and most likely hateful meaning into her answer, it didn't make the words any less real. Because, right now, and for the past seven days, he has been her problem.

She just missed him... so much...

The knot in her throat went down to her lungs, and it became hard for her to breath. And those damn tears came to her eyes again, threatening with falling down her cheeks any moment now.

Desperate to get out of that elevator and as far away from him as she could, she took a deep breath, thanking all and any high being up above the moment the elevator doors finally opened up on the main lobby. Not wanting to be this weak, this vulnerable in front of him, she all but flung off the elevator as fast as her feet could carry her.

.-.

He stepped through the sliding doors, sure Seiya should be done and ready to go by now. But as his purple eyes landed on the elevators at the end of the room and he saw one tall blonde woman practically running out of it, one black haired singer just standing there, glaring after her, he frowned.

That sad look that seemed to had taken permanent home in her face, and green, sparkling eyes, was enough for him to know they hadn't exactly shared a pleasant, friendly elevator ride. And for the first time in the many, many years since he'd known Seiya, he seriously wanted to punch the guy.

"Haruka," he called out to her, trying to stop her and make sure she was alright. Though he knew, that would be a rather stupid question on his part.

But she just strode away, barely sending him a sided look and slightly shaking her head, going straight for the door and stepping out of the hospital. And he knew her well enough to know that, for the blonde racer, whenever she was too shaken, too upset, or just royally pissed, words didn't quite cut it.

_This can't be good_, he thought to himself, as he turned around just in time to see a seemingly relaxed, though slightly pissed, black haired singer, making his way towards him with the help of the crutches.

"What happened?" he asked, right to the point.

"What do you mean?" Seiya asked back, frowning. And then growling lowly when Taiki pointed to the general direction of the door one particular racer had just practically ran through. "Just Tenoh being Tenoh," he answered, shaking his shoulder and dismissing the subject.

Though Taiki had to admit, seeing him affected by her like this was kind of ironic.

"I don't know _what _her problem is," the black haired man murmured.

And Taiki chuckled, shaking his head. Yes, she affected him. Even if he was unable -or unwilling- to take a deeper look to understand why.

Stepping out of the hospital and into the cold air outside, he readjusted the scarf around his neck and started guiding the way to his car, eying the man beside him to make sure he was warmly wrapped up. Hitting the alarm button to unlock the car, he went to help Seiya with the crutches, when he noticed a silver Porsche Carrera GT parked right across the street.

Letting out a sigh, he opened the passenger door for Seiya. "Get in," he instructed, "I'll be right back."

"What? Where are you going?" Seiya asked, frowning confused.

"I'll be right back," he simply said again, as he got off the sidewalk and hurriedly made his way across the street.

He reached the parked Porsche and saw her sitting there. Grabbing the steering wheel with both hands, just sitting there; eyes closed, head tilted back. Long, blonde eyelashes slightly wet. And he didn't need her to open her eyes to know there were tears in her eyes she was obviously trying to keep from falling.

He tapped on her window, smiling gently and knowingly at her when she opened her eyes, a blinking, startled look upon her face as she looked up at him. Tears yet to be shed, shinning in green orbs.

"Hey," he said to her, when she rolled down her window for him. "You ok?"

"Yeah... you know," she answered, as a sided, sad smile came to her lips. "Hanging."

"What happened?" he wanted to know, pointing at his parked car with his head. "He wasn't being an ass, was he?"

"No," she was fast to say, shaking her head. "Just me being my charming self," she added, smiling cheekily, yet sadly, up to him.

Returning the same small, sided smile, Taiki had to actually bit his tongue to keep himself from asking her not to do this, not to go this way. She was miserable, and even if one particularly clueless singer wasn't really saying anything, he knew him well enough to know, he was miserable too. And though Taiki didn't exactly agree with her, he had to admit, her intentions were right placed. She wanted Seiya back, but she wanted him back on his own terms, and not because someone told him to.

She was giving him space, both to fully recover from the accident, and to mourn Kakyuu on his own. But he still thought Seiya had a right to know...

But he didn't say anything. He knew right now was the worst time possible to do so. And she surely had enough of people constantly asking if she was sure about this, openly trying to convince her otherwise, and he thought he could at least give her a break.

"Any news?" he asked instead, changing the subject.

Her smile widened just a little at that, though the sadness in her eyes remained. But before she could say anything, the sound of an insisting horn reached them, and neither of them needed to check to know it was coming from Taiki's car.

"You better go now before he starts yelling at you," she joked.

"Ok, but..."

"I'll call you later," she promised, interrupting him.

Knowing better than to argue with her, and quite aware of one impatient man waiting for him on his car, he simply nodded his head, shoving his hands into his pockets as she closed her window, starting the engine. Stepping aside, he let the car start its way down the street, disappearing among all the other vehicles.

He let out a sigh then, making his way to his own car and getting into the driver's seat.

"What was that all about?" Seiya asked the moment he got into the car.

"Nothing," he answered, starting the engine. "Just saying hi to a friend."

Black eyebrows went up in a curious, questioning manner, but Seiya refrained himself from making any comments.

Good. Because Taiki didn't think he could play indifferent and be the cool, controlled one; right now, he really did feel like testing Yaten's theory and hitting the black haired man in the head...


	7. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me. If you like it, say so, leave a review, add to favs or bookmark it. But please don't steal it.

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><p>Swallow it up in the sound of my screaming, cannot cease for the fear of silent nights.<br>Oh how I long for the deep sleep dreaming, the goddess of imaginary light.

In my field of paper flowers and candied clouds of multiply,  
>I lye inside myself for hours and watch my purple sky fly over me.<p>

I linger in the doorway of alarm clock screaming monsters calling widening.  
>Let me stay where the wind will whisper to me,<br>where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story.

If you need to leave the world you live in, lay your head down and stay awake.  
>Though you may not remember dreaming, something waits for you to breathe again.<p>

In my field of paper flowers and candied clouds of multiply,  
>I lye inside myself for hours and watch my purple sky fly over me.<p>

**(Imaginary - Evanescense)**

**.**

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><p><strong>6<strong>

He rested against the back of the couch, closing his eyes and letting out a sigh. He didn't think it was possible to be this majorly bored when having cable and over three hundred channels.

There was nothing on but boring reality shows, nosy talk shows with questionable ethics, and old movies even he remembered seeing. And that alone was saying a lot, but at least the movie channels promised more decent, recent movies for the nighttime. And considering he was currently unable to sleep nice and tight, he figured he could use a good movie and a big and decent bag of popcorn to kill time.

Opening his eyes again, he lazily took a look around the apartment.

It was nice, and clean, and somewhat spacious. But somehow, it felt... cold.

The decoration was tasteful and modern, but simple, perfectly matching his idea of a nice apartment to himself. Wide TV screen with a last generation home theater, and a black, amazingly comfortable couch right in front of it, coffee table in between, to ensure perfect enjoyment.

In the kitchen, a filled freezer -he figured the guys had something to do with that one-, a microwave, and a programmable coffee machine that, as he found out soon enough, made wonderful coffee. Of course, after the lousy excuse of a coffee he would get at the hospital, anything was great. But that coffee machine was just something else, and he patted himself on the back for ever getting it.

The bed was big and comfortable, with a nice, puffy and equally comfortable set of pillows to ensure a good night sleep. Only, he wasn't really getting much of that. But that had more to do with his blank, fragmented mind, than with the bed in itself.

So it wasn't the decorations, or the bed, or the space, or any other thing he could specifically point at. But something felt off. As if he hadn't lived there for a while or something. But then again, he hadn't. He had, after all, spent a little over a month in that hospital.

He shook his head, running his fingers through his hair as he let out another sigh. Maybe he was over thinking things too much. Or maybe he was just really tired. Being unable to sleep half the night could do that.

He knew he dreamed of Kakyuu. He couldn't remember seeing her or hearing her voice, but every single time he woke up in the middle of the night, he could distinctively remember feeling her near. And he had the feeling she was trying to tell him something. But, of course, he couldn't remember what it was, and it was starting to get really frustrating.

Ever since he woke up on that hospital, all he could ever recall from his dreams were vague feelings. Of her, and of someone else being around. But upon waking up, he could never tell if it was someone he knew or used to know, memories coming back to him in his sleep, or just his imagination. He couldn't even tell if it was a woman or a man. And yet he couldn't shake the feeling of someone else visiting his dreams off.

_This is so weird..._, he thought to himself, as once again he let his eyes travel around the room, only to land on his laptop.

Straightening up, he reached for it, opening it up, as the frown came back to his features.

Yet another puzzle, right there.

A rather generic wallpaper. A folder with very few pictures in it. Another one with a few texts document that seemed to be contracts of some sort. The default e-mail program wasn't even set, and of course he didn't know what server he used, let alone his password.

The one thing that was rather interesting in there was the music folders. One was filled with modern songs he guessed he liked, but he hadn't really gone through that playlist quite yet. The second folder contained four more folders in it with his own music. The last one on that list was the one with more songs; some already finished, others in need of a few arrangements. The guys told him he was working on his forth solo album, so that might explain why the half done songs. But what really intrigued him were the lyrics.

While the songs from his first album seemed to be more hopeful and kind of teasing, all the other ones were different. Again, there was hope and a bit of teasing in there, but more often than not, he found a certain edge to the lyrics, and to his own voice. A certain depth. As if he truly meant each and every word. As if he knew exactly what he was talking about, what his songs were saying. The way his voice sounded, as if he wasn't just singing to the mic, but to someone. Even if that someone wasn't present when he recorded the songs.

And while some songs were more of a declaration or an affirmation, a tale, others felt more like a secret, being unveiled by his singing, but just partially. Little hints here and there, for whoever who was listening to fill in with their imagination. And as he sat there, scrolling down the photographs loaded to his laptop of past events and parties and hang outs he didn't remember, he couldn't help but wonder, was there someone in particular who was able to fill in the empty spaces in his songs with actual events?

There was a group picture in particular that got his attention. It seemed to be some sort of party, maybe a birthday or something. Ami, Minako, Taiki and Rei were smiling up to the camera, hugging each other. He was there too, right in between Ami and a happy looking Usagi, who was gently resting against a tall, black haired guy he could only guess was her beloved Mamoru.

No matter how much it bothered him, he knew, Odango had someone. Someone that wasn't him.

It would never be him.

And though maybe one or two songs -the more hopeful, dreaming like ones- may have been written with the Moon Rabbit in mind, he knew for sure he hadn't exactly been thinking of her when writing most of his songs. Because they didn't sound like something he hoped for, or longed for, but rather something he already had. Something he already knew and cherished, and wanted to hold on to.

That depth, that maturity in his lyrics talked about something more than just a one sided, teenage love. But if all this was right, if there really was someone out there he had written all these songs to, then who was she? _Where _was she? Why wasn't she with him right now?

Was it all a past relationship, or just a product of his imagination and his own desire of actually having that? There was no trace he could find that would let him think there has ever been someone in his life...

He was a twenty four year old singer; he guessed the ladies were not exactly a problem for him. But he had never really been the casual, unattached relationship kind of guy, and he highly doubted he had changed so much that he no longer cared for something more meaningful. For something real. And if he did, then his own songs were the epitome of hypocrisy.

He growled lowly, closing his laptop. This was getting him nowhere.

He could always ask one of the guys about it. But he didn't want to. Besides the fact that he felt like a complete idiot asking someone else about his own love life -or lack thereof-, he wasn't so sure he actually wanted to find out. He was still having a hard time readjusting himself, trying to face the fact that he was no longer a kid, but a responsible grown up. A singer with a career, and even more importantly, a Senshi without a Princess.

His Princess being gone meant so many different things...

There was no hope left for them to somehow try to rebuild their home planet. Everything was lost and dead, and they had failed on their mission. He had miserably and royally failed as a Senshi, and there was nothing left to do but to go on, somehow.

With her still fresh memory lingering in his mind, chasing his dreams, he found a bit of comfort in his own music. A life boat of some sort. Something to keep himself going. His music, his own words and lyrics gave him hope; it really was possible to live without her, no matter how much it hurt. And right now, finding out what laid behind those lyrics, what secrets and stories his own songs weaved, with the very real possibility of finding out he was, still, all alone... he just wasn't ready for it.

Not now. Not when his own head was still such a mess.

He was being a coward, and he knew it. But he didn't care; he allowed himself to be one, at least for now.

Wanting to get his mind off himself, he grabbed the guitar resting against the couch. With no particular song in mind, he just stroked the strings, playing random notes and creating a melody to fit his current mood; slow, though slightly drifting. The nostalgic notes filled the apartment, as memories from his childhood and his home planet filled his mind. And he just sat there, stroking his guitar, letting the music transport him.

He was so taken away by it all, that the sound of the bell caught him by surprise. Blinking once, a frown came to his face, both wondering who could it be, and how long had they been outside his door.

A few minutes, at least, judging by that insistent ringing.

Letting out a sigh and placing his guitar back against the couch, he stood up, making his way to the door and taking a peek through the see-hole; a smile coming to his lips at the mop of black hair standing on the hallway.

"Hotaru, hi," he greeted, as he opened the door and the girl smiled up to him.

"Hi!" she greeted back. A cute, half worried frown decorating her face. "I was afraid you wouldn't open your door or something..."

"Sorry," he apologized, as he signaled for her to come in and pointed at his guitar. "Got a bit carried away."

"I know, I heard!" she said, smiling. "You're not too busy, are you?"

"No. Not at all," he answered, frowning when he finally noticed the bag she was carrying. "Why? Whatcha got in there?"

Placing the bag over the couch, she frowned at him. "We have a date, remember?" she asked, putting both hands on her hips. "Or did you forget all about it already?"

He chuckled at her faked hurt tone and face, lightly shaking his head. "Of course not."

"I know I'm not your type, and I'm too young for you, and you're more interested in playing the game than actually spending time with me," she stated, in a playfully accusing, kind of mocking tone that made him chuckle again, as she tried to keep up her serious, disapproving face, "but you could at least _pretend _to be nice."

"I _am_ nice," he pointed out, smiling. "And I'm glad you're here. You're cute."

Purple eyes rolled at that, and she shook her head. "Playing tricks already?" she teased.

And he laughed at that, shoving his hands into his pockets. "There's just no way to win with you, is there?"

She giggled then, shrinking her shoulders. "You'll get use to me again, don't worry," she stated, waving her hand.

Chuckling again, he tilted his head to a side as he saw her taking the famous console out of the bag. "You're different," he pointed out, walking up to her to take a closer look at the console. "From what I remember, I mean."

"I was nine years old," she pointed out, smiling cutely again. "I'm almost eighteen now, of course I'm different. I can drink now!" she exclaimed, jokingly. "And drive! And a certain someone was helping me on that one before he completely forgot about our deal..." she trailed off, arching an eyebrow towards him.

He raised his eyebrows at that, and she giggled again, waving her hand.

"Don't worry, we can get back to that later," she said, pointing at his cast. "It's not like you can drive now, anyway, right?"

He looked down on his leg, chuckling lightly again. "Guess not," he agreed. But then he frowned. "Don't you have someone else to ask for help with that?" he asked, kind of curious.

Hotaru smiled then, tilting her head to a side and frowning lightly. "You know what's the one down side on having three women as parents instead of the regular two?" she asked back. "They can be really overprotective. And I mean, way over the top!" she exclaimed, raising both hands to make her point. "I could have had my license two years ago. But Setsuna-mama isn't really that much into driving, and papa always says her driving skills are rusty. And, between you and me, that's just her way of saying Setsuna-mama drives slower than an old lady... And Michiru-mama thinks it's best if papa is the one teaching me, but she won't until I'm eighteen," she explained, in a rather cute, babbling manner. "Which, quite honestly, is totally unfair. I mean, she was already driving around full speed when she was, what? Fifteen?" she asked, rhetorically. "Sure, you just had an accident and ended up in a comma for two weeks, so I get it. It's a very valid reason to worry... but it's not like you were actually _in _the car when it happened... And, with that way of thinking, then I shouldn't even go out on the street because I could get shot or something!"

"That's a little over the top... but I guess I get your point," he said, slightly nodding his head in thought. "But don't you need a car, then?"

"Three parents, remember?" she asked, with a sheepish, cheeky smile on her face. "One of which is a car freak. Let's just say there are quite a few cars I could borrow if needed," she pointed out, giggling sheepishly. "But I need to know how to drive first."

"And that's where I come in, right?" he guessed, chuckling again as he placed the controls over the coffee table. "Do they actually know about this deal?"

Taking a pack of games out of the bag, she held them to her chest, smiling cheekily and sheepishly at him, giving him all the answer he needed. He chuckled again at that, guessing he had probably been unable to say no to her when he agreed to it. The girl surely knew how to get whatever she wanted with just her smiles...

"Do they know you're here?" he asked, suddenly, in between curious and just worried.

Hotaru obviously knew how to keep a secret, but he certainly didn't want her going behind her parents' backs. She was still a teenager, after all. And to top it off, her parents happened to be three specific women he knew would get on killer mode in the blink of an eye when it came to their daughter.

Or Usagi...

Specially a certain tall blonde he wasn't particularly fond of.

"'Course," she answered him, shaking one shoulder as if it was the most obvious answer in the world.

And he frowned at that, curiously. "Really?" he asked, incredulous, as he squatted down next to the TV set to help her connecting the console. "And they're ok with this?"

Purple eyes looked into his midnight blues, and she smiled to him, slightly tilting her head to a side as she seemed to be thinking her words. "Of course they are," she finally answered, kneeling next to the TV set as well. "I told you, we're good friends now," she explained, "and they know you're a nice guy."

"_He won't try anything."_

He heard the voice in his head, distant, almost like a hushed whisper, and he frowned at it.

"_You'll be a good boy, won't you?"_

Came the voice again, and he blinked, surprised.

It was just a voice, so distant and faded he couldn't recognize it. No face, no physical place or background to help him put a name, or even a moment in time to that voice and those words.

"And they know you won't hurt me and cut me off into little pieces to feed the devil's dogs or something," Hotaru's voice brought him back and out of his own mind.

And he blinked, completely taken by surprise by her comment. "What?"

She giggled, shaking her shoulders. "There's a lot of weird people out there," she reasoned. "And, sure, you're not exactly the perfectly normal, every day guy..." she pointed out, now shrinking her shoulders. "No offense."

"None taken," he assured her, now chuckling. She did have a point there, after all.

"But, you know... they trust you," she stated, smiling softly at him.

Not really knowing what to say to that, he just raised his eyebrows. The Outers trusted him? Well, that was definitively a first.

A very surprising one, at that.

He connected the cable to the TV, and Hotaru reached up for the pack of games on the coffee table. "So, considering you don't remember a thing," she started to say, waving Call of Duty around teasingly, "I promise to go easy on you."

"I'm sure I can manage."

"Yeah, sure... or!" she continued, taking another game, "We can just go for dear old Final Fantasy. So it's up to you. What do you want?"

The moment she asked that, he heard his own voice asking the exact same question, as he felt his own hands lingeringly traveling up soft, warm skin.

"_A yacht"_, came the mocking answer.

His hand now caressing a soft shoulder, right over the thin, black strap of a bra. His lips following his fingers' path, savoring each and every inch of that pearly white skin, and the feeling of a long, slender body pressed against his.

He heard himself asking another question as he pressed his hands against a flat, strong stomach, making the woman arch her back upon contact. The feeling of her, bucking her hips towards him, her skin trembling under his touch as his other hand traveled up and down the long arm resting against his neck... it felt so good...

"_A house on the suburbs," _came that voice again. _"With a big, nice backyard. And I always wanted a dog. A silver Labrador."_

"Are you ok?" came Hotaru's voice, suddenly bringing him back to his apartment.

And he blinked several times, trying to get rid of that strange, sinking feeling that took over him upon that flashing, yet evading image he just saw in his mind. It almost as if he had just lost something...

"Yeah..." he answered the girl, shaking his head. "I'm fine."

"You sure?"

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine," he lied, not wanting to worry the teenage girl, and putting on a smile just for her.

What was that?

.

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><p><strong>A.N.: <strong>yeah, what was that? lol

sorry for the delay! life!... anyway! let me know whatcha think!


	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** All SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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><p>Things happened, I ask you to come back...<br>I'm sorry for doing you wrong,  
>and for not being respectful.<br>Everything I did was the immaturity  
>of someone who hurts oneself,<br>time and time again.  
>I ask of you, don't go back,<br>so you'd understand.  
>Let everything happen today,<br>leave the pain behind.

Even if you want to  
>you'll never accept it.<br>If you let me,  
>I want to try again.<p>

I didn't want to lie to you,  
>it was hard saying it.<br>There's no words left to say,  
>no answers to give.<br>I feel this life would teach us,  
>what happened, it just happened.<br>I ask of you, don't go back,  
>so you'd understand.<br>Let time find us together again.

Even if you want to  
>you'll never accept it.<br>If you let me,  
>I want to try again.<p>

Even if you want to  
>you'll never accept it.<br>If you let me,  
>I want to try again.<p>

**(Aunque quieras - Diego Torres)**

**.**

* * *

><p><strong>7<strong>

The door opened up, and big, shining green eyes lighted up to her.

"Haruka!" the tall brunette exclaimed, pretty much dancing in the doorway and smiling to the blonde. "You made it!" she exclaimed, encircling her arms around the tall woman's waist and hugging her tightly as if she just became her favorite teddy bear.

And the blonde chuckled at Makoto's actions, patting her head tenderly. "Of course. Wouldn't miss it for the world."

The brunette let her go then, still smiling happily at her tall friend. "Thank you so much for coming!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands and jumping up again, before taking Haruka's hand and dragging her in. "Come on!"

"Hey," she said, stopping her before they could really walked into the living room, as she reached into her coat's inner pocket, taking out a small, though long, white envelope. "Happy birthday, Mako."

She blinked, once, before her smile came rushing back to her features, taking the offered envelope and opening it. And then she blinked once more, eyebrows going all the way up as she took a look at the voucher inside, and she looked up at the blonde with her green eyes wide opened.

"Le Cordon Bleu?" she asked, incredulous. "Is this a joke?"

The blonde chuckled, shaking her head. "Of course not," she assured her, shoving her hands into her pockets. "I thought you may like it."

"Like it? Are you _kidding _me?" Makoto asked, jumping up in pure excitement again. "This is _awesome_! Thank you so much!" she exclaimed, hugging the blonde again.

"You're welcome," Haruka said, chuckling again. "It was actually Seiya's idea. Before... you know..." she trailed off, tilting her head and then waving her hand around. "So, um... it's from the both of us, really. I just booked you up for next course."

A soft, understanding, and still pretty much happily ecstatic smile came to Makoto's lips then, as she held the voucher to her chest. "Thank you. Really, it's... it's amazing!"

She nodded her head, returning the smile. Everyone knew how much Makoto liked to cook, indulging everyone with her amazing cooking skills. And Haruka knew the brunette had been wanting to take that course for a while now, but could never really come up with enough money to pay for it.

During a business dinner with her sponsors and crew a little over two months ago, somehow the subject of chefs, culinary skills and high cuisine came up, and Le Cordon Bleu in Tokyo was mentioned. Something about accelerated, two month period courses for advanced cooks. And though the young brunette didn't exactly have a diploma of any kind, everyone already knew she was, indeed, an advanced cook, and Seiya thought it would be the perfect birthday present; to enroll her on that two months course, everything already paid for, so that Makoto could finally take that dream class.

"No problem," Haruka assured her, returning the smile. "All you have to do is enjoy your present, go there next month, and then cook something delicious and make us all fat," she joked. "I know how french people like to add enormous amounts of butter to everything..."

The brunette laughed, taking the blonde's hand again and guiding her in. "You got it!"

"Haruka!" Usagi greeting her, brightly smiling up to her the moment she entered the living room. "I'm so glad you're here!" she exclaimed, jumping off the couch she was sitting on and going to tackle hug the tall woman.

"Hey, Koneko," she greeted back, smiling tenderly. "Guys," she then said, greeting everyone else gathered around.

Rei, Yaten and Michiru were sitting around the coffee table, enjoying drinks and appetizers as they laughed and talked. Minako and Setsuna had taken the flowery cushions to themselves, as they too enjoyed their drinks around the low table. On the same couch Usagi had been sitting on, Mamoru talked to a somewhat tired looking Ami sitting on the couch right next to it -hospital talk, surely, considering how Ami was an intern in the same hospital Mamoru worked at.

And judging by the laughter and general noise coming from the kitchen, she didn't have to look to guess Hotaru, Seiya and Taiki were in there, surely pretending to help Makoto, but actually just messing around.

Well, maybe Taiki really was helping...

Giving her coat to Makoto when the brunette offered to take it away and hang it, she stood there for a moment, mindlessly rearranging the cowlneck of her cream wool sweater. A sudden nervousness invading her as encouraging blue eyes locked with hers, and the aquamarine haired violinist nodded her head, smiling softly at her.

Taking a deep breath and preparing herself, she walked into the kitchen. Her green orbs fell almost immediately on the tall, handsome man standing by the counter; her heart sinking in and her breath getting caught in her throat at the sight of him. His long, jet black hair was tied up on its usual low ponytail, cascading down his strong back. His deep, midnight blue eyes shone in his white face, contrasting with the black turtleneck sweater that accentuated his broad shoulders perfectly. Dark blue jeans, a black leather belt, and matching black shoes.

His cast was gone, as she already knew, it had been removed the day before. Both Yaten and Taiki made it a point on keeping her informed on everything and anything that had something to do with the black haired singer these days, while keeping a close eye on her as well. The last part was just a guess on her part, but it wasn't such a hard one.

He looked good.

He looked really good. And she missed him.

So, so much...

.-.

He looked up when the teenage girl standing by his side stopped trying to stick her fingers into the chocolate frosting they were both supposed to be putting on the muffins, frowning curiously when he heard her squealing happily. His frown deepening when he saw the tall blonde woman standing there, as he took in her appearance.

Those washout skinny jeans were something he had never seen her wearing before. Or anything remotely like it. And that surprised him.

It wasn't exactly what he would call a girly outfit, or even strictly feminine. Though those jean pants were tight enough to give a good idea of exactly how long her obviously well toned legs were, the wide, loosen cream sweater hid all and any hint of her true gender. The brown leather buckled riding boots added a relaxed, yet still somehow imposing air to her final appearance.

She looked different. Somehow...

Sure, she still kept her blonde hair short and seemingly untamed, and she still wore those small, golden hoop earrings of hers. And even if those tight jeans were kind of a surprising thing for her to be wearing, that wasn't it. It wasn't in what she was wearing, or in the way she smiled to Hotaru, hugging the girl and then ruffling her bangs in a tender matter. It was more of a feeling he got from her, like a sense of... something...

He couldn't quite put his finger on what it was about her that seemed so different. But he knew for sure there was something -whatever that was- the moment he looked into green eyes, and she was barely able to look at him for a few seconds, before adverting her gaze away. And that made his frown deepened; if there was one thing he was absolutely sure of, was that she was not the kind of woman to ever advert her eyes away like that.

He shook his head, turning his attention back to the muffins. He couldn't care less about Tenoh, anyway.

.-.

She chatted away, trying her best to act normal as she hugged and smiled up to her papa. But it didn't take a wise man to notice the awkward atmosphere the blonde's presence had brought into the kitchen.

And even though Seiya was clueless, most certainly making a completely wrong assumption and reading the wrong signs, Haruka's nervousness, though subtle, was still there. In the way she stood there, hands in her pockets, and not really saying much at all, with a half smile in her lips that didn't reach her eyes.

She hated seeing her this dull...

"You're just in time for the badly frosted muffins," Taiki joked, obviously pulling the same act, putting up the charade.

She giggled, taking a look at the aforementioned treats. Though the part about the muffins wasn't far from the truth.

"I see," the blonde said, chuckling lightly.

"Don't worry," she put in, in a reassuring tone. "Makoto made the mix, so you won't get food poisoned or anything..."

Haruka laughed then, and she smiled up to her papa.

She missed that, the sound of her laughter. A sound she hadn't heard in over three weeks now. And though it was more of a halfhearted laugh instead of that rich, deep sound she was so used to, it was a laugh all the same.

"Good to know," she said, now chuckling lightly.

"What? Not perfect enough for you?" Seiya asked, in a joking tone that, even to her, sounded more mocking than actually just joking, as he took a muffin and offered it to the blonde. But when she didn't take it right away, he rolled his eyes. "It's not poisoned, I promise."

The hurt look that flashed through green eyes for a second before being masterly disguised was enough for her to want to punch the black haired singer. No matter how much she actually liked him.

But before she could do or say anything Taiki did it for her, elbowing him rather strongly on the ribs. And Seiya winced, more in surprise at the hit than in actual pain, before rubbing the back of his neck as he laughed it off.

"We followed Mako's instructions," he said, now in a more joking, less mocking and subtly hostile tone. "So, you know..."

"Yes," Taiki said, glaring at the singer for a moment before smiling to her papa. "We did, religiously. So you're safe."

"It's ok, I'll pass," the blonde said, shaking her head. "My stomach's a bit queasy today," she then added, placing a hand over her stomach as she did so and wincing lightly.

"Really?" came Makoto's voice, as the tall brunette walked into the kitchen. Yaten trailing right behind her. "Something you ate?"

"I guess," the blonde answered, though Hotaru guessed it had more to do with her nervousness and summed up stress from the last three weeks, than anything her papa may had actually eaten.

"Oh..." the brunette trailed off, pouting disappointed as she walked up to the counter. "Guess you won't be drinking my super special fruit extravaganza."

"Your what?" Haruka asked, frowning now.

"My fruit extravaganza," Makoto repeated, smiling widely now. "It's actually just your regular fruit mix juice, with a little bit of rum," she explained, winking. "But special fruit extravaganza sounds better."

"A little bit?" Yaten asked, arching an eyebrow to the tall brunette, and then just shaking his head as he turned to Haruka. "We're gonna have a bunch of seriously drunk women in about half an hour."

"The fruit makes it really, really sweet, so you don't really taste the alcohol," she said, smiling up to her papa. And then giggling sheepishly when green eyes glared at her in an obviously disproving way. "Just had a little sip, I swear," she assured her, in a low voice.

"Aw, come on!" Makoto exclaimed. "It's my birthday! Let her have a drink or two."

"You're a really bad influence," the blonde noted, shaking her head and once again shoving her hands into her pockets.

"It's called 'celebrating'," Seiya retorted, rolling his eyes. "Having a few drinks it's part of the tradition."

"She's not even eighteen yet," Haruka pointed out, shaking her shoulder.

"Yet," Seiya remarked, again rolling his eyes. "And we're all here, anyway. It's not like we're going to let her get completely wasted."

"It's ok, I'm not much into alcohol anyway," she put in, trying to save the moment from the upcoming argument between her papa and her clueless boyfriend. "I just had a sip, that's all."

"You're too uptight," the black haired guy grunted out, shaking his head.

"Hey, hey, now," Makoto interrupted, giggling nervously. "No need to argue, here. It's just a silly drink."

"Yeah," Yaten added, glaring at his comrade. "You don't have to be rude."

"I'm not being rude," Seiya defended himself. "She's the one coming in, acting all superior and ruining the fun."

"Seiya!" she scolded him; her purple eyes going wide opened, both surprised and ashamed at the singer's grunted out words.

"It's ok, kiddo," the blonde said, putting a hand on her shoulder and making her look up at her. A well disguised hurt swinging in green eyes, though Hotaru knew how to read her papa's masks. "You have your fun, and I'll go hang with the rest."

With that said, the tall racer stepped out of the kitchen. Four pair of eyes following her figure, before they all turned to look at one black haired singer.

Raising his hand and slapping Seiya's head, Yaten rolled his eyes at him when the singer complained, rubbing the back of his head. But the shorter man ignored him, shaking his head in a disproving manner. "You're an idiot," he simply stated.

"What did I do?"

"Nothing," Makoto said, shrinking her shoulders and exchanging glances with Taiki and Yaten, before shaking her head, going back to the mixer. "Let's just go back to celebrating, shall we?"

.-.

He took the empty glasses to the kitchen, where a slightly overly happy Minako and a giggling Ami were cleaning the dishes and trying not to break anything -a bit of a hard task, considering their current state. He chuckled at the funny picture they made, with the enormous amount of dishwashing liquid filling the sink and counter with bubbles as the duo laughed and argued back and forth.

Leaving the slightly drunken women to themselves, Taiki walked back into the living room, and a fast look around told him someone was missing. A frown came to his features and he scratched the back of his neck, wondering where she could have disappeared into -he knew she was still somewhere around, she wouldn't go home without saying goodbye... would she?-, when he noticed the opened balcony door, and the lone figure standing there.

Letting out a sigh, he made his way to the balcony and stepped out.

And there she was, resting her forearms on the railing, her gaze lost somewhere in the sky. And she just stood there. Without her jacket, he noticed...

"Hey," he called out to her, as he went to stand next to her, resting his own arms over the railing as well, and turning his face to look at her. "What are you doing?"

She shook her shoulder. "Just needed some fresh air," she answered after a moment, not tearing her eyes away from the gray sky.

He frowned again at her answer. Over the few hours they've been here, a somewhat uncomfortable air surrounded them all whenever Seiya would say something to the tall racer. Not as bluntly as that one episode in the kitchen; his comments were more subtle, though still mocking, and isolated rather than a constant verbal attempt to pick up a fight.

But the blonde would never answer him, letting the comments slide. And even if he didn't know her as well as Setsuna or Michiru -or Seiya, even if he didn't remember a thing-, he did know her well enough to know she was putting up a mask, both to shield herself, and not to ruin Makoto's birthday.

"You know he doesn't really mean what he said," he offered, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder.

A strange sound, somewhere in between a chuckle and a chocked sigh escaped her then, and incredibly sad eyes turned to look at him. "Yes, he does," she argued. "That's why it hurts so much. Because he really means it."

"Haruka..."

"But I don't blame him, you know?" the blonde continued, turning her eyes back to the sky. "I mean, if I were on his place, I'd probably do the same," she said. But then she chuckled again, looking into purples eyes for a moment. "Or worse..."

He had to chuckle at that, perfectly remembering exactly how unfriendly the racer had been towards the three of them in general and one black haired man in particular in the past.

"He loves you," Taiki pointed out, comforting.

"He hates me," Haruka corrected him, as she crossed her arms over her chest, both in a protecting manner, and in an attempt to keep herself warm. "That's all he knows. And I can't blame him for that."

"He's crazy about you, and you know that," he pointed out, trying to comfort her. "_Everyone _knows that. And the second he gains his memory back, he's gonna want to kick himself and beg for you to forgive him and take him back."

She chuckled again at that, and from the corner of his eyes he noticed how she reached up a hand to her face, wiping a single tear.

"Probably coming up with some gigantic, romantic gesture, too," he joked. "Embarrassing you to no ends while at it."

"Yeah... probably," she agreed, chuckling softly again. "I miss him," she then added, in a hushed whisper.

And the way she said that, with so much pain, held back and controlled... It broke his heart, seeing her like this.

"He's still here."

She let out a sigh then, looking up at the sky for a moment before turning her face to a side to look at him. And the hurt swimming in those green, watering orbs was enough to break him.

"No, he's not," she argued, as she was now obviously losing the battle against her own tears. "He's not, and I want him back..."

Her voice broke down, and crystal tears started cascading down her already reddened, cold cheeks.

Not knowing what to say or do to comfort her, he did the only thing he could think of. Encircling his arms around her shoulders, he led her to him, offering a shoulder to cry on. And she cried harder at the gesture, grabbing the material of his sweater with shaking fits and hiding her face in his neck.

"I miss him... _so _much," she chocked out in between tears.

"I know, I know," he said, in a comforting tone, as he rubbed her back with his hands, letting her cry out. Vaguely wondering if this was the first time she allowed herself to cry at all.

And, knowing her, it probably was.

For once in his life out of words, knowing there wasn't much he could say that would make her feel any better, knowing the one thing that would make things right was out of his control, he just held her as she cried. Silently, softly.

Brokenhearted.


	9. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer: **All SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi, but this story belongs to me. Please do not steal!

.

* * *

><p>Don't leave me in all this pain.<br>Don't leave me out in the rain.  
>Come back and bring back my smile.<br>Come and take these tears away.  
>I need your arms to hold me now,<br>the nights are so unkind.  
>Bring back those nights when I held you beside me.<p>

Unbreak my heart.  
>Say you love me again.<br>Undo this hurt you caused  
>when you walked out the door<br>and walked outta my life.  
>Uncry this tears<br>I cried so many nights.  
>Unbreak my heart...<p>

Take back that sad word, goodbye.  
>Bring back the joy to my life.<br>Don't leave me here with these tears,  
>come and kiss this pain away.<br>I can't forget the day you left, time is so unkind.  
>And life is so cruel without you here beside me.<p>

(…) Don't leave me in all this pain.  
>Don't leave me out in the rain.<br>Bring back the nights when I held you beside me.

Unbreak my heart.

_**(Unbreak my heart - Tony Braxton)**_

_awesome masochist classic!_

.

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><p><strong>8<strong>

She made her way to the park in an easy jog, keeping a slow pace to warm up. But after a good fifteen minutes, she was now ready to go faster. A small, sided smile coming to her lips as she sped up a little, gradually, going down her usual route and following the path.

It was very early in the morning, and barely anyone was out yet, except maybe the occasional runner doing the exact same thing as her. Mostly young people, too, probably doing a bit of exercise before heading off to work. Taking advantage of the quietness all around and the lack of teenagers, small children and dogs that were usually all around, and just enjoying the winter morning.

The cold wind meeting her face came as a relief, and she sped up again. Not enough to actually exhaust herself out, but fast enough so that she could get that feeling of freedom and wildness running through her veins. She ran, wishing she could actually take off and fly, to be one with her element. To free herself from her own body, her own skin, so that she wouldn't feel that hole in her chest anymore. Such emptiness, deep inside.

For a moment, she felt weightless as the wind carried her. But that hole in her chest wouldn't let her be free, keeping her chained to the ground, to her pain. To her loneliness.

She missed him, so much.

A chocked whimper escaped her, and suddenly it felt as if she couldn't breathe. The air simply stopped reaching her lungs, and for a moment she thought she was going to choke to death. Taking a deep breath, she forced the air back into her lungs, but it didn't work.

She couldn't breathe!

She fell. Hard on her knees; hands hitting the floor, hurting her. And she stared at the bricked floor, blinking at it, as she took deep breaths. The fresh air hurt her lungs, and the cold wind suddenly didn't feel so welcoming anymore. As if everything around her hurt. Everything _inside_ her hurt.

And as her rational mind told her it was all just a feeling, a sensation, and not reality, she hated herself for being this weak. For missing him so much. For needing him like this. She couldn't even sleep through an entire night without him. It was ridiculous!

But she hated the skies even more, despising fate for taking him away from her like this.

He was right there, and yet, he was so out of reach...

It was pure torture, and she just couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't hold it in.

Hurt, angry, frustrated, she hit the floor with her fist. The cold, hard bricks hurt her knuckles, making them crack; skin giving way to blood upon the hard contact. But she didn't care. She took it in, embracing it, even. Hoping for the pain going through her hand right now to suppress the pain in her heart.

It didn't work. That pain, that hole was still there.

Damn it! It didn't work!

.-.

Shoving his hands into his pockets, he took a turn to the left, enjoying the fresh, morning wind of the upcoming winter and the warming sun upon his face. He didn't know why, but he had woken up, suddenly, with the urge to get out and go... somewhere.

Ever since waking up on that hospital, he felt as if something was amiss. He wasn't sure of what, but something inside him told him so; there was something incredibly wrong. And not knowing what, being unable to point it down and know what that was, was utterly frustrating.

And that morning he had woken up, midnight blue eyes staring up at the ceiling, arms spread over the sheets, and an almost unbearable sense of loneliness consuming him. Attacking him, as he laid there, wondering what it was that was making him feel this way. Wondering if this loneliness was a part of this new life of his.

With all this strange noise in his head, with the sudden, desperate need of fresh air, he had thrown some clothes on and then took off, making his way to the park. And here he was now, with that strange feeling still pressing down his chest as he strolled down the bricked path.

A flash of white and gray crossed his line of vision, and he frowned, following with his eyes the lone figure running at such amazing speed -though he knew it could be much faster than that-, thirty feet away from him.

Short, golden locks dancing wildly around her face. Her white, loosen hoodie sticking to her chest and marking her figure as she ran. Her long legs, covered in gray workout pants, easily carrying her, fast and agile. And he surprised himself at noticing all these things, all these small, little details about her.

But then she stopped, tripping over something and falling, hard on her knees. And what surprised him the most was not the fall, even if he knew she was not the clumsy type, but the fact that she just froze there, on her hands and knees, staring at the floor. It made him wonder if maybe she was sick or something, and if he should walk his way over there and make sure she was alright.

But before he even had the time to decide on whether or not he should approach her, he saw her hitting the floor with her fist. Hard and angry. And then she wiped her face off with the back of her hand, moving to stand up again.

.-.

Angrily wiping the tears that only now she noticed cascading down her face, she stood up. Holding her now injured hand to her chest, she closed her eyes, taking deep breaths and trying to calm herself.

Breaking down like this didn't help. If anything, it only made her feel even more miserable. And she hated being weak. She wasn't used to being weak.

She didn't _want_ to be weak.

She was a strong, independent person. That was her very nature. Yet lately, she found she had to keep reminding herself that. Because she didn't feel that strong anymore. She was just so exhausted, both physically and emotionally, and all she wanted was for things to go back to the way they used to be. To feel like herself again, strong and independent, and to go home to one black haired singer.

She knew she loved him. But this... being away from him like this was unbearable. And she just wasn't strong enough...

But she had to. She knew she had to, even if it hurt. Regardless of how much it hurt. Even if she missed him so goddamned much she couldn't sleep anymore. And even if he never came back to her.

Taking another deep breath and forcing the tears back to where they came from upon that last thought, she shook her head. Raising her head to the sky, contemplating the rolling clouds for a moment, she took another deep breath, letting the sun warm up her face.

Not everything was lost. And she just had to be strong.

.-.

Was she crying?

He couldn't tell. But she seemed troubled. Hurt, even, as he saw her standing there for a moment, as if trying to decide something herself, to then shake her head and take off, running fast and away in no time.

He knew he shouldn't care, and it bothered him that he did. And yet, he couldn't help but wonder... what could possibly be troubling the strong Senshi of the Winds so much, for her to fall down on her knees and then hit the floor like that?

He would gladly tag it all as her letting some frustration or another out, bury it on some deep dark corner of his mind and just move on, completely forgetting all about it. And he normally would, if it weren't for the fact that he had seen her cry.

He couldn't be sure if she had been crying just now or not, but he knew for sure she had broken into tears for some reason or another not two days ago, back at Makoto's birthday, in Taiki's arms. And though the completely valid question of why was she crying in Taiki's arms in the first place was still unanswered, what intrigued him even more was the reason behind her tears.

He may not remember a lot of things right now, but he had always known the difference between a woman crying out of hysteria -or a tantrum-, and a broken woman in tears. And that afternoon, in Makoto's balcony, and with his tall brunette friend holding her, Tenoh had been broken.

Heartbroken, even. With silent tears rolling down her face as she tried to hid herself on Taiki's chest. Probably not wanting to worry anyone, not wanting the others to know she was, in fact, crying. Desperately and brokenly.

Fearing he had somehow hurt her, he had went to Taiki, asking what was all that about. Because, no matter how much he would argue with her -even though she hadn't been much of a worthy arguing partner lately-, or disagree with her opinions and overall stubbornness, he wasn't a complete, heartless asshole. He never actually meant to hurt her with his words. He didn't think that was actually possible in the first place. She had always been such a strong, proud woman; words would hardly affect her. And even if he didn't want to admit it, and for incomprehensible reasons, seeing her like that troubled him.

For some reason, Taiki had played it fool, not offering any kind of answer, and Seiya had been more than happy to just assume she was maybe going through some difficult moment in her life or something that wasn't really any of his business. And it wasn't. Anyone sending him off for even asking would be completely right to do so.

And yet... he couldn't help but wonder, what was hurting her so much that it made her break down in Taiki's arms? What terrible, unbearable pain would bring her down to her knees like that?

Why was Haruka crying?

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><p><strong>A.N.: <strong>Sorry for the shortie! Making it longer was just... well, no working!

**Next on Remember me?:** "You know... tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are..."


	10. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi, but this story belongs to me. So please don't steal it!

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You guys wanting to hit Seiya so much is starting to worry me... lol!

**Faia Fire:** although it is a sequel to Fiery Tales, I don't think it's fair to compare them. I mean, the first one was the begining, true, but it was more... raw? Ok, fine, horny. And this one is set a few years after that; their love grew strong over the years, and without that, all the pain and drama would just make no sense at all...

I so didn't know you liked "Life with the Outers", too. Yes, I came across that little post of yours in the forums. Why? 'Cause I know it all, that's why. Ok, not all. Wish I knew the wining lotery numbers... *sigh* but I don't...

**petiyaka:** you know, you can say you want Haruka to go back to Michiru all you want, but I know you're enjoying this! XD you faithful, crazy reader!

**Bony:** I'm sorry the last few chaps were annoyingly down. And no, I'm not depressed. It's just that kind of story, but I hope you can still somewhat enjoy it in all its sadness glory anyways.

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>Anyway! Guess what? New chap!<p>

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><p>I don't know what I felt<br>that afternoon, when I saw you.  
>I was thinking about other things,<br>but you meant a lot to me.  
>I believed in your words,<br>your eyes set me up.  
>Now I know you're not mine,<br>the blame is on me.  
>I didn't mean to hurt you,<br>that was never my intention.  
>We were victims of an impulse,<br>I was only searching for love.

And when I saw you in the street  
>I couldn't help the silence taking over me,<br>I was left speechless.  
>Now I know you're not mine,<br>the blame is on me.  
>You can leave if you want to,<br>There's only one thing that I ask;  
>if there's still a bit of love left<br>inside your heart,  
>don't look into my eyes,<br>because I die, I die in pain.  
>Do it for me.<p>

And thinking about your eyes,  
>I can't smile anymore.<br>You can leave if you want to,  
>There's only one thing that I ask;<br>if there's still a bit of love left  
>inside your heart,<br>don't look into my eyes,  
>because I die, I die in pain.<br>Do it for me.

**(Hacelo por mí - Attaque 77)**

**.**

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><p><strong>9<strong>

He rested his elbows against the counter, mindlessly playing with his drink, making the liquid swirl around in the glass. The music was good and kind of catchy, but of course, he didn't know the song. He was slowly getting used to not knowing stuff. Didn't matter if he didn't remember, or if he honestly didn't know in the first place.

Taking a sip, he let his eyes wander around the dance floor. Not really knowing if it was because of her height or because of her happily drunken state, his midnight blues landed on a sensually, teasingly dancing brunette. Her hair was up in a carefully studied messy bun, leaving her neck bare and exposed. The black lace dress with the corset like bra marking her figure made her looked older.

He shook his head then, lightly chuckling to himself. She _was_ older. They all were. All miniskirts and high heels, dressing tees and sexy tops.

They were out celebrating Makoto's birthday. Again. Minako had phoned him earlier that day, giving him a speech about being young and beautiful only once, and then informing him they were all going out clubbing to have a proper, official celebration of Makoto's twenty fourth birthday. And though he couldn't really find a valid reason as to why the one celebration they had at her place didn't exactly qualify as 'official', a good old night out couldn't hurt.

Yes, they were definitively older. And they certainly dressed as such, he noted, as he allowed his blue eyes to admire the more mature, more graceful body of one particular blonde. With her hair in her usual, trademark style, the endless pigtails cascading down her back and dancing behind her, she moved to the music, arms raised up and hips swinging to the sides.

Odango sure made one beautiful woman. Specially on that little light pink, one shoulder dress, kissing her every curve like that. But as he contemplated her dancing figure, a frown came to his features.

She was beautiful, and very, very attractive, yet... he wasn't exactly attracted to her...

And as he saw the black haired man he came to know as Mamoru going to the petite blonde and hug her, making her turn around and kiss the guy deeply and lovingly, he had to admit, the scene in front of him didn't exactly break his heart, as he thought it would. It didn't bothered him as much as it would have, eight years ago. The gentle, loving way he held her waist, the adoring look upon her face; it didn't make him jealous. It didn't make him wish he was him. But it did feed that nagging little feeling, deep inside him. That same feeling that has been keeping him awake half of the night -the half he didn't spend sleeping and dreaming of his Princess, to then wake up unable to recall his own dreams at all.

Seeing Usagi with Mamoru like that, like the couple they really were, didn't break his heart, but it made him feel lonely. It made him want that for himself. And even more strangely, it made him miss that...

Was it even possible to miss something he never had?

"A scofflaw, please," a female voice next to him said, taking him out of his own thoughts and making him turn to the lady in question.

Aquamarine curly hair pulled up in a low, stylish messy bun. Just a little bit of eyeshadow and mascara adorning blue eyes, and a cream colored, strapless ruffle dress that seemed to be painted over her body, Michiru rested her forearms against the counter, as she waited for the bartender to fix her drink.

"Oh, Seiya, hi!" she greeted him, smiling. "Didn't see you there."

"Hi," he greeted back, slightly nodding his head. "A scofflaw, uh?"

"The classy girl likes whiskey," she said, as her blue eyes went wide opened, faking a surprised expression. "Shock, shock, shock!"

He chuckled at that, amused at her teasing, joking attitude. "Indeed. Though I'm wondering if you can actually handle that."

"I'm a big girl," she assured him, now offering a softer, genuine smile. "But thanks for your concern," she said, again smiling, as the bartender gave her the requested drink.

Turning around, now resting her back against the counter, she took a sip, not particularly looking in a rush to get away from him. Taking that as a good sign -maybe Hotaru really wasn't the only one he was in good terms with-, he relaxed against the counter himself, taking a sip from his own kamikaze drink.

"So, how are you?" the violinist asked, tilting her head to a side and looking at him. "I know I haven't asked before, and I apologize for that," she soon added, smiling.

And that surprised him. She was being polite, and he already knew Michiru could easily be crowned the queen of politeness and impeccable manners. But it was the gentile, honest tone in her voice, and that genuine smile she gave him that he wasn't really expecting.

True, Michiru had never been anything but nice and polite towards him. Teasing, even. But he could clearly remember Neptune's deadly glares and her well placed -in her mind, at least- but still quite acid words.

"It's ok, I know you're busy and all," he said, returning the smile. "And I'm... you know... getting used to things, I guess."

A small frown that resembled a wince came to her features then, and Michiru smiled at him. "Still unable to recall anything?"

"Nope," he answered, shaking his head in denial. "Not a thing. Just one big black hole."

She tilted her head to a side again, in thought for a moment, before the smile came back to her features. "Well, if there's any way I can help you out... just ask."

"Thanks, I appreciate that," he said, returning the smile. "It's really nice of you."

She chuckled softly at that. "Why? Was I ever under the 'not so nice' tag?"

He had to chuckle too. _Kinda... but not exactly..._, he thought to himself. But out loud, he said instead, "Well, no, but... you know... tell me who your friends are and I'll tell you who you are..."

She frowned again then, wrinkling her nose in a disproving, yet kind of amused manner. "Ouch!" she exclaimed, raising her free hand up to her chest.

"I'm sorry!" he exclaimed back, chuckling again. "But, you know... you get what I mean..."

"I do," she agreed, nodding her head. "And I mean that. Ouch."

"I just don't understand what you see in her," he defended himself. "She's not exactly the friendly, approachable kind."

"See, that's where you're completely wrong," she disagreed with him. "She _is_. You two just started off with the wrong foot, that's all."

"Yeah, you can say _that_."

"And, for the record," she continued, smiling again, "and since you have this whole amnesia little thing of yours going on... we're not together anymore."

He blinked at that, honestly and utterly surprised at the news. And somehow, his reaction made her smile get a bit wider. Smugger, even.

"Haven't been, for _years_," she empathized. "But she's still very, very important to me. She's my best friend, and I don't take it lightly when people talk badly of her," she warned, smiling at him, yet somehow managing to sound kind of threatening. "So keep any unflattering comments to yourself."

Now, that was the kind of tone Neptune would use. Polite, charming even, but still deadly serious.

"Or in Hotaru's words, if you can't make it cute, keep it mute," she finished, as her soft, charming smile came back to her features for a moment, before taking a sip from her drink.

Again, he chuckled at her last comment, shaking his head. "I will, promise," he assured her, raising one hand, palm up.

"Good," she said, giggling now as she raised her glass in silent toast. "Because we're friends, and I kind of like you."

"Friends, uh?"

"Yes. And I'm not particularly fond of having to be mean to my friends," she joked, winking at him.

"Well, I'm not fond of my friends being mean to me, so we're on the same page," he joked along with her, chuckling lightly. "But I have to admit, I was starting to think Hotaru was the only one I'm in good terms with..."

She almost chocked with her own drink at his words. And he frowned at her when the violinist simply laughed, as if he had just said the funniest thing in the world or something.

"Oh, dear!" she said, calming herself down and placing a hand over her chest. "I think I really needed a good laugh..."

"What?" he asked, honestly lost and confused. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing," she answered, waving her hand. "Everything. Life, its ironies..." she trailed off, obviously still amused over something. But then she shook her head, composing herself. "Don't mind me. I'm just the classy girl with a drink in her hand and..." she joked, trailing off when a new song started playing, and a big smile came to her face, "dying to go in there and dance to this song!" she finished, obviously excited now, as she pulled from his hand.

But he stood his place, hesitating. And she pouted at him.

"Come on, let's dance!" she pleaded.

"I don't even know this song", he excused himself.

She tilted her head to a side, arching a mocking eyebrow. "That's a rather lame excuse, and you know it."

Yes, he did. But that feeling that attacked him a few minutes ago was still there, and it had pretty much ruined is party mood.

And as his eyes landed on the form of one tall blonde woman moving to the music in the middle of the dance floor, he came up with yet another reason not to take Michiru's offer up. Sure, she had just clearly said they were no longer together. But vividly remembering Tenoh's reaction on that dressing room, and her well known tendency to over-protectiveness, he just wasn't risking it.

The last thing he needed right now was to go back to that hospital. And though normally he wouldn't, not for the life of him, back away like that, the truth was, he wasn't fully recovered. The lack of proper sleep just adding to the equation, and he just wasn't stupid enough as to fuel any kind of fight when he knew he wasn't strong enough to face one yet.

"I think I'll have to pass," he said to the violinist, shaking his shoulder. "Thanks for the offer, though."

She pouted at him one last time, before finally giving up and just heading to the dance floor by herself.

He followed her with his gaze as the violinist made a straight line to the blonde dancing in there, taking her hand and making her dance with her. And as his eyes went from the violinist in the tight, sexy little cream dress to the tall woman now dancing next to her, he found himself contemplating her. Taking in her every detail.

Once again, he was surprised at her choice of clothing. A carbon colored swing tank, lose enough not to mark her figure, though the cleavage line clearly insinuated her rather generous curves, and a wine colored sleeveless sweater cardigan over it. Black pencil pants covering her toned, amazingly long legs, and low heeled, suede wine colored boots on her feet.

And once again, he found there was something different about her. And he was sure that black eyeliner around her eyes wasn't it. And it wasn't the way she was dancing either, rocking her hips from side to side, hands in lose fits and raised up in the air, eyes closed, and head swinging to the beat.

So what was it?

Though the rocking of her hips, the circular movements she was making, was kind of... enchanting... Alluring, even. In a completely, surprisingly sensual way.

The lights changed, following the music, from red to blue, and as his eyes were following Tenoh's movements as she danced, something else flashed in front of his eyes.

Hips moving. Slower. Sultrier. An under layer of pink covering the front, and then nothing but mesh black lace. A black laced bra with that same pink under layer covering round, generous breasts, as teasing hands cupped them.

And then those same hands, dancing in the air. Slowly. Sensually. Teasingly going down that glorious cleavage, and then lifting up wavy, raven hair up, leaving a long, soft looking neck bare and exposed.

And just as they came, the flashing images disappeared, leaving him blinking in surprise, as he was once again watching the tall racer's dancing figure. Not nearly as sensually as the mysterious woman, but somehow just as coordinated and gracefully.

He shook his head, clearing his mind. What the hell was he doing, staring at her, anyway?

"You ok?" came Yaten's voice from right behind him, and he welcomed the distraction, turning around to face the shorter man.

"Yeah, everything's cool."

Yaten frowned at him, arching an eyebrow. "You sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," he answered, now a bit annoyed.

"You kind of zoned out for a moment..." Yaten pointed out, frowning rather worriedly.

"I was just talking to Michiru before she went out to dance," he said, as if that would explain everything. His eyes landing on one swinging blonde head again, and the frown coming back to his features. "She looks kinda drunk..."

"Michiru?"

"No," he answered, pointing at the blonde with his head. "Tenoh."

And she did. He knew she was too uptight and too stiff to ever dance like that, so freely. Gulping, he admitted her carefree movements, her twisting body, her rocking hips, the way she pulled her bangs out of her eyes, running her fingers through her hair and raising up her face, with her eyes closed, exposing her long neck and arching her back, insinuating her cleavage... the end result was a rather sensual looking Tenoh, dancing in the middle of the night club.

So, yes, she had to be drunk. Or maybe he was the one with the alcohol going up his brain...

"I hope not..." Yaten's whispered comment didn't escape him, and he frowned again, now turning back to look at his friend. "What?" the shorter man asked, noticing the questioning glare upon midnight blues. "You're not the only one I don't like to play nanny with. It's a general dislike to that kind of job."

He blinked a few times, trying to find some sense into Yaten's words. But when he couldn't find any, he just blinked at him. "Why would you _ever_ play nanny with _her_?"

The lime green eyed man shook his shoulder at the question, pointing at the bunch of beautiful women dancing not that far away from the drunk looking racer. "Been around them for too long," he justified himself. "Their lovey dovey, 'I care for my friends and look after them' shit is contagious, ok?"

Not wanting to make sense out of that one affirmation and adding any kind of meaning that had something to do with the playing Tenoh's nanny part, he simply raised his hand, giving up on the task of trying to understand Yaten's words at all. Because they simply didn't make any sense, and he was simply too tired to put his brain into caring for such crazy talk.

Maybe Yaten had have a few more drinks than he should have, too.

.-.

From the corner of her eye she saw some guy taking Ami out for a dance, and she chuckled. Even in the general dimness, she was able to see the bluenette's burning cheeks.

No matter how much time passed and how old they all get, she could still see the cute bunch of sweet girls in them.

She shook her head, closing her eyes and following the music with her body, trying to catch up with the general relaxed, happy feeling all around her. They were out partying after all, celebrating her friend's birthday. So she moved and danced, listening to the beats and wanting to get lost in it, if only for a moment, and enjoy herself.

But she couldn't. No matter how much she tried, she just couldn't. She was too aware of one particular black haired young man by the bar, and him standing there was making her nervous. Like a magnet, her eyes would advert his way every few minutes, and his mere presence was making it impossible for her to relax.

She was just too conscious. Too sober. And for once in her life she seriously wanted to drink herself senseless.

She shook her head again, dismissing the thought. That was just not an option. So she went back to her dancing, once again trying to lose herself to the world. But when, from the corner of her eye, she saw that particular black haired guy talking to her Princess, and the both of them laughing at something, she just couldn't take it.

Usagi wasn't really giving any sign to encourage romantic pursuing. Mamoru was standing right there, next to them, and she knew, not even teenage Seiya would be that bold, getting so out of place and even embarrassing himself and Usagi in the process. He knew when to back away.

And so did she.

It hurt too much for her to stay.

Eight years ago, seeing him this infatuated with her Princess had annoyed her to no ends. And bothered her too, considering how Mamoru was missing back then. But now the Prince was right there, and that alone made things different, though it still bothered her. Not because she was jealous -though maybe there was a little bit of that too-, but because it hurt to know he was completely oblivious to what they had. To the love they shared.

He just didn't know, didn't remember. And he couldn't stand her.

It just hurt too much, and it was suffocating her.

Not wanting to worry anyone, to see that pitiful look in their eyes, she expertly let herself get lost in the mass of dancing bodies. Slowly getting away from the group. And when she was sure no one was looking her way or searching for her, she took off. Getting away from that place as fast as her feet and the dancing mass would allow her to.

Remembering to get her coat on the last minute, and not wanting to go back on her path and risking someone spotting her, she went for the back door, opening it up and stepping out, finding herself in the open parking lot. The door closed behind her, and she stood there for a moment, resting her coat over the railing and taking deep breaths, welcoming the cold night air now hitting her face. The now muffled music still reached her, but she blocked it away, concentrating only in her current task.

_Breathe_, she told herself. The cold, gentle wind easing the turbulence inside her, but not making it go away.

_Just breathe..._

She didn't know how long she stood there, with her eyes closed and taking easy, steady breaths. Her arms and hands were cold. Her nose was cold. And she could only guess her cheeks were getting red, with the wind hitting her face like that. But she didn't care. She was cold, and it didn't matter, because it somehow matched how she felt inside.

Numb.

"You should put that on," came a male voice she could recognize anywhere from behind her, and she straightened her back, getting tense all over again, not daring to turn around and look at him. "People usually do that to avoid freezing to death."

A soft, sad chuckled escaped her, and she shook her head. He almost sound as if he actually cared.

Almost.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, frustrated.

This was just her luck. She was desperately trying to get away from him, and the entire universe was mocking her. Was it really too much to ask? To be left alone?

"Taking some fresh air," came the easy answer. "What are _you _doing here, besides just standing there and freezing your ass off?" he asked back.

Stupid, moronic, know it all asshole. Damned freaking alien! He just had to be everywhere, didn't he? He just had to make her love him this much to then just... forget about her...

"Since when do you care?" she asked, unable to keep the frustration, the annoyance, the pain, and every single vibrating emotion ranging inside her off her voice.

Knowing he would take her tone and read all the wrong sings in it, knowing he didn't remember how to read her anymore, and simply not caring, she just took off. With fast, resolute strides, she just walked away, spotting her car a good twenty feet away.

"Hey, you're forgetting this!" he exclaimed behind her.

And she didn't need to turn around to know what he was talking about. Her cold arms and back were, by now, a painful remainder. But she honestly didn't care. She just wanted to get out of there, as far away from him as humanly possible.

She just kept on walking, determined, but a hand on her wrist forced her to stop, making her turn around and meet midnight blue eyes.

And she just had it.

"What do you want?" she asked, practically yelling at him.

He just blinked, raising his hands up in the air. One palm up, the other holding her sheepskin coat. Offering it to her.

Why did he absolutely had to be so goddamned chivalrous? And he was so close now; those deep, midnight blue eyes looking straight into her green ones. It was all so painfully tempting...

Taking the offered item, she turned back around, knowing she needed to get out of there before she could do something she knew she'd regret. She could feel the world dissolving all around her, and he was just so close, so near...

_To hell with it!_, she told herself, turning around once more and facing him. He probably thought she was drunk, anyway. So what did she had to lose, besides herself?

One last time.

She just wanted to feel him. To savor the taste of his lips, one last time.

And so, before the darkness could take her, she reached out her hand, placing it at the back of his neck and bringing him to her. Closing her eyes to enjoy the feeling, even if he didn't respond. A single tear falling down her cheek, she did the one thing she was dying to do.

She kissed him.


	11. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer: **All SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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><p>Of all things I believed in<br>I just wanna get it over with.  
>Tears form behind my eyes<br>but I do not cry,  
>counting the days that pass me by.<p>

I've been searching deep down in my soul.  
>Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old.<br>Feels like I'm starting all over again.  
>The last three years were just pretend.<br>And I say,

Goodbye to you.  
>Goodbye to everything I thought I knew.<br>You were the one that I loved.  
>The one thing that I tried to hold on to.<p>

I still get lost in your eyes.  
>And it seems that I can't live a day without you.<br>Closing my eyes, and you chase my thoughts away  
>to a place where I am blinded by the light,<br>but it's not right.  
>(…)<p>

And it hurts to want everything  
>and nothing at the same time.<br>I want what's yours and  
>I want what's mine.<br>I want you, but I'm not giving in this time.

Goodbye to you.  
>Goodbye to everything I thought I knew.<br>You were the one that I loved.  
>The one thing that I tried to hold on to.<p>

And when the stars fall I will lie awake.  
>You're my shooting star.<p>

**(Goodbye to you – Michelle Branch)**

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><p><strong>10<strong>

He froze on the spot. Eyes wide opened, he just stood there, in complete disbelief and utter shock at the feeling of her lips pressed against his.

Surprisingly, it wasn't a demanding kiss. It was soft. Tender, with a taste of sadness to it that confused him even more than the kiss itself.

Her lips were soft.

And as that one thought, that one realization hit him, he blinked, raising his hands up to push her away. But before he had the time to do so and rightfully ask what was wrong with her and why on earth would she ever do such a thing, her lips were already gone. Just as fast as it started, the kiss ended and he watched, almost in slow motion, as she opened her eyes half way, looking at his lips for a moment as if in complete fascination. A soft, whimpering moan reaching his ears at the same time as her green eyes rolled backwards.

He acted on reflex.

One hand going around her waist to keep her from falling to the floor, the other nesting her head so she wouldn't hurt her neck. Kneeling down himself, a deep frown came to his face as he contemplated the now unconscious blonde in his arms.

She was cold. And she looked pale, too. And for a moment there, he felt honestly lost; the taste of her lips still lingering on his, confusing him to no ends.

"What the..." came Yaten's worried voice right behind him, and he turned his face around just in time to see him hurriedly walking up to him. "What did you do?"

"Nothing!" he exclaimed, actually surprised at the implied accusation, and kind of insulted.

"What happened?" Yaten asked, as he picked up the forgotten coat laying on the floor, placing it over the unconscious blonde, trying to cover her arms and back as best as he could.

"I-I don't know," Seiya answered, honestly. "She just... passed out," he filled him in, leaving out the kissing part; he was still trying to wrap his mind around that little detail. "Guess she's really wasted..." he added, in a low voice.

That had to be it. That would explain her weird behavior.

Looking down on her, still unconscious in his arms, the frown came back to his face again. She didn't smell like alcohol, and there hadn't been any trace of it in her lips, either. In fact, she smelt kind of nice; a rich mix of gardenia and vanilla reaching his nostrils. It was kind of surprising, really, how soft that scent, that perfume was, and how it seemed to fit her so perfectly.

The sound of Yaten's hand on her cheek surprised him, and he looked up at him. Blue eyes going wide opened.

"Hey!" he exclaimed, taking Yaten's wrist in his hand and stopping it from slapping the blonde again. "What are you doing?"

"Waking her up," the silvery haired man answered. "Or do you want to stay here until she does on her own?" he then asked, letting out a sigh when Seiya simply blinked at him, easily freeing himself from the black haired man's grip and slapping the blonde again, though not hard enough to actually hurt her. "Haruka," he called out to her. "Haruka!"

A soft, kind of grumpy groan came from the woman in his arms, and Seiya looked down on her just in time to see green eyes slowly battling open. And then another groan, louder this time, as she reached up a hand, slowly, to rub her eyes.

"You ok?" Yaten asked, frowning worriedly.

"No," was the honest answer, as she kept her eyes closed for a while longer. But when the silvery haired man placed a hand under her, right over her bottom, she frowned, opening her eyes and looking at him. One blonde, questioning eyebrow going up. "What are you doing?" she asked, obviously not liking the invasion, but too weak to really do something about it, settling with just looking at him in a rather unfriendly way as she sought for refugee and support in Seiya's arms, placing her hands over his chest.

Instinctively, he tightened his grip around her shoulders, bringing her closer. His own eyebrow going up as well, as he looked at Yaten with the same questioning look Haruka had upon his own face.

Yaten's cheeks went slightly red at Haruka's tone and question, but he tried to shake it off. "Looking for your keys," he answered, shrinking his shoulders. "You're in no conditions to drive right now, so I'm taking you home," he offered in explanation.

"Wrong pocket," she grunted out, in a low, tired, kind of annoyed tone.

A rather deep blush came to Yaten's cheeks then, and he jerked his hand away, as the blonde took her keys out of the front pocket of her pants herself, handing them to the shorter man.

"Can you... help me get her to her car?" he then asked to Seiya, as he pointed at something behind them.

"I can walk," Haruka said, as she tried to sit up.

He noticed the way she blinked a few times, the faintest of a wince coming to her features for just a split of a second before she fought it off. But for some reason, he was able to see through her act, to read her face, her eyes. And he knew she was only putting up a mask, probably not wanting to seem weak in front of them. And he knew, if she had worded no objection at Yaten driving her car to take her home -a fact, he admitted, was highly surprising-, silently admitting not feeling well enough to be behind the steering wheel herself, then she certainly wasn't feeling well enough to be walking around on her own either.

She had just fainted, after all. And she was probably still feeling dizzy.

"Sure you can," he said, in disagreement to her statement, chuckling lightly at her.

She frowned at him, blinking. And though a part of his brain told him he should be annoyed at all the trouble she was putting him through right now, he couldn't help but think she looked kind of cute.

Placing one hand under her knees and the other on her back, he stood up, taking her up with him bridal style. He found her surprisingly light. Not that he had ever thought of her as heavy -not in the strictly physical way, at least-, but she was a rather tall woman, after all. But she was light, perfectly fitting in his arms, and not putting much of a fight at his movement.

Again, a surprise there.

But what surprised him the most was not the way she fit into his arms, or how she didn't voice any objections at being carried away like that. What surprised him was that blush coming to her cheeks, green eyes blinking at him, as he felt a hand going around his neck; long fingers hesitating only a moment, before coming in contact with his skin, right under his ponytail. Her other hand going to his chest, to give herself some sense of safety and balance as he carried her.

He found that red decorating her cheeks cute. The way she fit in his arms, the way it felt... good... to hold her like this, this close to him. The way her perfume reached him once again, invading his senses, and the way her green eyes looked at him only for a moment, before she looked away, cheeks turning a bit redder. It was all so surprising.

In a disturbing kind of way.

The sound of the car being unlocked forced him out of his own thoughts, and he nodded his head in appreciation when Yaten opened the passenger door for him to help the blonde in.

"You should get back inside, enjoy the rest of the night," Yaten said to him, opening the driver's door and resting his elbows on the roof. "Find Taiki, tell him I'm taking her home."

He nodded his head, as he helped her into the car. "Yeah, sure," he agreed, straightening up, resting a hand over the opened door as he looked at her.

She was sitting sideways, with her legs out and resting on the pavement, eyes closed and taking deep breaths. She certainly didn't look good at all. And he wondered if she was about to throw up now, as she weakly pushed him away, resting her elbows over her knees and her head in her hands.

"You ok?" he asked, knowing it was a stupid question, but feeling like he should at least ask.

A groan was all the answer he got, as she slowly straightened herself up, resting her back against the seat and closing her eyes.

"Ready to go?" Yaten asked, as he took a seat behind the wheel, turning to look at her.

Again, she groaned. "Motion sickness," she said, opening her eyes and looking at the shorter man, fully getting into the car. "Can't wait for that one."

"Want me to get you something?" Yaten asked, worriedly. "Some water, maybe?"

"No," she was fast to say, closing her eyes again and massaging her temples. "Just... I just want to go home," she added, in a low, husky whisper.

It was weird, seeing her like this. Weak, and vulnerable. It was so unlike her...

And she wasn't even trying to fight it off, to disguise it. And Seiya knew, because of that, because of how vulnerable, umbrageous, and even delicate she looked right now, he knew, she must been feeling really tired. Completely drained after passing out like that, and probably not fully recovered, still feeling dizzy.

Some dark, deep, delusional part of his brain told him he should stay with her. He should be the one driving her home, making sure she made it there safely. A part of him completely lost his mind for a second, creating this completely irrational need to stay with her, to hold her and tell her that, whatever it was that was bothering her, it was going to be alright.

And that surprised him as much as it scared him; he felt as if he was really losing his mind.

Able to shake himself off before doing anything, he stood there, blinking and frowning. The sound of the car coming alive distant for a moment, as he tried to get himself away from that insane line of thoughts and back to reality. He felt like growling, like hitting something; settling with just slamming the passenger's door closed, he gifted the car's roof with one strong smack and then stepped aside, as Yaten drove away.

And he stood there, watching the car disappear down the street and into the night. Welcoming the cold wind hitting his face, taking it as a reliable reality check to keep himself from having any more weird thoughts.

But after a moment, those thoughts were still lingering in his mind, and he knew, if his partying mood hadn't been ruined before, it surely was now. There was just no way he could get back inside and enjoy the rest of the night with all that nonsense in his head.

Glad that he got his jacket before stepping out of the nightclub, he fished for his cellphone, dialing Taiki's number. He might as well let him know that both Yaten and himself were off; he knew a worried Taiki would just be the last straw to his already weird enough night. And, well, he really didn't feel like being such an ass to the guy and let him worry to death for nothing.

"_Hello?_" came Taiki's voice from the other side of the line, muffled by the music and noise all around him.

"Yo, T," he greeted. "It's me."

"_Where are you? I've been looking for you all over,_" he said, sounding exasperated.

"I'm right outside. Listen, something came up," he was fast to say, before the tall brunette could even start giving him the lecture he knew it was probably coming his way. "Tenoh passed out, and Yaten took her home."

"_What? Is she alright?_"

Noticing the now worried tone in Taiki's voice, a frown came to his features. What was it with both Yaten and Taiki getting so worried over Tenoh all of a sudden? Even if by some cosmic joke they had all became friends now, she was definitively the kind of woman that knew how to take care of herself; it wasn't as if she needed any of them to look after her.

"She's fine. She just had one too many drinks, that's all," he offered, as he scratched the back of his neck.

He frowned at his own words. She really hadn't tasted like alcohol at all. But as the memory of her lips upon his assaulted his mind once more, he just shook the memory off, completely disregarding that line of thoughts altogether.

In fact, he wanted to get her out of his mind entirely.

"So, you know, Yaten offered to take her home," he continued. "I'm just letting you in."

"_Ok..._" Taiki said, still sounding both worried and confused.

"I'm tired... I think I'm calling a night, too," he then said, before his friend could say or ask anything else. He really was just tired, and the prospect of getting back home and just crawl into bed was starting to sound perfect.

"_Now? Um... ok, just let me get out..._"

"No, it's ok," he was fast to say, interrupting him.

Knowing Taiki was never one to get carried away, Seiya had been more than happy to let the tall man play the part of designated driver. Not that he was keen on getting completely wasted himself, or that he had particularly thought of doing that tonight. But considering he had just woken up from a comma, and a hit on his head had taken half of his life's memories, he wasn't risking it. So he had accepted Taiki's offer to just use the brunette's car, leaving his behind, safely parked at his place.

But just because he was without a car right now, and because he didn't really feel like getting back inside, didn't mean he was going to cut short Taiki's night as well.

"I'll get a cab or something," he said. "Don't worry."

"_Easy for you to say,_" Taiki mumbled into the phone, and Seiya wasn't really sure he heard right.

"What?"

"_Nothing,_" was the fast answer. "_Go to bed, get a good night rest. I'll call you in the morning._"

"Yeah, ok... bye."

He ended the call then, staring at his cellphone for a moment. No matter how much he wanted to forget the night's events, he couldn't stop wondering, what was it with everyone getting so worried over the blonde racer?

.-.

"You sure you're ok?" he asked, sending a sided glance towards her.

"Yeah..." was the low, almost weak answer, as she once again rested her head against the seat, closing her eyes and massaging her temples. "I'm just... really, really tired."

The raw honesty in her voice didn't escape him, and he frowned, turning his eyes back to the streets. He knew she looked pale; not even the dim streetlights could hide that. And he also knew there were bags under her eyes. Barely there, either if it was because they were small and just starting to form, or because she was disguising them with makeup, he couldn't be sure.

"When was the last time you had a good rest?" he asked, honestly worried.

"A month ago," she answered, again being brutally honest. "I'm fine, Yaten. Stop worrying so much," she said, turning her face around to look at him before he could even start forming a half decent sentence in his mind.

"You're _fine_?" he repeated, incredulous. "Then what was that, back there, huh?"

"An isolated little incident," she answered, shrinking her shoulders. "Guess it wasn't such a bad thing he was out there, after all..."

"I'm being serious here," he argued, easily picking up the ironic tone in her voice.

"So am I," she agreed. "Kissing the dirty with only God knows what pavement of that parking lot would've really made my night."

"You could have hurt yourself," he scolded, for a moment feeling like Taiki. But he knew someone had to lecture the blonde, and right now, he was the only one there. "And then freeze yourself to death... what were you thinking, getting out without your coat on?"

"I wasn't."

"Haruka..."

"I wasn't, ok?" she repeated, exasperated now. "And I'm sorry. I just needed to get out of there and then..."

She paused, sinking in her seat, and he frowned. Taking advantage of the red light, he turned to look at her. Arms crossed over her chest, face down, eyes tightly shot.

"Then what?"

She opened her eyes at his question, letting out a sigh. A sad, kind of mocking smile coming to her lips. "I did something _really_ stupid."

"You mean besides getting out in the middle of freaking december with nothing but a tank top?"

She chuckled at that; a rather sad, melancholic sound, as she turned her face back around to look into his lime green eyes. "I kissed him," she finally murmured.

"Oh boy..."


	12. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer:** I don't own SM. But I do own this story, so please don't steal it!

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><p>Kiss me. It's so weird,<br>you have the taste of something being wrong.  
>It's probably because for over a month now,<br>everything between us is mixed up.  
>And now it's as if I just met you.<br>You're so fresh,  
>you become a freeze the moment you arrive<p>

I'll tell you what we can do.  
>Let's love each other in secrecy,<br>being where no one else is at.  
>Let's make our love the deepest secret,<br>even if everybody's singing about it.  
>So what?<p>

You see, what happened between us,  
>even if I act like nothing, it's worrying me.<br>And at the same time, seeing you smiling...  
>your smile stands out among a thousand.<br>The pleasure of doing exactly the wrong thing.  
>The parody of happiness when opposing everyone else.<p>

I'll tell you what we can do.  
>Let's love each other in secrecy,<br>being where no one else is at.  
>Let's make our love the deepest secret,<br>even if everybody's singing about it.  
>So what?<br>They'll never know.  
>Let's be careful with what we do,<br>with who's in front of us.  
>It's just a matter of being careful,<br>and acting as if nothing's happening at all,  
>I'll ask you to run away with me<p>

**(Yo te diré – Miranda!)**

_I hate Miranda! with a passion. But I love this song!_

**.**

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><p><strong>11<strong>

"I just don't understand why we have to go there," Seiya complained, sitting down on the living room couch and letting out a grumbling sigh.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to," Taiki offered, lifting his eyes from the tea cup he was gently blowing on just enough to look at him and raise an eyebrow. "You can just stay at your place, or find something else to do."

"But it's Christmas!" he pointed out, frowning now.

He had come to Taiki's place to have a pizza night, just the three of them, though Seiya had arrived earlier than expected. Yaten had yet to come, and if he knew the shorter man at all, chances were, the silvery haired man was probably lost in his own world, camera in hand, taking shot after shot somewhere out there. He was working on a new project of his, which translated as, he was out hunting good photographs over half -if not all- of the time.

So there he was, killing time with his friend while they waited for Yaten, and just enjoying the tranquility of the dying day. That was, until Taiki told him about their Christmas plans. And though the prospect of enjoying one big, homemade turkey wasn't exactly an unpleasant one -he never really had the chance to have one before. Not that he could remember, anyway...-, it was the enjoying said turkey at the Outer's household bit that he wasn't particularly keen on.

Sure, his relationship with half of that quartet had improved considerably from what he remembered. Specially with Hotaru. And he could only hope maybe Setsuna didn't particularly despise him as much, considering she had never really voiced such feelings in the first place. Of course, one look her way was enough for the three of them to know the dark skinned woman had agreed with her companions.

The one that had voiced her despise and distrust towards him, quite a few times, was the one he seriously didn't want to spend the holidays with. Even if it was just a shared lunch for a few hours.

That woman was testing his sanity. And it bothered him that she did. But try as he may, he just couldn't get the ever haunting memory of her lips off his mind. He was even starting to dream about her!

Always looking different, wearing nothing but small, unbelievably sexy lingerie, and teasing the hell out of him as she moved and danced, ever so slowly and sensual. And he was sure it was absolutely impossible to put Tenoh and sensual in the same sentence. Yet that's how she looked in his dreams, in that flashing sequence of images that would whirl through his mind. So much so, that he would actually wake up with a start, his blood rushing through his veins, and aroused. The memory of her kiss, the still lingering taste of her lips only adding to his turmoil, and all he wanted to do was get back to completely ignoring she even existed. Forget that kiss, or the way she looked when dancing, both in his dreams and in that night club; forget about her tears and her sad green eyes, and the way he had felt like protecting her when she had looked so vulnerable the other night.

He just wanted to forget all about her, but he couldn't. It was as if she was always there, in some deep, dark corner of his mind, just waiting for the right moment to assault him again.

So, no, given the circumstances, he wasn't all that thrilled about spending Christmas anywhere near that woman.

"Isn't it supposed to be a time to spend with family and close friends and all that?" he grunted, in a low voice.

Taiki smiled at that, taking a sip from his tea. "Yes, indeed," he whispered back, before shaking his head and looking into his blue eyes again. "Like I said, you don't have to go if you don't want to. It's up to you."

"And spend Christmas alone?"

"If it helps making up your mind, the girls would be coming by later," the brunette offered, still smiling at him. "They have this tradition... always spending the afternoon together, eating whatever Mako comes up with, which is usually an awful lot of food, and exchanging gifts."

He frowned at that. "Right... about that... am I supposed to get presents for them?" he asked, knowing there was no need for him to specify who 'them' were.

"Considering they're inviting you into their house," Taiki said, now glaring at him, "I believe that would be the nice, polite thing to do, yes," he finished, taking a sip from his tea again, and then rolling his eyes when Seiya growled, letting his head fall to the resting back of the couch and staring up at the ceiling. "You really don't have to go..."

"I'll go," he growled out, looking at his tall friend again. "But I don't have the slightest idea of what to get them."

Again, Taiki smiled. "I'm sure you'd be able to figure something out."

The phone saved the tall brunette from getting a very colorful reply, and Seiya growled lowly again, leaning forward and resting his head on his hands.

Whoever it was on the other side of the line, it was obviously an important call Taiki needed to take, so he let out a sigh, letting his eyes wander around the room. Finding a pack of magazines, he picked one up, hoping it would help him kill some time while he waited for Taiki to be done with his phone call.

The first one was one of those cultural, highly boring magazines. The titles and headlines alone were enough to bore him to death, so he discarded that one in a heartbeat, taking the next one instead. A frown coming to his features when he realized it was what he called hair saloon magazines; not exactly the tabloid, gossiping kind, but still the kind with interviews and photo shoots and exclusives for the normal people to know about celebrities. Not that he had anything against that kind of publications; it was, after all, the kind he would normally grant an interview to. But it was surprising to find one in Taiki's pile of magazines.

Shaking a shoulder, he flicked through the pages, seeing if there was any article of his liking. There were quite a few 'celebrities' he didn't know of; others, he had come to know in the past few days, from movies and tv shows. But he had never been much into the celebrity fever, and he really didn't care all that much about other people's lives. So he kept on going through the pages, now in a more bored, less interested manner, until he came upon one picture that made his heart stop beating, taking all color off his face.

It was an ad.

A jeans ad, with him on it, wearing nothing but a pair of low rise blue jeans.

He was looking at the camera, with the slightest, sided smile playing on his lips, both charmingly and in secrecy, as he held one arm up and behind his head, as if running his fingers through his hair. His other hand was resting on the bottom of the woman next to him; thumb sneaking inside the back pocket of her own blue jeans, the other four fingers were clearly grabbing some meat there. And pressing her round, full, naked breasts to his equally naked chest, one hand hanging from the waist of his own jeans, as if she was trying to pull them down, face turned to him, eyes half closed and lips parted, just about to kiss or nibble his jawline, Haruka Tenoh stood with her back to the camera.

That enraptured look upon her face was enough to make him choke.

"Holy shit!"

.-.

He hang up the phone just in time to hear Seiya's curse, and he frowned. Stepping out of the kitchen he had ventured in during the call, he walked into the living room again. Making his way to his friend, one look at the magazine he was holding in his hands and stupidly staring at was enough to let him know why Seiya looked so shocked.

_This is not good..._, he told himself, frowning lightly.

She was definitively going to murder him. That was for sure.

But it wasn't really his fault if he had completely forgotten about that damned magazine he had got out of a stupid nostalgic moment in the first place. Somewhere in between the interviews and articles, there was a ranking on the most influential musical artists of the last ten years. The Three Lights were mentioned, and that was the one and only -stupid- reason he had got that one issue.

He wasn't even sure he had known about that ad being there before...

"What the hell is this?" Seiya asked, seemingly enraged all of a sudden, as he all but jumped off the couch.

Putting on his best uninterested, unaffected poker face, he looked at the magazine again for a moment, to then look at his friend. "An ad," he answered, shoving his hands into his pockets.

Blue eyes closed for a second, and Taiki knew Seiya was biting some colorful remark to his answer.

Taking a deep breath, Seiya opened his eyes again. "It's Tenoh," he said, in a low voice.

"I know."

"She's _naked,_" he said, again in a low, now kind of trembling, tone. And Taiki wasn't sure if it was out of surprise, or outrage.

"No, she's not," he argued. "She's wearing pants," he pointed out, deciding for once playing idiot was the best way to go right now.

Seiya blinked, looked at the ad again, and then blinked once more, looking back into purple eyes. "She's shoving her boobs at me!" he exclaimed, now clearly outraged.

"Last time I checked, that wasn't such a bad thing," Taiki teased, evilly amused at his friend's astonished face. "I mean, as guys, we're supposed to appreciate a nice pair, don't you think? And if you don't, then maybe..."

"It's _Tenoh_!" he exclaimed in a growling tone, interrupting him before he could finish that line.

This was priceless.

And he knew he should probably be ashamed of himself for acting like this, enjoying Seiya's utter surprise and disbelief. Somewhere on the back of his mind he registered the fact he was acting exactly the way Yaten would, and that he was probably signing his death sentence once Haruka found out about this. Seiya right behind her, making absolutely sure he really was as dead as one could get once he recovered his memory.

But Taiki really couldn't help himself.

"If I remember correctly, you got yourself a really nice check for that campaign," he said, shaking his shoulder. "And brand new jeans as a bonus. So I don't understand why you're complaining so much about it."

Blue eyes blinked at him once, before the annoyed frown came back to Seiya's features. "So what? Just because I got a few bucks out of it, suddenly it's ok for her to be all over me like that?"

"You got more than a few bucks," Taiki retorted. And then he smiled. "And you were all over her too, you know?" he added, teasingly. "There was this one picture with you cupping a field."

"What?" Seiya practically yelled, going pale for the split of a second, and then just going completely red.

The brunette chuckled. Yes, this was really priceless. And he wished he had that other version of the ad at hand; only imagining Seiya's face was making his day.

"Yes. She was turned around, facing up the camera with one arm up," he said, mimicking the pose and resting his forearm against his own chest, "covering herself. I guess you took up the job to cover the rest."

"Jesus!" the black haired singer exclaimed, shutting his eyes closed and throwing the magazine away; both hands going up to his face, covering his eyes for a moment, and then massaging his temples. "I'm surprised I'm still alive..." he then whispered, as a deep, disturbed frown came to his face.

Taiki chuckled at that.

A few years back, he would have wondered the exact same thing himself. In fact, he had, right after that yelling contest the two had at Rei's. With Seiya storming out of the place right after yelling his feelings out loud enough for people in Kathmandu to hear, Taiki had seriously wondered how his black haired friend had been able to just walk away like that without one specific blonde beating the lights out of him. And though later events and discoveries offered a perfectly reasonable explanation to that one, the never answered question of how they got there in the first place was still a puzzling mystery.

Along with, how come Haruka didn't murder him before ever getting to that point at all.

The doorbell saved him from having to answer to Seiya's last comment, and Taiki welcomed the distraction. There was a limit to how much he could mock Seiya -without him even knowing it-, and he was sure he had already gone well past that limit. But the look upon the black haired singer's face made it all so worth it.

He opened the door, and in walked Yaten; hands in his pockets, camera bag hanging from his shoulder, and a relaxed, content look upon his face that let Taiki know, whatever the silvery haired man was currently working on, he had have a good working day.

"Hi, guys. What's up?" he asked, as he walked in on the apartment. Noticing the still bewilder expression on Seiya's face, he frowned, looking back at Taiki for a moment. "What's with the long, idiotic face?"

Seiya growled, glaring at the shorter man, and Taiki simply chuckled, handing him the magazine and showing him the infamous ad. And a goofy, teasing smile came to Yaten's face then.

"Oh... I see I missed all the fun," he commented, amused.

Growling again, Seiya just shook his head, getting around the couch he was still standing in front of. "Can we order that pizza, now?" he asked, making his way into the kitchen in search of the cordless phone Taiki had left there.

"I'm guessing he majorly freaked out?" Yaten asked, looking back at Taiki. That goofy smile disappearing off his face, being replaced by a thoughtful, kind of worried frown instead. "She's gonna murder us, isn't she?"

Letting out a sigh at the last question, he reached up a hand, patting Yaten's back. "See you in the afterlife, buddy."

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><p><strong>A.N.:<strong> about the ad, think Calvin Klein ;)


	13. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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**12**

He shoved his hands into his pockets, admiring the view of the garden the wide window provided.

The house was big, and surprisingly nice and warm. He knew they considered themselves a family, but he never really thought they would actually act like one. Of course, he never really put that much thought into it in the first place. But as he saw Hotaru accommodating a few boxes and bags under the big Christmas tree, tastefully decorated with golden ribbons and ornaments, he could understand why the black haired teenager loved her parents so much.

Or anyone else, for that matter. They had been nothing but nice to him since he arrived. With honest, friendly smiles on their faces as they welcomed him in, and then got back to their previous tasks, as Michiru finished setting up the table, and Setsuna went into the kitchen again. And that turkey and whatever else she was making surely smelled delicious, and his stomach strongly approved of it already.

"Would you like some wine?" a soft voice from behind him asked, and he turned around to see Michiru holding a glass of red wine herself. "Bordeaux," she indicated, slightly raising her glass and smiling at him.

He raised his eyebrows, interested. He wasn't really lectured in wines -not that he could remember, anyway-, but he did know that was usually a good choice to go with.

"We also have Chardonnay," came Setsuna's voice, as the dark green haired woman walked into the dining room, placing a few empty glasses over the table. "Haruka is more of the white wine kind."

"I'll have red, thanks," he said, frowning slightly upon noticing that small exchange of glances between the two women at Setsuna's comment, and the concealed smile on Michiru's lips.

"Where is she, anyway?" Yaten asked, taking the task of pouring both himself and Seiya a glass of wine, soon handing it to him.

"Oh, she'll be here any moment," Michiru said, waving her hand.

As she said that, the sound of a car parking right outside their house reached them all, and Setsuna smiled. "That must be her," she said, making the way to the front door and opening it up, stepping outside.

"She spends every Christmas morning with her dad," Hotaru said, as she walked up to him and smiled. "You know, traditions..."

"Yeah..."

.-.

She didn't need to take a closer look to recognize the car parked right in front of the house. And knowing not only her luck, but also her friends, chances were, Taiki had brought one black haired singer along with him.

It was Christmas, for crying out loud. Couldn't they just give her a break? She had have a touchy morning with her father, and she was all sensitive and emotional enough already. She really didn't need any of this...

She sat there, tightly grabbing the wheel and seriously considering just hitting reverse, getting out of there. But the moment she saw Setsuna stepping out of the house and walking up to her car, she let out a frustrated sigh, killing the engine and opening the trunk.

_Too late_, she said to herself, stepping out of the car, and glaring up at her friend.

"If I told you he was coming," Setsuna started to say, raising up her hands, "you wouldn't have come."

"So you just tricked me," she accused, going to the trunk of her car and getting present bags out.

"He's standing right there," her olive skinned friend warned, and she risked a look into the house; blue eyes staring at her, as he rested a shoulder against the door frame. "Be nice."

She looked back at Setsuna at that, slightly narrowing her eyes for a second, before shoving a box into her. "Of course," she grunted, in a low voice. "Merry fucking Christmas."

"Merry Christmas to you too," the Guardian of Time said, smiling sweetly at her, not in the least offended. "Now, come on, I'll help you take these inside so we can..."

"Oh, Haruka!" came a female voice from the other side of the car, and both women turned around just in time to see Mrs. Fujioka, the next door neighbor, making her way up to them. "How nice to see you, dear."

"Oh, hi, Mrs. Fujioka," she greeted, slightly vowing her head towards the old lady in respect. "Merry Christmas."

"And Merry Christmas to you too, dear," the old lady greeted back, smiling and tilting her head up just to look at the blonde. "I feel like I haven't seen you in ages! How is that boyfriend of yours doing?" she asked, in that sweet, caring tone of hers; though on that moment, it made Haruka's heart stop dead in her chest. "I hear he's..."

"Mrs. Fujioka!" Setsuna interrupted, before anything else could be said. "You know about gardening, right?" she asked, giving the box the blonde had previously shoved into her back to the racer, and gently but strongly taking the old lady's arm. "I think I may have made a mistake with the daffodil bulbs I planted..." she explained, making up a story or actually telling the truth, Haruka wasn't sure.

She took a deep breath. All annoyance and half anger towards Setsuna dissipating as she watched her tall olive skinned friend guiding Mrs. Fujioka away. Holding the box to her chest, and taking a few more bags with her free hand, she closed her car's trunk, turning back around, only to find one black haired man making his way up to her.

"Need a hand?" he asked, pointing at the bags and boxes in her hands.

"No, I'm fine," she said, trying to walk past him. But his next words stopped her dead in her tracks.

"Did I really just hear that? You have a _boyfriend_?"

It was amazing how she could go from loving the guy, to deeply and passionately hating his guts. And right now, she really wanted to punch him and wipe that stupid smile off his face. But deciding that getting violent and ruining the day for everyone was the completely wrong way to go, she just looked at him, head held high, just waiting for whatever comment he was just about to make.

"Really?" he asked, as that amused, sided smile of his came rushing to his lips. "Holy... who is this guy? I have to meet him!"

She could literally feel the knife going straight to her heart. And then turning around just for the fun of it. And it took all of her will power to keep on the mask over her face and just look at him.

"He's not here," she said, moving aside to get into the house already.

"Hey... hey!" he exclaimed, trying to stop her, and then raising up his hands in a surrendering manner when she turned around and glared at him. "I'm not trying to be mean, here. I swear," he assured her, now offering her a more genuine smile. "Christmas spirit and all that."

"Good."

"I just... I gotta meet this guy," he insisted, chuckling lightly and walking up to her again.

"I told you, he's not here," she said again, finding it harder to look into his eyes now. "He's… not available right now."

"Ok, when would he be available?"

.-.

"I don't know," was the barely whispered answer he got from her, before she hurriedly made her way into the house.

He stood there, frowning. Though only for a second, before she lowered her gaze and looked away, he had been able to see the flash of sadness going through green eyes as she said that.

Connecting the dots, he wondered if maybe this mysterious boyfriend of hers was the reason behind her tears. He wondered if maybe she was having some sort of relationship problems, if maybe things weren't working out or something. It sounded kind of awkward, to associate her strange behavior and her tears to matters of the heart; she always seemed like such a tough girl. But he knew love and hate were basically two opposite sides of the same feeling, so if she loved with the same passion and commitment as she hated, then... well, whoever this guy was, he should feel lucky to have someone loving him so strongly.

Shaking his head and just putting it all aside, he walked back into the house. Whether she was having problems with this boyfriend of hers or not, it wasn't any of his business. And she surely wouldn't appreciate him getting his nose in her private life.

He walked in just as Hotaru jumped up to her papa like a five year old, squealing happily only for the tall blonde to glare at her and scold her.

"Not now," she said, in a reprimanding, yet somehow still caring tone. "You know that."

"Aw, come on!" Hotaru complained, hitting the floor with one foot. "I already know what you got me," she bluffed.

"Then it's not gonna hurt to wait a bit longer," the blonde simply said, placing the presents under the tree. "No peeking."

"We always have to hide presents from her," Michiru lowly said, as she walked to stand right next to him. "She just can't wait..."

He chuckled at that, shoving his hands into his pockets and watching the now pouting teenager.

"If you let her, she'd even look into everybody's presents," the violinist continued, with a loving, amused smile on her face. "You'd think she grew out of that when she turned thirteen..."

"Perhaps you guys spoiled her too much," he ventured, smiling, as he turned to look at the aquamarine woman. "Dotting her a little too much, maybe."

"Hey!" Michiru complained, frowning, and hitting his arm. But she soon smiled again, giggling softly. "Maybe," she added, in a low, amused whisper, before taking a sip from her wine.

"Ok!" came Setsuna's voice, as the dark green haired woman walked back into the house again after disappearing for a while. "All set. If you would please take a seat, now," she indicated, pointing at the table and smiling, as she made her way into the kitchen.

He walked to the table and grabbed the chair Hotaru pointed to him, right next to her. Yaten took the seat to his left, and Taiki right across the table from the silvery haired man, as both Haruka and Michiru went into the kitchen to help bringing the food to the table.

Just by looking at the dishes, the menu for the day made Seiya's mouth watered. Stilton stuffed mushrooms with cranberry relish as starters, sautéed potatoes with lemon and rosemary, Brussels sprouts gratin with bacon and cream, and then the main attraction, the roasted turkey with bread sauce Setsuna carefully placed in the center of the table.

"Would you do the honors?" she asked, handing the carving knife to Taiki.

The tall brunette accepted the offered knife, and Seiya couldn't help the smile coming to his lips; it was his very first Christmas on earth that he could remember, and he was already enjoying it, with such delicious food right in front of him. A look around the table told him everyone else was enjoying the occasion just as much.

He saw the tall blonde closing her eyes as she sniffed the Brussels sprouts she still held in her hands; a satisfied smile coming to her lips. "I swear, Sets, you outdo yourself every year," she said, approvingly.

One green eyebrow went up at that. "Why? Did my cooking skills not reach your high expectations before?" she asked, teasingly.

"It was a compliment, woman," the blonde complained, rolling her eyes. "Just take it."

"Well, thank you," Setsuna said, smiling, and slightly nodding her head towards the tall woman.

Haruka smiled to her friend at that; a kind of mocking smile. "See? That wasn't hard, was it?" she teased, as she sat down right across from Hotaru, next to Michiru and the olive skinned woman, who took the seat at the end of the table.

He watched the exchange between the two, curiously. The tone in Tenoh's voice was mocking, maybe even a little bit mean, but so was Setsuna's. And by the small smiles on their faces and everyone's overall attitude, it seemed obvious this mocking and teasing each other little display was a normal occurrence in the Outers' household. And it was in little things like that, in the way they moved around each other with ease and naturalness, how they talked and laughed, that let him see they truly were a family, even if blood said differently.

A small, very unique family of four that had opened up their home for the three Starlights to spend the holidays with.

It was heartwarming, really. Even if Tenoh was in the picture.

But looking at her now, as the tall blonde smiled and winked to the teenage girl sitting next to him in such a playful, tender gesture, making Hotaru giggle happily in return, she didn't really seem that bad. Maybe if he could see this caring, teasing, more talkative side of her instead of the aggressive, sharp regular one, he could grow to somewhat like her, and maybe even patch things up with her. Of course, in order to do that, she would have to at least tolerate him, too. And he did promised both Taiki and Yaten he would behave that day, being all nice and friendly to the racer, not picking up a fight or making any comment of a rather unfriendly nature that could ruin the holiday for everyone.

To keep his promise, and with the idea of getting into more friendly ground with the tall woman in mind, he took the bottle of wine, first refilling Setsuna's glass, and then he looked into green eyes, smiling gently.

"Wine?" he offered.

She frowned. "No," she said, covering her empty glass with her hand to stop him from filling it. "I'm driving."

He frowned at that, not really understanding her answer. But before he could ask, Michiru beat him to it.

"We're going to a play later," she said, in explanation. "And someone has to drive us there," she added, tilting her head towards the blonde and smiling.

"On Christmas?" he asked, curious now.

"Oh, yes," Setsuna said, nodding her head and smiling. "There's this small theater company that puts up a street play on Juuban Park every year. They perform for tip, and whatever money they come up with, they donate it to the local orphanage," she explained further. "There's usually not much to do on Christmas day. Open presents in the morning…"

"If you're lucky," Hotaru interrupted, glaring at the olive skinned woman and pouting cutely.

"Lunch with family, and then maybe visit some friends in the afternoon," Setsuna continued, unaffected. "The play starts late afternoon, when people already ate all they can eat for one day and are left with nothing to do except maybe eat some more..."

He chuckled, nodding his head. "I see. Sounds interesting."

"They cast kids from the orphanage to perform all the main roles," Taiki continued, nodding his head. "Last year they played Wizard of Oz, and it was actually pretty good."

He raised both eyebrows at that, a bit surprised. "So we... go too?" he asked, vaguely pointing at himself and his brothers, curiously.

"Of course," Taiki answered, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"That was the most adorable Wicked Witch I've ever seen," Michiru said, smiling.

"She was really cute," the blonde racer agreed, smiling softly too, and nodding her head in agreement. "Not really that wicked, though," she added, chuckling lightly.

"Delicious lunch, gift exchange, and then enjoying a play at the park," Seiya counted, smiling too. "That's the Christmas agenda, then."

Hotaru turned to look at him, tilting her head to a side and smiling. "It's tradition."


	14. Chapter 13

**Disclamer: **SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. I only own this story. Please don't steal

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><p>I can't sleep.<br>Everything I ever knew  
>is a lie<br>without you.  
>I can't breathe<br>when my heart is broke in two.  
>There's no beat<br>without you.

You're not gone, but you're not here.  
>At least that's the way it seems tonight.<br>If we could try to end these wars,  
>I know that we can make it right.<br>'Cause baby...

I don't wanna fight no more,  
>I forgot what we were fighting for.<br>And this loneliness that's in my heart  
>won't let me be apart from you.<br>I don't wanna have to try  
>girl, to live without you in my life,<br>so I'm hoping we can start tonight.  
>'Cause I don't wanna fight no more.<p>

How can I leave,  
>when everything that I adore<br>and everything I'm living for  
>girl, it's in you.<br>I can't dream.  
>Sleepless night have got me bad.<br>The only dream I ever had  
>is being with you.<p>

I know that we can make it right,  
>it's gonna take a little time.<br>Let's not leave ourselves with no way out,  
>let's not cross that line.<p>

[...]

Remember that I made a vow,  
>that I would never let you go.<br>I meant it then, I mean it now,  
>and I wanna tell you so.<p>

I don't wanna fight no more,  
>I forgot what we were fighting for.<br>And this loneliness that's in my heart  
>won't let me be apart from you.<br>I don't wanna have to try  
>girl, to live without you in my life,<br>so I'm hoping we can start tonight.  
>'Cause I don't wanna fight no more.<p>

**(I don't wanna fight no more - Westlife)**

* * *

><p><strong>13<strong>

"Wow," Taiki mumbled, as he contemplated the vintage sterling silver fountain pen he held in his hand. "This is beautiful," he said, looking up to his friend. "Thank you."

Seiya shook one shoulder. "I know writers don't really use those anymore," he said, as his sided smile came to his lips, "but I also know how old fashioned you are," he teased, as everyone else around laughed, while Taiki simply glared at him. "And any decent writer should have one of those, so... I figured you'd like it."

"I do," the brunette said, nodding his head. "Very much. Thanks, man."

She looked at them from her position, curled up over the couch, legs bent up, and a small smile made it to her lips. He was always so thoughtful when it came to gifting.

The girls and Mamoru showed up around an hour ago, and they were all sitting by the fireplace, spread around the couches and pillows, opening and exchanging gifts, sharing some good laughs. And he was sitting right across from her, coffee table in between, casually sitting on the carpet floor and resting his elbows over his bent up knees, smiling and joking around with everyone.

This has proven to be the hardest, weirdest, most painful Christmas she could remember. With him right there, smiling and being all nice; it somehow made it worst. Harder.

When he was being rude, making comments and glaring down at her, being the idiot, immature guy she used to hate, it was easier for her to deal with everything. With him gone. Because no matter how much words would hurt, she could always tell herself he didn't know, he didn't remember. For him, nothing ever happened, and he was acting according to what he knew.

But with him being like this, all nice and friendly... she didn't know how to respond to that. She didn't know how to react.

And so she found herself holding herself back, constantly. He had never been the easy to ignore kind of guy, but with him being everything but his charming, relaxed, easy going self towards and around her, it was easier to hold back and just look the other way. It hurt, but it was so much easier than being in the same room with friendly, smiling Seiya.

Because he was that kind of guy; charming, funny, bighearted, caring. And simply magnetic. The kind that would bring a smile to someone's face just by looking at him smiling. The kind that would make her heart stop, with just that smile. The one that made her want to reach out her hand and take his; run her fingers through his hair, brush her fingertips around his nape just to get that one smile out of him again. That soft, small, sided smile that would brighten up his deep blue eyes.

"No problem," she heard his voice again, and she looked up just in time to see him taking a small package, and then looking up to her. "This is for you," he said, with a rather shy smile on his lips, as he offered her the wrapped up, rectangular gift.

Straightening her back up, she blinked, sincerely surprised, as she glanced at the offered gift. Feeling more than seeing all eyes on her, with surprisingly steady fingers, she took the small packaged and opened it, ripping the red paper off. And she blinked again, looking up into midnight blue eyes just in time to see him looking back at her, that half sided, half embarrassed smile of his playing on his lips as he scratched the back of his neck.

"I hope you like it," he mumbled.

She nodded her head, absently, looking down at her present. _'Open your mind and you'll see, you already know how to fly; you just need to spread your wings'_, said a hand written dedication on the first, yellowish page of the book she now held in her hands.

-.-

He watched her, studying her reaction, trying to figure out if she liked the gift or not. She was staring at it, reading that dedication someone had written on it, years ago.

He hadn't planned on gifting her that book. In fact, he had absolutely no idea of what to get to her as a Christmas present. He didn't really know her that much, and anything he could think of was either too impersonal, or just off. But he had came across that old book while waiting for the old man to wrap Taiki's present, in that old shop that seemed like a gate to another time and place, filled with antic pocket watches and vases, and hats and writing desks. And old, used books, piled up over an old table against a wall. And while waiting for the old man and taking a look around the place, he had found the book, and upon opening it, the words written in there, for some reason, made him think of her.

They seemed to fit her, and he figured, out of anyone else, she'd be able to understand the words. And, maybe she would also like the book, even if it was an old copy, instead of a brand new one.

But now it seemed like a rather lame gift, and a really stupid idea to give it to her. "I know it's silly..." he started to say, to apologize.

"How did you know?" she asked, looking up at him.

He frowned. "Know what?" he asked back, confused.

"Jonathan Livingstone Seagull," Michiru said, reading the title, and smiling up to him. "It's her favorite book."

"Oh..." he mumbled, blinking.

The look in her eyes, as if she was searching... something... That same sadness he had seen in those green orbs earlier that day, filling her eyes again as she looked at him. As if waiting for him to give her some kind of answer to a question she hadn't asked.

It was kind of disturbing. It made him uncomfortable, just as much as it intrigued him. It made him wonder, not for the first time, what was it about her that seemed so different. Intriguing, alluring, and as unreachable and unreadable as always.

And her eyes... there was something in her eyes. Something deep, silent. Latent and waiting. And just so confusing.

He shook his head, clearing his mind. "I... I didn't know," he said, frowning lightly now. "I'm sorry, I'm sure you already have a copy..."

"No," the blonde said, shaking her head, as she closed the book and held it to her chest. "It's perfect."

"Yeah, the copy she has can now take a retirement," Hotaru teased, giggling, and successfully breaking the suddenly heavy, kind of emotional mood that had fallen over the living room, as everyone around laughed along with the teenage girl.

"Yeah..." the blonde chuckled, taking her bangs out of her eyes and lowering her gaze for a moment, whether if it was in embarrassment or not, he couldn't tell, before looking up into his eyes again. "Thank you," she said, in a low, husky yet soft tone. "I'm sorry I didn't get you anything..." she apologized, now glaring at the innocently looking Setsuna, as the dark green haired woman took a sip from her tea, smiling unaffected, "I didn't know you guys were coming."

"It's ok, don't worry," he assured her, shaking his shoulder. "I'm the one coming into your house for the holidays," he said, now looking at Setsuna and Michiru, smiling to them all, "so thank you for having me."

"You're very welcome," Setsuna said, smiling at him.

"My turn!" Minako exclaimed, breaking the tranquil atmosphere and jumping in her seat, as she took a gift from under the tree. "Hey, Rei, catch!" she exclaimed, throwing the box into the air, across the coffee, as the Miko girl caught it right on before it could hit the glasses resting there and ruin the carpets.

He chuckled at the blonde's antics, and then smiled at Rei's big, bright smile as she opened her present. Soon everyone else joined in, getting back to exchanging gifts and jokes alike as the ripped wrapping papers around them kept on growing in volume.

His eyes traveled to the silent, tall blonde woman curled up over the couch. Face half hidden under the turtleneck of her teal sweater, covering her chin as she held it there with one hand. The other resting over her bent up legs; long fingers brushing against the covers of her book as she looked at it, with the smallest, faintest of smiles playing on her lips. She looked deep in thought, lost in her own little world, and he wondered what she was thinking of. If maybe she was thinking of that mysterious boyfriend of hers.

He frowned. He really wanted to know this guy, to meet whoever had the guts not only to date her, but to court her in the first place. She could easily beat the daylights out of anybody, with a nose and a few bones getting broken in the process, and the fact that this guy had dared to even flirt with her... the guy had balls, that was for sure.

But he wasn't sure he liked the idea of her dating some guy. It changed things.

It changed everything.

It forced him to look at her in a different light, to see a completely different side to the heartless butch he always thought her to be. A side he had started to see glimpses of when he saw her crying. Or the other night, when he saw her moving to the music on that dance floor, in a way he never thought possible of her, all sensual and magnetic, though subtle at the same time; all legs and arms and -he gulped- curves. A side he had heard of, by Hotaru or Usagi and the rest of the girls, who unconditionally loved the racer for reasons and treats attributed to her that he just never saw in her before.

A side that was now showing him those reasons, and how true they were. Because, though strong and certainly dangerous, she was also caring. Soft, even, with a heart she zealously kept away from the world, for only those she cared for to see and know about. She was fun and easy to be around -when she was not threatening with biting his head off, of course-; with a bit of a wild nature and a free spirit, judging not only by her past relationship with Michiru, but also by her career. Just now, with this new side of her out in the light for him to see, he realized, she was an intriguing woman of many faces.

And as he sat there, looking at that soft, small smile of hers decorating her features, and how her blonde bangs fell over her green eyes, he wondered, how many sides there where? What else about Haruka Tenoh he didn't know of?

.-.

She was the first to step out, excusing herself by saying she needed to start the car and warm the engine, while making room on the backseat, taking the gifts her father had showered her with into the trunk. Which wasn't a complete lie, but it wasn't the truth either.

She just needed some air.

She just couldn't take it anymore. Being away from him was so much easier when he was acting like a stupid teenager. But forcing herself to stay away from him when he was all smiles, distancing himself from the boy she had first met with every passing minute and resembling more and more the guy she had fallen in love with... she just couldn't do it. She kept catching herself looking his way, and she really didn't want him to catch her doing so.

The last thing she needed was him finding out about, well, everything, in the completely wrong way.

She didn't even know which was the right way. But with everyone around, staring at them, with the very real possibility of Seiya going ballistic at the news, completely ruining the holidays for everyone was definitely not it. And she just wasn't ready to face him yet. Specially not today.

Being in the same room with him was suffocating. And when she stepped outside and the winter wind hit her face, blowing against her warm cheeks and making her short hair dance around in her head, she welcomed it. And she stood there for a moment, taking deep breaths, bathing in the fresh, cold air, hoping for the cold wind to cool down the turmoil inside her.

Raising a hand and massaging her temples, she stepped away from the doorway, walking up to her car. They were just about to go to the play at the park, and she really did need to make room for Setsuna and Hotaru. And she also needed to hide one small gift her father had given her that was meant for one specific singer.

But as she approached her car, a movement on the bushes right behind her made her frown. She heard fast footsteps reaching her, and the wind suddenly wrestling in her ears alerted her. Instincts kicking in, she was able to move to a side and dodge the upcoming hit to her head just in time, turning around and facing the boy who couldn't be older than nineteen, waving a baseball bat in his hand and sending a menacing, threatening look her way.

"We don't wanna hurt you, blondie," said a voice behind her, and from the corner of her eye she saw a second guy now walking around her car and approaching her as well. "Just give us the keys."

She frowned, suddenly getting royally pissed off; as if her day wasn't bad enough already, now some teenager bad guys wannabe wanted to high jack her car?

They were not armed, and she knew it. They would have shown it to her already if they were. And they didn't look particularly strong; she could take them down easily. But as every single fiber, every muscle in her body tensed up, ready to defend herself, every single cell in her brain screamed at her the reasons why she shouldn't engage into a fight.

_Damn it!_

.-.

He was seeing things.

Yes, that had to be it. There was no soft, friendlier side to her. She was just playing nice and keeping quiet for the sake of Christmas spirit. Hotaru or Michiru had probably asked her to be nice, just like Taiki and Yaten did with him, and everything would be going back to square one after the holidays.

And really, what reasons did he have to really think there was a softer, nicer side to her? What reasons did she have to be nice to him? They had friends in common, and he was willing to take a deep breath and be civil. But the truth was he really couldn't find one valid reason to try and be friends with her.

Except for that strange feeling... that something that lured him to her, every time. He didn't know how long it has been there, or when did it first started. He wanted to blame it all on that kiss, but he knew that was not quite right. The memory of her lips still haunted him, yes, but it was the memory of her tears that really troubled him. Her tears, and that feeling he first got from her back at Makoto's place, as if her energy, her aura had changed somehow from what he remembered, and it had triggered something in him. As if a memory of something wanted to come up, and that nostalgia he was left with after being unable to recall his own dreams had made his mind somehow add her to those strange flashes -that may or may not be actual memories- he kept on having. Because her face, her voice hadn't been there when those flashes first started, he knew, her tears had somehow reminded him of... whoever the woman in lingerie was.

He was losing his mind. That was for sure.

Shaking his head, he made his way to the door. The ladies were still cleaning up, taking empty glasses and leftovers to the kitchen, and though he should probably help them out -or at least offer to-, he figured, there were many helping hands already. And there were still a good few minutes to go before they would all get ready to head out to that play, but he just needed some fresh air to try to clear his mind.

Taking only his jacket and not bothering with the gifts, knowing he could go back inside and get them when it was finally time to go, he stepped out, smiling upon the cold air meeting his face. But the smile disappeared in a matter of seconds upon the scene waiting for him there.

.-.

The bat swung her way, and she dodge it easily, stretching her leg out in a kick an meeting soft flesh, forcing the boy down to the ground, and then kicking the bat out of reach. Turning around, she was fast to stop the punch the second guy threw at her with her hand, delivering a punch herself with the other one, right in the face. A satisfied frown coming to her face as the guy stumbled backwards, nursing his now bleeding nose.

"Fucking bitch!" he exclaimed, growling at her. "You broke my nose!"

"Hey! What's going on here?"

A shiver ran through her spine at the voice.

If there was anything, anything at all she absolutely knew about him, was his knight in shiny armour tendencies. And she knew, he really, really shouldn't get into a fight right now. Not when there was a bat somewhere around; he had just woken up from a coma, with a broken leg that had just healed, and bruised all over. She didn't want him getting hurt again.

She turned around just in time to see the boy jumping up again, ready to face the newcomer, just as Seiya approached them. That set frown she knew all too well coming to his features as he studied the boy's movements; dodging the punch coming his way just in time, tucking the boy's hand under his arm and then delivering a punch himself.

And as the boy growled out, bending over in pain, she was barely able to duck a hit herself; the guy's fist inches away from her face, as she lost her balance and stumbled backwards.

And she grunted. With Seiya suddenly getting into the fight she got distracted, giving the advantage to her opponent.

Everything happened too fast.

She stopped a second fist with her own hand as the alarmed voices of Taiki and Setsuna told her they had stepped out of the house, surely alerted by the noise, and a painful grunt reached her ears. She didn't need to turn around to know, the boy had somehow managed to hit Seiya, and as she readied herself to gift the guy with another strong punch on his already sore, bleeding nose, she heard the wind agitatedly wrestling against her again, alerting her.

Green eyes going wide opened upon the hit. She saw white, barely able to let out a chocked, painful gasp. Shaking hands flying to her abdomen, her legs trembled, and she fell to the floor, down on her knees.

.-.

"Hey!" Taiki yelled, running up to Seiya, just as the kid managed to free himself from the singer's grasp, hitting his face with his elbow and making Seiya stumbled back.

At the sound of his voice, the boy took out running, and he knew better than to go after him; street robbers were used to running away, and right now, Seiya's broken, bleeding lip worried him more. But as he reached the singer, taking him by his arm and making sure it really was only a broken lip, a chocked sound reached his ears, and he turned around.

His eyes going wide opened and all blood leaving his face as he saw her falling down to her knees, hands on her stomach, and yet another chocked gasp.

"Fucking bitch!" the guy who had just punched her growled out, wiping the blood that kept on coming off his nose, before turning around and taking off, disappearing fast.

"Haruka!" Setsuna exclaimed, flying to the blonde, kneeling down next to her with a worried expression all over her face. "Haruka! Are you alright?"

Placing one shaking hand on the snowed grass, the blonde tried to straighten up, only to let out a whimper, folding herself back on hand and knees again and trembling.

"What's going on?" was Rei's worried voice, as everyone else came rushing through the door to see what was all the ruckus about.

"Haruka!" Michiru exclaimed, worriedly, running to the blonde. "Are you ok? Can you stand up?" she asked, frowning worriedly up to him when the only answer she got was yet another whimper.

"What happened?" Taiki practically growled, now turning back to look at a blinking Seiya, as he nursed his bleeding lip.

"I-I don't know," he mumbled, blinking once more, before a frown came to his face as he looked at the blonde.

"Haruka..." Michiru called out to her, softly, cupping the blonde's pale face in her hands, and frowning. "Are you alright?"

The blonde winced, tightening her jaw for a moment, before letting out a gasp. Green eyes filling with tears. "God... it hurts..." she chocked out.

His blood froze as he saw the racer; her face was incredibly pale, and she looked as if she was just about to pass out.

_This can't be good_, he told himself, worriedly.

"She ok?" Seiya asked, wiping the blood off his lips, and taking a step forward.

But Taiki stopped him, placing one strong hand on his chest. "You've done enough."

"What? I didn't do anything!" he defended himself.

"She's not supposed to be fighting!" Taiki growled at him. "And neither are you!"

"Help me get her to the car," Setsuna said, taking Haruka's arm around her own shoulders and trying to help her up, as she looked up at Yaten, who was by now standing right next to them. "Hospital. Now," she said, as the only, resolute explanation when green eyes blinked up at her.

Yaten was fast to help, going to the blonde's side and helping the olive skinned woman, as Michiru unlocked the car, getting into the driver's seat.

"I'm going with you," he said, walking up to the car too.

"What?" Seiya's voice made him turned around. "Come on, I've seen her taking blows way harder than that."

But again, Taiki stopped him before he could get anywhere near the car. "You better pray she's ok," he warned him. "Because, trust me, if anything happens to her, you'll hate yourself for the rest of your life."

"What?" the singer asked, blinking both in confusion and in anger.

"She's pregnant, you idiot."

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><p><strong>Next on "Remember me?":<strong> "I'm on the freaking pill. I'm not supposed to _be_ late. That's the whole point!"

A little flashback!

Meanwhile, any thoughts? XD


	15. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please do not steal!

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><p>How can I just let you walk away,<br>just let you leave without a trace,  
>when I'm standing taking every breath with you?<br>You're the only one who really knew me at all.

How can you just walk away from me,  
>when all I can do is watch you leave?<br>'Cos we've shared the laughter and the pain  
>and even shared the tears.<br>You're the only one who really knew me at all.

So take a look at me now.  
>There's just an empty space.<br>And there's nothing left here to remind me,  
>just the memory of your face.<br>Oh, take a look at me now.  
>Well there's just an empty space.<br>And you coming back to me is against the odds  
>and that's what I've got to face.<p>

I wish I could just make you turn around.  
>Turn around and see me cry.<br>There's so much I need to say to you,  
>so many reasons why<br>you're the only one who really knew me at all.

So take a look at me now.  
>There's just an empty space.<br>And there's nothing left here to remind me,  
>just the memory of your face.<br>Now take a look at me now.  
>Well there's just an empty space.<br>But to wait for you is all I can do,  
>and that's what I've got to face.<br>Take a good look at me now,  
>'cos I'll still be standing here.<br>And you coming back to me is against all odds,  
>it's a chance I've gotta take.<p>

Take a look at me now.

**(Against all odds - Phill Collins)**

* * *

><p><strong>14<strong>

"She's pregnant, you idiot," Taiki growled, pushing him aside and then turning around, getting into Haruka's car and closing the door, as Michiru hit reverse and the car soon took down the street, fast.

He blinked, surprised out of his mind.

"She's pregnant?" Minako asked, blinking in surprise at the news, echoing the question in his mind.

"Sets," Mamoru's voice made him turn around, as he saw the tall black haired guy talking into his cell phone. "Take her to Tokyo's Memorial. I'm on my way."

"Did you know about this?" Usagi asked to him, looking quiet hurt at being kept in the dark.

"No," he answered trustfully, ending the call and taking his car keys out of his pocket. "But now I know why she was 'lost' on the third floor a few weeks ago," he said, accentuating the word 'lost' and shaking his head.

"Maternity floor, I assume," Rei said, in a half questioning tone, as she all but jumped to Makoto's car when the tall brunette moved to get in, ready to follow them.

"Yeah," Mamoru answered, nodding his head and opening the door to get into his own car. But before getting in, he turned to him. "Are you coming?"

He blinked again, frowning at the earthen Prince. His mouth opening and closing, but no word coming out. Everything was a blur, and he felt more lost than ever before in his life.

"Come on," Ami said to him, gently placing a hand on his arm and smiling up to him. "I can check that out for you," she then added, pointing at his still bleeding lip.

He frowned at her words, raising a hand up to his bruised lip. "It's nothing," he mumbled, shaking his head, before looking up at Mamoru and Usagi, as they waited for him to get in their car. "I... I'm not sure I should..."

Too many things happened, too fast for him to catch up. First, all those strange thoughts about Tenoh invading his mind, his dreams, driving him crazy; the never fading memory of her kiss and her tears only adding to the equation. And then when walking outside just to take some fresh air, seeing those two guys trying to take her down, probably trying to robe her or something, had waken something up in him.

Even though he knew she was more than strong enough to defend herself, seeing her cornered like that had triggered something in him. A need... that same need to protect her, to make sure she was alright, to be with her, that assaulted him that night, when she fainted in his arms.

"_I missed you, Space Boy,"_ he heard her voice, clear and loud, in his mind. Teasing, low and husky, with an endearing edge to it.

He shook his head, frowning again.

Usagi smiled. "Come on," she said, softly, walking up to him and taking his hand.

Numbly, he nodded his head, letting the petite woman guide him. And he just sat there, staring out the window and frowning, as he tried to make some sense out of all the voices suddenly screaming, talking, laughing, whispering inside his head.

The ride to the hospital was all too fast to his confused, numb mind, and when the car's engine finally died down he blinked up, frowning at the parking lot he now found himself in. Barely registering Mamoru's figure running into the building, he stood there, watching nurses and doctors and patients through the glass doors, knowing one tall blonde woman was surely somewhere in there.

Pregnant.

Haruka was pregnant.

Why did he have the feeling there was some major detail they were not telling him?

"Aren't you coming?" Makoto's voice got him off his own thoughts for a moment, as he looked into her sympathetic, green eyes.

"I... um... I'll go get some coffee," he excused himself, going across the street instead, suddenly needing to get away from all of them, from the noise in his head, to try and find some sense into all the madness.

.-.

Letting out a sigh, he ran his fingers through his hair, straightening up on the chair he had been sitting on for the past half an hour or so.

The unexpected run to the hospital had forced both Ami and Mamoru to start their shift earlier than expected, and he felt bad for that. But at the same time, he was glad they were around. Though Ami was just an intern, the blunette had left them in the waiting room, Mercury computer hidden in her robe's pocket, with the promise to run her own checkup on the racer, as Mamoru was busy practically barking to the nurses at the reception desk, ordering to call Haruka's doctor.

He chuckled. The Prince of Earth really knew how to get things done. In the blink of an eye, a nurse had taken the pale, semiconscious blonde to a room, a satisfied Prince soon tagging along to play the part, making sure mother and baby were alright, while they waited for Haruka's obstetrician to finally arrive.

And Yaten, Setsuna, Michiru and himself had been sitting there, waiting for either one of them to come and give them some -hopefully- good news.

Both shocked and surprised by the news, Hotaru was busy walking around in circles, with a worried frown upon her young features, and Taiki smiled sadly at the picture she made.

He knew this was not the way Haruka wanted her to find out.

Letting purple eyes traveled around the room, through the worried faces of the Inner Senshi, he let out another sigh. Yaten, Setsuna, Michiru and himself had kept the secret, respecting Haruka's wishes to tell the news in her own terms, waiting for the right moment. But with Seiya's amnesia, and everything falling apart, the moment never arrived...

.-.

He walked into the room, coffee cup in one hand, and the jacket he carelessly threw over a chair in the other. The monotonous sounds of the machines welcomed him, and a sad look came over his features as he saw him there, still unconscious, over the bed.

The empty chair next to the bed surprised him. But before he even had the time to wonder where she could have gone -he knew Michiru had unsuccessfully tried every single trick on the book last night to convince her to go home and have some rest-, a sound coming from the bathroom got his attention, and he frowned. Walking up and taking a peek through the half closed door, his frown deepened at the sight of the blonde, hugging the toilet for dear life while emptying her stomach's content.

"Shit..." he heard her gasping, lowly and tiredly.

"Are you ok?" he asked, walking to the washbasin and filling a glass with water.

"Jesus!" she exclaimed, practically jumping up in her kneeling position over the floor; a hand flying to her chest. "Don't _do_ that!" she complained, eying him. "God!"

"I'm sorry," he apologized, chuckling lightly, handing her the water. "But... are you ok?"

"Yeah..." she answered, accepting the glass and taking a long sip.

Closing her eyes, she rested against the wall, tiredly raising a hand and flushing the toilet, before bending her legs up and resting her head over her knees.

She looked really tired. And kind of pale too, but that might have more to do with her throwing up just now than her camping on that chair right next to Seiya's bed for over a week now. And though he highly doubted it was possible to get food poisoned at a hospital, there was so much crappy coffee and bland food one could put up with before having one's stomach making a strong protest against it.

But as he looked at her, taking in her tired expression, her sad eyes, and remembering she had yet to drink any coffee at all, it finally clicked.

She had been lacking appetite lately, frowning in disgust and even gagging at the smell of certain food. She had said herself she had been tired even before the accident, and now her throwing up like this...

"You're pregnant," it wasn't a question, but rather an affirmation.

And when doleful green eyes looked up at him, too tired to even look surprised at all, he knew, he was right.

"I... I'm late," she confirmed, tilting her head to a side and frowning. "But I'm not... I don't know... yet..."

He let out a sigh, sitting down on the floor right in front of her. "Do your breasts hurt?" he asked, gently. And then chuckling when she just blinked at him, cheeks suddenly burning red, as she crossed her arms over her chest. "It's usually a symptom," he offered, kind of embarrassed himself, as he made a mental list of other medical signs that, put together, usually indicated pregnancy, though he really didn't feel like asking such private questions.

She blinked again. Hands tenderly cupping her own breasts under her crossed forearms, and letting out a groan. A half frown, half wince coming to her features.

"You should go see a doctor," he pointed out, shrinking his shoulders. "To be sure."

"I'm almost a week late," she said, chuckling sadly.

He frowned at that. "But you just said..."

"I'm on the freaking pill," she pointed out, interrupting him. "I'm not supposed to _be_ late. That's the whole point!" she exclaimed, as she ran her hands through her short hair. "Shit..."

He frowned at the new information. "You should stop taking it," he advised. "It could be..."

"I did," she interrupted him shaking her head, and chuckling lightly. "It's not like I'm taking any risks _now,_" she joked, tiredly, "and Sets pretty much confiscated this month's course... right after promising to come by today with one of those home tests..."

"Good," he said, nodding his head. "But you do realize you're at a hospital, right?" he asked, arching an eyebrow at her. And then chuckling again when she simply glared at him. "Ok, fine. Home pregnancy test it is," he finally agreed. "You really should take some rest, though,"

"I'm fine," she argued, rolling her eyes. Resting her head against the tiled wall, she let out a sigh, closing her eyes for a moment, before looking at him again. "Great timing, huh?"

Even though he knew she was tired, and this was really a bad time for her to even be sleeping on a chair while her boyfriend laid on a hospital bed in a coma, he couldn't help himself. He smiled at her. Though dulled, the joy over such news spreading inside him.

"Congratulations."

A small, soft smile wanted to come to her lips at that, but she fought it off, frowning instead. Hugging her knees and half hiding her face in between her arms, the uncertainty dancing in her green eyes surprised him.

"How do you think he's gonna take it?" she asked, in a suddenly trembling voice. "If I am... I mean, we never really... talked... about..."

"Knowing him," Yaten's voice surprised them both, making them look up at the lime green eyed man, as he stood on the bathroom's door, resting his shoulder against the frame. Hands in his pockets, and smiling down to the blonde, "he'll be thrilled."

"How long have you been standing there?" he asked, curiously frowning up at the shorter man.

"Long enough," he simply answered, stepping into the bathroom himself and sliding down the wall, sitting next to the tall woman, passing an arm around her shoulders and smiling at her. "So, I'm gonna be an uncle, and he's gonna be the happiest man on the planet," he said, pointing with his head at the general direction of the black haired man still sleeping on the bed. "Did I miss something? Oh, right..." he answered himself, before any of them could said anything, "you're gonna be a mommy," he finished, smiling softly at her.

And she returned the smile, taking a deep breath as her eyes started suddenly watering. She chuckled then, blinking her tears away. "Stupid hormones," she cursed.

"Congratulations," Yaten said, chuckling at her remark, though wisely choosing not to add a comment of his own.

A soft, kind of cute blush came to her cheeks, as she finally allowed her smile to fully come to her lips. "Thanks," she whispered, in a low, soft voice.

"Come on," he said, standing up, and then extending a hand to her. "A cold floor is not the right place for a pregnant woman to be resting on."

"Neither is sleeping on a chair," Yaten noted.

"We'll get to that one later," Taiki said under his breath, shaking his head when the blonde simply rolled her eyes at them both. He passed his arms around her shoulders, bringing her close to him and hugging her. "Everything's going to be alright. You just wait and see."

.-.

A small smile made it to his lips upon the memory, as his purple eyes landed on Rei's nervous form. One hand up and seemingly busy eating her nails until Minako's hand slapping her stopped her from doing so, disapprovingly shaking her head and glaring at her while holding a silently worried looking Moon Princess in her arms. In retaliation, Rei's hand stopped Makoto's nervous foot from moving up and down against the floor, making the three chair bench they were all occupying tremble, and green eyes traveled up to the ceiling, as the Amazon let out an impatient, nervous sigh.

They were all probably dying to make all kinds of questions, just like they usually did, being their joyful, curious selves. But for now, they were quietly, though not so patiently waiting for Ami or Mamoru, or anyone really, to come and give them an update on Haruka's -and the little one's- well being.

And as Ami's petite form walked through the door, he wished to be true to his own words to the blonde back then.

"How is she?" Yaten asked, before the petite doctor could say anything.

"She's resting now," Ami answered, shrinking her shoulders. "There's no more cramps or pain, and there's been no bleeding, so that's a good sign."

"So they're both alright?" Michiru asked, still frowning somewhat worriedly, as a relieved hand made it to her chest.

"Yes," Ami said, smiling softly. "Dr. Iseya just arrived, and should be checking on her any minute now," she informed, taking a look around before fishing for her Mercury computer. "But I did run a scan on her, just in case..."

"And?" Taiki asked, getting a bit anxious himself.

"She had quite the adrenaline rush, which might explain her getting dizzy and then just... drained," she explained, checking on her computer and frowning lightly. "But her energy levels are a mess. It's still pretty early on the pregnancy, so it's normal for her to still be readjusting her levels to the baby's. But I don't think she's just readjusting. With these readings..." she trailed off for a moment, typing something in her computer, "it's as if she's unconsciously redirecting all of her energy, draining herself, and creating this swathe..."

"Ames!" Minako exclaimed, interrupting her. "In english, please."

.-.

He was losing his mind, and he knew it. But if he was right...

Taking fast, easy strides, he made his way down the hallway until he reached the right door. There has been no need to ask around to find it; by chance, while prowling around hallways, he had heard some nurses talking.

Poor thing. First her boyfriend, and now some robbers ruining Christmas for her. But it was just a scare. What a relief.

Resting his hand on the doorknob, he took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment and trying to clear his mind. There was so much noise in his head, he couldn't even think straight. But if he was right, then maybe it would explain that strange feeling he got from her every time she was around; that subtle pull that was now urging him to go to her, to open the door.

And he did.

Stepping into the darken room, with the white rolling curtains blocking the sunlight for the sleeping woman in there to rest, but letting enough light for him to see her. There was a white hospital band around her left wrist, and she was wearing one of those white with blue dots hospital robes, as she slept. Short, blonde strands gently resting against the pillows, face turned to a side; hands over her chest, loosely grabbing the sheets and blanket.

She looked peaceful.

He hesitated for a moment, staring at her. That feeling, that strange aura, now that he sought for it and welcomed it, pulling at him more strongly. And it was so familiar, in a subtle, delicate kind of way...

Taking a deep breath, he forced himself off the door he was resting on, walking up to the bed. Looking at her peacefully sleeping face, he reached out his hand, unsure of what he wanted. Not knowing if he wanted to prove himself wrong or not, or even if he really wanted to know at all. With his slightly shaking hand hesitating in the air for just a moment, knowing that even if he didn't want to know, he needed to, he closed his eyes, placing his hand over her flat stomach.

And he felt it.

Even through the material of the sheets and blankets, and a strong, invisible force shielding it, he felt it. It was small, delicate even, but it was there. And he could recognize his own energy, intimately linked to another one, mixing, dancing, connecting so profoundly, creating its very own and then eagerly coming to meet his touch.

But his amazement lasted only a few seconds. That shield around it got stronger, and a dark blue light suddenly illuminated the room. He barely had time to look up, surprised at seeing the planetary symbol of Uranus shining brightly in her forehead, and not so surprised at the deep, dangerous frown coming to her features; green eyes opened up, as a strong energy that he recognized immediately, for he had both seen it and felt it before, hit his hand, and him, away.

Barely able to dodge it, he flung across the room; his back hitting hard against the wall. He grunted out upon impact, more in surprise than in actual pain, putting both hands against the wall for support.

A surprised gasp made him look up at her again. Now sitting on the bed and the symbol in her forehead slowly fading, she looked back at him with eyes wide opened and eyebrows all the way up, as she brought a hand to her lips, in a half embarrassed, half surprised manner. "Seiya?"

"Damn..." he grunted out again. That wooden border on the walls was not so nice when crushing against it...

Green eyes blinked at him, before a sympathetic wince came to her features. "I'm sorry," she apologized, blinking again. "I didn't mean... I don't know..."

"It's ok," he said, raising a hand and interrupting her. "I shouldn't have done that with you unaware like that..."

She frowned at that, slightly tilting her head to a side. "What were you doing?" she asked, unconsciously crossing her hands around her stomach in a protective manner.

And he had to smile to that, chuckling lightly despite himself, and shaking his head. "Testing a theory," he answered, shoving his hands into his pockets as he looked at her.

There it was again. That hurt, that sadness flashing through her eyes as she looked away, as she fidgeted with the sheets rather nervously. And it surprised him, the way he was able to read her so easily. She was not really putting up a mask right now, and he knew it, but he also knew she was now silently waiting. Readying herself for him to freak out on her; to yell, scream, and bash out.

And though a part of him seriously wanted to do just that, another part, the insane one, felt hurt. Because she was waiting for him to hurt her, so sure he would start barking out any moment now.

And it hurt. Has he really been this mean to her?

"Hello, Haruka," came a female voice, as the door suddenly flung open and a woman in her mid forties walked in, wearing one of those white robes over her street clothes and carrying a chart in her hands. "I hear you had quite a scare... let's see how the little one is doing, shall we?" she said, smiling sweetly to the tall woman on the bed as she walked up to her.

Nervous green eyes flickered back to his midnight blues for a moment, before Haruka looked up at the doctor, slightly smiling at her and nodding her head.

A nurse waltzed right in, pushing a wheeled table with a machine of some sort in it, and the doctor smiled to her, pointing at the side of the bed. "Yes, right there, Chikako, thank you," she said to the nurse, who was fast to leave the room, closing the door behind her.

She wrote something on the chart and was about to say something to the still silent blonde, when she noticed him standing there. Not really knowing what to say, and suddenly feeling like a stupid, nervous kid, he just nodded his head to her.

"Oh, Mr. Kou!" she exclaimed, smiling at him. "Didn't see you there," she apologized, now extending her hand to him across the bed, forcing him to walked up to the other side of the bed himself to shake hands with her. "I'm Dr. Iseya, Haruka's doctor. Pleasure to meet you."

"Hi," he mumbled. "Pleasure."

Dr. Iseya smiled then, winking at the tall blonde. "I see daddy's anxious to see the baby's first picture."

.

.

* * *

><p><strong>Coming soon:<strong> "This is... this is not some weird, really nice favor of me, is it? Like one of those donors... things?"


	16. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me. If you like it, review it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

.

.

You and me,  
>we used to be together,<br>everyday, together. Always.  
>I really feel<br>that I'm losing my best friend,  
>I can't believe this could be the end.<br>It looks as though you're letting go,  
>and if it's real<br>well I don't want to know...

Don't speak,  
>I know just what you're saying,<br>so please stop the explaining.  
>Don't tell me 'cause it hurts.<br>Don't speak,  
>I know what you're thinking,<br>and I don't need your reasons,  
>don't tell me 'cause it hurts.<p>

Our memories  
>well, they can be inviting,<br>but some are altogether  
>mighty frightening.<br>As we die, both you and I,  
>with my head in my hands<br>I sit and cry.

[…]

It's all ending,  
>I gotta stop pretending<br>who we are...  
>You and me,<br>I can see us dying... are we?

[…]  
>Don't tell me 'cause it hurts.<br>I know what you're saying,  
>so please stop the explaining.<br>Don't speak, don't speak.  
>I know what you're thinking,<br>and I don't need your reasons.  
>I know you're good. I know you're real good.<br>Hush, hush, darling. Hush, hush...  
>don't tell me 'cause it hurts...<p>

**(Don't speak - No Doubt)**

* * *

><p><strong>15<strong>

Ami blinked at her friend's outburst, tilting her head to a side and blushing brightly. "Well... um..." she mumbled for a moment, trying to come up with the right words. "It's normal for her body to suffer some changes. And her being a Senshi, I guess it's also normal for her to be re balancing her energy..."

"And that means what?" Minako asked, arching a confused eyebrow.

"She has to make room for the baby," Taiki offered.

"Oh... I see," the blonde mumbled, nodding her head in understanding. "Ok, go on..."

"She's overdoing it," Ami continued. "I don't think she's aware of it, but with everything going on... she's focusing all her energy into the baby, shielding it."

"That's good, right?" Usagi asked, frowning lightly. "She's protecting her baby," she added, smiling shyly and cutely.

"Well, yes, I guess," Ami agreed, frowning too. "But like I said, she's overdoing it. Yes, she's protecting the baby from all the stress and... everything..." she said, waving her hand, "which explains why that hit didn't cause any real harm..."

"But it worn her out," Setsuna finished for her, nodding her head in understanding.

"She's already emotionally exhausted," Ami pointed out, shrinking her shoulders. "And with the fight, the scare, and everything else... she really needs to slow down and rest."

"But they'll be fine, right?" came Hotaru's soft, timid question. "I mean, papa and the baby..."

Ami smiled at her. "Yes," she assured her. "If she takes it easy and rests for a few days, they'll both be perfectly fine."

"She will," Michiru said, nodding her head. "I'll tie her down to the bed if I have to."

.-.

She looked up at him, sending him an apologetic look, hoping he would at least behave somehow while Dr. Iseya was in the room, leaving questions for later, before following her doctor's instructions and laying down on the bed. A blush coming to her cheeks as Dr. Iseya pulled the covers all the way down to her thighs, to then lift up her robe, while midnight, astonished blue eyes followed every move. There was a dark violet bruise in her lower belly, and she knew, it didn't look that nice when both her doctor and Seiya frowned upon it.

"Does this hurt?" her doctor asked, gently but surely pressing two fingers against her belly.

"Just a little," she answered, wincing slightly.

"Any other pain, cramps?" Iseya asked, and she shook her head in denial. "Bleeding?"

"No."

"Good, good," the doctor mumbled softly, as she gently pulled the lace rim of her already low rise hiphuggers down to her Venus mound.

And she closed her eyes, both thanking all and any God up there when Iseya stopped there, and desperately trying to fight down the bright red blush that came rushing to her cheeks as she could literally feel blue eyes boring at her, burning.

.-.

The moment Dr. Iseya moved to pull down Haruka's underwear, he felt like fainting, both embarrassed and ashamed, and seriously wondering if he really wanted to see this. But then his eyes caught a glimpse of black, and he blinked.

"_You like it?"_ he heard her asking, lowly and playfully, as he saw her pulling down the rim of her black, low rise panties. The pink lace rim giving up under her thumb, revealing the Uranus symbol over the right side of her lower belly, decorating her otherwise white skin.

And then he saw that same mark closer. His fingers gently tracing it, and going to kiss it; her flat stomach going up and down, fast, as he traced the tattoo with the tip of his tongue. The taste of her soft skin making him lose his mind...

He shook his head, blinking. The flashing images going away as fast as they came, and he found himself back in the hospital room, staring down at that same tattoo, as Haruka laid down on the bed, eyes closed and a faded tint of red decorating her cheeks, and Dr. Iseya took a bottle of some sort from the table.

"This is going to be a bit cold," she warned, squeezing the bottle and pouring a green gel over the still flat stomach.

As if on cue, the blonde gasped softly, and Dr. Iseya placed the scan over her lower belly, flickering it around a little to spread the gel and then pressing it against her skin. Nothing but what it seemed like muscles with a hole in them showed up at first, as Iseya moved the scanner around, pushing a few buttons.

"There it is," Dr. Iseya said, pointing at what he thought looked like a small caterpillar. "Everything looks good," she added, measuring and taking screen shots. And then...

He heard it before he saw it. The strong, incredibly fast, kind of chopping sound sending shivers down his spine, giving him goosebumps, as his heart stopped beating and sudden tears blurred his eyes.

"Is that..." he mumbled, amazed out of his mind.

"Yes," Dr. Iseya answered, not needed him to finish his question and smiling up to him. "That's the heartbeat. You have a strong little one," she said, now smiling to the blonde. "Congratulations."

"Oh my God..." Haruka murmured; her voice filled with emotion, and her own green eyes filled tears.

"Let me take a picture for you," Dr. Iseya said, pushing a button that made the machine make a sound; a small, rectangular piece of paper coming out of it.

She handed one of the pictures, keeping the rest and clipping them to the chart. And Haruka gasped again, taking the picture and looking at it. She chuckled softly, choking a little in emotion, in her own tears blurring her eyes, tucking the picture to her chest and smiling up to her doctor.

"Everything looks perfectly fine, and the baby is strong and healthy," Iseya said, turning the machine off and cleaning Haruka's stomach with a disposable cloth. "It was just a scare, and there's nothing to worry about, so I think it isn't necessary to keep you here for observation."

"Great," the blonde said, smiling at the news.

"But I still want you to rest in bed for a few days," the doctor instructed, warningly, yet never missing that soft, gentle tone to her voice. "No exercise or physical activity, ok?"

"Ok," the blonde agreed, nodding her head.

"Guess you won't be running anymore," he mumbled, suddenly remembering seeing her running through the park, and making green eyes blink curiously up at him.

"Well..." Iseya trailed off, tilting her head to a side. "I'll check on you next week. If everything is still looking good, then you can get back to it. But take it easy," she said, glaring at her. "Don't push yourself."

"I won't," she promised, nodding her agreement. "Thank you."

"My pleasure," Iseya said, smiling as she stood up from her chair. "Mr. Kou, it was nice to finally meet you," she said, once again extending her hand to him. "Congratulations, again."

"Thanks," he mumbled, shaking the doctor's hands, still in a bit of shock at, well, everything...

"Hope to see you again soon, and I'll see you next week," Iseya finished, now looking down to the blonde. "I'll go and sign the papers, so you can go home."

"Of course. Thank you again."

"No problem. Now rest," the doctor said, walking up to the door. "And Merry Christmas."

.-.

"Merry Christmas," she wished back, as Dr. Iseya stepped out of the room, leaving the both of them alone.

Reaccommodating the pillows behind her, she sat up on the bed, rearranging the covers and then folding her hands over her legs. Risking a glance his way, she waited for him to finally react. But when he did, it was not exactly what she was expecting.

"Oh my God..." he trailed off, running his hands through his hair and then resting them at the back of his neck. "I'm... I'm gonna be a father," he mumbled, blinking and staring at some point on the floor.

Well, that was the understatement of the century.

"Um... yeah," she said, in a low whisper, not really knowing what to answer to that.

He looked up at her then, blinking and frowning. "This is... this is not some weird, really nice favor of me, is it?" he asked, suddenly, taking a step back and crossing his arms over his chest, as if he didn't know what to do with his hands. "Like one of those donors... things?"

"N-no," she stuttered, surprised at him even saying that. Because, really, chances of her ever asking something like that to him eight years ago were simply none existent. "It's not... like that..."

He chuckled then, though to her it sounded more like a mix between a shocked gasp and a groan, as he raised a hand to his temples, turning around. "It wasn't a one night stand, was it?"

She closed her eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath. "Look, Seiya, I..."

"Because it doesn't make any sense," he continued, interrupting her, and turning back around to look at her. "You and I hate each other. And... and you don't even want me here, and you are a..."

He stopped himself before finishing, and she looked up at him at that.

"Go on, say it," she encouraged, slightly tilting her head to a side, too tired to even try to hide the hurt in her eyes. "I'm the lesbian bitch."

He raised one finger at that. "That last bit you just added it yourself," he pointed out.

She chuckled sadly then, shaking a shoulder and looking down to her own hands for a moment. "Turns out," she said, looking back up, straight into troubled blue eyes, "it's not really about the gender."

He blinked, once, before shaking his head. "How long?"

"Eight weeks."

"No, I mean... you and I..." he trailed off, still looking quite confused, "how long have we..."

"Oh... um... four years?"

.-.

He looked up at her again at her answered, and at the unsure, questioning tone in her voice.

Four years.

"Three and a half, actually. It'd be four in august," she offered, with a small, sided smile that didn't exactly reach her eyes, and shaking a shoulder. "Two weeks right after your birthday."

"My birthday?" he repeated, incredulously.

She just nodded her head, and he let out a sigh, looking up at the ceiling.

Several things came to his already thundering mind then. For one, he wasn't losing his mind, and those weird flashes really were memories, as crazy as that may seem. And not only that, but that hole, that sense of something being lost and missing, that nagging little feeling that kept him up over half of the nights and that loneliness that was slowly driving him nuts... it was as if at some subconscious level, he missed her.

He blinked again, passing a hand around his neck, massaging it.

Four years also meant, she was the one he sung for. The woman in his lyrics, the stories he told about... it was all about her.

"God..." he breathed out, amazed, surprised, shocked. "It really is serious, isn't it?" he asked, though he already knew the answer.

It was all there, really. And it was so obvious, too... the way she had been acting lately, the hurt in her eyes. That furtive kiss on the parking lot that night. Her tears...

"Look, Seiya, you don't have to do this."

He looked back at her at that, frowning. "Do what?"

"This. Being here," she said, shaking her shoulders while mindlessly pointing at the room in general. "I know you're going through a lot right now. I know how much Kakyuu meant for you and how hard it was for you to lose her," she said, in a tone that, given any other circumstances, he would have thought she was feeling sorry for him, pitying him. But the look in her eyes let him know, she wasn't pitying him at all. She simply understood. "And now she's dead, and Usagi is engaged, and suddenly you're a twenty four year old man with no memories from the past eight years, and you're having a baby with the one person on this entire universe you can't stand!" she finished, raising her hands up in the air. "I get it, ok? It's a lot to take in, and I get it. And you don't have to be here."

Again, he just frowned at her. "Wha-what..."

"Go home," she said, in a tired tone. "Go be with the guys, enjoy the rest of the day... you have other things to worry about right now. You have that show coming up and you need to memorize and learn your songs again..."

He blinked at that, surprised. "How did you know about that?"

A sad, broken chuckle escaped her then, and she let her eyes traveled around the room, shaking her shoulders. "It doesn't matter anymore," she said, lowly, huskily. "Just... go. Focus on your career and..."

"I can do both," he pointed out, interrupting her. Was she really pushing him off?

"Don't," she said, stubbornly. But then she let out a sigh, running a hand through her short blonde hair. "I know you. I know you don't remember anything right now, but I know you. You're a good guy," she said, almost shyly; big, green eyes slowly but surely watering. "You'd do anything to do what you think it's right, even if it means you have to put up with me just because I'm carrying your child."

"Well, yes," he admitted, frowning, utterly confused by now. "I mean, it's..."

"Well, don't," she insisted, interrupting him again, and with such a conviction in her voice that it surprised him. "I don't want you to."

He just stared at her at that, incredulous.

Yes, she was right. He really was going through a lot right now, and finding out he was going to be a father was... overwhelming, to say the least. The fact that she was the mother just added to his stupor and shock. It was all a little too much for him to handle and digest in less than an hour.

But... wasn't she supposed to love him? And why would she say that when he knew, she didn't mean it? He could see the hurt in her eyes; the swinging, drowning sadness, the barely controlled pain.

"You don't mean that," he noted; his voice barely a hurtful whisper.

"Yes I do," she argued.

"No, you don't," he argued back, frowning at her. "So why are you doing this?"

"Because!" she exclaimed, as a single tear rolled down her cheek, and she wiped it off, angrily. "It's not enough!" she exclaimed again, raising both hands up in the air, frustrated. "I want it all, ok? And you don't remember me... _us_… and it's just not enough..."

He walked back to the bed at the sight of her tears. "Haruka..."

"Please, just leave," she said, pushing him away before he could even reach her.

"No, I..."

"I don't _want_ you here!" she exclaimed, as yet another tear escaped her. Her eyes turning lighter with her tears as she glared up at him. "Get out of here, just... leave me alone."

He knew she didn't mean it. Somehow, not really sure how, but somehow, he could hear it in her voice. Read the truth in her eyes. She didn't want him to leave her, and yet she was pushing him away, and he just didn't get it.

"Leave!" she yelled, getting him out of his own thoughts and making him jump at the strength in her voice and the raw, angry sorrow in her eyes, in her cascading tears.

Not knowing what to say or what to do, and only knowing that, by him staying there he was not only not getting anywhere, but he was also upsetting her, he granted her her wish and turned around, stepping out of the room. Closing the door behind him, he rested against it for a moment, closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. His mind was a complete mess; he had never felt this confused, this lost before in his life, and he honestly didn't know what to do.

"What did you do?" Michiru's voice made him open his eyes again, only to find her standing right in front of him, frowning and glaring at him.

Setsuna and Hotaru were right next to her, looking at him as well.

He stepped away from the door, guessing they wanted to go in and check on Haruka, and knowing the blonde surely needed them right now.

"Nothing, I..."

"Don't you think you've done enough already?" the violinist asked, interrupting him.

"Michiru," Setsuna called out to her, in a rather chastising tone.

"What?" she all but barked back at her, frowning. "He's hurting her!" she exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger towards him.

"It's not like he's doing it on purpose," came Hotaru's soft, whispering comment, sending a sad, yet understanding look his way, and then just shrinking her shoulders in a rather shy manner when Michiru frowned at her.

"You promised" Michiru said, now looking back at him. "You _promised _you wouldn't hurt her."

"I'm sorry! I..."

She raised a hand up, shutting him up. "Get your act together already," she said, flickering one curly strand of aquamarine hair off her shoulder before walking past him, opening the door and getting into the room.

And he just blinked, confused out of his mind. A hand on his shoulder made him turn around to look into magenta eyes, and he frowned, trying to come up with the right words, or any words at all, to try and explain himself. But the truth was, he couldn't.

"Go home, Seiya," Setsuna advised, gently tapping his shoulder. "Get some rest. It's been a long day for everyone."

And with nothing more than that, the olive skinned woman walked into the room herself. The soft, kind of muffled sound of a broken cry coming from the room reaching him, as he stood there, with his heart heavy and suddenly glued to the ground, as he looked into wise, sad purple eyes. Not saying anything, probably knowing there wasn't much left to say, Hotaru stepped up to him, encircling her arms around his waist and hugging him. The gesture, small, caring, made him gasp, and he returned the embrace, hugging her back for just a moment, when the girl broke away, stepping into the room as well.

And he just stood there, looking at the now closed door, wondering what he should do now. Too confused and too lost to ask himself the real question he honestly didn't know the answer of.

Did he really want to walk away from the tall blonde?

.

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* * *

><p><strong>Next on "Remember me?": <strong>"All you remember is not particularly liking her, and you're holding on to that, even if you know it's not real anymore. I should know, I've been there myself"

A little statement: www dot bestsailormoonfanart dot blogspot dot com / 2011 / 07 / frienship-i-wish-was-shown dot html

Aaaaaand: www dot bestsailormoonfanart dot blogspot dot com / 2011 / 07 / sweet-guy dot html

Anyway! You know the deal. Any thoughts?


	17. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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I won't say your name.  
>I won't call you up or come around,<br>try to stay or let you down.  
>I will only disappear.<br>And I won't leave a trace of where I've been,  
>loose my head or make a scene.<br>And I won't say your name.

I won't say a word about the restlessness I heard  
>between the lines of everything I heard you say.<br>And I won't say a thing about  
>the way that you can bring me to my knees<br>with just a single look my way.  
>And I won't say your name.<p>

And I won't tell a soul about  
>how much I want to hold you in<br>my arms and never let you slip away.  
>And I won't tell or talk about<br>the way that I have thought about  
>how much I want you every single day.<br>I'll just say goodbye.  
>And I won't cry until I am alone.<br>Won't pick up the phone.  
>And I won't say your name<p>

**(I won't say your name - Edwina Hayes)**

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><p><strong>16<strong>

He straightened himself up, taking the coffee cup from the machine and taking a sip. A wince coming to his features as he drank it; it was terrible. But at least it helped to put something warm into his stomach, and it also gave him something to do while he waited.

Taiki had somehow convinced the girls to just go home. Haruka was being released any moment now, and she needed to rest. There wasn't really much any of them could do, anyway, so they had agreed with not much of a protest, not without promising on calling and checking on the racer tomorrow, and Rei pretty much threatening the both of them, making them promised on letting them know if there was any news.

Surely, they were now slowly getting mad for being kept in the dark about the baby, and Taiki and himself were the chosen ones to blame and get angry at.

Setsuna and Michiru had nicely but strongly asked them to leave them alone with the tall blonde; Hotaru tagging along with them, to have one of those Outers only moments of theirs. And with everything that went on on that day alone, he knew, they surely needed the time alone, so he was more than willing to give them that.

For now.

But that didn't mean he was ready to call it a day and go home. Oh no. He was going to stay there, drinking that awful coffee, waiting for them to finally get out of that room, making absolutely sure both Haruka and his future niece or nephew were perfectly fine. With both Setsuna and Michiru, he knew there was no need to ask for someone to make sure the stubborn blonde would get some rest; it was a guaranteed fact.

And then of course there was still one black haired jackass lost somewhere in that hospital, and he wanted to make sure said jackass made it back to his apartment safely. The idea of giving him a not so nice, sense kicking speech was tempting, but even he knew that was probably the last thing the guy needed right now.

A soft hit on his arm made him look up, as Taiki straightened himself up, stepping away from the wall he was resting against. And he frowned, turning around just in time to see the aforementioned jackass, walking down the hallway and up to them.

To say he looked like a train just hit him, wasn't even close.

"Hey, man," Taiki said, placing a hand on Seiya's shoulder. "Where you've been? We were looking for you."

Seiya didn't answer. Instead, he just let out a grumbling, low sigh, resting his hands on the window's frame, and then promptly hitting his head against the glass.

"Long day, huh?" he said, trying not to chuckle at Seiya's shocked, tired, and overall idiotic face.

"Listen, about earlier," Taiki started to say, "I'm sorry I snapped out at you like that..."

Again, Seiya didn't answer. The only indication of him even listening was the slight shrug of his shoulders and the sigh he let out.

He exchanged glances with Taiki, unsure of what to say. He didn't know how much he knew, and he really didn't feel like being chase around by one angry racer. But before either one of them could say anything at all, Seiya's next words answered his mental question.

"I'm gonna be a father."

Letting out a sigh himself, he rested his back against the window, turning his face to the side to look at him. "So, you know."

Blue eyes looked into his lime green ones, somewhere in between annoyed at being kept in the dark like that, and simply puzzled. "How did this happen?"

"Well, see, when a man and a woman have the hots for each other and get busy under the sheets..."

"We don't know," Taiki said, interrupting him, and placing a strong hand on his shoulder to keep him quiet.

"What do you mean, _'you don't know'_?" the black haired man asked, incredulous, choosing to ignore Yaten's answer, and finally getting his forehead off that window as he turned to look at the tall brunette.

"We don't," Taiki stated, shaking his shoulders.

Deciding now was really not the time to be mocking him, he shoved his hands into his pockets, looking into troubled eyes. "One day you two hated each other and everything was normal, and the next you started screaming at the top of your lungs you were in love with her," he said, chuckling lightly at the memory. "Next thing I know, you two were together."

"If you really want to know how that happened, you're gonna have to talk to Haruka," Taiki put in, resting a shoulder against the window himself. "Because that's a story only the two of you know."

"So go ahead, ask her, and then come and tell me," he joked, shrugging when they both blinked at him. "What? I've been wondering that myself for the past four years!"

"I can't," Seiya said, in a defeated tone. "She doesn't want me around."

"Well..." he trailed off, arching an eyebrow at his amnesic friend, "you've been a real ass to her lately."

"I'm sorry, ok?" the black haired singer exclaimed, getting off the window and taking a few steps away, now passing around. "I just... I don't get it!" he finally exclaimed, getting himself fall over one of the chairs in the hallway.

Letting out a sigh, Taiki slid down the wall, squatting down and looking at him. "Look, I know you don't remember a thing and this is all weird and surprising..." he reasoned, "but I also know you," he said, pointing at Seiya. "Every single time you see her you get all worked up, and you go out of your way just to get a reaction out of her," he pointed out, with what could be considered as a mocking glare upon his face. "And it's nothing like it used to be eight years ago."

He chuckled at that, agreeing with the statement. "You act like a little kid with a crush," he added, teasing.

Seiya frowned at that. "I don't..."

"Stop denying it," Taiki interrupted him before he could even try to defend himself. "I know you, so stop acting like you don't feel anything for her."

Letting out a rumbling growl, Seiya stood up, running his hands through his hair as he started walking in circles. "I don't know, ok?" he exclaimed, obviously frustrated. "I'm..."

"Confused," came a male voice, making the black haired singer turned around on his heels, only to look into deep blue eyes, and Mamoru's gentle, knowing smile as he stood there, one hand on his robe's pocket, loosely holding a few charts in the other. "You don't remember, so you don't understand where it's all coming from. All you remember is not particularly liking her, and you're holding on to that, even if you know it's not real anymore," he offered. "I should know, I've been there myself."

"Hey, man," he said, patting Mamoru's shoulder in a friendly manner. "Thanks for everything," he said, knowing Mamoru had been the one pulling a string or two to get the hospital call up Haruka's doctor, instead of letting the emergency team take over.

"Don't mention it. Anything for a friend," the Prince said, gently. "And I did take an oath and promised to look after patients," he then added, in a light, joking tone, "even if they're not born yet."

.-.

They all chuckled at that last comment, and he simply stared at them.

He hadn't really talked to the earthen Prince before because, well, it just felt weird. He used to have the biggest crush on his fiancé, after all, and upon finding out what had happened to him while they were fighting Galaxia, he felt bad for thinking he had simply dumped the Moon Rabbit by played a Houdini act when in truth, the guy was dead.

He had only seen him at both Makoto's birthday parties, and earlier that day, and unless one of the girls was around, he hadn't really exchanged more than a few words with the guy. But standing there now, with only Taiki and Yaten with them, he realized, Haruka wasn't the only one he didn't remember knowing...

"I'm a pediatrician," Mamoru offered, easily catching his kind of lost stare.

"Oh," was all he could mumble, nodding his head.

Well, that made sense. Of course Haruka would want him to look after the baby once it was born. And it felt good, in a way, to know he was going to be the one looking after his child's health. Someone to fully trust on, and who actually cared.

Because he obviously did; about Usagi, about the Senshi, about his unborn child, and about him as well. And it made him wonder... were they friends now? He seemed nice enough. And he was having a baby with the racer, so really, he didn't think it possible to be surprised at any other news they could throw at him right now...

"I thought you were busy with your rounds and such," Taiki commented, forcing him out of his own thoughts.

"I am," Mamoru agreed, nodding his head and pointing at the charts he was carrying. "I was actually just about to go to neonatal," he added, pointing at the end of the hallway, "to discharge a little one," he explained, now turning back to them and smiling. "I hear Haruka's being discharged as well."

Yaten smiled at him then. "You just know it all around here, don't you?" he said, taking a sip from his coffee, and then promptly frowning at it.

"Not everything," Mamoru disagreed, chuckling at Yaten's expression. "I still haven't figured out where to get decent coffee without having to go across the street," he joked lightly, shaking his shoulder. But then he turned to look at him, with a gentle, genuine smile on his face. "I know this is probably not the best time to say this, but... congratulations."

Despite himself, and the never fading blur he seemed to be trapped on, he chuckled at the Prince's remark, shaking his head. He felt as if he was walking on uncertain ground, blinded, and surrounded by a mist that wouldn't let him think straight. But he was still able to register little things, like Taiki's happy, though small smile, or the honesty in Mamoru's words.

"There comes Haruka's ride," Yaten said, pointing at the other end of the hallway with his head, and he turned around just in time to see a tall, light brown haired man dressed in casual pants and a sweater, coat in hand, hurriedly walking up to them.

They all straightened up, turning to the man as he approached them. And he frowned. His brain had decided to stop accepting any new information, and he honestly couldn't quite say how or why the forty something man in front him looked somewhat familiar to him, or why he felt as if he knew the sided smile decorating his still kind of youthful face.

"Kuuya, hi," Taiki greeted him, shaking hands.

"Hi," he said, politely, as he turned to the shorter man. "Yaten," he greeted, nodding his head, and then frowning lightly to the earthen Prince.

"Mamoru," he offered, shaking hands.

"Right. I knew that," the tall man, Kuuya said, chuckling in a rather embarrassed way. "Guess I really am getting old..." he trailed off, jokingly, as green eyes now turned to look into his midnight blues. "Seiya," he greeted, nodding his head to him.

He just blinked, frowning lightly, and the man's smile turned softer, as he looked at both his brothers instead. "Still nothing, huh?"

"Not a thing," Yaten confirmed, shaking his head.

"Oh, well..." he mumbled, slightly shaking his shoulders. "How is my girl?" he then asked.

_My girl?_, he wondered, frowning a bit uncomfortable.

"She's fine," Taiki answered, smiling gently. "Michiru, Setsuna and Hotaru are with her."

"Christmas at a hospital. That's a first, even for her," he joked, patting Yaten's shoulder as he moved to go on his way. "I better go see her, then."

With that, the tall, strangely familiar man walked away, leaving him frowning after him, wondering where he had seen him before. And though he felt as if the answer was quite obvious, he just couldn't grasp it.

"That's Haruka's father," Taiki offered, on cue, as if already knowing his mental question.

He raised both eyebrows at that. Same eyes, same smile. Well, that made sense now.

Turning back to the window, he raised a hand up, resting his forearm against the glass and leaning in his forehead, closing his eyes and letting out a sigh.

"Hang in there," Mamoru said to him, gently patting his shoulder.

"I just... I really don't get it," he mumbled, closing his eyes.

"And you won't, so stop trying to analyze it," the Prince advised, making him turn to look at him at his words. "You're trying to understand, with your head. And that won't get you anywhere," he pointed out, knowingly. "The more you fight it, the worst it gets. So just... hang in there. It'll come to you."

"And if it doesn't," Yaten put in, as that sided, mocking smile of his came back to his features, "I can always just... hit your head and see what happens."

He narrowed his eyes at the shorter man, as Taiki glared at him and Mamoru just chuckled, shaking his head. Letting out another sigh, he turned around, now resting his back against the window and raising up a hand, massaging his temples.

Mamoru was probably right. Analyzing and rationalizing everything was getting him nowhere, and his brain was really not up for the task right now. But he felt so lost, so confused. It wasn't just not knowing what to think or what should he do right now; he didn't know how he felt about all this, and that just confused him even more.

A beeping sound got their attention then, and Mamoru looked down at the pager clipped to his belt. Pressing one of the buttons, he looked up again, smiling rather apologetically. "I should go."

"Yes, of course," Taiki said, nodding his understanding. "Sorry to keep you here."

The Prince waved his hand, shaking a shoulder, before looking back at him. "Take it easy," he said, patting his shoulder.

"Yeah..." he mumbled. "And thanks for..." he trailed off, not really knowing what to thank him for. Everything, probably. For being there for Haruka and their unborn child. For caring. For hearing him out and offering some advice. For being a friend, even if he hadn't expected him to.

But the smile coming to Mamoru's lips told him he understood. "No problem," he said, nodding his head and then finally turning around, making his way fast down the hallway.

A pat on his shoulder made him turn back to Taiki, as the tall brunette pointed the other end of the hallway with his head and silently led him there, towards the elevators. And he followed put, going back to wondering where to go from there, as he walked, pretty much in autopilot, frowning and staring at the floor.

"What should I do?" he asked, in a tired, honestly lost tone, as they reached the elevators and Taiki pushed the button.

"Stop being such an ass and try to get to know her again," Yaten answered him. "She's a really nice person. Once you get to know her, of course..."

He blinked at the shorter man then. Things had obviously changed a lot in the eight years he couldn't remember. But he did remember Yaten not only disliking the racer almost as much as he did, but also being intimidated by her as well. He had never actually said that last bit out loud, probably out of pride, but the tall blonde certainly made one scary Senshi when angry...

"I can't believe you just said that," he said, chuckling at the irony of it all, walking into the elevator and resting against the wall.

"Well, she is!" Yaten defended himself, shaking his shoulder in a rather proud, arrogant manner. But then he looked up at him, slightly tilting his head to a side; a more serious, yet kind of sad look coming to his features. "And she loves you," he stated, simply, in a tone that left no room for arguments. "So much, that she's letting you go."

"More like pushing me away," he whispered, correcting him.

But Yaten shook his head, in disagreement. "You wanna know why we didn't tell you about this?" he asked, obviously not really needing an answer. "About you and her? Because she didn't want us to. And before you yell at me or her or whoever comes across your way, put yourself in her place for a second," he said, raising a hand up and successfully shutting him up before he could even said a word. "She knew you had a lot to catch up with, to get used to..."

"You know how things were eight years ago," Taiki pointed out, shrugging. "She didn't want you to worry about a relationship you have no recollections of, with the woman you supposedly hate."

They stepped out of the elevator, making their way to the entry door. And he grunted, massaging the brick of his nose and closing his eyes for a moment as they stepped outside; he could feel a monumental headache coming his way any moment now...

"I know. I see her point," he said, admittedly. "But what about mine?"

"Do you even have one?" Yaten asked, curiously.

He blinked at that. "I... I don't know..." he mumbled, honestly confused. "What do I do now?"

"I can't tell you that," Taiki said, shrinking his shoulders as he shoved his hands into his pockets. "But I can tell you this; she misses you, Seiya," he said; the honesty in his words making his heart sink, as the image of soft green eyes filled with tears assaulted his mind. "And she needs you. And right now, you need her too," Taiki continued. "Because no matter what you think, or what anybody else thinks, you were happy."

He looked up at him at that. He said that with such conviction, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. As if he knew he had been nothing but a wrack of nerves, haunted by the elusive memories of a woman, remembering only words and smells and how good warm, soft skin felt against his fingertips; wanting, needing to know who she was and what she meant to him. And now that the question to her identity has been answered, he was left behind wondering what she meant to him.

He had felt the need to be with her. To comfort her, to kiss her tears away and take her hand. To protect her. He had thought he was losing his mind, and now that he knew he wasn't, that it was all real, it made even less sense than before. Because, how could he miss what he couldn't remember?

Taiki smiled at him, gently and sadly, as if reading his mind. "That girl made you happy."


	18. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer:** all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story, so please don't steal it.

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><p>How I'd like to be able to live without air.<br>How I'd like to be able to live without water.  
>I'd love to love you a little bit less.<br>How I'd like to be able to live without you.  
>But I can't. I feel like I'm dying.<br>Without your love I'm drowning.

How I'd like to be able to live without air.  
>How I'd like to soothe my sorrow.<br>How I'd like to be able to live without water.  
>I'd love to steal your heart.<p>

How could a fish swim with no water.  
>How could a bird fly with no wings.<br>How could the flower grow with no ground.

How I'd like to be able to live without you.  
>But I can't. I feel like I'm dying.<br>Without your love I'm drowning.

How I'd like to be able to live without air.  
>How I'd like to soothe my sorrow.<br>How I'd like to be able to live without water.  
>How I'd love to steal your heart.<p>

How I'd like to throw you into oblivion.  
>How I'd like to put you on a drawer.<br>How I'd like to erase you with a blow.  
>I'd love to keep this song.<p>

**(Vivir sin aire - Maná)**

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><p><strong>17<strong>

The moment she walked into the room and her magenta eyes landed on the curled up blonde laying in there, with the sheets and blankets tangled around her frame, resting her head on Michiru's lap and sobbing quietly, she let out a sigh.

It hurt to see her like this; her heart breaking at the sight of her silent tears, she gave a small, weak smile to the teenage girl behind the blonde, as Hotaru kept her arms around Haruka's waist, hugging her close.

It has been like this all day. They would talk for a while or just lay there with her, offering comforting hugs and smiles until the blonde would fall asleep for a while. And then she would wake up, green eyes blinking up and searching around, as if trying to see if it had all been just a bad dream. But when sleep left her mind and reality sank in again, her tears would come back.

Every time.

Silently, she would cry for a few minutes before calming herself down.

And that hurt too.

She knew Haruka was a proud, strong woman, but this was a little too much, even for her. She wasn't even giving herself the chance to cry, for real, and let it all out. Instead, she was stubbornly bottling everything up, hurting herself more.

Walking up to the bed, she rested the tea cup she was holding on the night table, to then lay herself down on the bed, sitting on the spot right next to Michiru. A soft sniffling sound came from the blonde now right across from her, and she reached out her hand, gently stroking soft blonde strands with her fingers. Not really knowing what to say, knowing words were inadequate, she simply smiled at her, wishing she could somehow make it all better.

But there was only one person who could make things better for the blonde, and that someone was... well, currently unavailable.

"Where's Kalina?" Haruka asked, suddenly, frowning cutely.

"Under the coffee table," she answered, smiling softly.

Haruka nodded her head then, letting out a sigh and turning on her back, looking up at the ceiling now. Her eyes closing a moment as Michiru's fingers took up on comfortingly stroking her hair in a soothing, gentle manner. But then she opened her eyes again, taking a deep breath, fully and stubbornly composing herself again as she looked up at the ceiling again.

"Sorry for being such a burden lately," she let out, huskily.

"Don't say that," Michiru said, in a loving, yet scolding tone.

"You're always a burden," she said, in a teasing tone, she knew, wouldn't escape the blonde.

They simply knew each other too well. And she knew, in moments like this, when her stubborn as a mule friend was desperately trying to build up a wall to keep her emotions in control, not wanting to be vulnerable -even if, right now, she had every right to-, the best way to get a smile out of her was a lightly teasing comment. It was, after all, a technique the blonde always used with others to light up the mood a little bit.

And, as expected, a chuckle escaped her stubborn friend, as she hit her arm with her hand.

"I'm just here for the little one," she continued, winking at a now giggling Hotaru as Michiru simply rolled her eyes at her. "Someone has to make sure my future niece or nephew is being taken care of."

The softest, most tender of smiles came to Haruka's lips then; a hand going to her still flat stomach, right over the spot where a new life was growing inside her.

"Am I the only one that finds it ironic?" Hotaru asked, suddenly, making the three of them look up at her as the teenage girl arched an eyebrow, pointing a finger at her while looking at her papa. "The way she just said that, as if she doesn't know? Or has no way of knowing?"

Three pairs of eyes turned to her at that, and she arched an eyebrow in return. She knew that one would come up sooner or later...

"You're right..." Michiru trailed off, tilting her head to a side and looking into magenta eyes.

"I'm not an oracle," she simply pointed out, rolling her eyes. "I don't know _everything._"

"Sure you don't," Hotaru giggling, as she placed a hand on Haruka's stomach. "So, am I having a baby brother or a baby sister?"

She shook her head at her daughter, disapprovingly, yet amused at her eagerness.

Of course she knew. Though the future was not a one way, written in hard stone line, and several elements had to come together in order for things to happen, once a few events came to be, certain things would remain the same, regardless of the circumstances around it. Like the baby's gender. But just because that wasn't going to change and she knew it, didn't mean they were supposed to know before time...

"I can't tell," she said, looking into soft, curious eyes. "You know that..."

"I know," Haruka said, nodding her head and letting out a sigh, as her green eyes traveled around the ceiling. "I know, but just... just tell me everything's going to be fine," she pleaded, looking up at her again. "I'm not asking for any details or anything, just... I just need to hear it. From you."

And she smiled at her then, knowing that, even though Haruka was keeping herself from asking anything at all, never one to ask and want to know the future before hand, this time she needed to know. She needed reassurance, to know that, somehow, things would eventually get better.

"I can't really tell you anything," she said, reaching out her hand and gently stroking blonde bangs aside when green eyes went back to the ceiling at her words. "But I can tell you this," she soon added, smiling again when the blonde looked back at her, "you are going to have the most beautiful baby, and you'll be a wonderful mother."

The small, soft smile that came to Haruka's features then was heart touching, illuminating her face, as emotional tears came to her eyes, and a choked chuckle escaped her.

"But I should warn you, though," she continued, in a more teasing tone, "with seven aunts, three uncles and one older sister, you'll have a very _spoiled_ beautiful baby."

"You bet!" Hotaru exclaimed, as they all laughed at her comment.

"You don't need any special powers to know that one," Michiru noted.

"Of course not," she agreed, nodding her head. "I was only making a statement, here. You know, to warn her."

"You just want to be able to say 'told you so' later on," Haruka pointed out, rolling her eyes.

She arched an eyebrow at that. "With you around? I'm sure I can find one reason or another to say that," she stated, laughing softly when the blonde hit her arm again. "But for now, and if you do your part and rest, everything's going to be fine," she added, tenderly moving Haruka's bangs aside, soothingly caressing her forehead. "And you know what wise men say, when one door closes, a window opens..." she trailed off, softly.

The blonde let out a low, sad sigh at that, and her smiled widened just for a second, knowing those were probably not exactly the words Haruka wanted to hear. And then she slapped the blonde's forehead.

"Ouch!" Haruka complained, frowning up at her and rubbing the spot.

And she frowned right back at her, putting on her best scolding face. "Don't close the door."

.-.

Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, he pressed enter, letting the search engine take over and show some results.

If it really has been that long, then there had to be something on the internet. And though he didn't know what the search would throw, and wasn't even completely sure of what he wanted to find, at the same time, he just needed to see it. To prove to himself he wasn't going insane, hearing voices and hallucinating.

Ordering himself to open his eyes, he looked at the first few links the search had thrown. The one on the top was from a magazine or a newspaper of some kind, judging by the domain alone, and though that 'hottest couple in Japan' title was catching, the link right under it got his attention almost immediately.

It was a fanpage of some sort, a shrine, and the thought of something like that even existing made an eyebrow go up in genuine surprise. As a singer and a rather public person himself, he was used to having fans; they came with the job. But he also knew devoted -and usually teenage- fans were doomed to be heartbroken when the object of their platonic love gets into a relationship. And though the idea of this relationship of his being so well accepted was nice, it was still surprising, considering who the woman he was supposedly dating was, along with her very own, well known fan club...

And this fanpage wasn't the only one, either. Though it was the first on the list.

"Ok, here we go," he said to no one in particular, as he clicked on the link, preparing himself for whatever he was just about to find in there.

With very nice, tasteful graphics and a clear platform to navigate, the page seemed pretty well done. Profiles, quotes, interviews, pictures, news... it was obviously quite complete. But what surprised him the most was the banner whoever designed the page had chosen. With a sepia effect that gave it a somewhat soft, kind of tender touch, there, right in front of him, was a close up of him, kissing the tall blonde racer.

Taking a deep breath, encouraging himself, he clicked on the pictures archive, deciding to go for the information and whatever details they had let the public known for later. He really needed to see this...

It took a moment to fully load, but once it did, it actually surprised him how many images there were. Parties, galas, openings, premieres, shows of all kinds, candid. Holding hands while walking down the street, dancing at some night club, laughing at something on a backstage, kissing in a racing track with the blonde wrapped on her racing suit. Every single imaginable picture was in there. And once again, on every single one of those pictures, he got to see different sides of the woman that was currently chasing his sanity away.

Among the most recent ones, there was a picture of the two of them smiling up to the cameras, in what it seemed to be an after party of some sort. With his hair on his usual ponytail, and wearing a simple dark blue shirt with a few buttons undone and hanging off his jeans, sleeves rolled up over the matching black casual jacket all the way up to his forearms, he stood there, with one hand on his pocket, and the other casually yet tenderly holding Haruka's hand. Blonde short hair, untamed and falling into green eyes gently outlined in black, bringing them up in her softly smiling face, she stood there, slightly leaning in towards him, sporting a white three quarters sleeve shirt with a black, loosen vest on top, and white and blue striped wide pants covering her legs.

They looked... well, they looked good. At ease. And though her choice of clothes was something he was already used to seeing in her, not really marking her figure -except maybe for the way those pants hugged her hips, he noted-, something in the way she stood there, holding his hand and smiling to the camera... She looked feminine, even in her quite androgynous outfit. If that was even possible...

The next picture surprised him even more. With an impeccable black suit and tie, this time unaware of the picture being taken, he stood in the middle of a small crowd on some gala, with his hands resting on the hips of the most amazing creature. Because standing right next to him, in between his arms, with her back half turned to the camera, was not the Haruka Tenoh he knew. Wrapped in a fitting plum dress that hugged every single inch of that tall, very well sculptured body, with a low open back and spaghetti straps crossed and tied in the back, she looked... damn, she looked gorgeous.

And as his eyes traveled down to that glorious looking bottom, that plum fabric marking it nicely, and he caught himself wondering if she was even wearing any underwear, he closed his eyes, letting out a groan. Flashes, voices, whispers coming back to his head as that nagging little feeling attacked him again.

A feeling that now he was able to recognized. As crazy as it was, he knew he just couldn't fight it anymore.

He was attracted to her.

He wanted to be near her. Hear her voice, the sound of her laughter. Take her hand, and hold her in his arms. He wanted her to kiss him again, and he wanted to return the kiss. But most importantly, he wanted to kiss her tears away...

An image of that same bottom came rushing to his mind then, barely covered by the blue with white polka dots underwear, white lace trim going all around, moving to the beats of some pop song. And he saw her there, standing in his kitchen, pouring herself some coffee, shaking her ass and singing to the song.

"_You're getting really good at rummaging through my clothes,"_ he heard his own voice saying, making the dancing, singing blonde turn around. His eyes going to the green football shirt with the number eighteen on it. The neckline loosely hanging from her neck and shoulders, and the green material barely reaching her thighs.

"_Didn't think you'd mind,"_ came her husky, teasing voice, as she looked at him, shaking a shoulder.

"_Maybe I do," _he teased back, as he walked up to her, encircling his arms around her thin waist.

Green eyes narrowed at him then. _"Fine,"_ she grunted, though her voice still had that teasing, playful tone to it. _"You can have it back,"_ she said, taking the shirt off and shoving it at his face. _"Happy now?"_

He shook his head as the flashing memory dissolved, going away as fast as it came. The feel of round, full breasts pressed against him still lingering on his chest, making him moan despite himself.

"God almighty!" he groaned out, massaging his temples.

.-.

They were just settling in over the couch, watching some tv while Setsuna made dinner, when the doorbell rang. And she frowned, managing to keep the groan that wanted to escape her, but still rolling her eyes, not that thrilled at having to abandon the couch she had just sat on.

She was tired, and the headache currently slamming her temples was just not helping. But deciding another insisting ring would certainly make her headache worst, and knowing the storm that has been threatening all day would surely strike down any moment now, she forced herself out of the couch, making her way to the door, and wondering who could it be at this hour.

The girls had already had their check in for the day, and so had Taiki and Yaten. Their providers had surely made a lot of money with them, what with so many calls coming and going that day alone. But they had all agreed on giving their racer friend the peaceful, quiet moment alone she had asked for for the night -she would not escape from a Senshi invasion the following day-, and there really wasn't a need for any of them to pay them a visit and ask for an update.

But as she opened the door and she looked into deep blue eyes, she knew, he hadn't had any update. Though that was probably not the main reason for him being there, either.

"I need to talk to her," Seiya said, straight to the point, and confirming her suspicions.

Letting out a sigh, she raised up a hand, massaging her temples. "She's not here."

"Look, I know I haven't been the nicest guy in the world lately," he started to say, with a clear hint of regret in his voice, and plain confusion dancing in his midnight blues, "and I know she doesn't want to see me and you guys don't want me around..."

"That's not exactly true," she interrupted him, smiling sadly to him. Sure, she had been a bit rude to him, back at the hospital. She blamed it all on being worry sick and feeling frustratingly powerless.

"I'm trying to get my act together, here," he said, in a pleading tone that didn't escape her. "But I can't do that by myself. I need to talk to her," he insisted. "I know it's late but, please... I need to..."

"Look, Seiya, I like you," she said, raising a hand up and gently but strongly interrupting him. "I do. You're a nice guy, and a loyal friend, and you're good to her. Or you used to be, up until a month ago..." she trailed off, tilting her head to a side and frowning slightly. "And I know it isn't your fault," she was fast to add, when he opened his mouth to say something. "But like I told you, she's not here. She doesn't live here anymore."


	19. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story, its prequel, and every single OC in it belongs to me. So please don't steal!

.

.

I don't mind it. I don't mind at all.

It's like you're the swing set, and I'm the kid that falls.  
>It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried,<br>we come to gloves, and every night  
>the passion's there. So it's gotta be right.<br>Right?

No, I don't believe you  
>when you say don't come around anymore.<br>I won't remind you,  
>you said we wouldn't be apart.<p>

No, I don't believe you  
>when you say you don't need me anymore.<br>So don't pretend to  
>not love me at all.<p>

I don't mind it, I still don't mind at all.  
>It's like one of those bad dreams when you can't wake up.<br>Looks like you've given up, you've had enough.  
>But I want more. No, I won't stop.<br>'Cause I just know you'll come around.  
>Right?<p>

(...)

Just don't stand there and watch me fall.  
>'Cause I still don't mind at all.<p>

It's like the way we fight, the times I've cried,  
>we come to gloves, and every night<br>the passion's there. So it's gotta be right.  
>Right?<p>

No, I don't believe you  
>when you say don't come around anymore.<br>I won't remind you,  
>you said we wouldn't be apart.<p>

No, I don't believe you  
>when you say you don't need me anymore.<br>So don't pretend to  
>not love me at all.<br>I don't believe you.

**(I don't believe you - P!nk)**

* * *

><p><strong>18<strong>

The sheets were cold.

She was curled up, right in the middle of the bed, hugging the pillow and with the sheets and blankets all the way up to her head. She couldn't sleep, and would have turned and tossed around in the bed at least a good twenty minutes ago, if the sheets weren't so cold.

She growled into the pillow. What the hell was wrong with her? She used to be a lot tougher than this. She was never such a whiner before...

It was all his fault. He just had to waltz in into her life, all smiles and charm, making her fall head over heels for him, get her pregnant, and then turn her into this whiny person she didn't even recognize. And it was all because of him. With his deep blue eyes, and his low, sexy voice and long hair.

He wasn't even that perfect, anyway. So really, why did she miss him this much? It took forever to force him out of the bed in the mornings without food bribe, and he was always munching all that junk food he loved so much. It was a good thing he was so into sports, or else she'd had a really fat boyfriend by now, what with all those pizzas and his beloved cheese burgers...

Green eyes flung open then.

_Crap..._

No longer caring about the cold sheets making her feet cold in return, she turned around, laying on her back and staring up at the ceiling. No, she was not hungry. She wasn't. She had a really nice, warm dinner, being a good girl and eating what Setsuna had so thoughtfully made for her, and she had enjoyed every bit of it and had a full stomach.

Yes, she was all done and ready to just fall asleep. So she closed her eyes again, commanding herself to just do that. Because she was not hungry, and she did not want a double cheese burger... with fries...

Forget the fries. Just the cheese burger.

_Oh, for Christ's sake!_, she cursed, growling again. _I'm not hungry!_, she told herself. _It's all in my head. It's late, you already have your dinner. So just close your eyes and go to sleep already_.

Her stomach seemed to want to make a statement against that, jumping and grumbling, and she whined, opening her eyes again. Arguing with herself like this was a little bit too much for her. She kind of rather going back to whimpering and missing the damned freaking alien, than arguing with her own stomach.

At least the first one was more... justified... and normal, given the circumstances... wasn't it?

_Great, now I'm judging and criticizing myself!_

She didn't even _like_ junk food that much. What was there to like? Nothing but pure grease going to her arteries and then straight down her ass. And she was a healthy person, with a very healthy diet. And sure, she was only human, and every now and then she indulged herself with some good old sweet treat, like chocolate or a piece of cake or something. But junk food was just not her thing.

"Stupid, freaking alien," she cursed, kicking the covers off and getting off the bed, "with his stupid double cheese burgers," she grunted, as she walked into the closet, putting on the first jeans she found, and then going for her Australian sheepskin boots, "with onions and tomatoes," she kept rumbling on, stumping her now booted foot against the floor as she put on the other, "and special mustard..."

Kicking the closet's door shut, she walked out of the bedroom while throwing on a sweater over her sleeping shirt. Mumbling and cursing through her teeth all the way down the stairs.

She was going to get lectured for this, and she knew it. But it wasn't as if she was going to run all the way there. She wasn't that stupid, and it really was late. So she was going to get nicely wrapped in her coat, get in the car, drive all the way there, get her order, and then drive back home.

Fast and easy. No big deal.

A look around the dark living room told her Kalina was still on her favorite hiding spot, under the coffee table. What kind of comfort that place represented, was beyond the racer. But Kalina was asleep. So maybe if she didn't make much noise she wouldn't spend a good fifteen extra minutes trying to stop her from waking up the entire neighborhood while getting her into the car and...

She didn't even get to finish that line of thought when blue eyes opened up, and Kalina got out of her hiding place. Running all the way to the main door, both jumping and whining. She caught her by the collar, and before she had time to even wonder what was wrong, the doorbell rang.

"Shit!" she exclaimed, jumping up in surprised.

.-.

He could feel Her. Around him. A lingering scent, floating in the air.

He could recognize that scent anywhere, anytime, no matter how faint. And, like in his dreams, it felt as if she was trying to reach him, to tell him something. Encouraging him. As crazy as it sounded, he couldn't shake that feeling off, and he couldn't even tell if it really was all just a feeling, or if it was real.

Was She really there with him right now? Somehow?

He really was losing his mind. At least a part of it. The other part he had obviously lost four years ago. And that didn't make any sense either.

He looked at the small paper again, though unnecessary, for he had already memorized the address. Or maybe a part of him remember it? He wasn't sure. He wasn't sure of anything. But as he looked through his car's window at the house now in front of him, at least some things started making some sort of sense. At least now he knew why his apartment seemed so cold, why it felt half empty.

He had often wondered about that, and now he knew.

Ever since waking up on that hospital, he had wondered about a lot of things. About his apartment, about that hole in his chest, about that strange feeling of something being amiss. And it all led back to this; to this house now in front of him, and to the woman somewhere in there.

After showing up on their doorway and finding out the one person he needed to talk to didn't live there anymore, Michiru had given him this address. And though the violinist hadn't offered much of an explanation, considering he was now on a residential area near the sea, it wasn't hard to guess why he had kept the apartment down town. It surely seemed far more convenient to spend the night there when going out and maybe sharing a few drinks with friends or something. And, he figured, it has probably been easier to move whatever clothes and personal items she had on said apartment, than for her to move back with the Outers, leaving him alone and with no memories on such a big house.

Taking a deep breath, gathering his courage while praying to any mighty being for the words to come for him to try to explain himself, he stepped out of the car. Walking down the small path leading to the main door, he stood there for a moment, now telling himself that he needed to do this, that he needed to talk to her.

Because Mamoru was right. He was trying to understand, with his head, and it was getting him nowhere. He couldn't even begin to understand how was it possible for them to stop despising one another long enough to leave room for something else -anything else. Yet it had happened, somehow, and everything was too confusing, and he needed to understand.

Whatever he had seen in her before, he needed to see it now.

He just hoped for her to give him a chance...

Taking another deep breath, knowing it was late and she was probably already in bed, but unable and unwilling to wait any longer, he ringed the bell. A curse and... a whimper?... came from the other side of the door, and he frowned, as that husky voice reached his ears again.

"Go to bed!" he heard her saying, in a clear, ordering tone.

"What?" he mumbled to no one in particular, staring at the door. What was she doing in there?

But as the door finally opened and green eyes looked up at him, he barely had time to even mutter a word when a rather big ball of fur jumped up to him, tackling him down to the floor as a wet nose and a large, rough tongue attacked his cheek, tickling him.

"Kalina!" he heard her yelling, and he blinked, frowning at the word -or rather, the name-, as the ball of fur was taken off him. "Stop that!"

He sat up on the floor then, blinking and frowning at the blonde woman now holding an excited looking dog, tail happily waving and tongue hanging out.

"Seiya?" she asked, holding down the dog by the collar. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah..." he answered, as he stood up from the floor. "Just... got me by surprise, I guess..."

"I'm sorry," she apologized, as in turn, the dog barked up to him, wagging her tail and trying to jump up at him again, only stopped by the blonde's strong hold. "What are you doing here?" she asked, shaking her head and frowning at him.

"We need to talk," he stated.

Her frown deepened. "Wha... I..."

"I know you said you don't want me around, but just... hear me out, ok?" he was fast to say, before she could say anything.

She hesitated for a moment, tilting her head to a side. But when the dog barked again, Haruka groaned, walking back inside and guiding the excited looking dog with her, while signaling for him to follow with her head.

And he did, closing the door behind him and then taking a fast look around at the portion of the living room he could see from his position. Freeing herself from the blonde's grip, the dog went to him again, whimpering and wagging her tail, tongue hanging out happily and blue eyes looking up at him, welcoming him in. And he chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his neck with one hand while petting the dog with the other.

"I'm sorry," the blonde apologized again. "She's still a puppy, and she's kind of clumsy and scatty..." she trailed off, squatting down and trying to make the dog stop licking his hand now. "I guess she misses you..." she murmured, not meeting his eyes.

But he heard her, and he frowned. While still surprised and slightly amused at the welcoming party, a part of him felt as if he had just walked into some kind of twilight zone. The strange familiarity the unknown house awoke in him was simply too weird, along with how natural it felt to see her living in a place like this.

"Kalina, stop it," she scolded the dog, earning a whimper in return, as the silver dog sat on her hinds, tilting her head to a side and looking up at her owner with a now sad face.

"It's ok," he was fast to say, squatting down as well and gently petting her head. "Kalina?" he repeated, frowning for a moment, as he looked into green eyes again. "Is that Kinmoku's..."

"Ancient language?" she finished for him, nodding her head. "It is."

He nodded his head, absently, as he met Kalina's blue eyes again. "Saesa omentien lle, Kalina," he said, now caressing the dog's ears, chuckling when she barked happily back at him.

"Technically," Haruka put in, making him look at her again, "you've already met her. You met her before I did, actually. You just... don't remember..."

"I get that a lot lately," he joked, leaving the bit about her understanding or knowing the language for later.

She snorted at that, running a hand through her hair and standing up, taking a few steps into the living room before turning back around. "What are you doing here?" she asked, straight to the point. "I thought we agreed on..."

"No, we didn't," he pointed out, interrupting her. "You yelled, I backed away. But we didn't agree on anything," he corrected her, straightening up, not really daring to leave the front door general area quite yet, just in case she decided to start yelling again. "I know you said you don't want me around, but I also know you don't mean that," he started. "I can see it in your eyes," he pointed out, chuckling softly and sadly when she adverted her eyes away. "And quite frankly? It's freaking me out!" he continued, raising both hands in the air in pure exasperation. "It freaks me out to be able to read you so well. I keep thinking about you, and I can't get you out of my head... I keep getting this... flashes..." he trailed off, running a hand through his hair, "of you saying something about wanting a yacht and a house on the suburbs, and a silver labrador," he said, pointing at Kalina, who was still pretty much sitting on her hinds and wagging her tail, bright blue eyes looking up at him, "wearing some goddamn sexy underwear and a freaking wig..."

Green eyes went wide opened at that. "You remember that?" she asked, in barely a whisper. Cheeks blushing furiously.

He blinked at her then. "That actually happened?" he asked, his own eyes going wide opened as well.

Was this really Haruka Tenoh? _The_ Haruka Tenoh?

"Um... well..." she mumbled, scratching the back of her neck nervously, obviously embarrassed. "Yeah..."

He blinked again, astonished. "I wasn't even sure it really _was_ you!" he exclaimed. "I thought I was losing my mind!" he added, grabbing his head with both hands in emphasis. "And when I saw you crying the other day, I had this... compelling need to go to you and hold you," he said, pointing at his own chest, "and I can't stop thinking about that kiss..."

"Sorry about that," she mumbled, blushing yet again.

"I can't stop thinking about it," he continued, ignoring her apology.

He thought she looked adorable right now, all blushed like that, but he wasn't just about to accept her apology. He wasn't sorry. Shocked, surprised by it, and simply overwhelmed by everything that laid behind it? Yes. Sorry? Not quite...

Which, again, it only added to his overall confusion.

"It keeps replaying over and over and over in my head," he continued, "and I don't understand why I have this... urge... to kiss you, to hold your hand..." he admitted, smiling shyly when she blushed even more, if that was possible, crossing her arms over her chest in a cute, embarrassed manner. "And now it turns out we have a life together, and... It doesn't make any sense, and I don't remember... anything!" he exclaimed. "My head... doesn't remember you."

There it was again, that pain, flashing through green orbs again as she looked away. But he didn't want her to look away. He wanted her to understand, to know. He was a mess, and he needed her to understand why.

"But the rest of me does," he said, hesitantly taking a step towards her. "Because every time I see you I... I get all these... feelings..." he tried to explain. "And it breaks my heart to see you crying, and just the sound of your voice makes my heart beat faster, and I just don't understand!" he exclaimed again, frustrated. "So you gotta help me out here. Help me understand..."

"Seiya, I..." she started to say, shaking her shoulders. "What do you want me to say? What do you want?"

"I want to understand," he said. "You said it's not enough. And you're right, it's not. And I'm sorry," he said, taking a final step towards her, raising a hand to place it on her shoulder, before he stopped himself from doing it, unsure of her reaction. "Just, please... don't push me away," he pleaded. "Give me a chance. At least let me get to know you again... please."

He saw her blinking at him, one blonde eyebrow slightly going up in what it looked like a contemplative manner, and he knew he had just got his answer. She didn't look completely sure, and she certainly didn't look like she was going to voice her acceptance, but the fact that she had yet to say no to him and kick him out was encouraging. A small, sided smile came to his lips then, and when he saw her letting out a sigh and then just raising her hands up in the air in a surrendering gesture, he chuckled.

She really did have her pride, didn't she?

But as he saw her standing there, waving her options, or maybe just wondering what to say next, he noticed something else. "Why are you dressed up?" he asked, looking her up and down; he was sure those jeans and boots were not part of her usual sleeping clothes.

"I'm hungry," she answered, sheepishly, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You're supposed to be resting," he pointed out, arching a questioning, disapproving eyebrow.

"I know," she said, slightly narrowing her eyes at him for a moment. "And I was. I'm just going to get something to eat and then I'll get back into bed."

He frowned at that, genuinely curious. "Don't you have any food in here?"

"Yes," she answered, now frowning too, as her eyes traveled around the hallway they were standing on. "But I don't have what I want..." she added, in a hushed murmur.

He couldn't help it; an amused smile made it to his lips at her answer. "Cravings?" he asked, guessing she wasn't actually hungry, but just craving for something. A very specific something, judging by her clothes; she seemed ready to head out. "Where were you going? I'll get it for you"

"No, you don't have to..."

"I insist," he said, firmly, interrupting her. And then smiling again at her slightly reddening cheeks and her blinking green eyes. She looked rather cute like that. "The doctor said you need to stay in bed and rest, so... what do you want?"

"A burger," came the whispered answer, and he frowned, not really catching her answer. And she rolled her eyes at him. "A burger," she said again, more louder this time, and a bit irritated too.

"Ok," he said, nodding his head and chuckling lightly. He could always use a burger. "I'll go find a McDonald's then..."

"No, not McDonald's," she said, shaking her head, as a disproving frown came to her features. "I don't like McDonald's."

"You don't...?" he trailed off, blinking at her. "Those are the best burgers in the world."

"Maybe for you."

"How could you _not_ like McDonald's?"

"Do you really want to argue with me right now?" she asked back, arching an eyebrow at him, nonchalantly. "Because that's an argument you always lose, buddy. Besides, there's this diner not that far from here. Big homemade burgers and special, german mustard," she taunted.

Damn. She really did know him well, didn't she? That satisfied smile that came to her lips then only proving that point.

"Double cheese, easy on the mustard."

"That's all?" he asked, taking mental note of her order.

"That's all," she said, nodding her head.

"Got it," he said, chuckling lightly, ready to go and get her late night -and probably second- dinner. "You go and lay down, then."

"Hey, Seiya?" she called out to him as he opened the door, making him turn around again.

She threw something at him, and he caught it right on. And then he blinked, both surprised and kind of touched as he looked down at the set of keys now resting in his hand. The ghost of a small, kind of shy, unbelievably cute smile was tugging at her lips as he looked at her, shoving her hands into her pockets and shrinking her shoulders.

And he returned the smile, nodding his head. "I'll be right back."

She nodded her head then, slightly biting on her lower lip. "Ok."

.

* * *

><p><strong>Next on "Remember me?":<strong> "That cheating little dwarf would do anything to try and find out..."

'Saesa omentien lle' means pleasure to meet you, and kalina means light. Since I used elven as Kinmoku's ancient language on Fiery Tales, I'm sticking to it and taking a few advantages here and there... hehe


	20. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. I only own this story. So please don't steal it!

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Empty spaces fill me up with holes.  
>Distant faces with no place left to go.<br>Without you within me, I can't find no rest.  
>Where I'm going is anybody's guess.<p>

I tried to go on like I never knew you.  
>I'm awake, but my world is half asleep.<br>I pray for this heart to be unbroken,  
>but without you all I'm going to be is<br>incomplete.

Voices tell me I should carry on,  
>but I am swimming in an ocean all alone.<br>Baby, my baby,  
>it's written on your face.<br>You still wonder if we made a big mistake.

(…)

I don't mean to drag it on,  
>but I can't seem to let you go.<br>I don't wanna make you face  
>this world alone.<br>I wanna let you go.

I've tried to go on like I never knew you.  
>I'm awake, but my world is half asleep.<br>I pray for this heart to be unbroken,  
>but without you all I'm going to be is<br>incomplete.

**(Incomplete - Backstreet Boys)**

* * *

><p><strong>19<strong>

He parked his car back in front of the house less than twenty minutes later. Requested order for one tall blonde woman, and a little extra for himself, all nicely wrapped in a polystyrene packaging and a paper bag, right on the passenger seat.

The diner wasn't really that far off, and the late hour played on his favor, as the number of costumers was low. The nice middle age man that ran the place had looked happy to see him, ordering his usual the moment he saw him walking into the diner, and then asking how he was doing, saying how he hadn't seen him since before the accident, asking how were things with his lady. And then he had seemed genuinely surprised when he asked for Haruka's order, which lead him to believe he probably paid that diner a visit or two every now and then. So deciding to trust his own tastes, he left the task of finding out what that usual of his consisted of for later, he simply accept the orders and paid the bill, before jumping back into the car, making the way back fast.

Taking the food and locking his car, he walked up to the front door, using the keys that had been given to him earlier. A smile coming to his lips when he clearly heard Kalina's happy welcoming bark coming from the inside.

It was strange, in a good, curious kind of way, how such small things could warm up his heart. Like a happy dog welcoming him in, or Haruka giving him the keys to the house. Sure, he knew that was just for convenience's sake, so that she could go and lay down properly, like she was supposed to. And of course he was going to give her the keys back; things were still kind of awkward for him to even think of the possibility of moving into the same house with her, even if, technically, it was his house too.

These small things offered a sense of accomplishment; he still needed answers, needed to understand, but at least he was going somewhere. At least now the chance to actually figure things out was there, and she seemed more cooperative than before.

Easily catching Kalina as she jumped up to him, balancing the paper bag in one hand, he walked into the house, closing the door behind him and taking a few steps into the living room. And as he did, one specific blonde head popped out from the couch, hands resting on the back of it as she looked up at him, and he stopped on his tracks, frowning.

"I thought you were going to lay down."

"I am," she said, nodding her head, as her green eyes went straight to the paper bag on his hand.

"I mean in bed," he said, now in a more chastising, questioning tone.

"I'm pregnant, not dying," she complained, rolling her eyes.

Walking up to the couch, and pretty much following Kalina as the dog walked around it to then promptly sat on her hinds while resting her head on the blonde's legs, he stood by the couch, placing the drinks on the coffee table.

"You got hit real hard yesterday," he pointed out, looking back at her as he took a seat right across from her on one of the single sofas, opening the bag and taking out the packages.

Green, interested eyes following his every move, eagerly. "I'm fine. The baby is fine," she said, reaching out and taking one of the polystyrene boxes. "But the mother is hungry," she added, as she opened the box up. But then she frowned; a small, kind of childish wince coming to her face as she handed the box right back to him. "This is yours."

He chuckled at that, taking the offered box and giving her the other one instead. "Sorry. Here you go."

She opened her box, doing a small check, probably making sure it really was hers and he had indeed got what she asked for, and then a small, satisfied smile came to her lips, as she took a bite from her burger. And he chuckled at her enthusiasm and at the cute, childishly happy look on her face as she ate.

And he watched her for a moment, absently taking his own burger and taking a bite. The strong taste of the german mustard filling his mouth instantly; there was a hint of parsley in the meat, mixing with the mustard and the melted cheese... it was delicious. Truly delicious, and he moaned, closing his eyes for a moment.

"Better than McDonald's, right?" she asked, in a tone that, in any other circumstances, he would have considered as mocking, though now he could see, there was no actual mean undertone. Just a playful, even endearing teasing.

He smiled at her. "I think you know me well enough to know that, already," he pointed out, tilting his head to a side.

"I do," she agreed, nodding her head. "I told you, we've been dating for almost four years. What kind of lousy girlfriend would I be if I didn't know what your favorite food is," she added, shrinking her shoulders in what he thought was a cute, shy manner, even though she seemed to be trying to fight it off.

"Good point," he noted, nodding his head. A small, sided smile coming to his lips as he saw her shaking a shoulder and tilting her head to a side.

There it was again; that masked shyness of hers, as she looked away. Was she always like this? Or was she just uncomfortable with him? He couldn't tell. And as the storm that had been threatening to come finally started, a thunder both filling the room and making Kalina whimper softly as she seek for refugee under the coffee table, he took his chance, not letting the thunderstorm and silence take over.

"So," he started to say, getting her attention again, "how did we... I mean..."

She scratched the back of her head at that, in a rather cute mix between shyness and embarrassment. "It's kind of a long story..." she mumbled.

"I have time," he stated, chuckling at her now slightly reddening cheeks. If he wasn't curious enough before, that blush was definitively making him curious now.

She stared at him for a moment, before finally letting out a sigh. "You can't tell anyone," she said, warningly.

Arching a curious, questioning eyebrow, he frowned. "So it really is a secret?" he asked, remembering what he had been told about it so far. "Taiki said he doesn't know..."

"Yes, it's a secret," Haruka stated, interrupting him, and with a look upon her face that told him, she was seriously not kidding. "And you can't tell anyone. Specially not Yaten," she warned, frowning now. "That cheating little dwarf would do anything to try and find out..."

He laughed at her remark. Somewhere in the back of his mind registering the fact that, eight years ago, he would have probably jumped at her neck for ever talking badly about his friend. And though he certainly agreed with her, and he would probably use similar if not the exact same words, something in the way she said that let him know she cared for the aforementioned dwarf.

It was that same mocking, yet endearing tone he had heard her use with Setsuna.

"I won't, promise," he assured, nodding his agreement.

But when nothing but silence came from the blonde in front of him, two black eyebrows went up, as a sided, half curious and half amused smile came to his lips upon the light blush decorating Haruka's cheeks. This shy side of hers what completely new to him, and utterly surprising.

"So?"

She tilted her head to a side, looking up for a moment, in thought. "We played a game," she said, looking at his general direction, but not quite meeting his eyes. "And we both lost."

He frowned at the rather vague explanation. "What do you mean?" he asked, curiously, before the blush on her cheeks turned a shade darker, and, again, that curious, sided smile came back to his lips. "Does this have something to do with the lingerie?" he guessed.

"Yes," came the dry, husky reply, as the blonde shook her head, trying to fight the red off her face. "I was working at this... exclusive club," she explained a bit further.

The math was easy to make; there were not that many places where lingerie plus exclusive club could work together. He blinked, honestly surprised at the news, and green eyes narrowed at him, as she seemed to guess his line of thoughts.

"Not like _that_," she was fast to say. "I just danced there."

"Wearing tiny lingerie," he added for her, arching an eyebrow and chuckling despite himself.

And she blushed again; cheeks burning furiously. "Yes," she answered, though he hadn't exactly asked. "You sort of... showed up one night, and we started a game."

"What kind of game?" he asked, suddenly finding the story quite interesting, in the most surprising, incredible kind of way.

Those flashing images of her, hips and arms waving, hands caressing her own pearly white skin, all shinning green eyes and teasing smiles, running back to his mind, out of order and not quite giving any kind of sequence he could make out. Still not making any sense either, though her little -and edited, he noticed- tale proved them real. No matter how unbelievable. Or uncomfortable.

He had honestly no clue of what he was capable of, of what he may have done on such situation with her, and he couldn't help but feel embarrassed at himself, at the flashing images running through his mind, and at the road his thoughts were taking now.

"You mean like a seducing game, or something more...?" he trailed off, unable to voice the other less innocent -if he could call innocent any kind of game that involved the tenacious blonde and the word seducing in it-, much more explicit possibility his mind came up with.

"Seducing," she answered, blushing yet again. "_Just_ the seducing..."

"Ok..." he mumbled, frowning and chuckling, all at once, in a kind of nervous way. "Why?"

Seriously, why? Why on earth would he ever take part in such a game? With her, of all women!

She chuckled then, too. "I don't know," she answered, in all honesty, frowning lightly and tilting her head to a side. "It's really stupid, if I really think about it now... But we did, and one thing led to another... and..." she trailed off, scratching the back of her head in what he clearly read as an embarrassed manner.

And he smiled at this newly discovered shyness of hers. "We both lost," he finished for her, nodding his head. "I see... so how do we go from that to me screaming at you at the top of my lungs in front of everyone?" he asked, remembering Yaten's words.

Again, she chuckled. "That was just you overreacting and going ballistic," she joked, kind of mockingly. Though that light blush still burning her cheeks and the way she smiled at him let him know that not only she didn't mean that, but she also thought of that one argument as a fond memory.

Finishing her burger, she clean her hands and mouth with a napkin, before making a small ball out of it and throwing it over the coffee table. Raising her feet up on the couch and hugging her legs, she looked at him, with the faintest, cutest of smiles decorating her lips as she tilted her head to a side, shrinking her shoulders.

"I thought it was all just a game for you," she finally said. "You never said anything, and I thought you were just playing a game. So after we... you know..." she trailed off, unable to keep the red from brightly burning up her cheeks again.

And he chuckled, nodding his understanding. She was really, seriously cute, all blushed like that...

"I was hurt," she admitted. "And didn't want to see your face ever again. Two weeks after that, we all went to Rei's to help her with some remodeling at the Temple, and you just showed up there..."

He frowned at that. "Wait, two weeks?" he asked, remembering one little fact. "Two weeks after my birthday?" he said, repeating her words from the day before.

Again, she blushed, clearing her throat and then scratching the back of her neck. "Um, yeah," she mumbled.

Seiya smiled. "Interesting..."

"Anyway," she said, raising her tone just a little bit, probably to shut him up and keep him from making any more comments like the one he just made. "You showed up there, wanting to talk things out. I didn't, so we argued," she said, chuckling lightly now. "It was more of a screaming contest than anything..."

"I can see that happening," he agreed, chuckling along with her.

"Yeah..." she mumbled, amused now. "Long story short, you admitted it wasn't a game for you, and then walked away like a coward, little chicken before I even had the chance to say anything. So I had to break into your apartment and wait for you to finally show up to tell you exactly that," she finished, with a rather proud smile dancing on her face. "Among other things."

He blinked. "You broke into my apartment?"

"Yup," she said, again, proudly. "Took you months to give me the key, by the way," she added, now in a more teasing, reprimanding tone, before shaking her head and shoulders, looking at him. "I had to tell you my part, too, and it was all your fault we even came to that, anyway..."

"My fault?" he asked, both incredulous and confused. "How come?"

"You never said anything."

One black eyebrow went up then. "Did you?"

"Girls never say it first," she said, shoving her nose up in the air. "Men freak out easily. Even _I_ know that."

He chuckled at that, not in the least offended, but rather amused, both at her statement and at her know it all smile. "Since when do _you_ play by the rules?" he inquired, one questioning eyebrow going up, teasingly. "So, we kissed and made up," he concluded, not giving her time to answer his question.

And she blushed again. "Yeah, basically," she mumbled, clearing her throat. "So, you know... here we are."

"Here we are," he repeated, mindlessly nodding his head. "About to have a baby," he added.

Haruka blinked at him then, frowning. "About that... it just kind of... happened," she admitted, in a huskily low voice, with a worried tone to it that didn't escape him. "We didn't plan... or really talked about... you know, having a baby."

He blinked; eyebrows going up in a wondering manner. "Oh?" he said, not really knowing what to say to that.

"I didn't even think it was possible," she said, empathizing that last word, tilting her head to a side and frowning. "With you being from another planet and all... I mean, I didn't know you were that well... equipped... as a man..."

He chuckled then, amused with her rambling babble, not in the least offended by her comment about him being from another planet at all. He knew enough by now to know she no longer saw him as an intruder -at all-, and he could actually understand her surprise at them being able to even conceive a child in the first place. Not because he didn't know he was 'well equipped' as a man, as she had put it, but because she did have a point; they were from different galaxies altogether, so really, there was no way to have known the possibility was a real one.

"And I was on the pill, anyway, so there was nothing to worry about," she was saying. "But I guess I missed a pill or two, and of course you just had to decide to show up and surprise me while I was away," she explained, pretty much rambling on. "And then I forgot to tell you, and..."

"It just happened," he finished for her, again, amused at her babbling, now accompanied by that cute light blush on her cheeks, as he easily guessed where she was going with that little mumbling explanation of hers.

She let out a sigh then, looking down at her own feet for a moment. "I know you have a lot to deal with and process, and I know right now is not the best moment," she pointed out, raising her gaze again. "But since we're having this conversation, you should know... I'm keeping this baby."

He blinked at her then, honestly surprised at even the suggestion of a second option. "I... I would never ask you to..."

"We never talked about this," she said, interrupting him. "And I have absolutely no idea of how you feel about it..."

"I'm amazed," he said, interrupting her, and looking straight into her eyes. "And, you know, shocked," he then added, admittedly, smiling when she chuckled, despite herself. "I would never ask you..." he trailed off, unable to say it out loud. But he knew she understood his point, as he saw her holding her legs tighter, protectively, and he smiled at her. "We're having a baby," he said, in a low, soft tone. "There's a life... growing inside you, and that's amazing," he said; the soft smile on his lips never fading as he looked her in the eyes. "In every single possible way," he soon added, making her chuckle again.

She looked at him for a moment, biting on her lower lip as green eyes bored into his soul. Resting her chin over her knees, she titled her head to a side slightly. That light blush he was soon becoming used to coming to her cheeks again as the huskily whispered words that followed warmed his heart in a way he couldn't even describe.

"You'll be a great dad."

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><p>Coming soon, another little step... somewhere!<br>Meanwhile, any thoughts?


	21. Chapter 20

__**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please do not steal!

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_Ese barco velero cargado de sueños cruzó la bahía._

_Me dejó aquella tarde agitando el pañuelo, sentada en la orilla._  
><em>Marinero de luces con alma de fuego y espalda morena,<em>  
><em>se quedó tu velero perdido en los mares, varado en la arena.<em>

_Olvidaste que yo, gaviota de luna, te estaba esperando,_  
><em>y te fuiste meciendo en olas de plata, cantando, cantando.<em>  
><em>Te embrujó aquella tarde el olor de azahar.<em>  
><em>Olvidaste que yo, golondrina del aire, te estaba esperando.<em>  
><em>Te llevaste contigo mis últimos besos, mis últimos años.<em>  
><em>Te embrujó aquella tarde el olor a azahar.<em>

_Ese barco velero cargado de sueños cruzó la bahía._  
><em>Me dejó tu mirada de fuego clavada en la mía.<em>  
><em>Marinero de luces, de sol y de sombra, de mar y de olivo,<em>  
><em>se quedó tu silencio de rojo y arena clavado en el mío.<em>

_Olvidaste que yo, gaviota de luna, te estaba esperando,_  
><em>y te fuiste meciendo en olas de plata, cantando, cantando.<em>  
><em>Te embrujó aquella tarde el olor de azahar.<em>  
><em>Olvidaste que yo, golondrina del aire, te estaba esperando.<em>  
><em>Te llevaste contigo mis últimos besos, mis últimos años.<em>  
><em>Te embrujó aquella tarde el olor a azahar.<em>

_Ese barco velero cargado de sueños cruzó la bahía._

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That sailboat loaded with dreams went across the bay.  
>It left me that afternoon shaking my kerchief, sitting on the shore.<br>Sailor of lights, with soul of fire and a dark back,  
>your sailboat stayed lost in sea, beached on sand.<p>

You forgot that I, seagull of moon, was waiting.  
>And you kept on getting into silver waves, singing, singing.<br>It bewitched you that afternoon, the azahar's scent.  
>You forgot that I, swallow of air, was waiting.<br>You took away with you my last kisses, my last years.  
>It bewitched you that afternoon the azahar's scent.<p>

That sailboat loaded with dreams went across the bay.  
>It left me your stare of enlightening fire stubbed within mine.<br>Sailor of lights, of sun and shadows, of sea and olive,  
>your silent of red and sand stayed stubbed with mine.<p>

You forgot that I, seagull of moon, was waiting.  
>And you kept on getting into silver waves.<br>It bewitched you that afternoon, the azahar's scent.  
>You forgot that I, swallow of air, was waiting.<br>You took away with you my last kisses, my last years.  
>It bewitched you that afternoon the azahar's scent.<p>

That sailboat loaded with dreams went across the bay...

**(Marinero de luces - Isabel Pantoja)**

Azahar is orange blossom water (or lemon), but azahar sounds better :P

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><p><strong>20<strong>

A thunder echoed through the room as her barely whispered words lingered in the air between them. And she lowered her gaze, embarrassed at her own words, at her own weakness whenever he was around. But she couldn't help herself, and she meant what she said.

If there was one thing she absolutely knew for sure, that was it. Seiya would be an amazing father, offering care, protection, giving their child words of advice and fun, memorable moments. Giving all the love in the world, and more. Giving himself fully, not holding back.

Never holding back.

It was the only way he knew how to love. Fully, and wholeheartedly.

She turned her gaze to a side, looking at the dark, stormy sky, letting out a soft, tired sigh. He was trying. She knew that. And she could only guess how bizarre and simply confusing everything must be to him right now. Yet, she couldn't help herself; she wanted more...

"_Don't close the door,"_ Setsuna's words came back to her as yet another thunder filled the silence, illuminating the room from the wide backyard sliding doors.

No, it was not enough. But it was something, and she found comfort in knowing he was at least willing to try and get into a more friendly, civil ground. They were having a baby, and, if anything, he seemed more than willing to be a part of the baby's life. And though it wasn't enough, and it hurt so much to have him right there, in front of her, and yet so far away, she forced that feeling away, burying it deep inside her, telling herself it would have to do.

For now, it would have to be enough.

Where things would go from there, she didn't know; she didn't dare to hope. But he was the father of her child, and even if things never went back to the way they used to be between them, she still wanted him to be around. He had a right to be, if he chose to, and she knew that, right now, she needed to think about her baby first. She needed to leave the door open, to whatever it might lead. So that, maybe, they could get past the awkward tension between them to try and give their baby the best they possibly could.

"I should go," his voice got her attention again making her turn to look at him. "I have rehearsal tomorrow," he explained, excusing himself. "And songs to learn, while at it," he soon added, gifting her with a small, sided smile, chuckling lightly.

She blinked at him then. That reminded her...

"Right," she said, straightening up in her spot and sitting properly now. "You think you could help me out with something first?"

"Yeah, sure," he agreed, "what do you need?"

She stood up then, nodding her head and pointing at the closed doors behind him. "It's in the music room."

"There's a music room?" he asked, sounding surprised, as he stood up as well.

She turned back to look at him at that, arching an amused eyebrow. "It's you and me we're talking about here. A music room and a training room are mandatory," she pointed out, as she leaded the way. "And a big garage, of course," she soon added, unable to keep the big, happy smile off her face.

Any other woman would have fell in love with the house at the sight of the large walk in closet, or the equally large in suit bathroom, with a shower with crystal sliding panels and a cast iron bathtub. Or maybe the kitchen, wide and spacious, with large windows that faced the backyard, allowing natural light most of the day. Or even the backyard, with a deck adjacent to the house and a small, though beautiful pool, with a waterfall that just added the right touch.

There were two more bedrooms upstairs; a guest room that hasn't really been used but left the option open for any of their friends if needed, and Hotaru's room, for when the teenage girl came to spend some time with her papa and ended up spending the night over.

The basement has been turned into a training room, with a weight bench, treadmill, and a mat in the middle of the room for body combat and training, where they had spent a lot of time clashing. After setting a few strict rules, of course. While the not holding themselves back one has been kind of hard for them to follow at first, not wanting to really hurt one another, avoiding all and any soft, sensitive areas has been considerably easier; they did love each other, after all, and though it was a good way to keep in shape, it was only meant to train -and maybe vent out frustrations. But they were both quite competitive, and their matches usually extended for long periods of time until one of them would win, fair and square, and undeniably.

Admittedly, they were both sore losers, and they made a small, private competition out of said training.

The sliding glass doors on the living room lead to the backyard. To the left, right next to the stairway, a double door lead to what it was originally intended as a study room, or maybe a small library. But with the necessary arrangements it has been turned into a music room instead, hosting Haruka's black grand piano, Seiya's guitars and drums, and a small recording booth with microphones and a switching mixer. It was, for the most part, Seiya's little piece of heaven, and where he wrote and composed most of his songs.

Yes, it was a beautiful, big house. Worth every single penny they had paid for. But for her, what sealed the deal was the garage. It was big enough to host their cars, her motorbike, all her tools, and still there was enough free space for her to work and move around. And it was, mostly, her territory. But she hadn't spent that much time in there as of late. It was hard enough to face the empty space in her bed, and right now, she didn't feel strong enough or tough enough to face the empty space where Seiya's car should be.

"Guess you're right," Seiya's voice got her off her own head.

Turning back around, she took a few steps into the closed double doors, placing her hand on the door handle, hesitating for a moment. Shaking her head, she opened the door, walking into the music room and stepping to a side for Seiya to walk in as well.

The room was covered with soundproof panels from wall to wall, to ensure good quality recording, and prevent any possible complaints from neighbors during the late night music sessions. The grand piano on a corner to the left, the booth with the switcher to the left. Two guitars were resting on floor stand display racks near the booth, with a couch and a coffee table filled with music sheets next to it. There was a third empty rack, where the acoustic guitar should be, which was now on Seiya's old apartment. It was, after all, the first one he got when coming to definitively live here on earth, and the one he went to when he wanted a little get away from the world, with no particular song in mind and just stroking the strings away.

The drums were right in the middle of the room, and next to it, a black hard shell guitar case with a red ribbon on it stood proudly, getting the attention of one black haired singer right away.

He blinked, frowning and turning to look back at her, and she smiled, nodding her head in encouragement.

He blinked again, rubbing the palm of his hands against his pants in a rather shy, nervous manner, before taking the remaining steps that separated him from the awaiting case. Resting it on the floor, he opened the clasps, before turning to look at her once more, silently asking for permission.

"Go ahead," she encouraged, nodding her head again.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the case to reveal a completely black, electric guitar. And he just stared at it for a moment, kneeling on the floor, before looking up at her again. Midnight blue eyes wide and opened. An astonished expression written all over his face. "Is this a Les Paul?"

"A 1957 Costum, yes," she answered, nodding her head. "I think it's unofficially called 'the black beauty.'"

"Yeah... It _is_ a beauty," he said, turning to look at the guitar again for emphasis.

"And it's yours."

He blinked up at her at that. "You're kidding me, right?" he asked, incredulous. "You... you're giving me this?"

"See, I kind of lied when I said I didn't get you anything for Christmas," she explained. "But, you know... with you not remembering and all..."

"How did you even found it?" he asked, still astonished, and kind of curious now too.

"On the internet," she answered. "Some guy was selling it for a ridiculously low price, case included," she explained. "I know the Sunburst is your favorite, but, well... it's an original vintage, and I thought maybe you'd like it..."

"Like it? Are you nuts?" he asked, interrupting. "It's beautiful! I-I can't accept this..."

"Yes, you can. It's yours," she said, shoving her hands into her pockets. "I even put a ribbon on it."

He chuckled at her joke, shaking his head in pure amazement, and she smiled, tilting her head to a side and looking at him.

She had been a bit unsure of whether he'd like it or not. She didn't know teenage Seiya that much -or at all-, or how much of a guitar lover he was back then. The Seiya she knew, the one she had fallen in love with, took care of the three guitars he owned with the same love and commitment she took care of her car and bike; he polished them, loosened the strings to clean the pickups and the bridge, and made sure of getting new strings every now and then. He even treated the cases with extreme care.

But the astonished, almost happily drooling expression over his face told her he really liked it. And she was glad; he was always so thoughtful when it came to gifts, it made her happy to be able to give him a dreamed guitar. Even if it wasn't a Sunburst. Again, by the look on his face, she knew it wouldn't take long for this Costum to become his new favorite baby.

He took the guitar out of its case, resting it on his thigh and stroking the strings, testing them and the sound they made. And again, she smiled; she always liked to hear him play like that, mindlessly, almost instinctively.

"Wow..." he trailed off, now caressing the strings without actually playing anything. "I-I don't know what to say..."

"You don't have to say anything. Just take it," she said, in a coping tone, understanding.

He was probably feeling uncomfortable. They had been on good, friendly terms for less than an hour; of course he wasn't comfortable taking such gift.

But it was his to take. She wouldn't even know what to do with it, and the guy she had got it from knew actually less about guitars than her. This particular one has been sleeping for long enough as it was, and she knew Seiya had a show coming up in a week; he would be able to bring the instrument back to life, while probably -surely- looking like a music god.

"Now I feel really bad for giving you that book," he mumbled, tilting his head and frowning.

She blinked, taken by surprise at the comment. "What do you mean?" she asked. "I love that book."

"And you already have it," he said, looking up at her again.

She smiled to him again at that.

Yes, she already had a copy of that book. An old, thumbed and with loosen pages copy. And there used to be this tall, handsome black haired guy living with her and sharing the bed with her every night that would always teas her, saying she needed to either get a new copy, or find herself a new favorite book.

That was why she had been so surprised when he gave it to her. Although she knew he didn't remember anything, he didn't remember her and how they used to be or what they've shared, for a moment, it felt as if he was back. As if, maybe, and only for the tiniest of moments, when he had picked up that book thinking it'd be a gift she'd like, he remembered.

"I loved it," she said, in a soft, husky voice. "It was very thoughtful."

A slight, unsure frown came to his features then. "Was it?"

She chuckled, nodding her head. "Yes," assured him.

He chuckled too, closing the case and standing up again. "If you say so..." he mumbled, tilting his head to a side.

"I do," she insisted. "Trust me, you have no reason to feel weird or awkward for taking that guitar."

He blinked up at her at that, looking surprised for a moment, before that soft, sided smile of his she loved so much came to his lips, and he chuckled, shaking his head. "You really do know me," he murmured, looking straight at her for the split of a second before adverting his eyes away.

It was such a shy, cute gesture, the way he looked away like that, she found it hard to keep on standing there with him. It made her want to go to him and hold him close. Encircling her arms around him and burying her nose in his neck, breathing him in, like she always did.

"I should probably get going now," he said, as if reading the change in her, somehow.

"Yeah..." she agreed, not really knowing what else to say, as she buried her hands into her pockets.

"Would you mind if I come back for this some other time?" he asked, pointing at the new guitar. "I don't want the case to get ruined with the rain," he reasoned, as that sided, slightly shy smile of his came back to his handsome features. "That way I can come back... and talk some more, maybe?"

A soft tint of red came to her cheeks at his softly, shyly spoken words, and she wished, not for the first time that night -or even before that-, she could be able to stop that damn blush, somehow. But even after four years, the guy still had a way to make her blush, no matter what. Even when he didn't remember a thing...

But she ignored it the best she could, nodding her head. "Yeah, sure," she answered, unable to keep her own soft, small smile off her own face as she looked at him. "No problem."

He returned the smile, a little more confident now. "Great," he murmured.

.-.

After helping her cleaning up the small mess they have left over the coffee table, and saying goodbye to a suddenly sad looking dog and her blonde owner, he ran the small distance to his car, knowing he couldn't avoid getting wet, but managing not to get completely soaked.

Inserting the key and starting the car, he couldn't help the small, sided smile from coming to his lips.

Things went well. Better than he had hoped for, even.

Yes, it was still strange and weird and... bizarre. Around her, he felt both at ease and out of place; he wasn't sure of what to say or how to act around her half of the times, and he knew she certainly felt the same way around him.

It was kind of surprising, to be able to read her so easily, to catch the slight differences in her tone. And her eyes were so easy to read at times. But only at times. And he knew, she was probably putting up a mask, still unsure. Still not fully trusting him.

And he found he couldn't really blame her for that. He had hurt her, and he probably still was, and though his thoughts and feelings were still a confusing mess, he wished he could stop her pain. For as unsure, insecure and just confused as he was about everything, he knew, he didn't want to hurt her.

They were on unsteady ground. There were things he didn't know, and there were things she didn't know either; things he couldn't quite explain, because he didn't understand himself. But he was willing to try, and she seemed to be willing to give him a chance. He knew it would take time to get to know her again, and being at such a huge disadvantage as he was, not remembering a thing, he also knew it would take time and patience to try to figure out what to make out of this. Whether if they could pick up this relationship of theirs from where they left it or not, he didn't know, and he didn't want to jump ahead of himself quite yet.

He didn't want to make promises he wouldn't be able to keep. He didn't want to say or do things he wasn't absolutely sure he felt; she deserved better than that from him. She deserved the truth.

And right now, he didn't know what that was. So, he needed to be patient.

Everything else would have to wait a bit longer...


	22. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it!

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**21**

He stepped out of the shower, putting on the bathrobe to keep himself from getting cold and wrapping his long wet hair in a towel. Walking back into the bedroom, he opened the closet in search of something to wear.

A curious frown came to his features as he contemplated the clothes in there. It occurred to him only then, how little there was. Coats, jackets, pants, sweaters. Mostly winter clothes, and he guessed someone must have moved these clothes here -Taiki, or Haruka herself, probably- while keeping the rest of his wardrobe at the house he now knew shared with one specific tall blonde woman. Surely, they had thought this to be only a momentarily arrangement, until he would gain his memory back. And though he was still confused over the entire thing, he couldn't help but hope for that exact same thing.

With his memories back, he wouldn't feel this lost anymore.

Or so he hoped.

He shook his head, clearing his mind off such blue thoughts, taking some clean underwear to put on, and taking the bathrobe off, he then grabbed the first pair of jean pants he found, putting them on as well. Before he could get cold, he threw a blue plaid shirt on, buttoning it up half ways before turning around, walking back into the bathroom to take care of his hair, combing it and tying it up in its usual low ponytail, vaguely wondering what to do to fight off his boredom.

After calling off the rehearsals for the day, he was left with nothing to do.

He had been practicing all day the day before, and his throat and head had been particularly resentful about it when finally getting back. But he had a performance next week, and he had to not only make the necessary arrangements for the chosen songs -prior to the accident- would have a more acoustic sound to them, but now also he also had to learn said songs in the process without being too obvious about it. No one but his doctors and friends knew about his memory loss, and he preferred it that way. He trusted his manager, and he knew he could probably trust his musicians as well, but it sure felt good to be around people that didn't know. After the normal questions about how he felt after the accident, they had all treated him normally, not being caution about what they said or how they acted around him, and it felt like a small break from everything.

A little bit of normalcy in his otherwise upside down life.

Knowing beforehand about the scheduled rehearsals, he had spent the last few days listening to his own songs, memorizing the lyrics. But not knowing where the words came from, unable to relate to the tales he sang of, it had been hard for him to fully commit to the task at hand. The meeting with a certain blonde woman two days ago surely helped on that matter, so that he was a bit more prepared and informed when finally stepping into that studio the day before, but he was still unable to truly feel the words.

The songs talked about love. About holding on to that feeling, treasuring and nursing it every day, sharing moments filled with smiles, kisses, and just so much love. About how some things were just meant to be, how wonderful it felt.

They talked about her.

That much he knew. But knowing didn't help on taking the words and making them his own now, pouring meaning into the words that would left his mouth but had no recollection of ever feeling or experiencing himself. He just wasn't honest when practicing, and, apparently, his state of mind seemed to be quite obvious through his singing.

"Go home, spend some time with your woman," his second guitarist had said, teasingly. "You need to get all inspired again before coming back here."

Of course there was no way for the guitarist to know how true his words actually were. He couldn't relate to his own music, and he needed to know more. He needed to know it all, to at least try to understand and sell the story the best he could.

He needed to talk to her again.

But ignoring that small little voice in his head that told him that was not the only reason why he wanted to see her again, and knowing full well she was supposed to be resting in bed for a few days, he decided to wait a bit longer. Offering her the needed time to rest, along with some time to really think things over, giving her the chance to back out on the sort of truce they had came to the other night.

He hoped she wouldn't, though. He needed her to help him.

He shook his head, clearing his mind and contemplating the image the mirror gave back to him. Satisfied, he started to make his way back into the bedroom to finish dressing up, when the doorbell stopped him.

He frowned curiously, wondering who it could be. Though he certainly welcomed the company, knowing that, whoever it was that came to play nice friends -slash nanny- with him, would free him from his boredom, while maybe offering some more information about the eight years he couldn't remember of his life. Specially considering how they had all hid a fact he was now fully aware of, and wanted to know more.

But when he opened the door and looked into the baby blue eyes of the petite blonde woman standing there, blinking up at him, he blinked right back.

For some reason, out of all people, he hadn't quite expected her to be there. And he frowned at that thought, suddenly realizing that, with everything else going on, he hadn't really given that much thought at how things between him and the Moon Rabbit might be right now.

She was engaged to a nice enough young man that seemed to be good friends with him. Seiya himself was dating -and having a baby with- one of her best friends and zealous protectors. Usagi had never really loved him, not the way he had wanted her to, and apparently, he no longer harbored romantic feelings for her.

And he couldn't help but wonder how it all fit together now. Surely, he had had quite a few years to get used to how things were. But he no longer had the luxury of time and shared fun memories -and some not so fun, as well-, and as he looked into her baby blue eyes and that soft, kind of shy smile of hers, he couldn't help but feel an awkward atmosphere suddenly sucking them in.

.-.

"Can I come in?" she asked, when he just stood there, blinking at her.

He shook his head at her words, coming back from whatever corner of his mind he had went into.

"Sure, of course," he mumbled, gifting her with an embarrassed smile as he rubbed the back of his neck, stepping to a side and opening the door further for her to walk in.

"Am I interrupting something?" she asked, suddenly feeling awkward around him, scolding herself for showing up without checking with him first. What if he was busy? Had things to do?

"No, not at all," he assured her, chuckling nervously as he looked down on himself and to the half buttoned shirt he was wearing. "Just let me... go finish getting dress..." he trailed off, embarrassed, pointing at the general direction of the bedroom. "But come on, take a seat, make yourself comfortable," he invited, turning around and walking down the hallway. "Just give me a minute."

"Yes, of course," she said, nodding her head and walking up to the couch, taking a seat and putting the crossed body bag she brought with her next to her. "So, how have you been?" she asked, slightly raising her voice so that he would hear her.

"I'm... I'm ok," came his answer, closer than she expected, making her turn around just in time to see him walking back into the living room, throwing a sweater over his now fully buttoned shirt. "Getting used to things and trying to figure out what to do... but you know," he said, shaking a shoulder and chuckling lightly, "it's a work in progress."

"Yeah..." she agreed. "How's your head?"

"A mess."

She giggled at his blunt honesty, shrinking her shoulders. "I mean the wound," she corrected herself.

"Oh, that," he said, chuckling. "It's fine. Stitches are long gone, and it didn't get infected or anything, so that's a good thing."

"It is."

"So, what brings you here?" he asked, as he sat down on the couch across from hers.

She fidgeted with her hands nervously, letting her eyes traveled around the room for a moment. "I... I wanted to check on you," she finally answered. "To see how you're doing... I-I know I haven't been much around lately, and I'm sorry," she said, in a low, soft tone, ashamed of herself. "I don't want to bother you or anything..."

"What? Come on, you'd never bother me."

She tilted her head to a side at that, looking at him. "You know what I mean," she murmured.

She wasn't as naïve as to think things would be exactly as they were before the accident, because, well, they weren't. Not if his head was set so many years back. And some awkwardness between them was to be expected, and that was why she had been pretty much avoiding him and not being around him unless there was someone else around as well. She wasn't exactly proud of that, but she didn't want to make things worse than they already were, hurting not only him but also Haruka along the way.

The racer hadn't said anything, and Usagi knew better than to ask. But she also knew her friend, and this bizarre love geometrical figure they were suddenly sucked into was proving to be uncomfortable to all the parties involved. Even if no one was saying anything about it.

She didn't want to trouble him or make him uncomfortable in any way. But Seiya was her friend, and she did care about him. She just wanted to check on him, to see how he was doing. And see if, maybe, there was anything she could do to help.

"Yeah, I know what you mean," he agreed, nodding his head as a light tint of embarrassed red came to his cheeks. "But... we're still friends, right?" he asked, in such an unsure tone that made her blink in pure surprise.

"Of course we are!" she assured him. "It's just that... I know you're going through a lot right now, and with Mamoru and Haruka and... " she trailed off, unable to really find the words to explain herself. "I guess I just didn't want to make everything worse for everyone," she said, letting out a sigh. "But I don't want you to think I don't care about you, either," she soon added, looking straight into his midnight blue eyes.

He smiled at her then. "Hey, we've known each other for what? Nine years?" he ventured. "Give or take?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"And I know I don't remember even half of it right now, but I do remember you," he said, pointing at her and smiling. "I know you. You're probably the most caring person in the entire universe," he stated. "Trust me, I've seen most of it, so I should know."

She giggled at his statement, unable to fight the blush from rushing to her cheeks. And he looked at her, gifting her with a trusting, gentle smile that made her feel more at ease.

"Chances of you not caring about anyone are just... fat," he added. "And I know things are... complicated... right now, so I get it."

"Yeah, you could say that," she agreed, shrinking her shoulders and tilting her head to a side. "But I feel like I owe you an explanation for not being there for you."

"It's ok."

"No, it's not," she argued. "I haven't been a good friend to you through all this, and I really am sorry. But Haruka didn't want you to know about you and her yet, and I... I know I already hurt you once..."

"I'm fine, Odango," he assured her, interrupting her.

"I don't want to hurt you," she insisted.

"You're not," he said. "It's weird," he admitted, frowning, and kind of embarrassed over the entire conversation, "and you're gonna have to give me some time to adjust to what I remember and what I... feel... right now, 'cause... they're two completely different things, and it's... well, weird," he said again, chuckling in embarrassment. "But you're not hurting me."

She chewed on the inside of her cheek, frowning lightly. "This is awkward," she finally said, letting out a sigh.

"Tell me about it," he agreed, chuckling again. "This is what my life has been like for the past month or so. Fun, huh?" he joked, sarcastically.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" she asked, frowning worried.

"Stick around," he answered her, nodding his head. "Just because I'm a walking mess right now doesn't mean I don't want you around. Everything is new and weird and… there's this whole thing with Haruka and the baby and… it doesn't really make much sense to me," he explained, "and I need something to still be familiar, you know?"

She smiled at him then, noticing a small little something on that little speech of him. "I know," she said, nodding her head. "But you went from calling her Tenoh to a first name basis, so that's a good thing."

He blushed at her remark. "I think I'm well past formalities by now," he mumbled.

"Yeah," she agreed. "You're having a baby together," she added, giggling softly when his cheeks went slightly red at her comment. "And she's not determined to keep you away and in the dark anymore, so you must be doing something right."

He frowned, tilting his head up. "Am I?" he asked, rhetorically. "I seriously don't know _what_ I'm doing," he then added, admittedly. "I'm not even sure if I feel something for her or if I only _think_ I do... I know it's not the nicest thing to say, but I'm just trying to be honest, here," he said, letting out a sigh. "I'm gonna be a father, and I'm not gonna run away from that. I won't, I don't want to," he said, firmly. "But, what if I never remember? What happens then?"

"You can get to know her again," she said, smiling gently. "I know what you mean, but… don't be so hard on yourself. Give it some time."

"I can't make her wait forever."

"Do you want her to?" she asked, unable to crush down that small, hopeful smile coming to her face. "Do you want her to wait for you?"

"I…" he trailed off, frowning in a thoughtful, confused manner for a moment. "I don't want to hurt her," he finally said, after a moment of silence.

She smiled again at that. "Then don't. Just be honest with her," she advised. "I'm sure she'll understand. She's not the big, mean, ugly monster you think her to be," she added, teasingly; her smile widening when he chuckled, catching her joke. "By the way, before I forget," she then said, taking the bag resting next to her and handing it to him, "she wanted you to have this back."

He frowned curiously then, taking the offered item and opening it up. His frowned deepened as he looked up at her again. "What… I…" he trailed off, obviously confused. "What's this?" he finally asked, taking the laptop off the bag.

"I believe it's yours," she answered. "You have a lot of pictures and files and stuff in it, and it was easier to just give you Haruka's laptop instead of cleaning up yours out of evidence," she said, giving the explanation she had got from her tall friend. "But since you already know the truth, I guess she saw no point on keeping it."

He nodded his head, numbly, opening the laptop and turning it on, obviously curious. And she smiled again. The fact that he was curious about his life with Haruka, that he wanted to know about it, was, in her opinion, a good sign. Maybe there was still hope, even if he never got his memory back, and all he needed was a small little push on the right direction.

"One thing about Haruka you should know, though," she said, getting his attention again and smiling; yes, a push couldn't hurt. "Unless she has a really high fever and feels like a truck just hit her, she's terribly bad at playing patient. You may want to make sure she gets her laptop back to save her from getting bored to death," she said. "I'm sure she'd appreciate the company, too," she soon added, winking in encouragement.

Seiya's chuckle, accompanied by a slight reddish shade coming over his cheeks, only proved her right, and she smiled even more. Even if he was unsure, even if he didn't want to jump ahead of himself and make promises he didn't know if he would be able to keep, she knew him well enough to know. He cared.

He just needed to find his way back.

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><p><strong>Next on "Remember me?":<strong> "You know, you'd make a great dominatrix"


	23. Chapter 22

**Disclaimer: **All SM characters belong to the one and only, Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story, so please don't steal it!

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><p>Little threads for this broken heart.<br>It's so cold here. Little threads for this broken heart.  
>This heart...<p>

Now you see, that there's no two without three,  
>that life comes and goes, that it doesn't stop. I don't know!<br>But lie to me, tell me at least there's something left between us,  
>that in your bedroom the sun never comes out,<br>that time and pain do not exist.  
>Take me, if you want, out to lose,<br>to no destiny, with no why's.

I know, heart that does not see, heart that does not feel.  
>Heart that lies, love.<br>But you know that deep inside my soul  
>that pains remains, for believing.<br>What ever happened to the illusion?  
>To how beautiful it is to live?<br>Why did you heal me when I was hurt,  
>if today you leave me with a broken heart again?<p>

Who's gonna give me her emotions?  
>Who's gonna ask me never to leave her?<br>Who's gonna cover me tonight if it's cold?  
>Who's gonna heal my broken heart?<br>Who's gonna fill with springs this january,  
>bringing down the moon for us to play?<br>Tell me, if you leave, tell me my love,  
>who's gonna heal my broken heart?<p>

Little threads for this broken heart.

To give only that which you have in spares  
>it was never sharing, but giving charity, love.<br>After the storm, calmness comes. But after you,  
>after you there's nothing.<br>Why did you heal me when I was hurt,  
>if today you leave me with a broken heart again?<p>

Who's gonna give me her emotions?  
>Who's gonna ask me never to leave her?<br>Who's gonna cover me tonight if it's cold?  
>Who's gonna heal my broken heart?<br>Who's gonna fill with springs this january,  
>bringing down the moon for us to play?<br>Tell me, if you leave, tell me my love,  
>who's gonna heal my broken heart?<p>

**(Corazón partío - Alejandro Sanz)**

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><p><strong>22<strong>

He typed the word and pressed enter, only to have that same annoying little window popping up.

Wrong password.

He had tried every single word, code number and combination he could think of already. But nothing worked. He had absolutely no idea of what the password was to his own files. And he couldn't help but wonder what could possibly be in there, what had made him protect that one folder with a password, on his very own laptop.

The moment Usagi left his apartment, saying something about having to help Minako with her upcoming New Year party, and how they needed to get the decorations or something, he had all but jumped to the aforementioned personal computer.

Some of the files were exactly the same as those he had found on the other laptop -the one he now knew wasn't actually his-, like contracts and music folders. Though there were by far much more documents, and several different music folders. An interesting fact was that the folder containing his own music had, again, several different folders in it. The ones named after his albums, one with unreleased songs, and then all kinds of different folders with short songs, odes, solo guitars, and quite a bunch of unfinished songs. It wasn't hard to guess the extra songs were not actually album material, but things he wrote and composed all the same, probably with one specific woman in mind.

The pictures were a completely different thing. There were folder after folder naming the event where the pictures had been taken; birthday parties, vacations, trips, tours, summer weekends at the beach. Taiki, Yaten and the earthen Senshi gang were in a lot of them. One tall blonde woman was in most, except the ones he guessed she had taken herself. And again, through those pictures, he was able to see a completely different side to her.

Laughing, jumping, smiling. Hanging off from a tree with nothing but her legs and smiling to the camera, as Hotaru hugged her waist, smiling too. Laughing as she held on to his neck and shoulders while he carried her on his back, laughing along with her. Wearing an impeccable black tuxedo and smiling softly, as he stood there, in between her and a beautiful looking Michiru wearing a deep blue dress and holding her violin in one hand. Bathing in the sun, wearing a white, small two pieces swimsuit and laying down on the sand, openly using him as a pillow as they both laid there, eyes closed and obviously unaware of the picture being taken.

The curve of her hips, her flat, strong stomach, and her round, full breasts, perfectly lined by the white material, not escaping him, and he adverted his eyes away from the screen, pressing the button and closing the window.

Woman of many faces, the Haruka Tenoh he saw on those pictures was nothing like the one he remembered. Spontaneous, fun, mischievous, playful; perfectly capable of letting herself lose and be foolish and childish just for the fun of it. And quite beautiful, too, he admitted, as he contemplated the picture that was set as a wallpaper.

Laying on her stomach over the floor, hands supporting her chin and her eyes closed, she laughed happily as a puppy Kalina licked her nose. It was a really cute picture, endearing, in which he could easily see that lay back, relaxed, easy going side of her. One everyone has been telling him about, but he had only first started seeing during Christmas -before receiving the rather shocking revelations-, and during the kind of awkward, but still nice talk with her two nights ago. And it was this new side of her he was only seeing glimpses of what made him want to get to know her again. Even more so than the sultry, alluring, extremely sexual side he could easily guess from the flashing, evading memories that haunted him.

He already knew and had admitted to himself being attracted to her. She was a beautiful woman. Truly one of a kind. And if those flashes were any indication at all, she was a unique, beautiful woman that looked simply exquisite in small, laced lingerie.

Sensual, and mind blowing.

And that ghost of a goddamn sexual, teasing smile he could half see on his evading flashing memories was more than enough to set his mind on fire, down a road he was still mortified of taking. One thing was to admit -to himself- that he was attracted to her. But allowing himself to go ahead and let his imagination run wild was another, picturing her…

He shook his head, forcing that thought out of his mind.

Yes, he was attracted to her, and that was quite obvious. But, was that enough? He didn't think so. He was no expert on the area -that he could remember, anyway-, but he was sure basing an entire relationship on sex appeal was probably a recipe for disaster in the long run if there was nothing else to back it up. Surely, highly satisfactory sex was probably a great bonus to look forward to, to initiate and to keep on fueling with every single chance at intimacy. But he highly doubted he had changed so much in the past eight years that he no longer wanted -needed- something more stable and lasting than lust and desire.

Almost four years was more than enough time to cultivate and nourish something deeper. But in order to make it that long in the first place, it was obvious they had first found that something during those games they had play.

He wasn't lying to Usagi when he said he didn't want to run away. He was going to be a father, and as strange and bizarre and confusing as everything around the baby was, he was not going to walk away. But that didn't necessary mean he had to be with the mother of his child.

He didn't want to hurt her. At the very least, out of respect for the three and a half years they had shared together, he owed it to her, and to himself, to try and figure out his own feelings. To see if there really was something else or not.

Remembering Usagi's comment about a potentially bored to death car racer and the guitar waiting for him there, he closed his laptop, making up his mind.

.-.

"Please?" she asked, battling her eyelashes and putting on her best pleading, puppy eyed look, placing both her hands on the back of the couch she was confined to and looking up at him as he walked out of the kitchen.

"No," came the strong answer.

"Pretty, pretty please?"

"Ok, seriously? Stop that," came another voice, making her turn around to look at the silvery haired man sitting on one of the single sofas, right across from her. "Who are you and what did you do to the strong, proud Haruka I used to know?"

"Your friend knocked her up," she answered, arching an eyebrow. "So blame him."

"Is that the hormones talking?" he asked, teasingly.

Deciding against answering that last comment, she turned back to the tall brunette. "Can I punch him?"

"That would count as physical activity, right?" Taiki asked back, frowning in a thoughtful manner for a moment before shaking his head. "So, no, you can't."

"Aw, come on!" she groaned. "Give me _something_! I'm dying here!"

"Drama queen," the short man sang, teasingly. And then laughed off, hard, when she simply raised her hand, giving him the finger without even bothering to look his way.

"You're not dying," Taiki corrected her. "You're just bored to death."

She frowned at that. "What's the difference?"

"You're supposed to be resting," Yaten said, making her turn to look at him again. "It's bad enough you're not doing that…"

"I'm glued to the couch!" she interrupted, defending herself.

"Are you _trying_ to hurt your baby?" he asked, as it was his turn to frown now.

She pouted, crossing her arms over her stomach in a protective manner. "No," she answered, in a husky, grumpy tone.

"Then stop being such a pain in the ass, be a nice girl, and stop trying to convince us to let you leave that freaking couch you shouldn't be sitting on in the first place!" Yaten exclaimed, exasperated. "If I hear one more complaint coming from you, I swear to God I'll drag you upstairs, tie you to the bed, and then leave you there!"

She blinked, frowned, and then blinked again at his outburst, before a sided, rather amused smile came to her lips as she chuckled. "You know, you'd make a great dominatrix."

Lime green eyes blinked, as a deep, burning red came to Yaten's cheeks both at her comment, and at Taiki, as he burst out laughing, deep and loud, and so hard that he had to let himself fall over the couch next to her, suddenly unable to breathe. Which, of course, only made Yaten's face become even redder; his annoyance and humiliation at the comment increasing in waves.

"It's not that funny," he grunted, frowning, narrowing his eyes to his laughing friend.

"And, hey!" she continued, smiling widely now. "You already have the kinky leather boots to go along with that!" she teased.

That only made Taiki laugh even harder. Frowning for a moment first, probably considering if he should be offended at the boots comment or not, and then just giving in, bursting out again.

"They're not 'kinky'," the shorter man said, dangerously narrowing his eyes at her.

"Keep telling yourself that," she snorted, rolling her eyes, before shaking her head. "But, you know, it's a great thing you got those for free. I mean, I bet boots like that would cost a fortune…"

"Would you shut up already?" Yaten asked, in more of a demanding, highly insulted tone rather than a questioning one, as two silver eyebrows came together in pure exasperation.

"Is that why you're always carrying that bag around?" she asked back, completely ignoring him, and pointing at his camera bag instead. "You keep your whip on some hidden compartment, don't you?"

Taiki burst out laughing again, probably picturing some ridiculous image of the shorter man in his head. "Oh, God… please," he pleaded, in between laughter. "Stop it… can't breathe…"

She smiled cheekily at him then. "Leather boots, a whip, and a camera," she counted with her fingers, before turning back to Yaten and pointing at him. "That's kinky. Not even _you_ can deny that."

"If I had a whip right now," Yaten said, throwing daggers at her with his dangerously narrowed eyes, "I'd be slashing you with it."

"I'm a pregnant woman," she reminded him, raising a hand to her chest and plastering a shocked expression over her face.

"Yeah, well, apparently, you're still you," he said, mockingly. But then he frowned. "Is that what you do with Seiya?" he asked. "Force him into kinky boots and one of those chest harness things and then take pictures of him?"

An image of Seiya wearing said outfit, but otherwise and for some reason completely naked jumped into her head, and she frowned. Sure, she had seen him on his Senshi form, and Fighter surely knew how to wear those boots and minishorts, making one bloody sexy woman. No arguing on that one. But male Seiya with those same boots didn't quite cut. And the additional chest harness only made that mental image even weirder…

"Oh, shit, please don't answer that!" Taiki exclaimed, still laughing. "I seriously don't want to know!"

She punched his arm at that. "Masochism is not really my thing," she said, chuckling lightly, and then shaking her head. "Besides, I'm not doing anything with Seiya," she then added. "He's back to hating me, remember?"

Taiki stopped laughing the moment she said that, finally calming himself down as he looked at her, slightly frowning and tilting his head to a side. "He doesn't hate you."

"That's debatable."

"No, not really," he argued. "He's freaked out and confused, and I seriously wouldn't want to be him right now… but he wouldn't be like this if he hated you."

"He wouldn't give a crap about you if he did," Yaten reasoned, seemingly over his previous embarrassment and humiliation. "Besides" he then said, as a mocking, teasing eyebrow went up on her, "he must be doing _something_ right for you to be in such a good mood today."

"I'm not in a good mood, I'm majorly bored," she corrected him. "And you just happen to be way too easy to mess with."

"But something made you change your mind," Taiki said, raising a hand towards Yaten to shut him up before he could answer that last comment of hers. "You gave him his laptop back, right?"

"I didn't give him his laptop back," she corrected. "Usagi did."

Two pairs of eyebrows went up at that.

"Usagi?" Yaten asked, frowning now. "You sent _her_?"

"She asked," she said, shaking a shoulder, in what could be considered as an uninterested gesture, though she was sure they weren't buying it.

_Shit_, she thought to herself, letting out a sigh. Here she was, in the best mood she had been in over a month and actually enjoying a good laugh for a change, and they just had to go and remind her why she has been so miserable lately.

She knew they were worried and meant well. But she really didn't want to go down the what if road again, wondering what was going to happen and how things would turn out…

"She came to visit yesterday, and asked if it was ok for her to see him. What was I supposed to say?" she asked them, frowning. "She's been avoiding him for a _month_…"

"And we all know why," Taiki put in.

"Yes, we all know why," she agreed, nodding her head. "But if he's not getting his memory back, and quite honestly, at this point I don't think he ever will, then he has to face her sooner or later," she said, suddenly finding herself fighting down a knot in her throat.

"Yes, but…" Yaten started to argue, but the look she sent his way made him shut up.

"But what?" she asked, frowning. "He has to face the fact that she's engaged and getting married to someone else, that his feeling for her are not returned, and…" she trailed off, shaking her face and blinking the sudden moisture in her eyes away. "I can't compete with her, ok?" she finally said, letting out a long, tired sigh. "I can't. I won't."

"You're not competing," Taiki said, putting a gentle, comforting hand over hers. "He loves you," he said, unknowingly throwing salt to her wounds. "Everyone knows…"

"That's the thing, Taiki," she interrupted. "He doesn't. Not anymore. He doesn't even _know_ me," she pointed out. "And if he's serious about wanting to get to know me again, then… I need him to figure out his feelings for her first."

Letting out a long, loud whistle, Yaten rested against the back of the sofa, shaking his head. "I swear, you have iron balls."

A rather sad chuckle escaped her at that, and she shook her head, letting her eyes wander around the room.

She wasn't so sure of that.

In fact, she was terrified. She knew how confused about everything Seiya was right now. He had said so himself the other night. And though she was glad he at least wanted to be a part of the baby's life, she knew that didn't necessary lead them anywhere.

Not together, anyway.

They had ended up together by a strange twist of fate and events; by chance, really. And if she took all that away and erased it, then she wasn't really sure of what was left. Of how real it could really be between them. And she was terrified of opening herself up to him again, of letting him in, only to get hurt in the end. What if he realized his feelings for Usagi were stronger and deeper than whatever feelings he may have for her? Did he really have any feelings for her at all?

She hated being this insecure, this unsure. Not even when they first started out had she been this aware, this wary of his feelings for Usagi. Sure, they had talked about it, and maybe even argued about it when an innocent dance and a drink or two had ignited her jealously. But even then, she had known, the Moon Princess may have a privileged spot in his heart, but by the time they first started their relationship, he no longer harbored deeper feelings for her other than chaste affection and honest friendship.

But now… now that all he remembered were said feelings for her Princess, where did that leave her? Did she have a place in Seiya's heart anymore?

.-.

The sound of the bell and Kalina's loud barking filled the suddenly quiet, though stiffing air in the room, and he let out the breath he didn't realize he was holding, mentally welcoming the distraction. He much rather going back to being the center of a -humiliating- joke and have her laughing at his expense, than being in front of her watering eyes and her quivering voice, letting her fears out like that.

He seriously doubted Seiya hated her. He had seen little signs here and there, and he knew the singer well enough to know, that was not the way he acted towards someone he honestly hated.

In fact, he had never really hated her. He hadn't been fond of her either, but he was too much of an easy going guy to truly hate someone unless he had a perfectly valid reason to do so. And the tall blonde being in the way and forcing him to stay away from the object of his affections back then wasn't reason enough to hate her. Not really.

To hate her guts, maybe, but not her per say. And though Fighter's shock and anger during that last, desperate battle, when Uranus and Neptune fooled them all may had been just a product of his feelings for the Moon Princess, seeing how much such betrayal hurt her, fueled by Uranus' acid words back then, that shock and anger also showed Fighter -and therefor, Seiya- had never really hated her. Back then, Uranus had purposely pushed all the wrong buttons, and Fighter delivered, just as the blonde warrior had expected. And that sort of truce between them, the way she had trusted her Princess to them -to Fighter-, and how shaken the black haired Light had been at the fallen Senshi of the Winds, questioning her actions and then all but ordering her to stay, served as yet another proof.

True, watching the fearless warrior fall like that hadn't exactly been a fun ride. Nothing about that battle was. But if anything, that interaction between the two proved they've never really hated each other. They just dislike and annoyed one another to no ends when on civil form; they were both proud and quite stubborn, and after everything was said and done, after it was finally over, they had been more than happy to just go on their own, separate ways, not finding a reason as to why they should even bother on getting to know each other better.

So, no, he highly doubted Seiya hated her now. They had just started off with the wrong foot, and never really saw a reason to make amends.

And though that love that surprised them all was something Seiya didn't remember ever happening, again, he had seen signs here and there to know, Seiya might not understand the how's and why's, but that dislike and annoyance was just not there anymore. The furtive looks he would throw her way when he thought no one was looking back at Makoto's birthday party, slightly more evident during their small Christmas celebration; his crystal clear concern when she fainted that night at the dance club; the way he had jumped up to help her and defend her when those robbers attacked her, and the painfully evident concern when she was rushed to the hospital. Though his concern that day had been short lived, replaced by shock. But he couldn't really blame the guy for that.

He has seen all those little signs before Seiya found out the truth. And that was certainly not the way he acted when he honestly hated someone. Not by a long shot.

Did it mean he was still in love with her? He wasn't sure. He acted nothing like the way he used to act back when he had the biggest crush on a certain little rabbit. But then again, whenever Haruka was involved in the picture, Seiya's behavior was everything but normal. He never saw it coming the first time around, after all.

But what made it different this time was the fact that he knew his friend was attracted to the tall blonde. Whether he was ready -and willing- to admit it or not. Neither one of them was keen on sharing their private life, and though he was still curious to know how exactly did they ended up having a _common_ private life in the first place, there were certain details he definitively didn't want to know. But just because he was unaware of the insides of their relationship, it didn't mean he was blind enough not to see the chemistry between them.

But Haruka had a point.

He knew perfectly well, and first hand, how hard it had been for Seiya to get over Usagi. Maybe it was because it all happened at once; Mamoru coming back into the picture, Kakyuu's starseed never coming back to life, and the war ending only to leave the three of them lost, not knowing what to do or where to go. Whatever the reason, it had taken Seiya years to get over it. Being away from her, traveling around the universe for a couple of years, and then coming back to earth and finding her obviously happy with her Prince had helped, along with him drowning on his career and the making of his first solo album. And maybe an occasional lady friend or two.

As Taiki stood up from the couch to go and get the door, he let out a sigh; lime green eyes going back to a now calmer blonde woman.

By the time she came into the picture, Seiya's heart had been free for her to claim. And boy, did she claim it. And though by then he was long over his crush on Usagi, his heart still cried over losing Kakyuu.

They all did, but Seiya had taken it particularly hard. And as he looked at those now clear green eyes of hers as she called out to Kalina, for once being a nice girl and not moving from her spot on the couch, Yaten knew, without a doubt, she had been the one finally healing Seiya's heart. Returning his feelings with the same strength and passion she had previously delivered her witty, highly annoying retorts. Making him laugh, smile, sing, dream, like no one ever had before. In the most surprising, unexpected way, the racer turned out to be exactly what Seiya needed to go back to what he used to be before everything fell apart, to embrace life and everything it would throw his way, living it, looking forward to what tomorrow may bring, instead of just making it through each day, wondering if it would ever get better.

And he could only hope Seiya would stop freaking out on every single new discovery so that he could see that. Because with his memory loss, his stubbornness, his shocked; with this distance between them, he was not only hurting her. He was hurting himself, too.

They were both miserable. And he hoped it was only a matter of time before Seiya realized, being apart from her was the real reason why he was so lost.

A small smile came to his lips the moment he looked up, staring at the person Taiki had just opened up the door for. Taking in the still troubled look, the slight shyness dancing somewhere in there, and the unsure way he carried himself, opposite to his usual proud, head held high stance, Yaten shook his head, letting out a sigh. Either Haruka's plan worked wonderfully and he had finally figured out his feelings for Usagi, or he was just as confused as ever and was here to see and compare, to try and figure out which blonde he cared for more.

Either way, and as much as he seriously wanted to kick the guy for hurting her like this -he had, after all, came to really care for the racer over the years, considering her a part of their small, unique family-, he took his cue to leave, knowing that, on certain matters, it was best not to get involved.


	24. Chapter 23

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But this story belongs to me, so please don't steal it.

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Big, big sorry for taking so long to update this. But like I said in another update for another story of mine, it seems my muse ditched me...

Answering a few reviews:

**nequam-tenshi**: well, the main characters on this one are the Outers and the Starlights. There will be some Inner parade (literally) later on, but not that much, sorry. And no, no Ami-Taiki or anything like that. I usually hate non-canon couples, and this Haruka-Seiya thing is more of a... shamefull little pleasure of mine. But that's about it, sorry.

**Beren**: well, thank you! And I know what you mean about characters being out of character. For some weird reason, I've found quite a lot of those lately. I believe every fan/writer/reader sees the characters in their own way, and I respect that, but I also believe there's some basic ground that just can't be touched or else it's a completely different character... anyway! Glad to know you're enjoying this so far!

**Berrycherrybaby:** sent you a pm. Hope you don't mind.

Anyway! Hope you guys like this new chap

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><p>When will I see you again?<br>You left with no goodbye.  
>Not a single word was said,<br>no final kiss to seal any sins.  
>I had no idea the state we were in.<p>

I know I have a fickle heart,  
>and a bitterness and a wandering eye<br>and a heaviness in my head

But don't you remember?  
>Don't you remember<br>the reason you let me in before?  
>Baby, please remember me once more.<p>

When was the last time you thought of me?  
>Or have you completely erased me from your memory?<br>I often think about where I went wrong.  
>The more I do the less I know.<p>

[…] Gave you the space so you could breathe.  
>I kept my distance so you would be free,<br>and hope that you find the missing piece  
>to bring you back to me.<p>

But don't you remember?  
>Don't you remember<br>the reason you let me in before?  
>Baby, please remember me once more.<p>

When will I see you again?

**(Don't you remember - Adele)**

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><p><strong>23<strong>

The moment he walked in, Kalina jumped right up to him, happily. More prepared this time, he was fast to catch her paws right on before she could really make him stumble backwards with her clumsy, strong jump.

"Hey, girl," he greeted her, petting the dog's head and smiling into happy looking blue eyes, tongue hanging out and tail wagging all the while.

Looking up and into the living room, and completely ignoring Taiki's arched, questioning eyebrow at his familiarity with Kalina, his eyes landed on the blonde sitting over the double sofa. One arm resting on the back, and surprised green eyes looking right back into his own blue ones.

"Hi."

"Hi," she greeted back. "I uh... wasn't expecting you..."

It wasn't hard for him to read the silent, lingering 'so soon' in her words and in her eyes. Just like it wasn't hard to guess she hadn't exactly shared with Taiki and Yaten the little chat they have had the other night, judging by their curious eyes, carefully studying them both.

It had surprised him, seeing Taiki's car parked outside when he got here. And though it was nice to know they all got along and seemed close now, considering he had been dating this woman for over three years and they were having a baby together, the image of a broken blonde crying in Taiki's arms had, for some reason, jumped into his mind's eye at the sight of his car. Surely, they were there to check on her and maybe comfort her, just like Taiki had done that day, at Makoto's. But he couldn't shake the prick of jealousy that assaulted him, as disturbing as that was, thinking he should be the one doing that, not Taiki.

He shook his head, clearing his head and taking a step forward. "Usagi said you may want this back," he said, gesturing to the bag hanging from his shoulder.

"I wonder if I want to know what's in there," came Yaten's comment, in a mocking tone Seiya didn't understand.

And it wasn't hard for him to know he was obviously missing something. The killer look the blonde sent Yaten's way was hard to miss.

"Did I come in a bad moment?" he asked, frowning, curiously.

"No, not at all," Taiki said, shaking his head. "We were just leaving."

"Right," Yaten agreed, nodding his head and standing up from the sofa he was sitting on. "Just make sure she doesn't leave that couch," he then added, looking at him.

"Don't forget your whip," was Haruka's strange comment; green eyes narrowing to the shorter man for a split of a second, before a wide, satisfied smile came to her face.

"Bitch," Yaten growled under his breath.

"Dwarf," she growled back, now arching a half offended, all the way cocky eyebrow at him.

"I seriously don't understand what you ever saw in her," the lime green eyed man said, this time to him, as he rolled his eyes in an exasperated manner, flickering his ponytail off his shoulder.

"Alright!" Taiki exclaimed, getting in between the couch and the shorter man, successfully avoiding any possible flying objects to reach the man and start some sort of fight between the two. "Leaving," he said, jerking from the sleeve of Yaten's sweater and all but dragging him to the door. "We are leaving."

And he just stood there, watching the two making all the way to the door, putting on their coats and then walking out. Blinking, a frown came to his features; he had obviously missed something here, and he wasn't sure he wanted to find out what that was, as he had the slight suspicious it had something to do with one of the many, many things he didn't remember.

"I never knew he could turn into such a control freak," Haruka's voice made him turn back to her in time to see her gesturing to one of the now empty sofas for him to sit down.

He blinked at the comment, before shaking his head, somewhat amused. "Guess you don't know him that well, then," he said, chuckling lightly, as he sat down on the pointed sofa.

She shook a shoulder at that. "I do know _you_ well enough to know," she said, in a rather knowing it all tone, "I'm not the only one who seriously feels like kicking him every now and then."

Again, he chuckled. "The guy can be annoying," he defended himself, shrinking his shoulders.

She snorted. "No kidding," she mumbled, rolling her eyes, before a gentle smile made it to her lips when Kalina walked up to her, resting her head over the blonde's knee.

Bright blue eyes looking up at her, the blonde chuckled, tapping the empty spot right next to her on the couch. And that was all the dog needed to jump right in, turning a few times around the spot before finally laying down, openly using the tall woman's legs as a pillow, and seemingly enjoying the long fingers now stroking the silvery fur at her sides.

And he smiled at the pretty picture they made, curled over the couch. Again, he was surprised at this new side of the racer. He was sure she would probably rather be up and around as she pleased instead of being grounded to that couch. But still. He had always thought her to be the tough, hard, rough around the edges, always on guard kind of girl. And yet here she was now, proving him wrong by simply being there, laid down and homely, petting her dog. Not looking that tough or hard at all -though he knew, pregnant or not, she was still capable of breaking anyone's nose with just one fast right hook-, and definitively not needing any polishing.

She was just... her. And right now, he was not only quite aware of the fact that he didn't know her at all, but he was also curious to find out who Haruka Tenoh really was.

"So," he said, getting her attention again and making green orbs look up at him. "I just came to give you your laptop back."

She frowned at that, in what he could only guess was a curious way. "I thought you said you wanted to chat..." she pointed out.

"I do," he said, nodding his head. "Is just that... I don't even know where to start," he admitted. "I mean, just by looking at all the pictures in my laptop I can see there's this whole..." he trailed off, unsure of how to phrase it without hurting her feelings or sounding like complete idiot. "Suddenly I found out I have a life with you, and it's _you,_" he said, shrinking his shoulders while pointing at her with his hands. "And I thought I knew you, I thought I knew who you are. But the truth is, I don't. It's like I'm seeing you for the first time, and it's... it's overwhelming."

She chewed on her inner cheek for a moment. Resting her back comfortably against the couch, she crossed her arms over her chest, tilting her head to a side and looking at him, as if contemplating what he just said and what to tell him now.

She finally let out a sigh, uncrossing her arms and running a hand through her short locks. "I'm sorry for keeping you in the dark like that."

Seiya blinked, surprised at her apology. "It's ok, I understand," he said, rubbing the back of his neck in a rather embarrassing way. "I'm sorry for being an ass to you," he apologized. "I didn't know, I… I'm sorry for hurting you. I really am."

She shook her shoulder at his words. "It's not like it's your fault."

"I know. But still…"

"I knew what to expect," she was fast to say, before he could say anything else. "When I decided not to tell you, I knew what to except. I mean, we weren't exactly friends back then, and if I were in your place, I'd…" she trailed off for a moment, scratching the back of her head a as a half apologetic, half sheepish sided grin came to her lips. "Well, I'd probably be a whole lot worse than you."

He couldn't help but chuckle, fully and openly agreeing with her. "Yeah. I'm not the one who's pregnant, here."

She chuckled too. "Oh, I'd definitively kill you," she admitted, nonchalantly. "But that's not why I did it," she soon added, as once more that kind of shy, nervous demeanor he had seen in her the other night came back. "You were in a coma for two weeks. I just found out about the pregnancy, and I was scared, and I…" she closed her eyes then, unable to keep his gaze or fighting with herself, with her own demons and emotions, he couldn't tell. "I kept praying for you to wake up, and when you did…"

"I understand, you don't have to..."

"No, you don't understand," she interrupted him again, shaking her head and opening her eyes again, looking straight into his midnight blues. "It's not just me you forgot. It's everything," she said, raising her hands up in the air for emphasis. "You woke up thinking the war with Galaxia is still on, having feelings for Usagi and trying to find Kakyuu, only to be told it's eight years later, and _everything_ is different now."

He shifted on his seat, feeling both uncomfortable and lost upon the mention of his dead Princess. With everything else going on, the one thing that was hurting him the most had took second place, and now here she was, bringing it up.

He knew she was not trying to hurt him on purpose. The look in her eyes, sincere, transparent, and even hurt, told him that much.

"I know how much Usagi meant to you," she said, in that soft, husky voice of hers, an indescribable look upon green eyes, and rising up a hand the moment he moved to speak again. "I'm not judging you, I'm not accusing you of anything. Is the truth," she stated. "You had strong feelings for her. Strong enough to risk your own life for her. And you have no idea how thankful I am for that. For keeping her safe when I couldn't, when everyone and everything else failed."

The words made his heart sunk, and he frowned, confused. "What do you mean 'you failed'?" he asked, fearing the answer. For some reason, the answer to that question scared him.

A sad, small sided smile came to her lips then, as she shrunk her shoulders. "You don't wanna remember that," she said, scratching the back of her neck. "It wasn't pretty."

His frown deepened then, as that hollow feeling inside that attacked him every time he remembered Kakyuu was gone came back, full force.

He could think of several different reasons as to why he was bothered by her words. But the truth was, the idea of losing her hurt. Not because he knew how much she meant to Usagi and the girls -he did-, not because he was aware of what a strong, magnificent Senshi she made -he was. But because the idea of losing her, just like that, the same way he had lost Kakyuu, left him with a bitter taste.

"After the war ended, the stolen Starseeds were freed," she continued. "Some returned, like Mamoru and the girls…"

"And you," he added for her, not really needing her to confirm or deny anything.

She took a deep breath at that, barely nodding her head. "And me," she said, in a soft, husky whisper. "But others didn't," she then added. "I don't know why, and I wish I had an answer to give to you, but I don't have any. Usagi wanted to help, to use the Ginzuishou… but to do that, she would have had to use its full power…"

"That would have killed her," he said, alarmed at even the mention of such idea.

"I know," the blonde said, with a solemn, serious, yet kind of sad expression over her features. "We would have helped her, of course, landing her our powers," she explained further. "We've done it before."

"But it's still dangerous," he pointed out, with a serious frown of his own over his features, knowing full well the risks of the Moon Princess dying while concentrating her Senshi's powers within her.

They could all die, in the blink of an eye.

She just nodded her head, giving him a rather sad smile. "That's why you didn't let her," she simply said. "None of you did," the blonde said; the seriousness in her eyes being replaced with sadness, understanding and pain. "I guess you guys didn't want us to have to go through the same as you, and figured if she didn't return after the Starseeds were freed, then… I don't know, it must've been fate or something."

He nodded his head, numbly, agreeing with her guess. It didn't make the fact that his Princess was gone any easier, but it was the truth. Adding more deaths would have only made things worse.

Much, much worse.

"After a while you guys left," she continued. "To Kinmoku first, then traveled around. And then you came back a couple of years later, and started a new life here. You moved on. But you never forgot," she said, in a low, understanding tone that held no mockery or pity. "You have a tattoo as a tribute to her, you're still mourning her," she pointed out. "Even with all your memories intact, you're still mourning her. So I know how much you're going through right now."

"It's a lot to process," he conceded, nodding his head. Eyebrows going up and taking a deep breath as he did so.

"I know," she agreed, nodding her head too. "I know things are not exactly easy for you right now, and I didn't want to add to what you're already dealing with."

He let out a sigh, processing the words she had just said.

It was exactly what Yaten and Taiki told him that day, back at the hospital. And if he was absolutely honest with himself, it did make sense. He was having a hard time dealing with Kakyuu's death, dreaming about her almost every night. He did jump right into the old verbal fight habit he and the racer used to have eight years ago.

As for his feelings, he wasn't sure. He knew he didn't feel the same about Usagi. He had figured that out even before finding out the truth. Though confusing at first, it did make more sense now that he knew. But as far as how he felt, that was about all he had figured out so far.

He wasn't justifying her decision to keep him in the dark, and he wasn't sure of how he would react if he were in her shoes. But he did understand; he could see where her decision came from.

"I don't want to be another..."

"Can I be honest?" he asked, interrupting her before she could say anything else. "I mean, brutally honest?"

Green eyes blinked at him then, and she nodded her head.

"I really don't know what to do here," he finally said, after a moment of silence. "I mean, you're right, everything's messed up right now, and... and half the times I feel like I'm just... stumbling in the dark."

"I'm sorry..."

"No, no, it's not you," he was fast to say. "I mean, it is you, but not like that," he said, running his hands through his hair when she simply blinked at him, obviously confused. "I don't know... how I feel about you," he finally said, admittedly. "I don't. And it's like walking on glass, because at any moment I could say or do something and fuck up whatever chance I've got to figure this out and see if..."

"See if what?" she asked, when he kept silent for a moment.

He looked at her then, trying to find the right words, praying for her to understand the truth in his eyes. "I really don't wanna hurt you," he finally said. "I'm attracted to you. That much I know," he admitted. "And it's weird, because it's _you_, and I'm not used to... seeing you like this," he said, standing up from the couch and starting to walk around. "But then, it isn't that weird because, well... you're hot," he said, turning back to her and looking straight at her green eyes and her reddening cheeks. "I mean, if all those pictures and these... flashes... are any indication, then... you know..." he mumbled. "I know I sound like a jerk right now, but... you're hot," he said again, chuckling nervously. "You're a beautiful woman. And if things were different, then yes, I'd love to go ahead and see where this is going."

She blinked at him then, frowning. "You would?"

"Why is that so surprising to you?" he asked back, curiously.

"Well, because..." she mumbled, blushing yet again. "It's eight years ago you, and... you know..."

He chuckled at that. "And we're back to the weird part," he pointed out, nodding his head.

She scratched the back of her neck then, awkwardly. "Yeah..."

Letting out a sigh, he walked the distance, taking a seat on the coffee table right in front of her. He was just about to take her hands in his, but stopped himself in mid air, running his hands through his hair instead. "You see why this is so confusing?" he asked, hoping, praying for her to understand. "I would love to have the chance to figure things out and see if I... if _we_ can make this work. To see if I really do have feelings for you, or if I only think I do because everyone keeps telling me how great we were together."

She lowered her face at that, and a sad smile made it to his lips. She could really be awfully cute at times. But, was that enough?

Putting a hand under her chin, he gently forced her to look up at him again. "I can't just jump on and wait and see," he said, looking straight into suddenly embarrassed, fearful green eyes. "I don't have that luxury right now. It's not fair to you, and I don't want to hurt you."

She let out a sigh; green eyes traveling around the room for a moment, before landing back on his midnight blues. "So what now?" she finally asked.

"I don't know," he answered, in all honesty. "I can't really promise you anything. But I don't want you to push me away, either..."

"I..."

"You said it's not enough, and you're right," he said, raising up a hand to gently shut her up before she could say anything. "It's not. And it's not fair. I feel as if you're the one holding the key for me to understand... everything, and really, how fair is that?"

She frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I have this show next week..."

"I know."

"And I'm trying to sell a story I don't even know myself," he explained, unable to fight off the half smile coming to his lips when a tint of red came to her cheeks once more. "For the first time since I can remember, I can't connect with my own music, and it bugs me. And..."

The phone ringing interrupted him, and the blonde sent an apologetic smile his way before picking up the back cordless phone resting right next to him on the coffee table.

"Sorry," she mumbled, before answering the call.

He nodded his understanding, taking the distraction to look at his wristwatch, only now realizing it was starting to get late. It was going to get dark soon, and he knew the blonde sitting in front of him now needed to rest.

"Oh, hi," Haruka's husky voice said into the phone, and he looked up at her again. "Define 'we'," the blonde then said, frowning. "This really isn't necessary... I am! Seriously, this is..." green eyes rolled at whoever was on the other side of the line, and he couldn't help but chuckle at the blonde's rather exasperated expression. "Ok, fine! Yeah, whatever. See ya."

She hung up, letting out a sigh and throwing the cordless phone to a side over the couch. And he chuckled, kind of amused at her suddenly annoyed mood.

"What was that?" he asked, curiously.

"Nothing. Just the entire world getting into nanny mode on me," she said, shaking her head and taking another deep breath. "Anyway! You were saying?"

Again, he chuckled, lightly shaking his head. "It's getting late," he said, looking at her again. "I should get going, and you need to rest."

"Please, not you too," she said, almost begging. "It's bad enough with everyone else getting all motherly on me..." she trailed off, rolling her eyes, making him chuckle yet again.

"They mean well," he pointed out. "And you do need to rest. It's a medical fact."

One blonde eyebrow went up at that. "When did you get a PhD?"

"It's common knowledge," he defended himself. "You need to rest."

She rolled her eyes, shaking her head and mumbling something under her breath he didn't quite catch. And considering she was currently on a rather annoyed mood, he figured it was probably better if he didn't know what she was grouching about.

"And I need to get going," he said, moving to stand up from the coffee table he was still sitting on.

But as he did so, green eyes looked up at him, and her next words froze him on the spot.

"You could stay here."


	25. Chapter 24

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story, so please don't steal it!

**.**

* * *

><p><strong>24<strong>

"In the guest room," she was fast to add, the moment deep blue eyes blinked at her, in nothing but pure surprise.

There was a bit of awkwardness dancing in there as well, judging by that tint of red coming to his cheeks. And she regretted her words, even if she did have several different reasons as to why she wanted him to spend the night over. This being his house as well and her missing him beyond words were high on the list, of course.

But then there was the fact that he was right; it was getting late, night would fall soon. And the guy just had an accident. The roads and streets were frosty, and she didn't really feel at ease knowing he was out there driving around. Granted, he hadn't been the one behind the wheel when it happened, but still.

"You could use the guest room," she added, shaking her shoulder and trying to act nonchalantly.

He chuckled, nervously scratching the back of his neck, fighting the red from his cheeks. "I... I don't want to intrude you or anything..."

"It's your house too," she pointed out. "It's late, and it's getting dark, and you said you need to focus on your music, right? You have the space to do that here, and, I don't know, maybe being here helps?" she ventured, frowning for a moment, before she remembered the phone call she just answered and a small smile came to her lips. "While keeping me company and saving me from boredom and the cavalry."

He blinked, confused. "The what?"

Her smiled widened then, turning into her trademark sided, cocky smile. "Here's a little something you don't remember knowing," she said. "Sets can get really bossy at times, and her motherly complex is just... insane," she said, rolling her eyes in pure exasperation. "Michi can be quite the control freak. Mina has this really weird frustrated nurse wannabe fantasy, and between you and me, she kinda sucks at it."

He laughed at her little tale, probably picturing their friends in his head. And she knew, even if he didn't remember a thing from the past eight years, he probably didn't find it that hard to imagine that, considering how his rich, deep laugh rumbled through the room.

God, she missed to hear him laugh...

She shook her head, dismissing that last thought and pushing it aside, getting back to the subject at hand instead. "And even Ami went from being the nice, cute little blue thing she usually is to be on doctor mode on me twenty four seven," she continued. "Don't get me wrong, I love them all to death. I do. But..."

"They're driving you nuts," he finished for her.

She couldn't help it. She tried, but she just couldn't, and a whine escaped her, as green eyes went wide opened. "You have _no_ idea."

He chuckled, shaking his head. Slightly tilting his head to a side, he looked at her, arching an eyebrow. "You sure?"

She let out a sigh at the question. "Honestly? I'm not sure of anything right now," she said, bluntly. "It just seemed like a good idea," she justified herself. "I mean, it's not like there's anything you may need in the morning that you don't already have here. Clean clothes, toothbrush. You could even take a shower, if you want," she listed. "And between Sets and Mako, there's enough food for an entire army here, so..."

Again, he chuckled at her joke, though it really wasn't a joke at all. Between the Guardian of Time's motherly complex kicking in full time, and the Amazon's new favorite excuse to come by and make all kinds of food and dishes, Haruka was sure she could throw a dinner party, and still have enough food to last a week afterwards.

"Have you had your dinner?" he suddenly asked, frowning.

She shook her head, frowning at the way her stomach suddenly decided to rebel itself against her at the mere idea of eating anything right on that moment. "I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat," he said, in a rather scolding tone.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm eating for two," she said, rolling her eyes. "I already know the speech," she complained. "But the whole point of eating is to keep the food in my stomach. And right now, I really don't think I'd be able to do that," she said, putting a hand over her stomach and frowning, already feeling like throwing up just by thinking about it. "I'll eat when I'm hungry," she assured him, standing up from the couch she had been grounded to earlier that day. "Right now I'm more tired than anything."

She frowned at her own words. It was amazing how tired she was lately. And she wasn't even doing anything at all. Quite literally.

Both Ami and Setsuna said something about pregnant women being more tired and sleepy than usual during the first trimester. But this was just ridiculous.

"Then go to bed."

"I can show you around first."

.-.

Though she said it in a somewhat knowing all tone he was quite used to hearing in her husky voice, there was a subtly shy undertone to it. And something in the way she said that, and the look upon her eyes told him she really did want him to stay.

And a part of him felt relieved at the realization. Because, considering everything that was going on, their conversations, and her saying -or rather, yelling- at him to leave her alone, he had been right. She didn't want him to go away.

She missed him.

And knowing that, even if she was putting up a mask, not showing herself openly, it made him feel better. For as weird as it all was, knowing she cared put him at ease. And she wasn't even expecting him to jump right in and for things to be exactly the way they used to be, the way he didn't remember. All she was asking was for him to stay under the same roof. As if having him around put her at ease.

And, well, someone had to be around just in case she may want or need something. She was supposed to be resting, after all.

"Fine, you win."

The smile that came to the blonde's features then was radiant. Small, and always sided, but radiant all the same. It illuminated her face, her green eyes shining proudly in her face, before she finally fought it off, biting on her lower lip instead, and then turning around. And with a wave of her hand and a shook from her head, she gestured for him to follow her, as they made the way to the stairs, up the second story.

She showed him the guest room, opening the door for him to take a look inside, before she led him down the hall, down to the last, double door. And Seiya shoved his hands into his pockets, mindlessly nodding his head while letting his eyes take in his surroundings. The strangest of feelings taking over him as he walked into the main bedroom, following the tall blonde as she was saying something about clothes and a shower he didn't quite catch as his blue eyes landed on the perfectly made king size bed with dark blue covers and matching pillows.

The decoration and furniture was nice, but simple. The room, spacious and probably light during the day, was set on white and blue colors. A white, soft carpet, and the white night tables; the light and the book he had giving her for Christmas resting over the one on the right, and another light and a cordless black phone on the other. White silk curtains framed the large window that led to a small balcony he guessed presented an amazing view of the gardens, and then a thicker fabric, in blue, meant to block the sunlight when wanted.

Right across the bed, next to the double door, a white tall boy showed proudly a small wooden, carved jewelry box and two frames as the only decoration, resting on top of it. The smiling faces on those pictures got him.

They were pictures of them, of the couple they used to make, and he stopped for a moment, taking one of the frames and looking at it.

He was wearing a gray t-shirt with some sort of logo on it, and washed out jeans, held in place by a black stained belt. She was wearing a white loosen t-shirt, a dark green hoodie over it, and pencil jeans hanging low on her hips, with a black leather belt he guessed was there more as an accessory than out of need. There were some sort of VIP passes hanging from their necks, as he held an arm around her thin waist and she hung an arm around his neck, both of them giving a rock n' roll sign with their free hands.

"That was last year," her voice made him look up at her, finding her standing right next to him, smiling down at the picture he held in his hands. "At the Fuji Rock Festival."

He arched both eyebrows at that. "Sounds like fun."

She chuckled, nodding her head. "It was," she said, in a low, soft tone, as if she was remembering something. But she soon shook herself off, taking a step backwards and pointing at the sliding doors on the other side of the room. "Anyway, clean clothes, towels, toothbrush, shaving lotion…" she said, now walking the distance and opening the door. "Everything's in here. Bathroom is that way," she then said, pointing at an opened door at the end of the rather large walk in closet.

He followed her as she pointed at the drawers and hangers that obviously held his clothes -the ones that were not back at the apartment downtown-, and he nodded his understanding, as a part of his mind was elsewhere. That feeling that attacked him the moment he got to the second floor and walked down that hallway getting stronger now. A vague sense of familiarity invaded him, and it made him feel out of place, as if walking into a dream or something.

He couldn't quite explain it. It just felt... strange. Standing there, on that walk in closet, staring at all the clothes. Blazers, pants, jackets, coats, shirts, shoes. And though most of the clothes in there were either male or what one could call unisex, there were definitively some very feminine items as well; high heeled boots and shoes, a few skirts and dresses. And he couldn't help but think there were surely some more -definitively feminine- clothes on the small drawers in there as well, and he was thankful when the blonde pointed one out for him, indicating his clean underwear was in there and saving him from having to go drawer to drawer.

She handed him clean pajamas for him to wear to bed and he took it, nodding his thanks, when something else caught his eye.

A sided smile coming to his lips as his fingers brushed against the neatly folded green fabric. "Is this what I think it is?"

"That's mine."

The overly sweet, nonchalant, kind of mocking tone in her words made him look up at her, arching a questioning eyebrow her way. He clearly remembered wearing that when he played for the team back in high school, and even the number on it was the same.

"You lost your claim over it years ago, buddy," she simply said, shaking her shoulder and completely dismissing any possible argument.

A flash of the blonde racer wearing that same shirt and otherwise half naked dancing on the kitchen, the same one that had assaulted him just a few days ago, came rushing to his mind, along with the strangely vivid memory of soft, full breasts pressed against his chest, and an involuntary shiver ran down his spine. He shook his head, trying to clear his mind off naked breasts, and let go of the football shirt, commanding himself not to fall victim of his curiosity; the tale of how exactly he lost claim over his own football shirt was something he suspected he was not ready to find out quite yet.

"Ok… I'll leave you to rest, then," he said, lightly nodding his head. "Thanks for the pj's."

"No problem," she said, nodding her head in return. "I'll be here if you need anything…"

"I'm sure I'll be alright," he said, smiling gently, as they both stepped out of the closet. "Now you call me if you need something, ok?" he added, pointing a finger and putting on his best scolding tone. "No walking around or taking midnight trips to the diner."

Green eyes rolled at him, and she waved her hands in front of him, pretty much pushing him out of the room. "Yeah, yeah, just go to bed already."

He chuckled, shaking his head, before smiling gently again. "Have a good night."

She returned the smile then, folding her hands behind her back and slightly tilting her head to a side. "You too."

Stepping out of the room, he closed the door behind him, both out of respect and in order to give her some sense of privacy, and made his way to the room that had been pointed to him just a few moments ago.

The room was warm enough, which told him the heat was obviously on, but not too much as to suffocate him. Just the right temperature.

The double bed was simple, and it seemed quite new, but a simple test, as he sat on the edge, proved it to be comfortable enough. To the head was a window, and upon opening the curtains, he found he preferred it that way, so that he could look up at the night sky while keeping the window close.

Turning on the light on the night table, he took his clothes off, folding them and resting them over the chair next to a small desk, as his midnight blues took in the painting hanging from one of the walls. It was a magnificent scenery, with the waving ocean crushing against a cliff, and a bright white moon shining in the night sky, and a closer look and the small signature on the bottom told him it was one of Michiru's work. Not that it surprised him; he knew the violinist was quite the talented artist.

But the painting brought another thought to his mind; one that, surprisingly enough, he hadn't even contemplated before.

The violinist and the racer had a history together. It was quite obvious that was in the past, yet they remained closed friends, and he couldn't help but wonder how did that work exactly. Why had they broken up, and when exactly? Just as finding himself in front of Usagi earlier that day had been awkward, he wondered if maybe him being with the racer, and Michiru being close to her still, had ever been awkward as well.

The aquamarine mermaid was still quite protective of the blonde, that much was obvious. But as he contemplated the painting, and considering everything that had happened in the past few years -or at least the events he was aware of-, he couldn't help but be glad that, for whatever reasons, the strong, proud Outers were not an item anymore.

If things would have been different, there wouldn't be a new life growing inside Haruka's womb. And for as confusing and mind numbing as everything was, as weird and strange as everything felt, he couldn't find it in himself to ever regret that.

.

.

* * *

><p><strong>A.N.:<strong> Sorry for the shorty! I promise I'll make it up next chap! (ok, I *hope* to make it up next chap...). Things are slowly but steadily starting to move... somewhere :)

**Coming up next:** "You have to go back, Seiya. Go back to her. To the life you've built for yourself, with her"

aaaaand:

"Hey, I know I don't remember much, but I do know it takes two to tango"


	26. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer:** all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story, so please do not steal it!

.

* * *

><p>You're only just a dreamboat<br>sailing in my head.  
>You swim my secret oceans<br>of coral blue and red.  
>Your smell is incense burning,<br>your touch is silken yet.  
>It reaches through my skin<br>moving from within,  
>clutches at my breast.<p>

But it's only when I sleep  
>I see you in my dreams.<br>You got me spinning round and round  
>turning upside down.<br>But I only hear you breathe  
>somewhere in my sleep<br>You got me spinning round and round  
>turning upside down.<br>But it's only when I sleep.

And when I wake from slumber  
>your shadow's disappeared.<br>Your breath is just the sea mist  
>surrounding my body.<br>I'm working through the daytime  
>but when it's time to rest<br>I'm lying in my bed,  
>listening to my breath,<br>falling from the edge.  
>But it's only when I sleep.<p>

**[…]**

Up in the sky where angels fly  
>I'll never die, Hawaiian High.<br>In bed I lie, no need to cry  
>my sleeping cry, Hawaiian High.<p>

It reaches through my skin  
>moving from within,<br>clutches at my breast.

But it's only when I sleep  
>I see you in my dreams.<br>You got me spinning round and round  
>turning upside down.<br>But I only hear you breathe  
>somewhere in my sleep<br>You got me spinning round and round  
>turning upside down.<br>But it's only when I sleep.

**(Only when I sleep - The Corrs)**

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><p><strong>25<strong>

He was running.

It was dark, and the mute sound of his own feet meeting the cold floor was deafening. He had no idea of where he was, but he knew he needed to get out of there. He was lost, and he just wanted to find his way back.

So he kept on running, desperate to hear anything but his own heartbeat bumping on his ears. But whatever it was he was hoping to find, to hear, to reach, when a voice finally entered his mind, it surprised him to no ends, making his heart stop dead on his chest; his feet suddenly glued to the ground, as his eyes looked all around the reigning darkness.

"Princess?"

"You shouldn't be here," came her voice again, clear and loud. "You need to go back."

He narrowed his eyes, trying to see through the dark, trying to find the owner of such soft, loving voice. "Where are you?" he asked, when his search turned out futile. "I can't see you… I can't see anything!"

"I'm right here. I'm always right here, with you."

The closeness of her voice made him turn around. And finally, there she was. Hands fold in front of her, wearing her royal dress, just like he had seen her so many times before. Her red, long hair tied up in its usual style, dancing in the silent wind, and that loving, caring look upon red eyes.

Falling down on his knees, he vowed to her; eyes blurring with emotion and his heart beating fast and heavily inside his ribcage. "Princess."

"Seiya," she called out to him, gently putting a hand under his chin, making him look up at her. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm-I'm looking for you."

"You're not supposed to be here."

He frowned at that, confused. "What do you mean? Where _is_ here?"

"A vortex," she answered, smiling mysteriously. "A mid-point between worlds. A fragment of your own mind and self," she continued. "Different cultures call it different names," kneeling in front of him, she took his hands in hers, smiling softly. "You have been here for way too long, Seiya. You need to go back."

"Go back to what?" he asked, suddenly finding himself fighting his own tears. "A life without you? I don't want to, I…"

"Yes, you do," she said, putting a finger to his lips and interrupting him. "Don't you remember?"

He blinked, surprised, confused and lost. "Remember what?"

And as he heard his own voice asking the question, something else flashed in front of his eyes.

A woman, laughing.

He could only see her face, yet he knew she was laying on the floor, as if he had just tackled her down. Her short blonde hair slightly messed, her green eyes shining brightly in unconcealed, open mirth. And the smile on her face… That smile, wide, bright, honest, made his heart jump in resonating happiness.

And then the image changed, and he saw her dancing in the middle of a night club. Hands up in lose fits over her shaking head, a black, off the shoulder swing tank doing nothing to hide her figure as she moved. Round, perfect hips moving and swinging, covered by a dark blue jean that seemed to be painted over endless legs. Green orbs opening up just in time to look at him, and then gift him with the softest, most loving smile before she turned around, teasingly and playfully winking at him.

And then it changed again. And this time, he saw her laying on a bed. With her back to him, bare and exposed, perfectly white, incredibly soft looking skin making his fingertips ache, and dark sheets tangled around her legs and hips. She turned her face around, moving to lay on her stomach; a small, tired smile coming to her lips, as sleep had yet to abandon green eyes.

He knew her.

He knew he knew who she was. And he knew he belonged on that bed, with her, just like he knew he would give anything to see her smiling like that again. Sleepy and softly, looking so incredibly cute and beautiful. He just couldn't place a name to the smiling, beautiful face.

What was wrong with him? Why couldn't he remember?

"You have to go back, Seiya," his Princess' voice reached him, and he found himself kneeling right in front of her once more. "Go back to her. To the life you've built for yourself, with her."

"But…"

"You know you want to," Kakyuu said, smiling gently and knowingly.

He frowned, confused. Why couldn't he remember anything? All he knew was that, here, he was with his Princess, and if he left this place, he would never see her again. He didn't even know how he knew it, he just did.

And he didn't want to let go. He didn't want to leave.

"You have a life out there," his Princess said, softly and gently. "A career, friends that love you. A family."

"You are my family."

The smile on her face turned somewhat sad, yet never losing its softness and gentleness. "Not anymore."

"What? No, Princess..."

A light somewhere in the distance suddenly appeared out of nowhere, making him blink in surprise. But what left him speechless was the little silhouette in it.

The light was blinding, and he couldn't really see much. He could barely distinguish a mop of black hair and a pair of small, thin legs, as the kid just stood there, waving a hand up in the air, happily and excitedly.

There was something familiar about that kid. An aura he had felt before. But where? When?

"Daddy!" the kid exclaimed, in a clear, loud, high pitch yet melodic voice, so filled with excitement. The way the kid just called him making a knot form in his throat.

_What?_, he thought to himself, confused out if his mind.

"Daddy, come on!" the kid exclaimed again, waving out a hand for him to follow. "Over here!"

"You have so much to live for, Seiya," Kakyuu said, softly, getting his attention again and making him turn back to her, "and I'm so proud of you."

"Kakyuu..."

"I'm always with you. Remember that."

Confused, and suddenly torn between staying here and being with his Princess, and going after that little kid and find out who it was, to follow that pull that, strangely enough, was calling out to him, he blinked, grabbing his head with both hands. But before he could make up his mind, everything started spinning around, making his vision blurry and his head hurt.

He shut his eyes closed, a rumbling groan escaping him as he prayed for whatever that was happening to be over soon. And when it finally did and he opened his eyes again, he had to blink several times, eyes traveling all around and taking in his surroundings, before he finally realized he was at the guest room one blonde tall woman had showed him the night before.

Sitting up on the bed, making the sheets and covers to a side, he rested his pounding head on his hands, taking deep breaths to try to steady his spinning thoughts.

He had dreamed of her again.

As usual, he couldn't remember what was said, if it was a memory or just a dream. But he knew he saw her there, in his dream. But unlike any other dream he had have since he woke up with a big black hole where memories from the past years should be, this time he could clearly recall looking into her caring red eyes

And once more, he had the feeling there had been someone else visiting his dreams as well. But he couldn't remember who or why. It was as if that knowledge evaded him, right at hand reach, yet he couldn't grasp it.

Groaning, he kicked the sheets away, getting off the bed, more than ready to just push thoughts about his dreams and his fragmented mind to a side for now, and concentrate on putting something on his empty stomach instead. Taking his sleeping pants off, he got dressed with the same clothes he had worn the day before, putting on his pants and the plaid blue shirt.

The idea of taking a shower was inviting. But he really didn't want to trouble the tall blonde any more than necessary, so he dismissed the idea, deciding to take a shower once he was back at the apartment.

Rearranging the bed and making sure everything was in order, he stepped into the hallway, wondering if there would be anything of his liking in the kitchen. He remembered Haruka saying there was enough food, but he wondered what that included, exactly. It felt kind of weird, walking around the house on his own, but he didn't have the heart to wake her up, and he figured allowing her the luxury of sleeping in for as long as she wanted couldn't hurt.

That was, until he heard it.

It was faint, mainly because of the closed door at the end of the hallway, but still strong enough for him to hear it, letting him know she was probably already up. Frowning lightly and curiously when that chocking sound came again, and making up his mind, he walked the distance, opening the door and taking a peek inside.

The bed was unmade and empty; blue covers and white sheets pouring down to the floor. The morning light entering through the unclosed curtains, bathing the room and giving it a rather nice, warm touch, even with the bed unmade like that. The final result giving a sense of home, of life, that it was hard to describe.

But all thoughts left him when that sound came again, loud and clear enough for him to guess what it was. A rather colorful curse followed, and he chuckled, shaking his head, as he followed the source of the sound, going straight into the bathroom.

And there, wearing nothing but a black silk shirt with sleeves and collar lined in deep blue, butt on the floor, hands buried in short blonde locks and forehead resting against the toilet seat, one Haruka Tenoh seemed to be quite busy cursing under her breath while trying to keep her stomach inside her own body.

"Good morning," he said, making his presence known.

Green eyes looked up at him for a moment, before a groan reach his ears, and the blonde went back to rest her forehead against the toilet. "Does it look like a good morning to you?" she grunted.

Deciding to let the rather unfriendly comment slide, knowing this was probably the completely wrong time to argue with her, he shook his head, chuckling lightly, as he went to the sink, filling up a glass with water.

She took it, not without letting out another groan and taking a long sip.

"Morning sickness?" he guessed.

That made her look up at him again. One judgmental eyebrow going up. "I don't really like you right now," she simply stated.

Again, he chuckled, wondering if she was always this grumpy in the mornings, but deciding that, either way, her throwing up her stomach definitively had something to do with the sour mood. "That's the hormones talking."

Green eyes narrowed at him then, as that well known deep growl reached his ears. "Scratch that. I hate you," she corrected herself. "This is all your fault."

"Hey, I know I don't remember much," he said, raising up one long finger as to make a point, looking at her straight in the eyes, "but I do know it takes two to tango."

She blinked at the words, as an outrageous frown came to her features. "Oh, so now it's _my_ fault?" she asked, accusingly. "Is that what you're saying?"

"No. Come on, that's not..."

"Gee, sorry for forcing your dick inside me!"

He closed his eyes, blushing at such -quite graphic- words as he tried to forced his mind not to picture anything. Shaking his head, he knelt down next to her, helping her to stand up.

"That's not what I meant," he tried to say, but she was too caught up in her outburst.

"Because that's totally what happened! You showed up at my hotel room and I just jumped right at you, being the inconsiderate, rude, mean, horny person that I am," she said, rambling on, now in a mocking tone, as she pointed at herself while frowning at him. "That was my plan from the very beginning. Very Machiavellian of me, really, taking advantage of you and raping you like that, thinking 'hey, he's actually enjoying this', while you were just too busy getting me pregnant!" she finished, pushing him on the chest with both hands.

He took her hands in his, both to calm her down and to stop her from hitting him any further, unable to really fight down a chuckle. Funny how she had just managed to still point an accusing finger his way at the end of that little speech of hers. But knowing that pointing that out to her right now was definitively not the best way to go, he let it slide, along with the accusation of him enjoying her 'raping him'.

That last part was making it hard for him to keep himself from picturing anything in his mind. Specially considering the woman in question was standing so close to him, wearing nothing but a sleeping shirt that did absolutely nothing to hide slender, smooth looking, seemingly never ending legs, and a pair of round, full breasts he could easily guess from under said shirt...

"I can't do this," the lost, hopeless tone in her voice brought him back to reality and off the road his mind was involuntary taking, and making him look into her suddenly lost, confused, scared green eyes. "I can't... I..." she trailed off, stepping away from him and running her hands through her short blonde hair. "I don't even recognize myself!"

He smiled at that, nodding his head. "It's ok, it's normal to..."

"Is it? Really?" she asked, in a questioning tone that somehow managed to also sound kind of panicky. "Because I feel like a cheap, pathetic little character out of some cheesy soup opera or something!" she exclaimed, raising both hands up in the air. "And I'm tired all the time, and my breasts hurt like hell," she cupped her own breasts as she said this, frowning and letting out a small groan, "and I keep whining all the time... and I _never_ whine!" she then exclaimed, getting suddenly defensive.

"Well, you're more... sensitive..." he tried to reason.

"Oh my God, I'm gonna get so fat," she said, as if the thought never crossed her mind before that moment.

He chuckled, shaking his head. "You're pregnant, Haruka. It's normal to gain some weight."

"I'm not talking about a few pounds, here," she corrected him, frowning offended. "I mean really, _really_ fat. What with people shoving food down my throat all the time, and eating burgers?" she said, mockingly. "That can't be healthy! I've already gained more than just a few pounds and it's been what? Two months? I can't do this for another seven!"

"You've gained a few pounds?" he repeated, arching a questioning eyebrow while eying her up and down.

Green eyes narrowed dangerously at him then. "It's showing."

"Really?" he asked, unable to hide the mockery tone as once again, he looked her up and down.

She was thin and tall and slender. It wasn't hard at all to guess there was not one ounce of fat in her body, and she surely didn't look like a fat person at all. And he had seen her stomach just a few days ago, for crying out loud; slightly swollen, as if maybe she had eaten a bit too much, but still flat and most certainly not showing.

"I'm the one who has to struggle with the pants here, alright?" she retorted. "Jeans don't lie. Trust me, it's showing."

He shook his shoulders, deciding it was best not to argue with her on that one. "If you say so."

"I can't do this," she said again, frowning worriedly now. "I've never been fat. I don't even know how to _be_ fat!" she exclaimed. "I've always been slim and athletic and healthy, and now my ass is getting huge on me! And I have a _great_ ass!" she exclaimed, getting defensive again, and he couldn't help but secretly agree with her. "I can't lose it!" she added, panicking, in a whining tone and pouting.

And Seiya was sure he thought he would never live long enough to see the strong, proud Senshi of the Winds _pouting_...

"Alright!" he exclaimed, placing both his hands on her shoulders, both to stop her from pacing around, and to shut her up already. "You're freaking out."

"Damn right I am!" she agreed, nodding her head vigorously.

Remembering this was probably the hormones talking, messing with her emotions, he kept his hold on her shoulders, shaking her lightly.

"Listen to me," he said, strongly, kicking precaution off the window. He had promised to take things slow and not say or do anything that would potentially embarrass them both, but she obviously needed to hear this. "Remember last night, when I said you're hot?" he asked, risking a small, sided smile when she seemed to finally come down from her overly emotional outburst, cheeks blushing lightly and nodding her head, though still pouting a little. "I didn't mean eight or four years ago, or even five months ago, because, well, I don't remember that. I meant, now. Right now," he said, marking every word, checking her out once more just to make his point.

And maybe because he wanted to. And, well, that sleeping shirt did help to make his point quite clear.

He smiled at how adorably cute she looked right now, with her green eyes wide opened, unsure, kind of scared and suddenly shy, and that cute, embarrassed blush upon her cheeks.

"You're a hot, beautiful woman, who just happens to be pregnant," he continued, knowing he didn't even need to try to make it sound like he meant his own words, but still trying to keep himself as objective as possible. "Morning sickness is normal. Being a little more sensitive and emotional is normal. And, yes, gaining weight is also normal."

She shook a shoulder, fidgeting with the collar of her shirt. "When did you become such an expert?" she asked, in an accusing tone that he knew, was more to argue her way out of her sudden embarrassment at her emotional breakdown than anything else.

"Google," he answered, in all honesty.

She chuckled at his answer, lightly punching him on the chest.

It was a small gesture, really, both playful and endearing. Something he somehow knew she did often. And it all of a sudden made him realize how close they were, standing right in front of each other, with his hands somehow having found the way down her arms, coming dangerously close to fully take a life of their own and encircle themselves around her waist.

He took a step back, freeing her from the half embrace and awkwardly scratching the back of his head. And she seemed to realize this, because she simply stood there, crossing her arms over her chest and clearing her throat.

"There's some really useful information in there," he said, more as an attempt to break the suddenly weird atmosphere than anything.

"Such as?" she asked, arching a questioning eyebrow. "How to survive a pregnant, hormonal, crazy woman without her punching the life out of you?" she asked, in a half serious, half teasing tone. "'Cause pregnant or not, I still can, you know?"

He chuckled, shaking his head and rubbing his eyes with one hand. He knew her well enough to take her word on that.

"I think I'm gonna google that," she continued, frowning half curious, obviously amused now. "Just to see if my picture shows up."

"You need to eat," he said, not even bothering on answering her comment, and taking the conversation back on track. "No more skipping meals."

"I didn't skip any meal," she defended herself.

"You didn't eat dinner last night."

"Oh, I did," she argued. "That?" she then said, pointing at the toilet. "That was the baby saying no more chicken pie after midnight."

He chuckled again at that, amused. "Look, you can make it as healthy as you want, which is better anyway, but you have to eat," he said, serious now. "You said it yourself, you're a healthy person already. And knowing you, you'll get your normal weight and figure in record time. So stop worrying, you're not losing your ass," he teased, smiling when her only answer to that was a bright blush coming to her cheeks. "You're just earning a few pounds so that both you and the baby are strong and healthy, alright?"

She took a deep breath, nodding her head. And she was just about to say something, when the doorbell and Kalina's happy bark got their attention, and he frowned, curious.

"Are you expecting someone?"

A mix between a groan and a whine escaped the blonde, as her shoulders sunk and she rolled her eyes. "The cavalry."


	27. Chapter 26

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, fav it, leave a review, bookmark it. But please, do not steal it!

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><p><strong>26<strong>

While Seiya went to get the door, she made fast work of getting dress. She had a pretty good idea of who it might be, and she really didn't want any kind of awkward questions or potentially embarrassing assumptions coming her way. It was bad enough already with her nervous breakdown just now. She really didn't need any more embarrassing moments…

She put on some comfy trousers and threw a sweater on, fishing for her slippers so her feet wouldn't get cold and then walking out of her own bedroom. And as she approached the stairway, the sounds of Kalina's happy barks and the voices coming from downstairs confirmed her earlier suspicions, as Makoto's cheerful, curious voice reached her ears.

"So nice to find you here!" the brunette said, obviously talking to Seiya.

_Subtle_, she thought to herself, inwardly nodding her approval. Maybe she was being a little too paranoid, after all.

"Did you sleep here?" came Minako's voice, proving her previous thought wrong. "We're not interrupting anything, are we?"

_Not so subtle_, she corrected herself, rolling her eyes and shaking her head as she reached the bottom of the stairs just in time to see Minako's big baby blue eyes wide and opened, curiously checking one black haired singer up and down. Deciding it was for everyone's best interest -everyone being mainly Seiya and her- not to let Minako go on with her questioning, she cleared her throat, making her presence known and smiling to her newly arrived friends.

"Haruka, you're up!" Rei exclaimed, blinking in surprise.

"I'm fine, Pyro," she assured her, as she went to the sliding doors of the backyard, opening one up so Kalina could go out for a little while. "I thought Odango and Ami were coming as well?" she asked, only half curious, and actually grateful for the cavalry having been reduced in its usual number. In truth, she was just trying to change the course of the conversation.

"Ami's stuck at the hospital for a few more hours," the Miko informed. "But she said she'll call later. And you know how hard it can be to force Usagi out of bed before midday…"

"But all is good!" Minako exclaimed, giving the racer her famous million dollar smile. "Nurse Minako is here!"

She chuckled, scratching the back of her neck and wondering how to get out of the current invasion unharmed.

From the corner of her eyes she saw Seiya chuckling lightly too, probably remembering the conversation they have had the night before. And she was barely able to contain herself and point that out to him, though she still arched an eyebrow, unable to hide the look on her face that clearly said 'see what I mean?'. A look Seiya was perfectly able to interpret, judging by that second, amused chuckle that escaped the singer.

"So!" Makoto exclaimed, shoving the nurse wannabe aside with her hip. "I have the groceries!" she announced the obvious, as she raised the bags she was carrying, walking into the kitchen. "What is future mommy craving for breakfast on this lovely morning?" she asked, in an overly sweet, overly dramatic english accent.

She frowned at the mere mention of food, but followed the cavalry plus one black haired singer into the kitchen all the same. Knowing better than to argue, and before anyone had the chance to once again give her the -by now- well known and boring lecture, she took a seat on one of the chairs around the kitchen's table, looking up at the tall brunette as she took the groceries out of the bags.

"Wow," Seiya mumbled. "You sure brought a lot of food…"

"Oh, yeah," Makoto said, now giggling somewhat embarrassedly, as she played with her long, wavy ponytail. "I wasn't sure of what Haruka would want, so… I tried to cover as much as possible."

"Mako, really…"

"Would you want me to make something for you too?" the brunette asked the singer, completely and royally ignoring the blonde racer, smiling widely and brightly instead. "Anything you want! I can make you pancakes or a strawberry cake… or are you more in the dear old chocolate kinda mood?" she asked, enthusiastically. "Cheesecake, maybe?"

Her stomach jumped and twisted at the menu, and she frowned. But before she could say anything to the Amazon, the blonde sitting next to her beat her to it.

"You didn't make _me_ anything when _I_ was in bed last month," Minako protested, narrowing her baby blue eyes towards the tall brunette.

"She's eating for two and he just woke up from a coma," Makoto said, pointing at the racer and the singer. "You had a minor tonsillitis," Makoto pointed out, rolling her eyes.

"I was in pain!" Minako argued, pouting.

"You just want a cake all to yourself," Rei pointed out to her, crossing her arms over her chest and rolling her eyes at the pouting blonde. "Those go straight to your ass, you know?" she then added, teasingly arching a disapproving, questioning eyebrow at the offended blonde.

"I have a _great_ ass!" the blonde said, proudly shoving her nose up in the air. "I can afford a cake or two."

"Guys, please," she finally said, massaging her temples and groaning. "Can we _not_ talk about food right now?"

"Morning sickness?" Makoto asked, frowning now.

"I seriously don't know why they call it that if it hits you at any given moment," she complained, resting her back against the chair and letting out a sigh.

"Oh! In that case!" the brunette exclaimed, taking several small herb bags from the grocery bags. "These should help!"

She blinked, frowning at the little bags and then up at the brunette. "What is that?"

"I did a little research and found this list of herbs that are all good to relieve morning sickness and are totally natural," Makoto answered. "Raspberry leaf, alfalfa, which also helps preventing anemia, lemon balm, which is theoretically good to fight mood swings."

From the corner of her eye she saw Seiya's eyebrows going all the way up as the guy tried to hide his amused, mocking smile off his face, while Minako's big, baby blue eyes paid careful attention to Makoto's every word, and Rei just rolled her eyes, shaking her head.

"And postpartum depression," Makoto continued, smiling widely. "But we still have a long way to go before that..."

"When did _you_ become a midwife?" the Miko asked.

"At least she's _trying_ to help," Minako put in, defending the Amazon, "instead of just coming in here with a horrid frowning face and..."

"Excuse me?" Rei asked, frowning dangerously, offended.

"The last thing she needs right now is your negativity," the blonde said, frowning as well. "And the whole point of being here is to help her and..."

"Who made you the boss?" Rei asked, now obviously pissed.

"Ok, time out!" Haruka exclaimed, raising both hands up in the air.

Three pairs of eyes blinked up at her at her outburst. And as if on cue, Seiya's cellphone went off; the catchy, happy melody set up as a ringtone breaking the suddenly quiet air around, making the three pair of eyes switch to him instead, as he took his cell out of his back pocket and, checking the caller ID, excused himself, walking out of the kitchen.

She let out a sigh, massaging her temples. "I appreciate the gesture," she started to say. "I do. But this really isn't necessary."

"We're interrupting something here, aren't we?" Makoto asked in a hushed though highly curious voice, deliberately changing the subject.

A half frown made it to her features then, wishing Seiya to get off the phone and come back as soon as possible; she knew no awkward questions would arise with him in the room. But as it was right now, she was at the mercy of her -highly curious- friends.

"No."

"Did he spend the night here?" the blonde asked, as subtle as ever. "Did you guys…"

"Nothing happened, alright?" she was fast to say before Minako could finish that question. "He still doesn't remember anything, and he's still back to…"

"Don't say he's back to hating you," Rei interrupted, raising a warning finger and frowning down on her, before she pointed out at the direction one black haired singer had disappeared into. "Because that is _not_ him hating you."

She let out a sigh, sinking in her chair. "I don't know, ok?" she finally said. "_He_ doesn't know," she added. "He came around yesterday to talk, and then he spent the night over," she explained. "He slept in the guest room," she was fast to add the second three pairs of eyebrows went up in a curious, half questioning, all the way teasing manner. "Sure, we talked, and he's trying, but… I don't know," she said, letting her eyes wander around the kitchen. "Everything's just… awkward…"

"So we _are_ interrupting," Makoto said, nodding her head and smiling softly but knowingly.

And again, Haruka just sighed.

Were they really interrupting anything? Maybe some more awkward -and potentially embarrassing on her part- conversations. And after that little episode on the bathroom just now, she wasn't sure she was ready for yet another one; she really didn't want to make a fool out of herself. The whole idea of Seiya being there was for him to get to know her better. What would the guy think if she kept on letting her crazy hormones take over?

But then again, she knew there were things to be said, to be explained. Surely, there were many questions jumping in Seiya's mind. And though she had absolutely no idea of what he would ask, exactly, she knew he deserved some answers. She didn't know teenage Seiya's mind that much, but she just hoped the Seiya she knew and loved would still be somewhere in there, and he wouldn't just go ahead and ask all kinds of private, intimate questions…

At least not bluntly. Just because they used to have a perfectly healthy, very active sexual life, highly satisfying and simply mind blowing, didn't mean she was anywhere near ready or willing to tell that to the guy...

She blushed at her own thoughts, and the cavalry took her reddening cheeks as a confirmation to Makoto's words.

"Alright, then," Minako said, smiling and nodding her head. "We'll leave you two lovebirds to your chatting and catching up."

"Guys, really, it's not like that…" she tried, in vain, to explain.

"I'll call Usagi and tell her you're in good hands," Rei put in, winking. "But Ami would probably still come by later to check on you."

"Ok, seriously?" the tall blonde said, now getting a little bit annoyed at their ridiculous, twenty four seven overprotective tendencies. "That's really not necessary. I'm _fine_."

"So you keep saying," came Seiya's voice as the singer walked into the kitchen again. "But doctor said you need to rest."

"Right!" Minako said, as a scolding frown came to her features and she pointed a commanding finger her way. "So you're gonna do exactly that, go it?"

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed, raising both hands in the air. "I'm not a baby!"

"Haruka, honey," Makoto said, taking Haruka's hand in hers and patting it gently while looking into her green eyes with a serious look upon her face. "We know you're strong and independent, and you're our all time favorite daredevil, and we all love you. But right now, you need to lay back and let us take care of you for a change, kay?"

"Fine!" she exclaimed, finally giving up. They were going to do whatever they wanted to do, anyway, so why bother? "Whatever," she mumbled, crossing her arms over her chest and sinking in her seat again.

"Ok, then!" Minako exclaimed, clapping her hands and standing up from the chair. "We'll leave now."

"Already?" was, to Haruka's utter surprise and annoyance, Seiya's question.

"Well, yeah," the blonde said, as she tapped his chest playfully. "We know she's in good hands."

The singer had the decency to blush then, and her annoyance went flying off the window. She shrunk her shoulders as she looked up to him, feeling sorry for the guy; here he was, having just found out he was having a baby with the woman he didn't remember ever being with, only to get teased about a romance that wasn't really there right now.

"I'm sure he has things to do," she put in, if only to release him from the task of babysitting.

"Not really," he said, shaking a shoulder. "Not until the afternoon, at least…"

"Oh, that's fine," Rei said, waving a hand around. "Ami would be here by then, so no problem."

"Then it's settled," Makoto said, nodding her head. "Just make sure to try out those teas, ok?" she then added, pointing at the forgotten herbal bags. "It's all natural, so they won't hurt the baby. And who knows? Maybe they do help!"

She just nodded her head, not even bothering on making a comment. She was just glad the cavalry was getting off her back for a little while.

"I don't think there's a need to say this, but just in case," Minako said, as she put on a serious frown and crossed her arms over her chest glaring up at one black haired singer. "Taking care of our favorite racer and her cute little offspring…"

"You don't even know if it's cute yet," Rei interrupted, rolling her eyes. "Right now, it's nothing but a little two inches bud with a heartbeat," she pointed out. And then she shrunk her shoulders, looking down on the racer. "No offense."

She frowned, shaking her shoulders. Not exactly the nicest way to put it, but it wasn't wrong either…

"Fine!" Minako exclaimed, as it was now her turn to roll her baby blue eyes. "Little Jr., is that better?" she asked, mockingly, before turning back to look at Seiya. "Like I was saying before I was so _rudely_ interrupted with such an insensitive comment," she continued, eying the Miko girl for a moment as she said so, "taking care of Haruka and little Jr. here is of great importance. So be nice!"

.-.

He blinked at the finger dangerously and accusingly pointing practically at his nose, not really knowing what to say to that. Because really, what was he suppose to say to that? That he didn't mean to hurt her? It wasn't really his fault that he didn't remember a thing, and there wasn't much he could do about it either…

So he did the only thing he could think of. He nodded, blushing lightly as he did so.

But Minako, or either of them, really, didn't mind him much as they all went to hug and kiss the tall, slightly annoyed blonde. And after all the goodbyes were said, he walked them to the door. It made him feel out of place, doing that, even if technically it was his house. But he was not about to let Haruka start walking as she pleased. Which was why, when he walked back into the kitchen and saw her up and cleaning the table, putting the groceries Makoto had brought away, he frowned. Crossing his arms over his chest, he cleared his throat, making her turn her face around as she put things away on a cabinet.

"What?"

"What are you doing?"

"Isn't it obvious?" she asked, playing fool.

"Sit down," he ordered, pointing at the chair she had been occupying just now.

She turned fully around then, rolling her eyes. "For the last time," she started, obviously annoyed, "I'm pregnant, not dying."

"You're not supposed to be up," he reminded her. "And, didn't you hear what they just said?" he then added, pointing at the general direction of the entry door. "If you break a fingernail, I'm a dead man."

She chuckled at his joke, shrinking her shoulders. "Sorry about that…"

He chuckled too, shoving his hands into his pockets. "It's ok, it's not like it's your fault," he said, before pointing at the chair with his head. "But please, just… sit down already."

"It's not like I'm running a marathon or anything," she said, refusing to sit down as she continued with her task. "I'm only putting things away, ok?"

"And making breakfast," he added for her, noticing the coffee machine was on when it hadn't been when he left the kitchen.

Turning back to him, she blinked, frowned, and then shook a shoulder, turning around again. "That's for you," she informed. "You're not gonna say no to coffee in the morning, are you?" she asked, slightly turning her head around just enough to arch a mocking eyebrow his way.

Damn, she really did know him well. He had been craving for the dark morning elixir ever since he woke up.

Some food to go along with that wouldn't hurt, either.

As if reading his mind, she instructed for him to take the bread out of a cabinet for her as she opened the fridge, taking the milk and what looked like peach butter out. She put the items on the table and then went back to the counter, putting the tea bags out but leaving one behind, probably deciding to give it a shot and drink it.

Deciding not to argue with her, he went to help her instead. Following her instructions as to where things were, he took a frying pan out to make French toasts, and then went for the cups, handing one for her so that she could prepare her tea while he poured the freshly made coffee in the other.

Without even realizing it, he fell into the routine. He moved around the kitchen, working with the woman next to him as they made breakfast. It was as if his body suddenly had a mind of its own; it felt if he was used to doing this, as if it was something he used to do every day. And it was only when the kettle whistled and Haruka poured the water on her tea cup when he realized this and he blinked, staring at the toasts he had just put on a plate.

"Don't over think it," the husky voice suddenly broke into his mind, making him blink again before turning to look at the blonde standing next to him.

The sided, half felt smile she gave to him made his stomach shrink, and he blinked again, opening and closing his mouth, but not saying anything at all.

"It's only breakfast," she said, taking her cup and walking to the table. "It's not like we're doing anything."

That last remark made him blush, and he shook his head, taking his coffee cup and walking up to the table himself. Sitting down right across from her, he took a sip from his coffee, eying her all the while.

"It's weird," he finally said, making green eyes look up at him. "You, knowing me this well," he provided. "I know, been together for almost four years, yeah," he was fast to say when she opened her mouth, guessing that was exactly what she was going to say. "But still… it's weird. Specially considering I don't really know you."

"What would you like to know?" she asked, taking a sip from her tea.

"I don't know… something," he said, shaking his shoulders and wandering his eyes around for a moment. "Something people don't usually know about you."

"Something _you_ would know," she finished for him.

He nodded and she let out a sigh. Taking a toast and putting some peach butter into it, she hummed softly, as if considering her answer for a moment.

"Alright, let's see," she started, taking a bite from her toast and frowning lightly. "I can deal with a lot of things," she said, after swallowing, "but if there's a cockroach, I'm out," she said, waving her hand towards the door for emphasis. "Spiders, worms, any kind of ugly, small insect, I'm fine with," she continued. "But cockroaches just…" she shivered, shaking her head. "I don't know, they gross me out."

"That's it? That's your big secret?"

"When asked," she continued, arching one perfectly lined eyebrow his way to shut him up, "I say my favorite movie is Gone with the wind. Which really is a great movie and I do like it, but my real favorite one ever since I can remember is actually ET"

Two black eyebrows went up then, and he couldn't help the half questioning, half mocking look that came to his face as a chuckle escaped him. "That's… kind of ironic…" he commented, still chuckling. "Coming from _you_…"

"It's embarrassing," she corrected him. "That's why no one knows that. But I can't help it," she defended herself. "If it's on, I'm on the couch, watching it. And every time he gets caught by the mean NASA guys I just… it breaks my heart," she said, chuckling despite herself when he just laughed. "Yeah, laugh all you want."

"I'm sorry… I just…"

"It's ok," she said, shaking her shoulders. "You laughed the first time around, too," she said, chuckling again. "Anyway! My favorite song is 'I love rock n' roll'," she continued. "By Joan, of course."

"Of course," he agreed, nodding his head.

"That song puts me in a good mood, every time," she said, before taking a deep breath and tilting her head to a side, adverting her eyes away from his. "And on more private matters, I've only been with four people in my life," she confessed. "You being number four, and all previous ones being female."

Again, two black eyebrows went up, this time curiously. Not particularly surprised at the last bit of information concerning the gender of her past partners, he was both surprised and curious at the other part that involved that little information slash confession of hers.

"So, there," she finished, waving a hand around as a light blush appeared on her cheeks. "All things about me only few people know of."

It felt weird, in a good kind of way. To know he had been her first. He remembered her saying something about not being about the gender, but still. It felt good to know that, for whatever reason, she had chosen him, both over any other women, and over any other men out there.

He just wished he could remember it. Or their first kiss, for that matter.

"I'm sure you wrote all about it on those journalish files you keep in your laptop," she then said, shaking her shoulder and dismissing the entire subject.

He frowned at that. "My laptop?"

"Yeah," she said, nodding her head. "Usagi gave it back to you, right?"

"Yeah, but…" he trailed off, confused for a moment, until he remembered the protected files he had been unable to see. "You know the password?"

"Wen en' i' sul," she offered in his native language, with such a perfect pronunciation that surprised him more than the blush that came to her cheeks as she shook her shoulder. "You called me that… sometimes…"

"Oh," he mumbled, not really knowing what to say to that. No wonder he hadn't been able to figure out the password…

"Anyway, that's the password," the blonde said, taking her tea cup again as she tried to fight off her blush. "All in one word, no apostrophes," she instructed.

He nodded his head, numbly, before another thought crossed his mind.

"You... you read it?" he asked, not sure if he was offended at the idea, or just confusedly embarrassed.

Though he had never been the writer kind, keeping a personal journal and writing down thoughts and feelings was something he had done in the past, so it didn't surprise him to know he still had that little habit. But, of course, he had absolutely no idea of what he could have possible written in there about events he had no recollection of whatsoever, about his life with a woman he was only now starting to really see.

She frowned then, making her nose wrinkle cutely. "Just because I was able to figure out the password, doesn't mean I went ahead and invaded your privacy like that," she said, shaking her shoulder. "I only read the first few lines," she then admitted. "I stopped when I realized what those files were."

"I see..."

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "I was trying to clean your laptop. If I knew what it was, I wouldn't have even looked at it," she said, smiling awkwardly now.

"It's ok," he assured her, smiling. "I have no idea of what's in there," he admitted, chuckling, "but, you know... it's ok."

She returned the smile then, looking at him and studying him for a moment, tilting her head to a side. "It's weird, you know?" she commented, after a moment of silence. "Seeing myself through your eyes like that."

"I'm sorry," he said, not knowing what to say, and not really sure of what was he apologizing for. But it only made him even more curious as to what was on those files, exactly.

"No, it's fine," she said, shaking her head. "It's kind of the same with your songs. It's flattering," she said, as once again the blush came rushing to her cheeks. "Weird, but flattering."

"Well, in that case, then I'm not sorry," he said, chuckling embarrassedly as he rubbed the back of his neck.

They laughed together, more out of awkwardness than anything.

Green eyes drifted away again in that shyness of hers he was starting to slowly get used to, and he kept his gaze on her, studying her. There were so many things, so many stories and facts he didn't know. So many sides of her he didn't know of.

And as they continued to eat their breakfast, one thought came to mind. He couldn't wait to read that journal. And then maybe, just maybe, he could start to make some sense out of everything.

.

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><p><strong>A.N.:<strong> Wow! This turned out to be much longer than I thought…

_Wen en' i' sul_ is what Seiya called her in Fiery Tales. In case you forgot, it means _Maiden of the Wind_.

**Sometime in the future, in Remember me?: **"There he is! The man of the hour!"

Aaaand:

"And whatever you do, when the baby's coming, don't look down there. That would ruin it for you..."


	28. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. Please, do not steal it!

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><p>This is the first day of my life.<br>I swear I was born right in the doorway.  
>I went out in the rain suddenly everything changed,<br>they're spreading blankets on the beach.

Yours is the first face that I saw.  
>I think I was blind before I met you.<br>Now I don't know where I am,  
>I don't know where I've been,<br>but I know where I want to go.

And so I thought I'd let you know  
>that these things take forever.<br>I especially am slow.  
>But I realize that I need you<br>and I wondered if I could come home.

Remember the time you drove all night  
>just to meet me in the morning.<br>And I thought it was strange you said everything changed,  
>you felt as if you'd just woke up.<br>And you said "this is the first day of my life.  
>I'm glad I didn't die before I met you.<br>But now I don't care I could go anywhere with you,  
>and I'd probably be happy"<p>

So if you want to be with me,  
>with these things there's no telling,<br>we just have to wait and see.  
>But I'd rather be working for a paycheck<br>than waiting to win the lottery.  
>Besides maybe this time is different.<br>I mean I really think you like me.

**(First day of my life - Bright eyes)**

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><p><strong>27<strong>

There was a thoughtful frown decorating his features as he walked out of the store. With the package safely placed on the inside pocket of his coat, he walked to his car, wondering what to do next.

Even after reading bits and pieces of the journal he used to keep on his laptop, he was still as confused as ever.

Sure, it had helped finding out a thing or two. Like the store he had just walked out of, and the package he now carried and didn't remember ordering. Or how that first night at that club had been, with one tall racer wearing a sexy little number and a pink wig, sensually dancing and teasing the hell out of him while mocking him with her words.

Maybe it was because of reading those files he kept on his laptop, or maybe it was his imagination running wild on him. But for whatever reason, the flashing images and dreams about her were getting worse. The dreams last longer now, but only a little bit. But even those were enough for him to wake up with his blood rushing through his veins, burning, with the now clear image of a tall, slender woman dancing sensually, and dancing for him in his mind.

He would see her wearing a completely black, satin bra with matching skirted thong, over the knee black stockings and fingerless gloves. With red covering her smiling lips and long blonde hair cascading down her shoulders, he would see her standing right in front of him, challenging him. And then she would be wearing skin tone bra and panties with golden patterns over it, her hair short and blonde, though combed in curls, lifting one long leg up and holding her heeled feet against his chest as she said something about playing some sort of game.

The images and dreams never lasted long enough for him to know what was happening in them, and there was no way for him to know if those were actual memories or not. He hadn't really found the courage to read what he wrote about those encounters yet. And when in one of those flashes of his he saw her laying on the floor, jet black short bob wig covering her naturally blonde hair and wearing a completely black, embroidered wireless bra and matching panties, a black leather jacket that looked suspiciously familiar, green eyes blurred and lips parted, deep, husky moans coming out of her mouth as she touched herself...

He growled, starting the car as he shook his head, trying to clear his mind.

If by only reading about that first night, his imagination was getting this out of control, he didn't even want to think what would happen if he dared reading the entire thing. And he was still too embarrassed and too mortified to let himself go down that road; he was still trying to wrap his mind around the idea of being attracted to the racer. Imagining the more intimate moments with her, or even worse, reading whatever he had written about it, was just something he was not quite ready for yet.

But there were other, less dangerous things about the past few years he had learnt about. Day trips, vacations, shows that had, for one reason or another, been particularly good and he had decided to write them down. He learned about his manager getting married for the third time two years ago, and Yaten's last photography show, and how they all went out that night to celebrate after the press had all but praised the shorter man. He learned about Michiru talking him into participating in the show he was currently rehearsing for, saying how it was all to raise money for the Children's Hospital. Or about the still ongoing Play Station competition with both Hotaru and Haruka, and Setsuna's habit of preparing him a lunch box with her -apparently, famous and delicious- homemade oden whenever he was just about to get on the road for a tour.

And though he liked learning about all these little things that gave him an idea of what his life was like, it was the entries that talked about one tall blonde woman the ones he craved for the most. Masterly and stubbornly avoiding reading anything that would endanger his already fragile state of mind, he found this digital journal of his was a good way to find out things about her.

Like how, although she was good at it, she wasn't particularly fond of cooking and how she would take up any opportunity not to do it herself. Or how she would put on the radio whenever she was in a really good mood for whatever reason, and what a show she would make, singing -apparently, quite good- and dancing to it in nothing but her sleeping shirt and panties. He learned about her drooling obsession with Johnny Depp, her general dislike to terror movies and how she considered she had seen enough monsters and ugly beasts in real life, and how her first crush had been her first grade teacher. He learned about her close relationship with her father, and how she often complained about how her teammates used to treat her as another one of the guys, but ever since she first started dating him, they had miraculously and suddenly realized she was, in fact, a woman, and had stopped talking to her about certain matters. He also learned she didn't particularly mind not finding out the details of their conquests and love lives, but it annoyed her how they were now 'aware of her sensitivity', as they would put it.

The woman he read about on his journal was all over the place. She was a car racer, a magnificent pianist, a closeted singer whose favorite stage was the kitchen, a dedicated parent to Hotaru, a loving daughter, a loyal to death friend to Michiru and Setsuna, and a sister figure to the Inners' gang. Sports lover, she had a curious soft spot for the Barcelona soccer team and a definitively not so surprising love for extreme sports.

It was interesting, to say the least, finding out all these little things about the tall racer. It didn't exactly help figuring out how he felt, but it did help him form a more accurate idea of who she was.

He had visited her again a couple of times during the week, whenever rehearsal wouldn't finish too late and he thought there was a reasonable amount of time to spend talking with her before calling a night. And because he now knew these things about her, because he now knew she was a woman of wide tastes, with a rather wild nature and an opened mind, he felt more relax around her.

Whenever he went there, they would sit down on the couch enjoying a warm cup of tea -he wasn't particularly fond of it, but he found the scent of coffee made her sick, so he had switched to drinking tea when with her-, and just talk. And he found it was easy to talk to her. They would discuss about music, movies, books, history, or even philosophy. He found she had very strong opinions about certain things, but she was always open to learn new things.

They talked about anything, and during those conversations, he found he could make her laugh. And he also found he liked the sound of it. Deep and rich, her green eyes would always shine up in mirth whenever she laughed. It was such a different image to the one he remembered of her, it surprised him to no ends.

Entering the underground parking lot, he stopped the car on his usual spot, killing the engine. He had no idea of where all these discoveries would take him, and he didn't want to push himself into any given direction and jump to conclusions. But wherever it may all lead, for now, he was enjoying the ride.

Locking the car, he decided against the elevators and walked up to the stairs, making the way up to the second floor. Easing the scarf and letting it hang lose around his neck he buried his hands on his jean pockets, humming to himself.

He was in a good mood, all things considered.

Today was the last day of rehearsal. Only a few more arrangements here and there, and everything would be set and ready. After today, he could lay back and just wait until the day of the show. He would still have to go and make sure everything was perfect with the sound check, but that wouldn't take as long as rehearsing.

He still couldn't remember ever feeling what his songs talked about, but the last few days had helped on that matter. Getting to know Haruka better had helped, if not to fully feel the lyrics, then to at least understand where they must have come from. The music business was a lot like acting in that sense; with a story presented right in front of him, he just had to understand where the words came from and play pretend. Imagining how the songs had came to be wasn't as hard now, and so the task of learning all the songs, all the cues, all the beats and words was easier, and he was now really starting to enjoy his job.

He reached his destination and opened the door, walking into the long, dark red carpeted floor. To the left, a door led to the switching panel, where the arrangements and editing were made. To the right, a glass panel presented a wide view of the record room, full with all kinds of instruments, chairs, and even an amazingly comfortable sofa -as he had tasted himself- for the in between breaks.

And standing right there, his manager seemed to be having a nice conversation with his second guitarists, as the middle age man smiled and gestured with his hands, clearly thrilled about something. And when he noticed him making his way up to them, the wide smile that broke into his manager's face only confirmed his impression.

"There he is!" his manager exclaimed, raising both his hands up in the air. "The man of the hour!"

He chuckled at his enthusiasm, frowning lightly as he came to stand next to them. "Um… hi," he said, not sure of what it was his manager seemed to be so excited about.

"Why didn't you tell me, boy?" the man asked, frowning in a completely faked, anger manner. "I got a call from Yamamoto, and he told me."

He blinked, forming a small 'O' with his mouth.

Yamamoto was Haruka's manager, as he had come to know. And considering he had been dating the racer for almost four years, the idea of his manager and hers being in touch didn't seem that strange. It was probably a good call, business wise; so they could handle the media if needed.

"I understand if you don't want the news to leak to the newspapers yet, but you should've told _me_!" his manager was saying. "This calls for a celebration!" he then exclaimed, as his wide smile came back to his features. "Our golden star is gonna be a father!"

"I believe congratulations are in order," his guitarist offered, patting his back in camaraderie. "Way to go, man."

"Thanks," he said, burying his hands into his pockets, unable to fight off the small, proud smile from coming to his lips.

Sure, things were still kind of weird with the racer, and he still wasn't sure of where they stood. But as strange as everything was with the mother of his baby, he found he had been growing fond of the idea of being a father. It was amazing, to think he had help creating a new life that was now slowly growing inside Haruka's womb.

"So when's the wedding?" his manager asked.

"What?" he asked right back, taken by surprise by the question.

"It's the only reasonable, honorable way to go now."

"As if he hadn't thought about it even before knocking her up," Katashi, his guitarist, put in. "Right, man? You, dog!" he teased, elbowing him. "Though I still wonder how did you manage to turn her around like that," he then added, with a thoughtful frown upon his features. "I mean, she's a wild thing!"

He scratched the back of his head at that, not knowing how to answer to that. Because, really, he honestly didn't know himself…

"She's good to our boy, so that's all that matters," his manager put in, tapping his shoulder in a rather fatherly manner. "But here's a little word of advice from someone who's been there," he then said, frowning now. "You may wanna enjoy it while it lasts."

The singer frowned at that, confused. "What do you mean?"

"The sex," his manager offered, as if it was the most obvious thing. "'Cause once the baby is born, you won't be getting any."

He blinked at that, doing the only half rational thing he could think of. He blushed, deeply.

This was turning into a very awkward conversation, fast.

"You know what's the one up side of all those hormones and all that sensitivity?" his manager was saying. "With so many hormones running through their bodies, pregnant women are really, really horny."

His blushed deepened at that comment, as he switched from one foot to the other uncomfortably. That was something he seriously didn't need to know, or think of…

"That's true," Katashi agreed. "Best sex I ever had with my lady was during those first few months when she was pregnant with Yasu. She was wild, man!" he exclaimed, raising both hands up in the air and to his head for good measure. "But then she gained weight, and I had to lie to her and tell her she looked beautiful whenever she asked instead of telling her she looked like a whale just in hopes I may get some..." he then trailed off, shaking his head in a regretful manner. "And you don't even wanna know what childbirth does to her. You know, down there?"

"Jesus!" Seiya exclaimed under his breath, massaging the brick of his nose with one hand and shutting his eyes closed.

Was it absolutely necessary for them to tell him all these? He was having a hard time trying not to imagine -or remember? He wasn't sure- one particular tall blonde woman in tiny, sexy lingerie. He surely didn't need to be hearing these, only for his mind to run wild on him, picturing things he didn't even want to think about. Like what laid under that sexy lingerie, or how she looked completely naked…

_Dear Lord_, he mumbled to himself, mortified at his own thoughts.

"What are you guys talking about?" came a female voice from behind them, making them all turn around to the woman that was now standing next to him, smiling and frowning curiously.

Black straight hair tied up in a messy bun at the top of her head, precariously held with a pencil, and her black eyes wide and curious, he had come to find he really liked this girl. With a temper as strong as her own hands when holding a drumstick, the girl was not only a great drummer, but also the proud owner of a great sense of humor. Her strong spanish accent added a certain air to her voice, and her jokes and comments surely made the long sessions pass by quicker.

"Haruka's pregnant," Katashi offered.

Black eyes went wide opened at that. "She is?" she asked, turning to him and smiling widely. "That's so amazing! Congratulations!" she exclaimed, hugging him.

"Thanks, Mora," he said, hugging her back and smiling, thankful of her arrival and the change of course of the current conversation.

"And kiss her hot ass bye bye, too," Katashi commented, fast to get back on topic, "'cause that's not coming back."

Before he even had the chance to react to that statement, Mora did it for him. With one fast move, she smacked the guitarist on the back of his head.

"What? It's true!" the guy exclaimed in his defense, rubbing the now sore spot. "A woman's body changes after having a baby! That's a_ fact_!"

"Boobs go down to the floor, ass gets huge…" his manager put in, obviously agreeing with Katashi as he nodded his head, with regretful look upon his face. He shook his head, pointing a finger at the singer and putting on a serious frown. "And whatever you do, when the baby's coming, don't look down there," he advised. "That would ruin it for you."

He groaned, shutting his eyes closed again. Right now, he did not only want them to shut up already, but he also wanted for the earth to open up and swallow him alive…

"Oh my God!" Mora exclaimed, outraged. "You're supposed to be holding her hand, not staring at her vagina!"

"Why do you think I got divorced, huh?" his manager asked, shrinking his shoulders.

"You have two kids with two different women," Katashi noted, arching a teasing eyebrow.

"And wife number three is not having any children," the man stated firmly, nodding his head. "I met my quota on that area, and I like that pussy. I don't want to ruin it."

"Dear God…" Seiya mumbled, shaking his head.

"Joder! Eres una bestia, hombre!" Mora exclaimed in her mother tongue, making the three of them blink up at her, not understanding a word of what she just said.

But then his manager chuckled, amusedly shaking his head. "Don't you love it when she curses in spanish?" he asked, pointing at the woman in question with his thumb. "Makes it sound so classy and exotic."

"I just called you a beast, you… insensible desgraciado!" she finished, again, turning to her mother language.

He chuckled, secretly agreeing with his manager. There was something about hearing her curse in spanish that was just amusing. Even if no one ever had a clue of what she said whenever she switched to her mother tongue, going ballistic at times, stomping her foot to the floor and waving her hands around.

Yes, he really liked this woman. She was definitively fun to be around.

She growled, calming herself down and shaking her head, before looking up at him, rubbing a comforting hand to his back. "Don't listen to them," she advised. "They're crazy morons."

"Crazy morons that know what they're talking about," the guitarist put in, smiling triumphal, not in the least offended by her comment.

"Shut up," the drummer grunted, rolling her black eyes before her smile came back to her features as she smiled up to him. "A baby… wow. I mean… wow!"

He chuckled at her enthusiasm, nodding his head. "Yeah, it's… it's pretty amazing."

"Yeah!" she exclaimed, nodding her head. "Can you imagine a tiny little Haruka? So cute!"

"What if the baby looks like daddy, here, huh?" Katashi asked, arching an eyebrow to the now dreamingly smiling woman.

"Oh, hush!" she exclaimed. "You're ruining the pretty picture!" she complained, waving a hand around as she opened the door to the studio.

They all followed her in, with only his manager staying behind, going for the switch room instead.

"You really do have the hots for her, don't you?" Katashi asked, following the dark woman as she carelessly threw her coat on the chair behind to then take her place on the drums.

One black eyebrow went up at that. "Have you _seen_ her?"

Katashi turned to look at him at that. "It's official," he announced, patting his shoulder. "Mora's out to steal your woman."

"Just because I think she's hot, doesn't mean I want to bang her, ok?" she defended herself, as an offended frown came to her features. But then she smiled. "I totally would if she were single, though."

Under any other circumstances, he thought he probably wouldn't find the comment funny, not appreciating someone else fantasying about his girlfriend. And he was aware of the fact that, if things were different, Mora would probably have a shot with the racer; she was a very beautiful woman herself.

The news about Mora's sexuality didn't surprise him; he had suspected it the moment he first saw her. He didn't want to be judgmental, but there was just something about her that screamed lesbian. In any case, who she chose to share her bed with was none of his business, and he honestly didn't care. Although the thought wasn't exactly a pleasant one, he took it all as just the drummer's way of complementing the racer -and probably his own taste in women-, while fooling around a little. And, in all honesty, he had to agree with her; the racer really was a beautiful woman, and a baby version of her, with soft green eyes and a mop of soft blonde hair surely did make a pretty picture. One that made his heart jump and melt, all at once.

An honest, small smile made it to his lips at that last thought. Even with how crazy everything was right now, how messed up his head was and how confused he was about pretty much everything, the idea of a baby, of holding his own child in his arms made him happy.

"See?" Katashi said, pointing an accusing finger her way.

But Mora ignored him, waving her drumsticks around. "I don't go after other people's ladies," she informed. "It's bad for my bed karma."

He chuckled again at her serious, set expression, shaking his head amusedly. "Alright, guys," he said, throwing his own coat and scarf to the sofa and placing himself in front of the microphone as he arranged the guitar's strap around his shoulder. "Let's get this over with so we can all go home."

"Can't wait to go back to your woman?" Katashi teased.

But Seiya ignored him.

Closing his eyes, he stroke his guitar, focusing. Forgetting all about the awkward conversation on the hallway, he held on to the feeling the picture of his child had just brought to him. Leaving everything else behind, he concentrated on that one feeling, on the tender happiness that made his heart jump up inside his ribcage.

With his eyes closed, he sang, finally able to pour real feeling into his music.


	29. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. Please, do not steal it!

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><p>Little star, so you had to go.<br>You must have wanted him to know.  
>You must have wanted the world to know.<br>Poor little thing.  
>Now they know.<p>

Little star,  
>I had to close my eyes.<br>There was a fire at the warehouse.  
>They're always waiting for a thing like this.<br>For you, little star.  
>Little star, you, little star.<p>

Little star, so you had to go.  
>You must have wanted him to know.<br>You must have wanted the world to know.  
>Poor little thing.<br>And now they know.

(…)

**(Little star - Stina Nordenstam)**

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><p><strong>28<strong>

A new song filled the room, and Minako's loud, happy squeal followed, as the blonde started jumping and dancing, ecstatic. Usagi was fast to follow her, and the blonde duo started dancing and laughing to the song. Ami and Michiru laughed at their dancing, as Makoto was fast to gulp down the content of her glass before joining her friends, dragging Hotaru out to dance with them.

And he chuckled at the picture they made, dancing and laughing. They surely knew how to take up any opportunity to have a good time and just celebrate. Sure, they had a valid reason to celebrate tonight, but Seiya knew they could always find one reason or another to do so.

A hand coming to hang from his forearm got his attention, making him turn to the young woman now standing next to him, as her dark raven eyes watched the dancing women.

"They love this stupid song," came Rei's only half mocking comment, as she was obviously in the party mood too. Though, judging by her comment, she was not particularly fond of the current song.

"It's catchy," he commented, shaking a shoulder.

"Yeah," the Miko agreed. "But after the umpteenth time, it just gives you a headache."

He laughed, both at her comment and at her annoyed face, as she just rolled her eyes, taking a sip from her punch glass, easily hanging from his arm.

They were at the Outer household again. This time though, they were celebrating the New Year.

Originally, the party was meant to be held somewhere else. But after their plans of having the party at Minako's parents house went out the window when they decided to spent the New Year here instead of making their -apparently traditional- trip to London, Setsuna came to the rescue, offering the house for the party. With all the food, drinks and decorations already brought, Minako had been more than happy to accept the offer and have the party here instead.

He didn't particularly mind where the party was being held at. But he had to admit, spending it here sure made it easier for him to keep an eye on one tall blonde woman, making sure she wouldn't be going back home at a late hour while there were -surely- many reckless, drunken teenagers driving around, going from party to party. Of course, he had already decided to be the one taking her back home, but now that they were spending the New Year here, there was no need for him to play chauffeur; Michiru had already stated the racer would be spending the night over, at her old bedroom. And Seiya was sure, the blonde knew better than to argue with the violinist when such a determinate, serious look was decorating her face.

It was actually kind of scary; firm, hard, kind of cold. It reminded him once more why Sailor Neptune made such an imposing Senshi…

Though Haruka was now officially allowed to leave the bed -or couch…- and walk around, everyone was still keeping a close eye on her. He had insisted on going with her to see her doctor, not only to make sure the blonde followed the doctor's orders, but also because he wanted to be there.

He wanted to be there every time. To see his baby slowly growing, hearing the fast, choppy sound of its heartbeat.

There were no words to describe how it felt. It was more than amazing. Touching, breathtaking… he really couldn't find the words, and he simply wanted to be there.

"So, how are you?" Rei's question brought him back and out of his own thoughts, making him turn his face to look at her. "How's… you know, everything?"

He took a deep breath, trying to decide how to answer to that question. But when nothing came to mind, he sighed, tilting his head to a side. "Fine, I guess," he ventured. "I've been advised not to over think things," he then added, chuckling lightly. "Easier said than done, but… I'm kind of sticking to that plan for now."

"How's that going for you?" Mamoru's voice got their attention, as the black haired young man came to stand right next to Rei, in front of Seiya. Handing him a bottle of beer, the Prince raised his own, both in silent toast and in greeting before taking a sip.

"It's… going," he finally answered, accepting the beer and taking a sip himself.

"These kind of things have a tendency to work out in the end," Mamoru said. "We just never know how it's gonna turn out until it does."

"Right," Rei agreed, smiling up to him. "Like you and Haruka," she added. "I mean, four years ago, what were the odds?"

Two black eyebrows went up at that, as he let out a heavy sigh. "One in a billion?" he guessed, only half joking.

"There were bets going on," Rei said, smiling amusedly. And then she laughed sheepishly when Seiya just blinked at her. "Can you blame us? We all thought it was only a matter of time before one of you would end up killing the other."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," he said, kind of offended now.

"We just didn't know which one of you would be the one committing the crime," Mamoru added for Rei, chuckling lightly. "Yet you guys made it, and here we are now."

He let out a sigh at that, scratching his cheeks awkwardly. "Yeah, I just don't know where 'here' is, exactly," he admitted.

The smiles they gave to him then was both reassuring and knowing, as if they were able to see something he just wasn't seeing.

"As long as you follow what's in here," Rei said, gently tapping his chest, right over his heart, "then you'll be fine."

.-.

Something flashed in front of midnight blue eyes as the singer seemed to be considering something. Thinking, weighing his options. Contemplating.

There were many ways to call it, but the end result was still the same. Though unable to stop himself -evidently-, the guy was in denial and seemed unable or unwilling to move on from that state. He was scared of getting anywhere near deciphering his own feelings. He was probably considering things that shouldn't be considered in matters of the heart, and the end result was the confusing state he was stuck in.

The only way for him to get out of that position was with a moment of naked honesty. Both, with himself and with the racer.

"She's outside," he said, vaguely pointing at the general direction of the sliding doors that led to the backyard.

Seiya blinked up to him, once, before a frown came to his features. And he had to sympathize with the guy.

He usually didn't like to get involved in other people's private business. He wasn't much of an expert himself, and he only gave out advice when asked. But the guy was his friend -even if he didn't quite remember that fact right now-, and so was Haruka. And in this particular case, he had to agree with Usagi; Seiya had been beating around the bush and getting nowhere for too long already.

How much could a little push hurt?

"In case you were wondering," he added, smiling knowingly when a light blush came to take claim on Seiya's cheeks.

And when, finally, Seiya chuckled, nervously announcing he was going to check on her, Mamoru nodded his approval, stepping to a side and letting him walk away.

"Don't forget your coat!" Rei exclaimed after Seiya's retreating figure, before letting out a sigh and leaning in against him, as now her resting arm was gone. "You think he'll snap out of it?"

He smiled. "I have faith in him."

"_Before_ it's too late?" Rei added, arching a questioning, only half joking eyebrow.

Again, he smiled. "We just have to wait and see," he said, smiling down to her. "Now, the question is, are you gonna let them have all the fun?" he asked, pointing at his own girlfriend and the rest of the happily dancing young women.

Rei snorted, flickering one long lock of hair off her shoulder. "Of course not," she said, shoving her nose up in the air. "And neither are you, mister," she then added, stepping behind him in one fast motion and pushing him. "You're gonna come and dance with us!"

"Come on, Rei! You know I'm not good at this!"

The smile that came to the raven girl's lips as she circled him to pull from his forearms was positively scary. "Whining doesn't suit you, Prince."

Was she mocking him?

.-.

It was a beautiful night, and she was perfectly able to see the stars, shining proudly and brightly in the night sky.

For now, at least. The moment the fireworks start, they would occupy the entire sky, making her little stargazing activity harder. But for now, she was enjoying the star show right in front of her eyes.

She wasn't really lectured on the area, and she only knew the very basics. But she was able to spot her Guarding planet, close to Cetus. She had no idea which one Cetus was, but she remember reading that somewhere, and the name just stuck with her for whatever reason. And she also remembered one of the many bright stars shining near her Guardian was, just like Uranus, no star at all, but actually a planet.

Seiya had pointed it out to her once, and she remembered finding it ironic how close their planets were in the sky. What she couldn't remember was which one it was. And so she was out there, feather gray cardigan sweater over her light cream turtleneck cashmere sweater, her sheepskin coat over her legs to keep her warm as she sat there on the bench that has been moved to the side of the house, trying to figure out which one of the shining stars was the one she was looking for.

She played with the necklace around her neck, lifting it up to her chin and mindlessly playing with the pendant in one hand, as she held to Kalina's leash with the other. The dog was peacefully resting at her feet and didn't seem willing to go anywhere anytime soon, but she still held on to the leash; she knew the fireworks would scare her, and she really didn't want to have to run chasing after her.

She loved that dog. And if in her scare Kalina took off running, Haruka knew she would never see her again.

It was the one and only condition she had made for her to agree to come spend the night here. With people going crazy the second the clock marked midnight and the night sky filling with fireworks, she just wasn't risking it, leaving her pup all alone and scare. Miraculously -or maybe because their overprotective attack was still on-, both Setsuna and Michiru had accepted, agreeing to let her bring her dog.

With green eyes glued to the sky, she let out a sigh. She could always ask Yaten or Taiki. Or even Seiya. They were on a more friendly ground now, so there wouldn't be nothing wrong with her asking him. But then there was the very real possibility of him -or any of them- asking why was she searching for it in the first place.

Why was she looking for it? Why now? Why not some other night?

She didn't know. She just wanted to find it in the night sky.

"Hey."

She straightened up on her seat, not needing to look up to recognize his voice. But she did look up anyway, only to find him standing right next to her, warmly and curiously smiling down to her.

"Hey, girl," he said, patting Kalina's head tenderly, before looking up at the sky. "Beautiful night."

"Yeah," she agreed, vaguely nodding her head as she looked up again.

"Mind if I…?" he trailed off, pointing at the bench she was sitting on.

She shook her head, moving to a side and making room for him to sit down.

He smiled to her, taking the offered space and sitting down next to her. But before he could make himself comfortable, he took his coat off, placing it over her shoulders instead.

And she rolled her eyes at the gesture. "Could you _not_ be so chivalrous all the time?" she said, annoyed at the light blush that somehow managed to burn her cheeks.

"I'm not," he said, chuckling lightly, obviously amused. "Just keeping the baby warm."

"Right," she snorted, rolling her eyes.

She didn't want to pressure him or push him or force him into anything. Whatever he decided to do, she wanted him to do it because he wanted to. But, damn it, did he absolutely had to be so close now? Acting all charming? It was so hard to control herself. She wanted to hold him. To take his hands and interlace their fingers, nesting his hand into her chest and caressing the back of his wrist. Her fingers ached to run themselves through his hair…

She shook her head, turning her face back to the night sky. She had hoped he would get his memory back by now…

"That one, right there?" he said, pointing a finger up, right to the small, blueish dot her Guardian was up in the sky, "that's Uranus."

She smiled, nodding her head. "I know," she said. "I just can't figure out which one is Cetus."

He hummed softly for a moment, thinking, before finally pointing it to her. "That one," he said. "And that's Aquarius."

She frowned curiously at that. "Where?" she asked, following his finger and trying to see the constellation.

Reacomodating himself on the bench, he turned slightly to a side, getting behind her just enough so that their line of vision was as similar as possible. Taking her hand in his, he raised them up, pointing with her own finger at the stars.

Her heart sped up, and she could feel the warmth emanating from him. His perfume reached her nostrils, and she tried hard to block it all out as he draw an imaginary line, connecting the stars.

"Right… there," he said, guiding her hand through the night sky. "That's Pisces," he continued, guiding her hand to the left, "and right over it, Pegasus."

She followed his guide looking at the stars. A smile coming to her lips as she was now able to see the constellations. "I didn't know you were such an expert," she commented.

Letting her hand go, he shook his shoulder, still gazing up. "You kinda have to when traveling around the universe," he pointed out. "It looks different from Kinmoku, though," he then added as an afterthought, with his midnight blues glued to the sky.

"Which one is it?" she asked softly, huskily, turning to look at him. "Kinmoku," she offered, when he just stared at her.

A soft, melancholic smile came to his lips then, and she felt like kicking herself for even asking. But he raised his hand again all the same, pointing out a small star close to her own Guardian, right next to Aquarius.

"With a telescope, you'd be able to see three stars around it," he said. "They're actually Kinmoku's moons, one for each guardian," he explained. "But they look like stars from here."

He spoke in a low, soft tone, with a lingering sadness to it. And now she felt really bad for asking. She felt guilty for reminding him his home planet was no longer really there, and for reminding him everything that came along with that. And she just sat there, not knowing what to say, with her hands buried in her sheepskin coat, looking at him as a thoughtful, dreamlike look fell upon midnight blue eyes.

"I'm not an expert, I just have a thing for stars," he finally said, leaning against the back of the bench and letting out a sigh. And then he smiled, rather sheepishly. "When I was a kid, I used to spend hours watching the sky," he confessed. "They were my first love."

She smiled at that, chuckling lightly. Coming from him, that made sense…

"Mine was a car," she joked, searching for her necklace again and mindedly playing with the pendant.

It wasn't really a joke, but he didn't…

"I know. Ferrari Testarossa."

.-.

With his eyes still glued to the sky, he frowned.

He didn't know how he knew that. The words just came to his mouth and he said them without even realizing. And the short, sharp, low gasp that reached his ears and the way she seemed to have stopped breathing told him the words had been correct.

He risked a look her way.

Green eyes wide and opened, lips parted. One hand under the coat she kept over her legs, the other frozen in mid air, holding her necklace's pendant. And she just sat there, staring at him, frozen to the spot.

Only her eyes moved, searching. And she didn't need him to voice the question dancing in her eyes for him to know what she was silently asking -hoping. And he wished he could give her what she wanted. What she so obviously longed for.

"I… don't know how I know that…" he finally said.

And he really didn't. He just knew it.

It was something that was just starting to happen. He would suddenly know things he didn't remember knowing or finding out. Like which had been the first car that had caught her eye when she was nothing but a little ten year old. Or the fact that she hated natto, and, after first cutting it herself when she was fourteen, she had made a vow to never let her hair grow again. A vow born out of annoyance and not wanting to deal with tangled hair all the time that she had kept to this day.

Somehow, he just knew all these things.

"I just…" he trailed off, now feeling guilty as he saw that hope that had been shining in her eyes just now dying away, being replaced by sadness. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head then, giving him a sided, half felt smile. "Don't be," she said, huskily. "It's… it's ok," she said, going to play with her necklace again as she crossed her free hand over her chest.

"Is it?" he asked, gently. "I…" he trailed off, trying to come up with the right words.

Gently, not wanting to disturb her any further, but unable to stop himself, he reached out for her necklace. Taking the pendant from her hands, he inspected it, studying it, searching his mind.

"I gave you this," he said, looking up and into her green eyes.

Again, he didn't know how he knew that. He just did. Inexplicably, but with undeniable certainty, he knew that that necklace, which pendant was shaped in the form of angel's wings, had been a gift from him. He didn't know what the occasion had been, but he could clearly see himself picking it up.

"_Ten! Nine! Eight!_" the countdown began, and he turned his face around for a moment, looking at the portion of the backyard he could see from their spot.

With the pendant still in his hand, he looked at it once more, before looking up into wide, shining green eyes. And the look in her eyes right now was mesmerizing.

She looked so vulnerable, so fragile. And so scared to hope, as she just looked at him, eyes wide and opened and shining with so much longing, so much love. It was so easy to drown in them, to get lost into the depths of those emeralds, breathing in that soft scent he was slowly starting to recognize as her; a mix between vanilla and gardenia and just… her.

He felt more than heard her gasping, as green eyes flickered down to his lips. And then they were back into his own blue ones, filled with uncertainty and longing, fear and yearn. She was the incarnation of contradiction as she just sat there, inches apart from him.

"_Five! Four! Three!_"

Forgetting all the reasons why he wanted to take things slow, unable to find them or even remember them, only one thought occupied his mind. All he wanted to do, all he could think of right now, was to meet the distance between their faces and capture her slightly trembling lips with his.

And as the countdown came to an end, he didn't even realize he was doing exactly that. Her agitated breath caressed his lips -she was nervous, he noted-, their noses brushed together, and on their own accord, his eyes flickered to her parted lips before drifting close.

"_Happy New Year!_"

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><p><strong>A.N.: <strong>don't hate me too much for this! Though you will hate me, because I have absolutely no idea when I'd be able to write (let alone _post_...) next chap. I will try to get it done by next weekend, but I can't really promise much because... well, I'm busy.

Anyway! In the meantime... any thoughts?

**(sometime in the future) in Remember me?: **"Would you stay with me?"


	30. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. So please don't steal it!

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Call me and I will come.  
>See how I will run.<br>It's been so many years but,  
>you're still the one.<br>Just call my name and I will come.

Ready as I can be.  
>Know you'll send for me.<br>And I'll be waiting here,  
>so patiently.<br>I'm ready now as I can be.

Maybe I'm a fool  
>loving you like I do.<br>But I miss you every day,  
>and I see you in everything.<br>You're every sound I hear and  
>every word I say.<br>I miss you more every day.

Maybe I'm a fool  
>but hope is all I have to hold on to.<p>

So call me and I will come.  
>See how I will run.<br>It's been so many years but,  
>you're still the one.<br>Just call my name, and I will come.

**(Call me - Edwina Hayes)**

* * *

><p><strong>29<strong>

It all happened at once.

One moment she was victim of his eyes' spell, of him, and was just about to kiss him, and the next the moment was gone. Multicolor fireworks exploded, loud and bright, making her feel as if someone had just lighted a lamp right at her face, and Kalina woke up from her nap, whining and scared. Jumping up to her, front limbs on her thighs, the dog sought for refugee, burying her snout in her belly, right under the arm she had across her own stomach.

She snapped back to reality, straightening her back and turning her face away from Seiya's, looking down her dog instead. Holding on to the leash just in case Kalina decided to run, she scratched the back of her ears reassuringly, trying to comfort her trembling puppy, as she both cursed and thanked any high being up there.

She had been so close…

It would have been such a mistake. Kissing him again, when she was painfully aware of the fact that, not only he still didn't remember anything, but he was just as confused as ever. Or maybe even more so. No matter how much she had wanted it, how much she still wanted it, kissing him would only make things worse.

Blue eyes looked up at her for a moment as Kalina whined again, before turning to look at Seiya, brushing her wet, cold nose against his hand. Touched at her dog, how scared she was and how she sought for refugee in them, she chuckled, relieved at having been saved from such a close call, and still feeling awkward because of it.

"It's ok, girl," she heard Seiya saying, as he tenderly petted the dog's head and she whined in returned. "It's ok," he said, reassuringly.

She risked to look at him just as he looked up at her, and she smiled awkwardly, not knowing how to break the strange atmosphere the almost moment had created.

He shook his shoulder, tilting his head to a side and smiling, albeit a bit embarrassed himself. "Good call keeping the leash on," he said, looking down at Kalina again.

"Yeah," she said, scratching the back of her neck. "Didn't want her running away or anything."

"Yeah…" he agreed, nodding awkwardly.

He was only trying to break the uncomfortable, weird silence the New Year had just brought with it, and she knew it. She knew him that well. And a part of her was hurt by it, by the almost kiss and the almost moment of something so simple, so small; something they had shared so many times before and yet it felt so foreign now. But the rational pat of her brain pushed the feeling aside, silently thanking him for at least trying; for the effort to break the strange moment, as well as the intention of at least trying to spend some time with her.

Yet, she couldn't help herself. She wanted more. So much more…

He cleared his throat then, scratching the back of his head awkwardly.

Sometimes, this being friends with him was so hard…

"Papa?"

She straightened herself up, looking up at the sound of her daughter's voice.

"Over here," she called out as a smile made it to her lips then, silently welcoming the distraction from the current situation she was in.

Hotaru's face appeared from around the corner of the house, and the girl stopped on her tracks for a moment when seeing the both of them sitting on the bench. But she played it off. Not letting go of Kalina's leash, she smiled up to her daughter, extending both her arms up and towards her, silently asking for a hug in a rather childish manner.

But she didn't care. And Hotaru didn't seem to mind much either, as the big, happy smile returned to the girl's soft features and she jumped up, happily going to her and giving the requested hug.

"Happy New Year, papa!"

"Happy new Year, kiddo," she wished back, as she made room so Hotaru could sit down with them.

It meant less space in the bench, and being even closer to Seiya. But it also meant no more awkward moments, no more getting lost in midnight blues, and no more almost kissing. Not with Hotaru right there with them, at least.

For now, she was safe.

"I'm not a kid anymore," the teenager complained, frowning cutely.

She chuckled, ruffling Hotaru's soft hair. "Yeah, you are," she teased.

Purple eyes rolled at her, and the girl snorted, leaning forward and resting her elbows over her knees to look at the singer instead. "Happy New Year, Seiya."

"Happy New Year to you too," he said, gifting her with a gentle, honest smile.

Blue eyes flickered into her green ones for a moment as he slightly nodded his head, and she knew the words were as meant to Hotaru as they were for her. He was just still feeling a bit taken aback to say them.

Yes, she was thankful for Hotaru's presence and the distraction she represented right now. More than the girl could know.

Or maybe she did know, Haruka thought, as Hotaru leaned in on her, resting her head on her shoulder and looking up at the illuminated sky. Letting out a sigh, she encircled one arm around the girl's shoulders, gently and mindlessly playing with her velvet like hair, letting go of Kalina's leash and holding the collar instead, soothingly caressing the soft fur under her jaw.

She could still feel the warmth from Seiya's body. His perfume still reached her nostrils.

Blocking the sounds of the others celebrating inside the house, she looked up at the sky. Forcing that hollowing feeling inside her chest to a side, forgetting about everything that was wrong right now, about everything that was missing; if she concentrated in nothing but Hotaru's head on her shoulder, Kalina's snout against her stomach and Seiya's warmth right beside her, for a moment, it felt as if everything was alright.

.-.

"Should I wake her?" Taiki asked, frowning. "I can take her to…"

"No, let her sleep," Setsuna put in, shaking her head. "She can stay here."

"We can't leave her _here_," Michiru said, frowning. She stood next to the couch with her chin in one hand, holding her elbow with the other in a thoughtful manner that, considering the surroundings, the time the clock hanging from the wall on marked, and the person the violinist was contemplating, it seemed far more amused than actually thoughtful.

It was late. Really, really late. All the guests were already gone by now, either to some other party, to sleep, or to have a more private New Year party celebration, considering how many 'couples' he had seen around before people finally started leaving elsewhere.

He didn't have any plans, except maybe curling up under the covers and sleep like a little baby until well past midday. But there was no rush in going to hug his pillow, so he had stayed longer, helping clean up the Outers' household. Taiki had stayed behind to help as well, while Yaten had taken the Inners' gang minus one and act as chauffeur, considering their usual designated driver had decided she would not control and hold herself tonight. After Setsuna had assured them it was alright to leave one member behind to sleep, Makoto had happily announced she was in no condition to drive, and just like that, she handed her car keys to Yaten.

Well, at least Makoto was responsible. He had to give her that much. And Yaten didn't seem to mind, accepting the keys and disappearing with the rest of them, with Mamoru and Usagi right behind them on the Prince's car.

So here he was now, trash bag in hand, picking up empty glasses and plates alike. But the conversation made him turn around to look at the trio looking down on the small blue ball sleeping on the couch, and he chuckled.

Though she had been in the party mood earlier, one simple glass of champagne had seemed to be more than enough for Ami to get happily drunk and then just call it a night, camping on the couch. He knew the doctor had been tired, with her hours and shifts at the hospital and all, so he guessed her getting so easily drunk had more to do with tiredness than a lack of resistance to alcohol. Though maybe the bluenette wasn't as used to it as her friends…

"Her back will resent it for a week," Michiru was saying.

"You're exaggerating," Setsuna said.

"I'm not."

"When have you _ever_ slept on that couch?" the Time Keeper inquired, arching a questioning eyebrow.

"Oh, I haven't. But Haruka had," the violinist said. "And complained about it for _days_," she emphasized with a shake of her shoulders. "_Every_ single time."

Setsuna chuckled, shaking her head and turning to look at an amused looking Taiki. "For someone who complains so much about how uncomfortable that couch is," she said, amused as well, "that blonde surely has a habit of falling asleep on it."

"We should move her upstairs," Michiru proposed. "She can sleep in Hotaru's room. I doubt she'd be back until late in the morning."

"Or the afternoon," Setsuna added. "Teenagers these days…" she then added under her breath, shaking her head.

"I'll take her," he offered, leaving the trash bag beside the coffee table that was still in need to be clean out as he walked up to them.

"No, man, you just broke your ribs…" Taiki started to complain the second he went to lift the sleeping girl.

He ignored him, taking Ami up in his arms. "I'm fine," he said. "Besides, she's as light as a feather," he soon added, finding no need to lie about it. The girl was, after all, petite and slim.

"Come on, I'll guide you," Setsuna offered, gently tapping his shoulder as she started to lead the way to the stairs. "I want to check on sleeping beauty and the beast."

"You're mixing up your stories again," Michiru teased.

"No, I'm not," the dark green haired woman defended herself, not bothering with turning around as she started making her way up the stairs. "It's called making a free adaptation."

He chuckled at the joke, shaking his head amused as he followed the tall woman up the stairs.

Entering the room Setsuna pointed out, he deposited the sleeping young woman over the bed, placing the covers over her petite form. And he smiled at the way she was fast to curl herself into a ball in her sleep, turning to lay on her side and burying her head on the pillow. It was a rather cute sight.

Not having to worry about shoes, knowing those were somewhere downstairs, long forgotten, he left the task of undressing the doctor to either Setsuna or Michiru.

Haruka had retired to sleep earlier. No one had complained about it, considering how she was probably tired, and too sober in comparison to their guests. And though the Guardian of Time said she was checking on her, he knew Setsuna was only upstairs to make sure Kalina was not busy watering the carpets or eating her shoes. As much as she liked dogs, the olive skinned woman was not fond of the idea of actually having one herself. Or more accurately, she was not fond of the idea of having one inside the house. She had expensive shoes, expensive clothes, and was always working on one dress or skirt or another, and she certainly didn't want a puppy anywhere near her belongings; a fact he had been told of on several occasions over the night, whenever one tall racer would tease the olive skinned woman.

And the almost yell that reached his ears as he walked out of the room proved him right on his suspicion.

"What is she doing there?" came Setsuna's -almost outraged- question.

"Keeping me company," was Haruka's easy answer.

Following the voices, he walked down the hallway and to the last door, peeking in from the doorway. With her hands on her hips and a frown decorating her features, Setsuna was looking down on both at the silver ball of fur curled on the bed's end, and on the smugly smiling blonde under the covers.

"And keeping my feet warm," the racer added, if only to annoy the dark green haired woman further.

"You didn't say anything about the dog sleeping on the bed," Setsuna argued.

"You never said she couldn't."

"Because I didn't know she…" she exclaimed, and then growled, interrupting herself. "Now I'm going to have to wash the covers!"

"It's a _dog_, not the end of bed covers as we know them," Haruka complained, rolling her green eyes.

"It's a ball of fur that will leave hair all over it," Setsuna pointed out. "And I'm the one left here to clean it all up."

The blonde frowned at that, getting out from under the covers and going to hug her dog. "You're hurting her feelings!" she exclaimed.

As if on cue, Kalina whined, and Haruka took the dog's face in both her hands, looking at her. "Don't listen to the old, mean wench," she said. "You're beautiful."

Magenta eyes narrowed at the blonde. "I'm not old," she corrected the blonde. But when Haruka just arched an eyebrow and chuckled, the olive skinned woman flickered one long strand of dark green hair off her shoulder, pointing her nose up in the air. "I don't _get_ old," she corrected herself, "unlike some _other_ people I know."

"Nice comeback!" Haruka exclaimed, smiling approvingly now. "Didn't burn at all, because it basically means I'm normal and you're _not_," she continued teasing, "but still. Nice comeback."

He chuckled at their bickering, resting his shoulder on the door frame and burying his hands on his pockets. This was another one of his recent discoveries; the Outers' teasing and bickering was always fun to watch.

Kalina barked happily at him, obviously too comfortable on her spot over the bed to actually greet him, and two pairs of eyes turned to him for a moment before Setsuna turned back to look at the blonde.

"You better keep her inside this room," she warned, as she turned back around, ready to leave the room. "I don't want her leaving hair all over the place and making a mess."

"Drama queen."

"You," Setsuna said, pointing a finger at him. "Make sure she stays here," she then ordered, marching at the door. "Both of them!"

And with that, the olive skinned woman left the room, all but slamming the door behind her. And he shrunk his shoulders, keeping his hands on his pockets and turning back around to look at the blonde still on the bed's end, petting her dog.

"She's a bit mad," he said, pointing the obvious.

"Nah," Haruka said, shaking her shoulder. "She's just oversensitive about her handmade covers, that's all."

"Or maybe she just likes arguing with you and that's just the way you guys are," he guessed, teasingly.

She chuckled. Green eyes lightening up at his words as she shook her head lightly, amused. "Maybe," she mumbled.

She chuckled again, caressing Kalina's ears one last time before letting out a sigh. Moving back to her previous spot on the bed, she rearranged the covers over her legs.

"You don't have to babysit me, you know?" she said, not looking up.

He blinked, once, before a frown came to his face. "I wasn't… I…" he mumbled, suddenly feeling awkward. "I just… wanted to check on you."

The smile she gave him then was a fake one. He could tell, because it didn't reach her eyes.

"I'm fine. Just tired, that's all."

He knew that was his cue to leave. It had been a weird enough night, and though a part of him didn't want to, he knew it was time to leave her alone.

"I'll leave to rest, then," he said, nodding his head. "Have a good night."

"You too."

He nodded his head her way one last time, turning back around. But as he reached up a hand to open up the door and leave her to rest, her husky voice reached his ears again as she called out to him.

And the way she said his name just now, so full of uncertainty, so unlike the proud, strong woman he knew her to be. So much like the broken woman he had seen crying in Taiki's arms, back at Makoto's birthday party. It brought a prick of guilt, stabbing him deep within his heart. And as he held his hand in mid air, he knew he didn't want to turn around and find that hurt, that well hidden, contained pain dancing in green emeralds.

But when he turned around, though that pain was in there, it was now taking a second place. And it surprised him to find shyness in there, as she fidgeted with the covers.

"Would you… um…"

"Yes?" he asked, gently, in a cooping tone he hoped would help her ask whatever it was she wanted to ask him.

She let out a sigh then, probably exasperated with herself as she let her eyes travelled around the room for a moment. Taking a deep breath, her eyes finally landed on his midnight blues, and she raised her hands up in the air, if it was either in a surrendering manner, or as a way to make herself say the words, he wasn't sure.

"Would you stay with me?"

He blinked.

Of all the things he was half expecting her to ask or say, that was definitively not it. Did he hear her right? Was she… What was she asking, exactly?

"You don't have to sleep here," she was fast to add. "Or hug me, or anything like that. Just… stay until I fall asleep?"

He blinked again, out of words. "I… um…" he mumbled, scratching the back of his neck.

How was he supposed to answer to that? She caught him completely off guard with such a request, and considering that weird moment that had transpired between them just a few hours ago and how strange and confusing everything still felt to him, he really didn't know how to answer to that without making things even more strange and weird.

"Forget it," she then said, shaking her head and lowering her eyes. "It's stupid, I know."

She was making an excellent job avoiding his eyes now, but he caught the disappointment and embarrassment dancing in there. It bothered him, to say the least, knowing he was the cause of her sadness.

Even if she kept on trying to hide it away from him.

"Just forget it."

"No, it's ok."

She blinked up at him, surprised at his words.

And he was surprised too. But he simply couldn't stand watching her like this. He much rather seeing her laughing and teasing her friends, than this sad and disappointed and insecure about herself.

And, what harm could it do? He could just stay there until she fell asleep. He could think all about what it, trying to figure out once more what his feelings were for the tall racer in the security of his apartment. He could lay there, staring up at the ceiling and questioning himself without having to worry about saying or doing the wrong thing and hurting her.

"I can stay for a while," he said, offering her a small, understanding smile as he shook his shoulders.

"Really?" she asked, frowning and blinking in surprised. "I mean…"

"Yeah, no problem."

The smile that came to her lips then, soft and smile, and with a clear hint of shyness as a light tint of red came to her cheeks, was positively adorable. And it warmed up his heart, making him smile in return.

.-.

The words just left her mouth before she could think straight, and so she was surprised for him to agree to her request.

She just hadn't been able to sleep well for so long now and she was so tired, she figured that, maybe, with him there, she would be able to rest. Just knowing he was there, and breathing in his scent, feeling the warmth of his body close to hers, even if he wasn't holding her close. Even if she wasn't using him as her pillow, like she used to do.

"Ok," she said, moving to a side and making room for him to sit on the bed.

He took the offered space, sitting down on the mattress and resting his back over the headboard, using the extra pillows to cushion his neck and back. He took a deep breath and turned to look at her, chuckling lightly.

"All good?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said, smiling softly in content. Right now, everything was good. Making a ball out of herself and getting everything but her face under the covers, she rested her face on the pillow, looking up at him. "Thank you," she whispered huskily.

"You're welcome, Haruka," he said, in that soft, low tone of his. "Good night."

"Good night."

.-.

Dawn was just about to break in the horizon when the bedroom door opened up.

Blue eyes opened up and Kalina lift her head up and to a side, curiously looking at the now opened door and the person peeking in. Not abandoning her spot on the floor, right at the bed's end after moving there some point earlier in the night.

The dog whimpered softly, more out of sleepy curiosity than anything, and a smile made it to the young woman's lips. Careful enough not to make any noise that would wake the sleeping couple on the bed, she walked into the room, grabbing Kalina's collar.

"Come on, girl. Let's leave them alone for a while."

.

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><p>Next on <strong>Remember me?<strong>:

"She misses you. Don't you miss her too?"

"I… Yes."

"Then kiss it and make it all better! Like, when it hurts, you kiss it and make it better."


	31. Chapter 30

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. So please don't steal it!

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><p><strong>30<strong>

He was standing in the middle of a field. The sun shone brightly in the sky; the silhouettes of the moons clear and beautifully big on the horizon, as they always were on sunny days.

He knew that field. It was the one he used to go to when he was a kid. Running around, climbing up trees, riding his horse and imagining he was a courageous warrior, a soldier, defending and protecting the land. And as a part of him wished to do exactly that, to be like a kid again and run wild and carefree, the grownup side of his brain wondered what exactly was he doing there.

He hadn't been on that field since he was ten years old.

What was he doing here? And more importantly, how had he ended up here?

Where had he been just now? A deep frown came to his features then. He blinked, looking down on the ever green grass as if it would provide him some sort of answer, when something else caught his attention and he blinked again, curiously this time.

There was laughter in the air. A happy, childish laughter.

He blinked again, curiously, before deciding to follow the sound.

Walking passed the tall trees, right in the middle of a clear in between bushes and branches and trees, he found the source of the happy laughter. Arms spread around and head tilted up to the sky, a girl that couldn't be older than five was spinning around. With her lithe light green dress flying all around her small legs and her soft, jet black hair, lose and short dancing around her face as she spun, fast.

Maybe a little bit too fast.

But then she seemed to trip on her own bare feet and she fell to the ground. "Oh!" she exclaimed, tottering in her spot, obviously dizzy.

He jumped up immediately. That was a rather hard fall, hitting her behind like that, and as he saw the kid blinking a few times, he wondered if she was just about to start crying. But to his surprise, the girl just broke into happy laughter once more, even if she seemed to still be light headed.

He approached her, kneeling next to the laughing girl.

"Hi!" the girl exclaimed, going to stand up only to fall back on her behind again. And she laughed again, obviously too happy, for whatever reason.

"Are you alright?"

The girl nodded her head several times at that, as she placed her little hands on the grass, trying to gain her balance back. "Yeah," she said, standing up and brushing wild bangs out of her eyes. "That was fun!" she then exclaimed, jumping up and clapping her hands excitedly.

He chuckled.

Yes, he remembered having his share of fun doing exactly that when he was just about her age, too. But he also remembered his parents telling him not to go there alone and do exactly that, saying he could get hurt and no one would be there to help him. Of course he never understood back then, but he did see the point now, as he wondered where this kid's parents were, and what was she doing out here alone.

"Hey, kid," he said, placing his hands on the girl's shoulders and stopping her from jumping. "Where are your parents? Are you here alone?"

"I'm not alone," the girl said, giggling. "You're here."

"Yeah, but… what are you doing here?"

The girl smiled up to him at that. Sitting down on the grass and crossing her legs, she grabbed her small feet with her hands, smiling sheepishly. "Auntie Kakyuu said you need help to get back home."

He blinked at the answer, surprised out of his mind. This girl knew his Princess? How? And why was she calling her 'auntie'? Kakyuu didn't have any siblings. And what did she mean…

"Home?" he asked, confused.

"Where mommy is!" she exclaimed, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "And me," she then added. "But I'm still in her belly."

"I see," he didn't have a clue of what she was talking about.

"She's sad," the girl announced, pouting cutely and frowning. "She tries to hide it, but I can tell."

For some reason, the girl's words made him uncomfortable. As if he was supposed to know this, yet for some reason, he didn't remember knowing.

"Why is she sad?"

"'Cause she misses you," the girl said, again, as if it was the most obvious answer. "Don't you miss her too?" she asked, in that sweet, melodious, innocent, excited tone only a child could have.

"I…" he frowned, not sure of how to answer to that.

A pang of guilt assaulted him then. He knew he wasn't exactly seeing the bigger picture, and he was kind of lost. He felt lost, even if he knew these woods like the back of his hand. And he felt as if there was something missing, deep within him.

"Yes."

The word just slipped through his lips without him even realizing. And as he heard himself saying it, he knew he meant it.

He missed her. Even if he didn't know, or didn't remember knowing who this kid's mother was. He just knew, deep within his heart, he missed her.

The smile that came to the girl's sweet, soft features was brilliant. The kind of big, sweet, happy smile that could make anyone's heart melt at sight. "Then kiss it and make it all better!" she exclaimed, raising her hands up in the air excitedly.

He chuckled at the girl's enthusiasm and her overall cuteness. "Kiss it?"

"Yeah!" she exclaimed, nodding her head repeatedly. "Like, when it hurts," she said, taking his hand in hers and rubbing it gently, "you kiss it and make it better," she explained, to then kiss the back of his hand softly.

He tried hard not to chuckle again, for it was obvious she was being serious. But, man, this kid was cute.

"I should try that, then," he said, nodding his head and putting on a serious frown. "So, what's your name?" he then asked, curiously.

She tilted her head to a side then. Her short, soft black hair barely reaching her shoulder as she did so, and the cutest of frowns came to her young features. "I'm not supposed to tell," she said, in a low, slow voice, lowering her gaze. "Auntie Kakyuu says you'll know after I'm out of mommy's belly."

There was that auntie thing again. And what did she mean, he will know?

"Is it true?" the girl asked. "Will you know my name then?"

She looked so adorable right now. With her eyes big and rounded, looking up at him filled with hope and curiosity as an anxious smile tugged at the corner of her lips. For reasons he wasn't sure he understood correctly, this little girl was perfectly able to melt his heart, right on the spot.

"I will," he heard himself saying. And for some strange reason, he knew, without a doubt in his heart, that he was telling her the truth.

A soft, childishly melodious set of giggles filled the air then. Eyes big and shinning, and a big, cheeky smile dancing on her lips. And then she jumped up, getting off the grass and throwing herself at him.

He caught her right on before she could throw them both down, and the girl encircled her little arms around his neck, holding him close. And right then, with this girl in his arms, he suddenly felt as if he had just come home.

The pieces of the puzzle fit, and everything the girl said made sense now. Or at least parts of it.

Whose energy was this that he could feel within her? His own, mixed with someone else's…

She was his daughter. He was sure of that.

In the middle of the void he had been trapped on for so long now, in the middle of the darkness that held him prisoner, she was his little light of hope. And he held her close, treasuring the little frame in his arms with all his heart. Breathing her in, he wondered when would he be able to see her, to really see her, and if she was real at all, or if this was just a really strange dream.

"I love you, daddy," came the girl's voice, soft, melodic, and a bit hoarse, and filled with love and innocence.

His grip around the girl tightened just a little, as he took a deep breath. And once more, the words just left his lips, but again, he knew he meant them. "I love you too, baby."

And that, was all that mattered.

.-.

The first thing his mind registered was the now familiar feeling of waking up knowing he had just dreamt of something, but not remembering what. Like many times before, it felt as if someone had come to his dreams, visiting him in his slumber, and now that he was awake, he couldn't remember.

And he wanted to remember. Something deep inside him told him it was important.

But as the sleep fog left his mind, he noticed something else. Or rather, a serious of little details his mind was just starting to register. Like the fact that he was still dressed, and there was a blanket half covering him up to his stomach. Or that subtle, soft, yet positively intoxicating scent all around, engulfing him, and the warm body wrapped around his.

Blue eyes snapped opened.

There was a blonde head resting on his chest. One slender arm around him, keeping him close, and two long legs tangled with his.

A million things jumped into his mind then. The first one being, this is most definitively _not_ taking things slow.

She stirred in her sleep, rubbing her face against his chest and holding him tighter for a moment, before she relaxed again, letting out a content, sleepy sigh. Immediately, he took out the arm he only now realized he was holding around her shoulders, suddenly panicking.

After last night, after that almost kiss, he didn't know how she would react to waking up with him holding her like this. Hell, he didn't know how to react himself. What was he supposed to say? Sorry I fell asleep and ended up hugging you?

Well, at least he wasn't spooning her…

He groaned inwardly the moment the thought crossed his mind. His heart was pumping fast inside his ribcage, and just as he wondered if she could hear it, she stirred again, lazily stretching her legs and freeing his.

And then, in the blink of an eye, her head was off his chest.

Wide green eyes were now staring at him, with her cheeks burning red as she just laid there, on her stomach and half over him, with one arm still over his chest. Black, incredibly long eyelashes moving rapidly as she blinked repeatedly.

"Sorry!" she exclaimed, getting off him and sitting up on the bed. The covers falling all over her frame.

"It's ok," he said, moving to sit up against the headboard. "I… I guess I fell asleep."

She opened her mouth as if to say something, but then she frowned. One hand flying to her lips and a muffled whine escaping her.

He frowned too. "You alright?" he asked, worriedly.

"Crap!" was all she said, before she jumped off the bed and, opening the bedroom door, she ran down the hallway.

He blinked, surprised. His still half asleep, completely affected after waking up like that mind was taking a bit longer than usual to register things. Like the fact that he was sitting up on the bed, staring at the empty spot the blonde had just left, as the sounds of the house reached him from the now opened door.

He guessed everyone was up already. Deciding to go and check if the racer was alright, guessing she was probably busy emptying her stomach on the toilet but still feeling he should at least check on her, he got off the bed himself, walking down the hallway and taking a peek into the bathroom.

With the toothbrush hanging from her mouth, a blue flannel robe falling opened from her shoulders and showing the white and blue striped flannel pajamas she was still wearing, Michiru seemed amused as she watched the blonde now curled next to the toilet.

"You know," she started to say, taking the toothbrush off her mouth, "if I didn't know any better, I would think you had a little bit too much fun last night," she teased, giggling when green eyes narrowed at her. "Lucky for you, I _do_ know better."

"Good morning!" came Setsuna's voice right behind him.

Handing a new toothbrush, still in its blister pack to him, the olive skinned woman walked into the now crowdy bathroom, carrying a robe in her hands. She walked up to the blonde sitting on the cold tile floor and put the robe over her shoulders, to then turn back around and walk out, saying something about breakfast just about to be ready.

Seiya just blinked. Opening and closing his mouth, he frowned, starring at the toothbrush in his hands.

"Don't," Michiru said, making him look up at her as the violinist was now working with her hair, tying it up in a bun with a hair stick. "Whatever you do, _never_ question Setsuna," she advised.

"Ok…" he mumbled, still frowning.

"All yours!" the violinist announced, stepping out of the bathroom.

He blinked, looking down at the toothbrush before shaking his shoulders. He turned back around, looking at the blonde still sitting on the floor; forehead resting against the toilet's seat.

"You ok?" he asked, knowing it was a rather stupid question on his part.

She groaned. "I can't wait for this to be over," she stated, lifting her face up and frowning.

"It's only supposed to last after the fourth month, right?" he said, as he took the empty glass and filled it with water, offering it to her.

"I don't know. I don't care," she said, accepting the glass. "I just want it to be over," she said, before taking a sip.

She stood up then, rearranging her messy hair with her hand and leaving the glass on its previous spot next to the sink. Without realizing, or maybe just not caring at all, she stretched herself then, raising both hands up and above her head and making the hem of the sleeping tee she was wearing go up, letting him see the electric blue sleek cheeky panties she was wearing under it. And a nice view of her bottom as well as she walked past him, not to mention her perfect, endless legs, right before she put on the robe Setsuna had brought, preventing him from actually staring.

It was morning, for Christ's sake! Didn't she know it was too early for her to do that, making his still sleepy mind run off on him?

Did she even know what she did to him?

"Don't take too long," she said. "Breakfast must be ready," and with that, she simply left the bathroom.

Obviously, she had no idea…

He turned to the mirror the moment the door closed, looking into his own reflexion. Taking a deep breath, he forced all images of a glorious bottom off his head, opening the blister and taking the toothbrush out. It had been given to him, he might as well use it.

As he clean his teeth, a frown came to his mind, remembering his dream. Or rather, remembering the by now familiar feeling of a dream. Just like any other morning ever since he woke up on that hospital bed, he knew he had just dreamed of someone. Who, he didn't know, but there was definitively someone coming to his dreams, and he couldn't help but wonder if it was just his imagination, or if it was a part of his memories wanting to arise. But what intrigued him the most was not the fact that he couldn't remember his dream at all other than just vague feelings. What surprised him was that, this particular morning, he was rested.

He really hadn't lied to the racer when he said she was the one holding the key to all his questions, to all his troubles. Because, for the first time in over a month, there had been no waking up in the middle of the night to then find himself unable to fall back asleep.

With her in his arms, he had slept like a baby.

.-.

Setsuna was making tea, entertaining herself while she waited for the water to boil with some magazine, turning the pages only half interested in her reading. And the tall blonde knew the olive skinned woman wouldn't leave that spot, right over the counter, next to the stove until everyone in the house would have had their breakfast; Setsuna had a habit on making absolutely sure everyone ate their breakfast, no matter what.

Michiru was quietly eating her toast with butter and peach jam, looking at it every time she took a bite -Haruka had always found that habit of hers both curious and funny, and quite cute-, as she sat on a chair right across from the blonde; both feet on the chair as she hugged her legs.

Hotaru had yet to make an appearance. And considering the teenager went out partying the night before with her friends from school, Haruka guessed her daughter wouldn't be showing up anytime soon. But it was alright; she could get some quality time with the little firefly some other time. Preferably, when the teenager wouldn't have the pillow still stuck to her face, and she herself wouldn't be putting up a fight with her own stomach, trying to eat a simple apple as breakfast and convincing her stomach to leave it there.

Kalina was sitting right next to her. Big blue eyes would shift from her to the violinist, and then just to the table, as the dog hoped to get something -anything, really-, patiently waiting while wagging her tale. Michiru would occasionally give her a piece of toast, and the blonde would share small pieces of her apple too, but that was all the silver dog was getting.

"Um… morning," came a soft, low, shy voice, making them all turn to the door, as one embarrassed looking Ami walked in; her short blue hair slightly disheveled, and still looking as if she had the pillow on her face.

"Good morning," Setsuna greeted, smiling up to her. "I trust you slept well?"

"Yes, thank you," Ami said, nodding her head as she accepted the chair Michiru offered for her to take. "And thank you so much for letting me stay," she soon added, blushing now. "I didn't mean to fall asleep like that…"

"Don't worry," Michiru was fast to say, waving her hand and dismissing the comment. "It was no problem at all."

"Please don't tell me you let her sleep on that couch," she put in, arching an eyebrow towards her friends and former housemates, remembering that was the spot she had seen Ami last.

"Of course not," Setsuna said, shaking her head. "We had Seiya taking her up to Hotaru's room."

She blinked at that, frowning. "And where is Hotaru sleeping?" she asked, remembering she hadn't seen the teenager on the aforementioned couch.

The possibility of the girl not coming home was something the blonde refused to take under consideration. No matter how old Hotaru would get, Haruka was sure she would always see her as her little firefly. And little fireflies did not spend the entire night out.

"Couch," came, to Haruka's relief, Hotaru's voice, as the girl walked in, stretching herself and yawning, to the promptly dump herself on a chair around the table.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," Ami began, "I didn't mean to …"

"It's ok," Hotaru said, shaking her shoulder. "I came home pretty late, anyway, and I can make up for the lost pillow time after breakfast," she joked. "I had a blanket and Kalina to keep me warm."

She blinked at that, only now realizing her dog hadn't been there when she woke up that morning. She just hoped her dog hadn't suddenly decided to go on a recon mission in the middle of the night; she knew she would never hear the end of it if she did.

"That's a dangerous thing to say," Michiru pointed out, smiling when magenta eyes blinked at their daughter.

Hotaru giggled, smiling innocently up to the Guardian of Time. "But she makes such a cute feet warmer!" the teenager said, turning to look at the blonde now. "Can I keep her for a while? Just until winter is over?"

"Get your own dog," she answered, as she went to pet her dog, cuddling Kalina's face in her hands and guiding it to her knees in a rather protective, possessive gesture.

"Don't even think about it," was Setsuna's warning, before the teenager could say anything at all.

"There is a reason why your papa never got a dog until she moved out of here," Michiru put in, smiling amusedly to their daughter while pointing with her head towards the olive skinned woman.

She smiled to that, smugly. "He got me one," she said, pointing at the singer as he just walked into the kitchen.

Ponytail re-made after being messed with the pillow, he had obviously tried to compose his wrinkled clothes -she felt a bit guilty over that- as best he could. His midnight blues blinked at her, obviously confused, and she was barely able to keep the light, joking mood, blushing lightly as the memory of waking up cuddle next him, shamelessly using him as her pillow jumped into her head.

She really hadn't expected that to happen when she asked him to stay. She hadn't even fully expected him to even agree to her request in the first place. But he had, and he had obviously fallen asleep. And it hadn't exactly been her fault, waking up hugging him like that; she was used to sharing the bed with the man, and she would always seek for him during the night whenever he was not the one holding her, resting his head in either her stomach or her chest, curling himself around her legs, or hugging her from behind, spooning her, with his face against her neck.

They were used to it. Their bodies were used to sleeping together, and the guy probably knew that. But knowing it didn't necessary made it any less awkward or uncomfortable, and along with that almost kiss just last night, she was suddenly afraid of taking steps backwards instead of forward.

Things had been doing so well lately, too. Ever since that first night he spent over on the guest room, he would always come and visit. Sometimes early in the morning, and they would talk and laugh over breakfast. And he would ask all kinds of questions; sometimes about them, sometimes about her, others, just random things. Other times, he came over at night, always making sure not to be too late, and they would have dinner together.

He had made it a point not staying until late, and she had noticed that. But she figured he was probably trying to do what he thought was right, giving himself -and them?- the time to take things slowly, not invading her space and privacy. Of course, he seemed to be completely oblivious to the fact that she wanted him to invade her space and privacy; she wanted him with her. It really was as simple as that.

She chuckled, shaking her shoulder and trying to keep the light mood, taking a sip from her green tea. The guy probably just needed some time. Rationally, she understood what an awkward position he was in, and she could see why he was taking things slowly. But again, knowing something didn't necessary make it any easier to accept, and she just missed him so much…

"Just ignore her," Setsuna advised him, pointing at a chair for him to take -right next to the blonde; subtlety was not in today's menu, obviously- while taking out a cup and offering him some freshly made coffee.

"Oh, please," Michiru said, rolling her blue eyes. "Ever since I've met you, you've always wanted a dog," she pointed out, as she turned to look at their daughter. "But you know, missions, duty, work, tours… Setsuna forbidding any pets in the house…" she trailed off, waving her hand around.

"Oh, I see," Seiya said, chuckling lightly and frowning as he looked in Setsuna's direction for a moment before looking at everyone gathered around the table -everyone _but_ her, the blonde noticed. "Am I in trouble because of this little lady here?" he asked, petting Kalina's head, making one long silver tail wag in excitement and happiness at the gesture.

"No," she answered. "Setsuna's just being oversensitive again."

"I took her with me," Hotaru was fast to say, probably noticing magenta eyes narrowing at the blonde. "I know how much she likes to sleep under coffee tables, and I figured she could keep me company," she stated. "Since, you know, you seemed to have all the company you needed," she stated, giving her a teasing smile that did not go unnoticed by neither her nor the singer.

Curious blue eyes blinked up at the both of them, as Ami seemed confused for a couple of seconds until realization drawn on her, and she smiled. Michiru and Setsuna, on the other hand, just smiled knowingly at them -though the blonde could swore there was quite the amount of teasing dancing in their eyes-, while Hotaru just giggled.

She didn't even need to look to know Seiya was probably turning into a tomato right about now. She could feel the red coming to her cheeks as well, and she cleared her throat in a vain attempt to avoid making any comment about the subject Hotaru had oh so innocently brought up.

"Did you sleep well?" was, of course, Setsuna's question.

.-.

Though it could be interpreted as the olive skinned woman being nice and polite, genuinely asking if he had rested well, he knew better than to take it as just that. Because there was an overly sweet tone to her words and that small, knowing smile of hers she was barely keeping from curving her lips. He wasn't sure if the teasing lingering in her question was directed to him, or to the blonde woman sitting next to him. Probably to both, but there was a generous amount of teasing dancing in her magenta eyes as she casually took a sip from her tea.

The woman had handed him a new toothbrush just a few minutes ago. Who had extra toothbrushes in the house? He didn't ponder much on that, anyway. He decided to follow Michiru's advise on that one, and just accepted the fact that Setsuna simply knew things. Or at the very least, she expected certain things to just happen…

Like him falling asleep when he hadn't planned to, only to wake perfectly rested and hugging the one woman he couldn't figure out his feelings for.

Of course, he wasn't planning on telling all these to the Guardian of Time. She probably already knew, anyway, and there was just no way he would so openly discuss such private matters with everyone sitting on the table, looking up at him like that. So he just went for the easy way out, playing fool and strictly answering the question, ignoring the implicit disguised question dancing in there.

"Yes, thank you," he answered, slightly nodding his head. "I would have preferred not having to listen to your neighbor singing the Macarena, but, you know…" he joked, making the blonde woman beside him laughed, remembering the little episode, as some random guy had started singing that right after he had made himself comfortable in the bed with her. "Other than that…"

"What?" Hotaru asked, frowning curiously in between giggles.

"Well, you can't have it all, can you?" Michiru said, smiling as well.

"Guess not," he agreed, raising both eyebrows for emphasis.

But as the words left his mouth and he heard himself saying them, he frowned inwardly.

Discreetly, from the corner of his eye, he watched the woman sitting beside him as he drank from his coffee. Her hair was slightly mess, her bangs kept on insisting on falling over her green eyes as she kept on tossing them aside either with her hand or with a shake of her head. Still wearing her sleeping shirt and the robe Setsuna had given her earlier, she had thrown on some dark gray fleece trousers, and put on sleepers to keep her feet warm. And she sat there, slowly drinking her tea and occasionally giving Kalina a small piece from her apple, chuckling lightly every time she did so and the dog would devour the offered piece.

He watched her, and the weirdest, strangest of feelings invaded him, filling his chest with warmth and something else. And he wondered, why couldn't he have it all? Did he want it all?

Blue eyes adverted to one tall blonde woman once more.

And most importantly, did he want her?


	32. Chapter 31

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. So please don't steal it!

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><p>Hey stranger, when may I call you my own?<br>I know I don't know you, but there's somewhere I've seen you before.  
>Whatever your name is, whatever you do<br>there's nothing between us I'm willing to lose.

Just call me if ever our paths may collide.  
>I want you to call me under these darkening skies.<br>Whoever you love, whoever you kiss,  
>the ones in between us I'm willing to miss.<p>

Now I'm drifting out over deep oceans  
>and the tide won't take me back in.<br>and these desperate nights I'll call you again and again.

There's comfort, comfort in things we believe  
>other than danger, wanting the things I can't see.<br>Wherever you live, wherever you walk,  
>this distance between us I'm willing to cross.<p>

Now I'm drifting out over deep oceans  
>and the tide won't take me back in.<br>and these desperate nights I'll call you again and again.

Hey stranger, when may I call you my own?  
>I know I don't know you, but there's somewhere I've seen you before.<p>

**(Between us - Peter Bradley Adams)**

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><p><strong>31<strong>

He took the jacket out and studied it, unsure.

He was not the type to worry too much about how he looked. Not exactly humble, he was not completely full of himself either. He looked good and he knew it, and as long as whatever he was wearing didn't make him look ridiculous, he really didn't care much about clothes. Except maybe on certain occasions when he knew he had to dress himself up and look good.

This was one of those times. He didn't want to be underdressed, but he didn't want to overdo it either. And he had absolutely no idea of what the right kind of dressing code for such events was. He hadn't even thought about it at all until Haruka brought it up, remembering him there was a closet filled with clothes -his clothes-, and how he should go through it to find something to wear for the show.

The blonde opened a drawer, humming a few seconds, and hovering her index finger over the neatly folded ties. She picked a black one out, to then take a white shirt, handing the items out to him.

He frowned. "Really?" he asked, unsure. "With this jacket?" he asked, raising the jacket he still had in his hand.

"It's Dior," she pointed out. "You can never go wrong with Dior."

"I know, but…" he trailed off, inspecting the jacket again.

Yes, it was a great wool jacket. Black, with silver zippers that added a certain biker air to it. But he wasn't sure that kind of jacket was the right thing to go for. He had been thinking more along the lines of a tailored suit and a tie, and this jacket was a bit too casual.

"You're a music star," she said, as if reading his mind. "You can afford to play it cool and play the music God part while looking great," she pointed out. "With this jacket," she added, shoving said item up to his chest, insistently.

He chuckled. "Ok…" he mumbled. "If you say so…"

"I do," she said, nodding her head. "Now you just need to add jeans, a leather belt, and matching leather shoes to go with that," she said, turning back around and inspecting the section of the walk-in closet where the shoes were placed in rows. "Or maybe boots…" she added, more to herself than to him, as she rested her chin on her hand, humming.

Forgetting the fact that it felt completely weird to have her advising him -or rather, telling him- what to wear to a show, he was starting to feel really guilty by now.

He had come here about two hours ago. And upon finding her already wearing her sleeping shirt, some training pants and a cardigan over it to keep herself warm, he knew he had come at a bad time. But she didn't seem to mind much, telling him he was only stopping her from a date in front of the TV, watching a movie she could catch any other time. Instead of letting him go, as he had intended to, she insisted for him to come in and stay for dinner.

Dinner led to talk, talk led to tea after dinner, and somehow the subject of his upcoming show came up. And that was when she asked if he already knew what he was going to wear. Which he didn't. And so, here they were now, standing in the walk-in closet, with the blonde going through his clothes for him, and him still keeping her from going to bed and rest.

It was getting late, and he really didn't want to bother her. He felt bad enough he had ruined her evening plans of doing nothing and just relaxing for a change, even if she didn't seem to mind much.

That seemed to be quite the inner battle with himself lately. Whenever he came to visit, a part of him felt as if he was either interrupting something, or just bothering her with his visits and wanting to talk. But another part of him insisted on pointing out to him she probably didn't mind having him around. Quite possibly, that was the one thing she wanted, and that part of him that insisted on coming here and spend as much time as he could with the tall woman felt happy to oblige.

And he really enjoyed his time with her. She was so easy to talk to. About anything, really. She would just sit and listen to whatever it was he had to say, about any given subject. And she would always add her own input, giving her either her opinion or patiently and willingly answering his questions.

The truth was, he felt more lost now than ever before. Even right after finding out about the history between them and the baby, he hadn't feel this lost and confused. Because, sometimes, being around her just felt so right, so natural. As if even though his head didn't remember a thing, the rest of him did. He could be himself, knowing she wouldn't judge him, and, most importantly, she wouldn't turn her back on him, turning him down.

And when she was not around, he missed her. He missed hearing her voice, he missed the sound of her laugh and her husky chuckles; her witty remarks and her incredibly green eyes. He missed being with her.

But other times… Well, other times, he really didn't know what he felt. And it was on those moments when he wondered if whatever he felt was real, or if it was just a part of him wanting to buy the tale just so that he wouldn't hurt her.

Because he really didn't want to hurt her.

He knew she loved him. Even if she never said a word, even if she would never take one step forward. He could see it in her eyes. And, sometimes, it was so easy to read her, to see right through her, it was scary, to say the least.

Never before had he been this confused about his own feelings. He was used to being honest with himself, with what his heart cried out and craved for. But right now, and for more than just a couple of days now, he simply wasn't sure. He didn't know if he was unconsciously trying to fool himself, or if he was starting to develop feelings for the tall, wild, always proud, -and, yes, beautiful- blonde woman.

He was such a walking mess these days. And if everything wasn't messed up enough already, to top it off, he was still dreaming of Kakyuu. He could never really recall his dreams, what they were about or what she would say to him, but he knew it was her. He could recognize her presence, her scent. And he could even feel her, outside dreamland and in the real world, making him feel as if she was trying to reach him, for some reason. As if she was trying to tell him something. Like that one night, when he had felt her around, almost as if guiding him right before he reached the house he used to share with one car racer.

He missed her. And he wished she could be there with him, really be there, not just a lingering feeling in the air, but physically there with him. His Princess had always had such a way to easy his turmoil with gentle words, to offer care and encouragement. And Seiya knew he would give anything to be able to talk to her right now. To know what she thought of him and of the life he led here on earth. How would she feel about it? About him following dreams that had little to nothing to do with duty and destiny as Senshi? Living a life that was so different from what it was like back home, in Kinmoku.

And then, of course, there were the other dreams. The ones where Kakyuu was not around, but someone else would take her place and visit him. Always waking up with the feeling there was something important he was forgetting.

It really felt as if he was losing his mind at times. And he just didn't know what was real anymore.

And then, of course, there was the show to worry about. Sure, he had learned the songs. He knew the lyrics and all his cues, and he was confident enough to know he would be able to stand there and sing, selling the story as best he could. And it was not the first time he would be standing on a stage, singing about love and feelings he wasn't completely familiar with. But it was the first time, as far as he could remember, that he would do that alone.

In two days, he would be standing up on a stage all by himself, without his brothers there with him. And though he knew and trusted his musicians, it just wasn't quite the same. And, well, he was a bit edgy about that.

"Sound check is tomorrow, right?" Haruka's voice forced him out of his own thoughts.

He shook his head, blinking a few times. "Yeah," he said, scratching the back of his neck as the blonde took the jacket off his hands, carefully placing it on a carrier.

"Ok, then," she said, now handing him the carrier. "All set," she said, tapping his shoulder and smiling softly. "You'd be great, you'll see."

"Yeah," he mumbled, unsure. But then an idea came to his mind, and he blinked, looking up into green eyes. "Would you come with me?" he suddenly asked.

.-.

She blinked, surprised at the request. That by now familiar stab in her heart came again, and she blinked again, trying to fight it back.

She was supposed to go with him. That had been the plan; to go together and spend the night at the apartment, with their bags all made up and ready for them to go on a well deserved -though short- vacation.

They had planned it all out months ago. A romantic getaway, just the two of them, getting lost in a small village, far away from everything and from everyone for just a few days.

She had canceled their plans, seeing as he was not going to get his memory back, and going on that trip with him right now would be too weird. Locking herself up in a cabin in the middle of nowhere with him, with no TV, no phone, and not much to do was probably a really bad idea. And a very awkward one.

"I know it's very short notice," he was fast to add the second she went silent. "And you'd probably just get bored…"

"No, it's not that…" she said, shaking her head.

"But I figured, it'd look strange if you're not there, right?" he reasoned.

He had a point there.

Yes, the press and the media would think her absence beside him strange. And logically, the last thing neither of them needed right now was the press going mad on them, spreading all kind of rumors and coming up with conjectures some journalists were so fond of.

It was a perfectly valid point. But it didn't make his words hurt any less.

"And, I don't know," he continued, as he massaged the back of his neck in a rather embarrassed way. "It'd be nice, you know? Having someone there for me," he said. "I know there'd be fans and a lot of people and all, but… it'd be nice to have someone out there who actually cares about me, for real."

Her heart stopped dead in her chest, and green eyes blinked, looking into his midnight blues. Her cheeks felt warm suddenly, and she opened and closed her mouth a few times, but no sound came out, as only one thought invaded her mind.

He wanted her there with him. For him.

"I'm sure I can get you an invitation," he offered, gifting her with that smile of his, sided, charming, and just a little bit shy.

"N-no, I…" she mumbled, shaking her head and blinking. "I already have… one…"

"Really? Oh," he said, as his incredibly blue eyes got just a little wider. "Well, that's… that's great!" he exclaimed. "And… obvious…" he added, chuckling embarrassedly. "So, would you come?" he asked, in what she could only read as a hopeful tone to his voice.

"I…"

"I can pick you up, and I promise I'll get you back as early as possible," he promised. "You know, so you don't get tired or anything…"

She rolled her eyes at that. "For the last time, Seiya, I'm pregnant, not dying," she groaned. "I'm sure going to a charity show and sitting around for a few hours won't kill me."

"So is that a yes?" he asked, smiling cheekily now. And a bit cocky, too. "I'm sure you can find something to wear and look good yourself," he teased. "You know, since I'll be looking like a music God and all."

Was he mocking her?

Green eyes narrowed at him and she punched him in the chest. And he just laughed at her, obviously amused.

She chucked despite herself, too. "You're so full of yourself."

"Come on," he said, calming himself down. "I'm sure the baby would love to hear daddy singing, don't you think?"

"Right," she said, rolling her eyes.

"What? You don't think it can hear and feel everything?" he asked, in such a tone that let her know he was actually being serious about this. "I mean, if I can feel it, I'm sure it works both ways…"

That surprised her, and she blinked, raising a palm up in the air and shutting him up. "Wait, what?" she asked. "You can feel the baby?"

"Yeah," he said, as if it was the most obvious thing. "Can't you?"

"No," she answered, eyes wide and big. And then she frowned. "Is it an alien thing?"

"Not that I know of…" he answered, frowning too as he scratched the back of his neck. "I thought it was more of a Senshi thing… You know how we're able to sense energy and all…" he tried to explain, even if he wasn't making any sense to the blonde right now. "And yours is kind of different. At first I didn't know what it was or why it felt different, but then, you know…"

She blinked, surprised out of her mind.

Sure, Ami had said something about her energy levels being under some sort of revolution because of the baby. Which didn't seem that odd, considering who the baby's parents were; the idea of the baby having some special energy or power some point in the future was plausible. And even if it didn't, and again, because of who the parents were, this baby was unique.

She had always thought life, simple molecules growing and turning into human beings as a miracle. No matter what science tried to explain, it was simply amazing. And her baby was that, and more, and she had known that the second she found out she was pregnant.

But she had no idea Seiya could sense that change in her, let alone actually feel the baby…

And then she remembered something, and she frowned. "Is that what you were doing?" she asked, curiously. "That day, at the hospital," she provided, when blue eyes just looked at her. "You were… feeling the baby?"

"Um, yeah," he answered. "I could feel this… pull… I still can," he tried to explain. "And I could feel something familiar to it, so… you know… I wanted to test the theory."

She blinked again, opening and closing her mouth a few times, but unable to find any words. She was simply amazed.

And jealous. She wished she could feel her baby the way he did.

"I thought you knew," he was saying. "I mean, there's this sort of shield around it, and I thought… you made me fly across the room, so I assumed…"

"I have no idea how I did that," she said, in all honesty. "Sorry, by the way."

He chuckled. "It's ok," he said, shaking his shoulder. "Maybe you're doing it in a subconscious level or something."

"Can you show me?" she asked, both curious and anxious.

"Yeah, sure," he answered, again scratching the back of his neck. "I can try, I guess. Just promise there would be no flying across the room on my part, 'cause that kinda hurt."

"I'm sorry, I…"

"It's ok, I was just kidding," he interrupted her, shaking his shoulder. "Alright!" he then exclaimed, rubbing his hands together and looking all around. "Maybe you should lay down for this," he suggested.

"Yeah, ok," she agreed, as she made her way out of the walk-in closet and into the bedroom.

He followed right after her, and the blonde laid herself in the middle of the bed, making herself comfortable. Crossing her legs over the ankles, she rested her head over the pillows, eagerly and curiously looking up at the singer as he sat down right next to her, scratching his head for a moment before rubbing his hands together.

"Alright, ready?"

"Yeah," she answered, smiling and biting on her lower lip.

"Ok," he said, nodding his head as he reached out. But then he stopped in mid air. "May I?" he asked, pointing at her sleeping shirt.

She nodded her head, smiling as she found the way he lifted her sleeping shirt, gently and carefully rolling it over her stomach with shy movements, cute. And she just laid there, hands resting over her chest and looking up at him, until he took her hand in his, placing it over her stomach, right over the slightly swollen spot in her lower belly.

"Alright, just… try to relax and uh… it might be kind of invasive," he said, "but just… try not to fight me, ok?"

She frowned lightly, not sure she fully understood what he was trying to explained. "Yeah, ok," she said all the same, nodding her head.

He nodded his head then, placing his hand over hers. A small, concentrated frown coming to his features as he did… whatever it was he was doing. And green eyes just looked up at him. A small, sided, kind of proud, all the way amazed smile came to Seiya's lips as a warm energy spread out of his hand and right into her belly.

At first she didn't feel anything. And then…

The warmth turned into a tingling little felling. And something else. Something soft, and small, and faint, with a clear hint of her own energy gently tucking it in, keeping it safe.

A small, amazed smile found its way to her own lips as she closed her eyes, concentrating on that growing energy she could now feel, deep inside her. Nurturing from her, and then happily coming to meet Seiya's, as if recognizing him and welcoming his gentle touch.

"Amazing…" he whispered, in complete awe.

She opened her eyes then, looking up at him for a moment, before looking down on herself. Her free hand went to her stomach as well; the tip of her fingers gently caressing the spot where she knew her baby was, wondering if Seiya was right, if the baby could feel them as well. Wondering if it knew how much she loved it.

"It's a strong one," Seiya said, still amazed, and with such a proud tone to his softly whispered words, as he reached out his free hand and gently caressed her forehead, only now making her realize her birth mark was shining proudly in there. "Just like mommy."

Something in the way he said that, and in the way he was now smiling down to her made her blush. And she froze to her spot, suddenly afraid to move at all, to even blink, as she just looked up into soft midnight blue eyes. And he was looking back at her in such a way…

His hand was still over her stomach, that warm, loving feeling faded away, folding back inside her as he moved his hand. Slowly, his hand made it to her hips; his thumb gently, almost shyly caressing her skin.

God, she missed him. So much…

And she needed him. She needed him to hold her, to kiss her, to touch her… to love her…

And when she felt his hand slowly moving up, palm down, caressing her all the way up to her waist, slightly -and yes, sensually- pressing on her skin, she gulped. Her breath got caught in her throat as she looked up into suddenly darker blue eyes.

She knew that touch. And she knew that light dancing in his eyes.

Several things came to her mind then.

One, he had never been with a woman before, let alone touch one. Not him. Because this was teenage Seiya, the one from eight years ago; the one that would have never looked at her the way he was looking at her now. The one that had never seen her naked, nor touched her, nor kissed her -not willingly, at least…-; the one that didn't remember her at all.

But that light, that lust was now dancing in blue orbs, consuming her. And as the alarms inside her head turned on, screaming at her to stop, listing all the reasons why this was so wrong, she simply didn't care anymore.

She just needed him, so much…

Reaching up a hand and resting it over his chest, she tilted her face up. Green eyes gazing into blue ones, hesitating for just a moment, before the distance between their faces disappeared.


	33. Chapter 32

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. So please don't steal it!

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><p>I am at ease in the arms of a woman.<br>Although now, most of my days I spend alone.  
>A thousand miles from the place I was born.<br>But when she wakes me, she takes me back home.

Now, most days, I spend like a child  
>who's afraid of ghosts in my mind.<br>I know there ain't nothing out there.  
>I'm still afraid to turn on the lights.<p>

I am at ease in the arms of a woman.  
>Although now, most of my days I spend alone.<br>A thousand miles from the place I was born.  
>But when she wakes me, she takes me back home.<p>

**(Arms of a woman - Amos Lee)**

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><p><strong>32<strong>

He felt her lips, warm, soft, welcoming, and all and any rational thought just left him.

He wanted this. He wanted _her_.

And he was tired of analyzing everything, of questioning himself only to get to nowhere. And, damn it, this felt so good, so right.

He didn't want to deny it anymore. He didn't want to fight it, and so he kissed her right back. Deepening the kiss the moment he felt her parting her lips, caressing her tongue with his and losing himself to her, to how wonderful it felt to kiss her like this.

His hand took a life of its own, traveling up her soft, warm skin, as he laid himself down on the bed with her. He felt the strong muscles of her stomach contracting and trembling under his touch, and she gasped softly into the kiss the moment his fingers graced her breast.

_(Edited! to read, go to blog)_

Shaking in the aftermath, he collapsed on top of her. Drained, he rested his head on her chest, listening to her thundering heart and letting out a sigh as she moved her hands, hugging him.

With her heartbeat acting as the perfect lullaby, still inside her, the last thing he registered before sleep claimed him were her hands in his hair, softly and tiredly cradling him in gentle caress.

.-.

He walked down the corridors, wondering why there was no one around. Nothing but the sound of his own feet against the marble floor welcomed him; not even the usual far off murmur of heals on the corridors, of voices and birds singing outside reached his ears. There was no one there. Not even the posting guards, and he frowned, somewhere in between worried and confused.

Where was everyone?

He found her sitting on a bench in the gardens. Face tilted up and eyes closed, the sun shone in her porcelain like skin as the gentle breeze made her ever red hair dance around her.

"Princess," he said, kneeling in front of her.

"Seiya," she called out to him, extending a hand out for him to take and then signaling for him to sit beside her.

He did, frowning, not fully understanding the sad smile decorating her lips.

"You're still here."

He blinked, noticing the sad tone to her words. She sounded almost disappointed, and he frowned.

"You shouldn't be here," she said, looking straight into his deep blue eyes as she took both his hands in hers. "If you stay any longer, you won't be able to go back," she said, in an urgent tone that didn't escape him, only to confuse him more.

"Go back? Wha…" he trailed off, frowning. "Princess, what are you talking about? Go back where?"

"Home. Where you belong."

"I belong here with you."

"No, you don't," she said, shaking her head as she cupped his cheek. That sad smile coming to her lips again. "Not anymore. We no longer belong to the same world, and you shouldn't be here."

"Wha…"

"You're not supposed to be here," she said, interrupting him before he could say anything at all. "I don't know how you got here at all, but you need to go back now."

"Kakyuu, I… I don't understand, I…"

"You've always been such a loyal friend, and I'm so happy I've met you," she said, as tears suddenly came to her eyes, and she blinked them away. "And I will always be with you, but you need to go now. Go back to her."

His heart jumped and shrunk, all at once, and he blinked. Something inside him urged him to do as he was being told, as another part of him knew, if he left now, he would never see his Princess again.

A flash of green and gold suddenly crossed his mind's eyes, and a scent reached his nostrils, invading him. There was a mix of vanilla and gardenia, and something else, and it felt so familiar, somehow. It made his heart ache, and the sudden certainty that he missed that scent invaded him.

This has happened before. The elusive memory of a woman, haunting him. And all he could remember was being unable to remember her, who she was, yet somehow knowing, deep inside him, she was important. She mattered.

Even the faint memory of green and gold and gardenia was enough to make him feel complete.

"I know you want to," Kakyuu said, smiling knowingly. "And I know how much she means to you."

A bright light suddenly appeared in front of him, out of nowhere. It blinded him for a moment, and he shut his eyes closed, protecting himself from the light with his hand.

"Auntie Kakyuu!" came a girl's voice, making him frown as he saw, amazed, a little girl walking out of the light and jumping happily towards his Princess. But when she saw him, green eyes went wide opened and she squealed happily. Ecstatic, even. "Daddy!" the girl exclaimed, jumping up to him.

But Kakyuu stopped her before the girl could reach him, getting off the bench and placing both hands on the girl's small shoulders, making her blink and frown, pouting up to his Princess.

Kakyuu smiled. "He's still a bit lost," she explained.

"Oh…" the girl mumbled, lowering her eyes and fidgeting with the ribbon around the waist of her light green summer dress.

"What…" he tried to ask, but the words failed him.

Soft green eyes looked up at him, big and wide and filled with hope and love, as the girl smiled shyly up at him. And Kakyuu knelt down beside the girl, gently messing her hair a little bit and making her look into her red eyes instead, as the girl giggled softly up to the Fireball Princess.

"You need to let go now, Seiya," Kakyuu said, looking up at him again. "You need to let go and find your way back home."

"Home?" he mumbled, confused, lost, hurt…

"With mommy!" the girl exclaimed, jumping up excitedly again, and then pouting cutely and sheepishly when Kakyuu glared at her.

But then his Princess smiled, slightly shaking her head before red eyes looked into his midnight blues. She nodded her head and he gulped, suddenly nervous for whatever reason, as the realization finally hit him.

This was a goodbye.

As if reading his thoughts, Kakyuu's smile turned both soft and sad, as she stood up, encircling her arms around his neck.

"I'll be watching over," she whispered softly into his ear.

His breath got caught in his throat and he held on to her, breathing her in. That scent, that familiar, dear, rich scent of fresh olives invading his nostrils and making his heart sink in sadness and longing. Tears came to his eyes and he blinked, letting out a chocked gasp.

She broke the embrace, looking down on the girl standing beside them for a moment, before looking at him again. A happy, proud, approving smile coming to her lips as the girl smiled up to him, happily and lovingly.

"Go," Kakyuu said, nodding her head.

He took a deep breath, slightly nodding his head and mentally readying himself for whatever it was to come.

The girl reached up one small hand up for him to take, smiling. And her smile reached her soft green eyes, making them shine in the sunlight, as if she was just so happy to be with him. And just like that, with that sweet smile and those soft emeralds filled with nothing but unconditional love, his fear and uncertain disappeared.

Warmth, love and content filled his chest as he reached out, taking the small hand in his, nesting it in his palm and holding on to it. And as small fingers reached him, the light the girl had emerged from came back, engulfing him completely.

The last thing he saw was soft green eyes, as the girl smiled up to him, and then everything went completely white.

.-.

He walked out of the elevator, carrying his bags.

The delayed flight had completely ruined his plans for the night, for it was already too late for that. It was almost one in the morning; everyone would surely be far asleep by now, and he knew it. He also knew they all understood and were not going to hold that against him. But it still pissed him off a little; they were his friends, and as crazy and not exactly normal as they all were, they provided a very much needed quota of normalcy to his hectic life.

He loved his career, and he always enjoyed being on stage. But when it took him away for weeks or even months at a time, away from his friends and, more importantly, away from his girlfriend, well, it was bothering, to say the least. Even if he would always find a loop in his schedule to play a little disappearance act for a day or two…

He shook his head, inserting the key and entering into the dark apartment. He made it straight to his bedroom, fishing for his cell phone on his back pocket. Maybe she was still awake…

But as he entered the room, he stopped dead on his tracks. A smile coming to his lips at the sight waiting for him there. Because curled under the covers, hugging his pillow and wearing an old t-shirt she had so obviously borrowed from his wardrobe, right in the middle of the bed, was the person he had just meant to call, who's voice he had been just dying to hear.

The one woman he had missed the most, the one he wanted to see and hug and kiss more than anything was right there, on his apartment, on his bed, sleeping.

She broke into his apartment. Again.

Maybe it was time to give her a key…

Forgetting about the bags, deciding those could wait until morning, he silently took his jacket, jeans and shirt off. Without even bothering on putting on his pajamas, he slid under the covers in nothing but his boxers, smiling in pure and simple bliss when the sleeping blonde in there was fast to move close to him, letting go of the pillow and hugging him instead.

"Missed you," was the sleepy, husky whisper that reached his ears as she rested her head on his chest.

And he smiled again, passing an arm around her shoulders and keeping her close. "I missed you too, babe."

A happy, sleepy sigh reached him then as she nuzzled her face against his neck for a moment, before falling back asleep again.

With the smile never leaving his features, he closed his eyes, letting sleep take him as well.

.-.

He was laughing.

The beautiful woman standing next to him laughed too, playfully hitting his chest. Flickering one long strand of purple hair off her shoulder, she smiled, raising her drink in toast before taking a sip. And he raised his own in return, before taking a sip from his beer bottle as well.

Someone asked to take a picture of them, and they complied. Passing an arm around her waist, she leaned in on him, smiling up to the camera as the flash blinded them momentarily. And they laughed again, blinking the white spots in their vision away, when he spotted one blonde head in the distance. Noticing she was making her way the opposite direction, right towards the exit, he frowned.

Excusing himself, he made his way through the sea of dancing bodies as fast as he could, following the blonde head. He finally reached her on the emergency stairs that led to the outside, and called out to her. But she ignored him, and he sped up, jumping down the last few steps separating them.

"Hey!" he exclaimed, taking her hand in his and forcing her to stop and turn to look at him. "Where are you going?"

"Leave me the fuck alone!" she yelled, shoving both her hands into his chest and pushing him off.

He frowned, surprised out of his mind. "Haruka, what…"

"Go back to your friend," she said, eying him up and down and turning back around.

He blinked. "What are you talking about?" he asked, grabbing by her forearm and making her spin back around, stopping her.

"You were all over her!" she yelled. "And she's hot, so why wouldn't you be all over her?"

Again, he just blinked.

Yes, the woman he had been just talking to was a beautiful woman. There was no arguing about that. For a supermodel, she was something else. She was funny, she was not afraid of being the center of a joke, and most importantly, she had brains. They had met a while ago, during the shooting of one of his videos where she had played the leading female role and, consequently, he had spent the best part of those two long days laughing until his jaw and stomach hurt.

So, yes, she was beautiful. But besides the fact she wasn't exactly his type and the woman in question was on a serious, steady relationship with someone, he was on a serious, steady relationship himself, with a woman that he loved.

Even if she was acting crazy right now. Maybe he was a bit tipsy, and he knew she had had one or two drinks as well. But she was nowhere near drunk enough to reach that completely nonsense state, so why wasn't she making any sense right now?

"So go on, fuck her, and leave me alone!" the blonde yelled, again ready to turn around and storm off.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me," he grunted, grabbing her by both arms and pushing her against the wall just so she wouldn't get a chance to walk away. "Are you for real?"

"Get off me!"

"Damn it, Haruka!" he yelled, shaking her lightly and looking straight into her green eyes. "I _love_ you. What else do you want?"

"I want you to leave me alone," she answered, trying to fight him off. "Let go!"

"No!" he exclaimed, keeping her against the wall. "Stop fighting me, damn it!" he grunted again, pressing himself against her and grabbing her by the wrists, pinning her in place. And as she was just about to yell again, he did the only thing he could think of to shut her up.

He kissed her.

Deep and hard, he kissed her. Fiercely; tongues wrestling together, fighting for dominance.

"You drive me fucking crazy, did you know that?" he asked against her lips after he broke the kiss.

She tried to fight him again, trying to release herself, but he didn't let her. And then she growled, biting his lower lip and bucking her hips against his, instantly fuelling his desire.

"Fuck me," she said in such a commanding, grunting, downright sexual tone.

He went for her pants, working the belt. Impatient fingers helped him, and he proceeded to undo his own pants next, hurriedly working with the zipper.

Making her turn around and pushing her against the wall, he did as he was told.

.-.

He found it curious that they were celebrating Mamoru's birthday almost two weeks later. But the girls had said something about the earthen Prince being busy, what with his working hours at the hospital and all, and today seemed to be the only day they were all free to get together and celebrate.

So, here he was. Beer bottle in hand and easily resting against the table on the backyard, secretly amused. Not because he found Minako and Rei's usual bickering funny -which, admittedly, he did- or because he thought Ami's blushing face, as Makoto and Usagi asked her about some date with one of her classmates, was cute -it was. Oh no, he was secretly amused because they all kept on sending questioning glances his way, every now and then whispering something to each other, but never once daring to actually go and ask him directly.

Mamoru seemed to be, as for the moment, completely clueless, while both Yaten and Taiki would send questioning glares his way. They probably had a good idea of how things had developed, considering his mood was noticeably better than what it had been for the last two weeks.

But that didn't seem to be enough of an answer. Therefore, the questioning glares.

Only three people seemed to be perfectly aware of what had happened, but that didn't surprise him. They lived together, after all. And while Hotaru was busy talking and laughing to a completely clueless earthen Prince, Setsuna and Michiru would every now and then throw knowing glances and smiles his way, as they all waited for the last guest of their Sunday, Western styled barbecue to finally arrive from her every Sunday, traditional breakfast with her father.

Completely unashamed, he was having his little share of fun. And when one specific tall woman finally made it, casually walking in around the house, taking easy strides, he had to actually fight off the smile that wanted to break into his features, going for a rising of one black eyebrow instead. And all conversations died off as she made her way straight to him. He could literally feel all eyes on them as she finally reached him and, taking him by the collar of his shirt, she jerked in, crushing their mouths together.

An echo of Oh's and Ah's and shocked, surprised gasp filled the air all around the backyard then. And he knew the questions they had been all asking in hushed whispers had just been answered, though probably only to be replaced by new ones.

It's been only three days, after all. And he had spent half of that time with the woman now in his arms, in the privacy of his apartment, with barely any clothes on -or none at all-, getting to know one another more and just enjoying each other's company. Cell phones had been turned off, all and any phone calls going straight to the answering machine during their time together, and everyday life and commitments had done the rest, making it impossible for his friends to try all the tricks in the book to try and find out what had happened after they both left the Temple that afternoon.

But he ignored them all, letting his hands go to those glorious hips and that small, incredibly thin waist, keeping the woman close to him as long, slender fingers caressed the back of his neck.

"Did I miss something?" he heard Mamoru asking.

"Just one small little chapter on the big novel we all missed," was, to Seiya's surprise, Ami's answer.

.-.

"I still can't believe this," he murmured.

She chuckled, playing with their joined hands and caressing his wrist with her free hand.

After a late dinner they had moved to the couch. Kisses and hugs would now and then interrupt their conversation as they just sat there, with him on his boxers and her wearing nothing but a white shirt she had borrowed from his closet and those sexy panties of hers. Soft, incredibly long, heavenly shaped legs naked and exposed for him to admire and mindlessly caress as she sat there, one leg under her, the other out and stretched, comfortably resting over his own legs.

"I mean, you and me…"

"It's insane, I know," she finished for him, chuckling again.

But then she tilted her head to a side, looking at him. Her trademark sided smile coming to her lips, though this time with a clear hint of shyness to it as that blush he was begging to absolutely adore came to her cheeks.

Letting go of his hand, she moved to sit on his legs, straddling him. "It's gonna take me a while, you know?" she said, as she caressed the back of his neck with her long, soft fingers. Her blush deepening. "To get used to things…"

Dear Lord, she was so incredibly cute, all blushed like that…

He smiled knowingly. "You mean, this?" he asked, placing his hands on her hips and bringing her closer to him. Their sexes brushing against one another at the movement; separated only by the material of their underwear, she could feel the effect she had on him by just sitting on his lap like that, half naked and with the shirt buttoned up only half way, leaving a more than generous cleavage for him to admire.

She gasped softly, nodding her head. "Yeah," she whispered against his lips.

He kissed her.

He knew it was probably the biggest shock for her; him being male. But she didn't seem particularly repulsed by such -not so small- detail. Quite the opposite, actually. She was eager, and enthusiastic, and curious. And she could take as long as she wanted, taking her time to get to know him better on the strictly physical way. He had no problem taking his own sweet time on getting more acquainted with her body, anyway.

And right now seemed like a good time to start.

.-.

They took the plastic shit wrapping the thing and tossed it aside. Hands on his hips, he nodded his head, ready to go for the coffee table that was meant to go right in front of the couch they had just put in place.

But when he saw her letting herself fall over the new couch, he frowned. "I thought you wanted to get everything done today," he pointed out.

"I do," she said, nodding her head and smiling up to him. "But this couch needs to be christenized."

And with that, she reached out and took his hand, jerking from it and making him fall on the couch, right next to her. And she was fast to straddle him then, taking the loose white tank top she was wearing off.

He chuckled, shaking his head as she encircled her arms around his neck. "We should go to therapy or something," he joked, letting his hands wander off over jean covered thighs. "This couch thing can't be normal…"

She straightened her back then, arching a questioning eyebrow. "You really wanna talk about what's up with us and this harmless little couch fetish of ours," she said, as she let go of his neck, going for the hook of her bra instead and taking it off, "or would you like to leave that for later?" she finished, smiling knowingly and mischievously.

Encircling one arm around her slim waist and brining her down and closer to him again, he reached up a hand, cupping one glorious, full breast with his other hand. "Later," he answered in a low, sensual whisper.

.-.

Blue eyes flung opened and a chocked, mute gasp escaped him.

Lost and disorientated for a moment, he frowned, staring down at the naked woman beside him. Memories from what had transpired between them just a few hours ago filled his mind, and he watched her as she slept, with her back to him, curled to a side, peacefully and soundlessly. And even like that, sleeping, and doing nothing at all, the sight of her was enough to make his heart jump.

Letting his hand slid to her front and down, a small, proud, happy smile made it to his lips as he caressed her still flat stomach. Dying to feel that life growing inside her again, but not wanting to disturb her sleep, he rested his head over the pillows again, nuzzling his nose against her long, soft neck and breathing her in as he closed his eyes again, letting sleep claim him once more.


	34. Chapter 33

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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><p>I miss those blue eyes<br>how you kissed me at night.  
>I miss the way we sleep.<br>Like there's no sunrise,  
>like the taste of your smile,<br>I miss the way we breathe.

But I never told you  
>what I should have said.<br>No, I never told you,  
>I just held it in. And now,<br>I miss everything about you.  
>Can't believe that I still want you<br>after all the things we've been through,  
>I miss everything about you<br>without you.

I see your blue eyes  
>every time I close mine.<br>You make it hard to see.  
>Where I belong to<br>when I'm not around you?  
>It's like I'm alone with me.<p>

But I never told you  
>what I should have said.<br>No, I never told you,  
>I just held it in. And now,<br>I miss everything about you  
>(Still, you're gone)<br>Can't believe that I still want you  
>(And I'm lovin' you, I never should've walked away)<br>after all the things we've been through  
>(I know it's never gonna come again)<br>I miss everything about you  
>without you.<p>

**(I never told you - Colbie Caillat)**

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><p><strong>33<strong>

She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath.

She had been laying awake, curled against him and with her head resting over his chest for the last fifteen minutes or so. And she just laid there, listening to his steady heartbeat, breathing him in and hoping for the minutes to go by slowly, for time not to pass at all.

She didn't want to move, she didn't want to think. She didn't want him to wake up either; she dreaded that morning after talk, knowing full well there were still questions and doubts in his head. And she really didn't want to have that conversation right now.

She knew she was being childish, holding on to nothing but wishful thinking. And she was being selfish too; with or without his memories, she knew him well enough to know he wouldn't just wake up, get dressed and leave without much of a word. Not because she was carrying his baby, but because he was just not that kind of guy. And if anything, teenage Seiya was that much more of a hopeless, romantic -naïve- dreamer than the twenty year old she had fallen in love with.

Still, she didn't want him to wake up. She just wanted to enjoy the moment; with her eyes closed, she could pretend like nothing was wrong, like everything was still the same.

But, of course, fate, the universe really, wouldn't have it her way, and her little pretend morning fantasy came to an end. His breathing changed, his chest rose up as he took in a deep breath, and she knew he was awake. She felt him moving, yet she refused to leave her spot over his chest.

"Don't," she whispered, forcing his hand to stay in place over her shoulder the minute he tried to move it away. Not even caring about the pleading tone to her voice, she knew he heard her when he stopped, staying still.

"Haruka…"

"Please, just…" she trailed off, slightly, hesitantly caressing his bare chest with the tip of her fingers. "Can we just lay here for a while and… not talk?"

She felt more than heard him letting out a sigh as he tightened his grip around her shoulders, caressing the arm she held across his chest with his free hand. And she closed her eyes again, resting her cheek against his chest, unwilling to move. A part of her was dying to look up, to stare into those deep, midnight blue eyes she loved so much. But she was terrified of doing so only to find doubt and uncertainty and discomfort. Though she knew he wasn't exactly uncomfortable; he would have moved away already if he was. But still. She was afraid of looking up, and not find that simple, honest love she used to see in those blue eyes of his.

And he seemed to be willing to give her that, to allow her this one moment. So she relaxed again, just laying there, with him by her side. No words, no questions, no thoughts; no what if's, no 'where do we go from here?' or 'what do we do now?'; right now, it was just the two of them, laying in bed, holding one another.

But, again, the universe wouldn't have it her way.

His cell phone rang.

An awkward silence engulfed them then, interrupted only by the device ringing insistently. By the third ring, she let out a defeated sigh, getting off his chest. Not even bothering with covering herself with the sheets -what for? He had already seen her naked, anyway-, she fished for her sleeping shirt, laying forgotten on the floor.

"You should get that," she said, getting up from the bed and turning to look at him, masterly avoiding his eyes.

"Yeah," he mumbled, moving to sit up.

She just nodded her head, making her way into the bathroom and giving him the time to answer the phone and the privacy to get his pants back on.

She heard him moving around the room as he answered the call, and she tried to block him away. Opening the faucet, she splashed water on her face, staring into her own green eyes. For a moment, she toyed with the idea of crushing her fist, hard and strong, against the damn mirror; it would surely help lose some of the tension and frustration. But it wouldn't make everything else go away; that whole in her chest, that pain, would still be there afterwards. And if anything, punching the mirror would only add bleeding knuckles to her pain.

Instead, she just limited herself to wash her teeth and rearrange her hair with her hands. Happy that she hadn't emptied her stomach by the toilet, she decided she was hungry. She couldn't even remember when was the last time she had a good, healthy, full breakfast, and she wasn't even sure she would be able to keep it inside her stomach. But it was worth a shot.

Taking her robe and throwing it on, she stepped out of the bathroom and into the bedroom again, risking a glance his way and then trying not to smile at the sight he made. Pants on, belt hanging undone and with his undershirt half way to his forearms, he just stood there, holding the cellphone in place between his shoulder and ear, with his head tilted to a side and a frown decorating his features as he listened to whoever was calling him this early in the morning.

The early hour and his frown told her it was probably important, so she left him to it, signaling the door and down the hallway. Without waiting for him to give any sign that he understood, knowing it wouldn't be hard for him to figure out where she was, she stepped out of the bedroom and down the hallway, making her way downstairs.

She made a straight line to the kitchen, pouring water on the kettle and placing it over the burner, turning it on. She then took a cup and placed it over the counter, going for the tea next. She came upon the wide variety of teas Makoto got for her and she eyed them curiously. She remembered reading somewhere that there was no scientific proof of red raspberry leaf tea being actually good for pregnant women, but the brunette had been right on one point; it was natural, and it wouldn't hurt to try it out.

She just hoped it wouldn't cause a disagreement with her stomach…

A whine and a ball of fur gracing her leg made her look down, and she chuckled as she looked into Kalina's blue eyes. Already knowing what the dog wanted, she went into the living room, with her pup happily and excitedly right at her heels.

She slid the door open for the dog to go out to the backyard just as she heard Seiya coming down the stairs. Bracing herself for what was to come, she turned around. Already full dressed, he had a strange look upon his face, as if he was just about to apologize for something.

And Haruka knew right there, she wasn't going to like whatever he was about to say.

"I have to go," he announced, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly while pointing at the main door with his free hand.

She blinked.

Surprised, she opened and closed her mouth, frowning. That was certainly not what she thought he was about to say. It saved her from an awkward morning after conversation, and it was definitely better than him apologizing. Still, she wasn't sure she liked it.

"Yeah," he said, as if reading her surprise. "Souta called," he provided. "Apparently, he forgot to mention that CanCam Magazine has exclusive, full coverage of the concert, and that includes a 'behind the scenes' photo shot and interviews…"

"Oh," she said, slightly nodding her head. But then she frowned again. "He _forgot_?" the blonde asked, knowing full well Souta rarely ever forgot anything. Which was what made him such a great manager in the first place.

The singer chuckled, easily guessing her line of thoughts. "Yeah," he said. "Something about not wanting to overwhelm me with journalists after the accident…" he said, vaguely waving a hand around.

One blonde eyebrow went up at that.

What was the point on not telling him about the interviews in order to avoid overwhelming him, if he still had to go through with it, anyway? One thing was for sure though; Souta was lucky Seiya still didn't remember a thing. Because the Seiya she knew not only hated being kept in the dark about things like that, but also hated when journalists got a free pass behind stage to cover a show from beginning to end like this. Mainly, because it usually meant no privacy at all, stupid, nosy questions being thrown his way nonstop, and journalist and cameramen being in everybody's way while having to live with a camera pointing at his face the entire time.

Not that he had something against journalism. It fed the fans, after all. But both Seiya and herself liked to set a line between their work and public lives, and their privacy. And full, exclusive coverage and free passes usually crossed that line. Again, she understood the privacy of a changing room ignited the fans' curiosity; but there was a difference between letting a journalist in and show the -usually small- place around, and having to get changed and ready for the show with a camera pointing straight at the singer's face and butt.

Seiya hated that. He had a bit of a ritual before going on stage, and strangers around usually ruined it for him, keeping him from having that moment of piece and quietness before heading out. She didn't exactly know teenage Seiya that well, and maybe him being so cautious around journalists and what the boundaries of a so called full coverage were was something he learned with time. So chances were Souta wouldn't get yelled at for not telling him that bit of information.

She just hoped Seiya was ready to face them. With his memory still gone, she hoped there wouldn't be any question thrown his way he wouldn't know the answer of…

"Didn't make that much sense…" the singer mumbled, scratching the back of his neck. "Anyway!" he exclaimed, taking a deep breath. "I should…"

"Get going," she finished for him, nodding her head. "Yeah, you should," she agreed. "Want some coffee before you go?" she asked, pointing at the general direction of the kitchen as she did so.

He winced. "I don't want you getting sick," he pointed out, remembering her the scent of coffee was not exactly her favorite smell in the world these days. "I can get some on my way."

"Right," she mumbled, nodding her head and lowering her gaze. "Ok," she whispered, not wanting to look up and into his eyes.

The unexpected call saved her from an awkward conversation, but it didn't exactly save her from all and any awkward moment. And this was exactly it. What was she supposed to say to him now? 'Thanks for coming by and fucking me, I really needed that'? Sure, it wasn't exactly untrue, and she was quite a bit more sensitive than usual on that particular area. But that was not the reason why she did it.

She missed him.

She loved him, and she wanted to be with him. In every sense; in all and every possible way.

An embarrassed blush made it to her cheeks as flashes from last night invaded her mind. And she just stood there, fidgeting with the sleeves of her robe, not knowing what to say. But when she heard him moving, she risked a look up just to see him doing something she didn't expect him to do.

Taking long, easy strides and meeting the distance between them, he cupped her chin, tilting her face towards him and capturing her lips with his.

It was a sweet kiss. Soft and tender, he met her lips again and again as his hands made it around her waist. Taken by surprise, but too caught up by his lips, his touch, his warmth, she just stood there, raising her hands up and grabbing the material of his sweater, answering to his small, tender kisses.

God, she missed him. She missed this…

As soon as that thought crossed her mind, she realized the forces of the universe were definitively against her that morning. His cellphone beeped and he broke the kiss, taking the device out of his pocket and looking at the screen.

"'Don't forget to bring breakfast'," he read, showing her the text he just received from his guitarist as he rolled his eyes.

She chuckled. "You better go and feed your band members," she teased.

"Yeah…" he agreed, chuckling too and shaking his head, amused. But then he looked up at her again, cupping her cheek with one hand and gently caressing it with his thumb.

The soft, small smile he gave her, lifting up the corner of his lips as he looked at her straight in the eyes was enough to drown her. It was the kind of smile he would give to her, with that loving light dancing in his midnight blues, that could always make her feel like falling in love with him all over again. But right now, it just confused her; it made her feel so lost…

Standing on unsteady ground, she just looked right into his eyes, unsure of what to say or what to do now.

"I'll call you later," he said, with nothing but tenderness pouring out of his voice, and that light in his eyes never fading.

"Ok," she said, nodding her head.

With a suddenly heavy heart, she watched him go, stepping out of the door and the house. And she took a deep breath, trying to fight her sudden sadness, only to make the hole in her chest more evident.

Shaking her head, she made her way into the kitchen again. But she was no longer in the mood for breakfast, so she turned the burning ring off. Leaving kettle, teacup and bag forgotten on the counter, she stepped into the living room again, laying herself down on the couch and raising both feet up, hugging her legs.

She was tough. She was strong. There were many things she could deal with, all by herself. But this was just not one of those things. She really didn't know how to go about it. This middle point, this in between was just so confusing. And, in between of what, exactly? They had been sort of friends for the last couple of weeks. But then they just spent the night together. Did that make them lovers? Friends with benefits?

Was that even possible?

She shook her head, taking a deep breath. Even if it was possible, it was something she didn't want.

She wanted it all.

She had always been a black or white kind of person, and she wanted it all. And this middle point, blurred and undefined, was more than she could handle and just nowhere near enough. And it wasn't even the undefined situation they were in what bothered and confused her so much; it was not knowing where he stood, what he felt. About her, and about them.

Being this unsure of him was driving her insane.

In a way, Taiki had been right; Seiya was still there. He was still the same. His memories were gone, but his personality, his essence was the same. The long talks with him proved her that much. He didn't remember facts and events, but his way of thinking, of rationalizing things, the way he spoke and how he went about things; the way he kissed her, the way he touched her; it was all the same.

The question wasn't if whether or not she could still love him. She did; with all her heart, with everything she was. The real question was, could he learn to love her again?

She knew he was over the hating her phase. That much was obvious. And he seemed to be developing feelings for her as well. Last night would have never happened otherwise, and that little demonstration just this morning pointed towards that direction.

But she knew him too well.

The questions that hurt and scared her the most were probably the same ones that plagued his mind. Was he really feeling something for her because of her, because of who she was, or because she just happened to be pregnant with his baby? Was he really starting to feel something for her, or was it just a product and a sum up of everything around them? Were his feelings -whatever those were- real, or was he just trying to fool himself?

She knew he wouldn't deliberately hurt her. Not on purpose; he was just not that kind of guy. But the truth was, her ending up getting hurt was a very real possibility.

A soft whine made her looked down, only to find Kalina standing next to her. The dog's blue eyes looked up at her and then to the door, before letting out another whine.

A sad smile made it to her lips then. "I know," she said, petting her pup. "I miss him too."

Gently and tenderly playing with Kalina's ears, green eyes wandered off to the portion of the sky she could see from the wide backyard sliding doors.

Last night, while they were making love, she had been terrified to look into his eyes. She had been unable to keep his gaze for longer than a few seconds, scared of what she might find there. And just this morning, she had found herself on that same situation, with that same fear eating her up, only to find that sweet, tender light dancing in blue eyes. And it filled her heart as much as it pained her, and she honestly didn't know what to except now.

There was nothing left for her to do but wait. One way or the other, he had to make up his mind and she would have to respect his feelings and decision, whichever way he took. But it was the waiting more than the result in itself what unnerved her so much; it left her feeling lost, more alone than ever, and too scared to hope.

Still, there was nothing left to do, but wait. And maybe, just maybe, he'll come back to her.


	35. Chapter 34

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

.

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**A.N.:** So sorry for taking me so long to update this! I've been busy lately, and then I got inspired to write another story, so I got sucked by it, and well... what can I say? I suck at multitasking.

Good news is, the end is very, very near! So take this as a slightly-early Christmas present! Hope you enjoy it! You know the deal, R&R!

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><p>Wise men say only fools rush in<br>But I can't help falling in love with you.

Shall I stay? Would it be a sin?  
>'Cause I can't help falling in love with you.<p>

As the river flows, gently to the sea  
>darling, so we go. Somethings were meant to be.<br>Take my hand. Take my whole life too.  
>'Cause I can't help falling in love with you.<p>

**(Can't help falling in love with you - Darren Hayes ****[****'cause I like his version better****]****)**

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><p><strong>34<strong>

Like a whale. That's how she felt.

Actually, she felt more like a meat roulade. She was the meat, her pants were the string, and her hips in general and ass in particular were the filling, just about to explode any second now.

Why on earth did she think she could pull this off? She had spent the best part of the last two months either sitting on uncomfortable chairs beside a hospital bed, or riddled to a bed herself. Or just sitting around and doing not much at all, with everyone around her forcing food down her throat. That was, when she was not doing it herself, having inexplicable and uncontrollable urges to eat cheese burgers in the middle of the night, or devouring cheese rolls with whipped cream over them, or half a cheesecake all by herself while sitting in front of the TV. Actually, she discovered she craved for anything with cheese these days; she had added large amounts of all kinds of rich in fat cheese to her usually healthy diet, and this was the end result now.

She was fat. And her pants were resenting it.

Sure, she was pregnant, and it was normal to gain weight. And her belly was slowly beginning to swollen up. It wasn't exactly showing yet, and she could easily hide it with her clothes. But dressing pants were not supposed to be this tight around the hips and bottom, and her ego wouldn't let her go out and letting the entire world assume she was just gaining weight and earning herself a huge ass.

"Are you ready?" Seiya's voice came from the bedroom.

A growl was the only response she gave as she took the pants off.

She had originally planned on wearing a simple suit and tie. But that was obviously not going to work, considering none of her dressing pants would fit her properly. She could keep the white dressing shirt, but she obviously had to find something else to go along with that.

Sure, it was a benefit concert. But there would be enough rock and pop idols, and some other personalities from the spotlights; that usually meant not just a concert, but also a bit of a fashion show as well. And the dressing code for those occasions was not exactly formal; she could pull off a cool and fashionable look easily enough, with no need to wear something that would let others know exactly how many pounds she had gained in the last two months…

"Haruka?" Seiya called out again, as his black head popped up from the door frame.

"Just a minute," she said, just as she was putting on a pair of black leather pants.

Tight and black. Perfect.

She hadn't reached that point were tight was a big no-no, and black always helped to conceal a few extra pounds. The shirt would do the rest, hiding her hips.

Sensing eyes on her, she turned her face around only to find Seiya looking at her. Resting his shoulder against the walk-in closet doorframe, hands in his washed-out black jeans and an amused smile dancing on his lips.

"I'm almost done," she apologized, working a simple black tie and letting it hang loose around her neck, undoing the first two buttons of her shirt to add to the desired effect.

It never took her this long to get ready.

Not that he remembered that, but still. She felt bad for making him wait for her while she got dressed. Being late was just not an option; not when his appearance on stage was going to be one of the main attractions of the night.

Good luck she already had her makeup done. Just a bit of blush over her cheeks, a generous amount of black and grey eyeshadow and black eyeliner to give a smokey eye effect, and natural colored lipstick. Her hair, as usual, hadn't required much work, and she let her wild blonde strands go around her head and face as they pleased.

Not bothering on sitting down, she balanced her weight in one foot, then the other as she put her black leather three inches heeled, buckle stiletto boots on. Straightening herself up again, she made a mental check, making sure she wasn't forgetting anything. But when nothing came to mind, she grabbed a navy blue suit jacket and threw it on; the fabric would help hide her expanding hips while complementing the outfit and her own personal style perfectly.

"Good choice," she heard Seiya's comment, making her turn around just to see him eying her up and down, nodding his approval. "Vanima elea."

She stumbled upon her own feet. "What?" she asked, grabbing one of the shelves on the closet for support as she tried to balance herself, blinking up to him, surprised out of her mind.

Did he say what she thought he said? It was barely a whisper… Did she hear him right?

Why would he say that? Yes, she was sure he at least liked her, and he had previously admitted himself he was attracted to her. So it wasn't such a rare thing for him to say something like that. And yet...

To say things were awkward between the two was an understatement. As he had promised, he had called her the day before, but only to say he had forgotten his clothes for the show there. After saying he needed to make some sort of arrangements and that he would be busy and wouldn't be able to come by until right before the show, he had all but hung up on her.

She could understand he was busy, maybe even nervous and edgy about tonight, and there hadn't really been a chance for them to talk. After showing up barely two hours ago, they both had started getting ready for tonight, getting showered and dressed, and again, the time for that -by now, very delayed- morning after conversation just never came.

But she couldn't help but notice there was something off about him. He would keep his distance at times, saying only what was necessary and then keep quiet. And then it was as if he couldn't help himself, unable to resist it, and he would gift her with a smile -his smile; the one he would always save only for her-, or a soft, tender kiss on the cheek. Or he would go and say something, just like what he said just now, in barely an audible whisper; the kind of endearing, teasing thing Seiya would normally say to her. And it was because of that that it only confused her even more.

"Ready?" he asked, completely and deliberately ignoring her question, and stepping off the frame he was resting against, walking back into the room with all the intention of get going.

Biting back the growl that wanted to escape her, she shook her head, stepping out of the walk-in closet as well. She followed him out of the room and down the stairs, and after making sure Kalina had water and food on her plates, she grabbed her keys, ready to head out.

There would be no driving tonight. It had been arranged for a car to pick them up and take them to the hotel the show was being held on, and then back home. She wasn't particularly keen on being drive around, having to depend on a chauffeur, but she wasn't about to argue with the organization that had put the show together. There wasn't much room for arguing, anyway, and at least this way she wouldn't have to worry about the valet guy scratching her car...

Already waiting for them, standing right next to the impeccable black car, the chauffeur opened the door for them to get in and then went around it, getting in himself and starting the car. And as the houses of their neighborhood started passing by through the window, she turned around to look at the men sitting next to her.

"Nervous?" she asked, if only to break the silence.

A small smile tugged at the corner of his lips at her question, almost imperceptible but still there, as he tilted his head to a side, rearranging his tie. "A little," he admitted. "Anxious, is more like it," he then corrected himself, as his smile grew just a little bit.

She frowned.

Really, what was it about him today? He was acting so strange. It was exactly the way Seiya always acted when he wanted to play the mystery card and surprise her. And though she didn't want to over think it, she didn't want to see and read signs that weren't there, she couldn't help the small light of hope that was tickling at the tip of her stomach.

Was he starting to remember something? Anything at all?

Even if he wasn't, he was planning something. She was sure of it; she knew him too well. She just didn't know what was going on on that black head of his, and she honestly didn't know what to expect out of whatever it was he was hiding under his sleeve.

She just prayed it wouldn't involve any embarrassing moment on her part...

The car made it to the hotel too fast for her liking, and taking a deep breath, she accepted Seiya's hand, stepping out of the car. The flashes started immediately, capturing every second, every move, and they both smiled and waved to the cameras. His hand made it to her waist, easily and casually, and that hollow inside her chest attacked her once more.

He was playing the part perfectly, yet she couldn't help but resent him for it.

"Haruka! Seiya!" the reporters yelled at them from behind the red rope.

"Seiya! What will you be singing tonight?" one of them asked, pointing a microphone his way.

The singer smiled. "I don't want to ruin the surprise for the fans," he answered, easily, and he gifted the reporter and the cameras all around with one of his radiant, confident, charming smiles. "You're gonna have to wait and see."

As expected, questions jumped his way, and they both chuckled and smiled to the cameras, waving their hands as they made the way inside.

"Feeding the expectations?" she teased, once the doors closed behind them and a guard guided them into the room the show and after party were to be held on.

"Yeah, you know... selling the fantasy."

She stopped dead on her tracks at that, blinking up at him. And he looked right back at her, shoving his hands into his jean pockets almost sheepishly. That smile, that soft, tender, loving smile dancing on his lips, and those midnight blues shining up to her.

"Seiya..." she called out to him, in a low, trembling whisper. "What..."

"Finally!" a female voice interrupted her before she could even began to form a half coherent question in her mind, making them both turn around only to find Seiya's drummer girl marching her way up to them. "We need to talk!"

"Well, hello to you too," Seiya said, obviously amused, for whatever reason.

Black eyes narrowed at him then, before she turned to look at the tall blonde. "You mind if I take him away?" she asked to her while not so nicely grabbing Seiya by the arm. "Don't worry, I promise I won't hurt him," she then assured her, before narrowing her eyes again and looking at the singer in question. "Much."

.-.

She dragged him off and away before the racer had time to react at all. Oh, well, she'd apologize for her rudeness later. Right now, she had a singer to yell at.

Walking into the dressing room she knew had been assigned to the singer, she dragged him inside and then shut the door closed behind her.

"Are you freaking mental?" she asked, hands going up in the air in pure exasperation and barely able to keep herself from yelling at the top of her lungs; neither of them wanted this little argument to leak to the press, after all. "Why did you change tracks?"

"I told you…"

"I know what you said!" she interrupted him. "But you didn't say anything about changing the freaking track list!"

He frowned, apparently not understanding her anger. "But I thought you liked it…"

No, he obviously didn't.

"That's not the point!" she yelled. "I don't even _know_ this song!"

"It's not such a hard one… and you're the best drummer I know. You can do this," he said, trying to buy her off with his one of his charming smiles.

Which only pissed her off even more. Who did he think she was? One of his drooling fans? She was dangerously close from punching the guy, and she vaguely wondered what the headlines would be if he showed up on stage with a black eye and a bleeding nose…

"That's not the point either!"

"Then what _is_ the point?" he asked, actually having the nerve of getting a bit exasperated himself.

She took a deep breath, reminding herself that punching Seiya right now was just not an option; that would have to wait a few days. Or maybe she could do so tomorrow…

"I hope you realize how much trouble you just cost me, pal," she said, growling lowly.

He blinked. "I can honestly say I have absolutely no idea what you mean by that."

She growled again, punching him on the chest. Not hard enough to actually hurt him, but hard enough to make a point and make the guy shut up. And when he just blinked at her, blue eyes wide and big, she growled.

"You know what?" she said, eyeing him up and down rather angrily. "Instead of spending the last week locked up in a freaking studio with you, practicing songs you just decided not to play, I could've spent it playing doctor with a very gorgeous woman!" she finished, raising both hands up in the air.

One black eyebrow went up at that, teasingly. "Let me guess," he said, smiling, actually amused, "a doctor?"

"A very hot one!" she exclaimed, raising her hands up again. "Do you have any idea how long it's been since I got laid?" she asked. "Two weeks!" she then answered her own question. "Two long, fucking weeks spent with _your_ sorry ass instead of a nice one!" she finished, shoving both hands on his chest and pushing him.

He chuckled, and to his credit, he did look like he was trying not to laugh -not that it helped much, but at least the guy was trying-, as she shrunk his shoulders. "I'm sorry, ok?" he apologized. "It was sort of a last moment thing…"

She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. "What did you do?" she asked, massaging the brick of her nose.

"What do you mean?"

"To Haruka!" she exclaimed, easily losing her temper again before she forced herself to take another deep breath. "What did you do?" she asked again, a bit calmer this time. "Because you obviously did something, this sounds way too much like a lovey dovey declaration," she pointed out. "And, quite frankly? It should be more of an apology…"

"I didn't do anything, ok?" he said, interrupting her. "I just feel like singing this one tonight," he added, giving a small, sided smile that, she had to admit, looked honest enough. "I trust you, Mora. You can pull this one off."

She crossed her arms over her chest at that, shoving her nose up in the air. "I know I can," she said, not caring how arrogant she sounded right now. "But that doesn't make you any less of a dead man after this is over."

He chucked then, as if mentally laughing to some joke Mora didn't get at all.

"Yeah, I know," he said, shoving his hands into his pockets as a rather wistful smile came to his lips and his eyes seemed to get lost on some undefined spot. But then his smile got wider, excited over something, and his eyes lightened up. "But it'd be worth it."


	36. Chapter 35

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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><p><strong>Faia Fire:<strong> woman of little faith! Would it help if I tell you there's only 3 more chaps to this and it's all done?

**Amy Hunt:** hi there! *waves hand* PTB? Sorry, you're gonna have to explain that to me… .

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><p><strong>35<strong>

The amount of drinks of all colors and sizes coming and going was nothing short of startling. Adding the natural amount of excitement from the fans gathered around that had either bought or won a ticket for tonight's benefit, she wondered how long it would take before there was a mass of highly intoxicated people filling the place.

The top area was exclusive, reserved for the celebrities that had been invited for the night. Down the stairs and onto the dancing floor, a stage extended itself on the back of the room, with the wide windows behind it, offering the spectacular view of the well manicured gardens outside.

A young, pretty singer was going through her repertoire; her woman-child voice talking about hearts getting broken and empty spaces needing to be filled. And Haruka was sure she had never hated a song in her life as much as she hated the one the woman was singing right now…

Taking a sip from her water -considering the large variety of drinks that were being offered tonight, it had been surprisingly hard to convince the waiter to just get her some dear old fresh water, giving that there were no non-alcoholics drinks-, she let her eyes wander around, uninterested. Fighting the urge to take a look at her wrist watch, she let out a bored sigh, wondering how much longer it would take for the show to be finally over; she knew Seiya's was one of the last performances of the night, followed by a fifteen year old tenor girl who was, by all means and according to the newspapers, Japan's new little prodigy and jewel and the one closing the show.

Michiru had already been and left the stage -a remarkable performance, as usual-, and the blonde was currently waiting for her friend to come and rescue her from boredom.

After whatever it was Mora had to discuss with Seiya, he had made it to her side again in no time, and they had stayed together playing the part of the golden couple down to perfection. And as much as she hated to know that he was playing the part for the fans and reporters around, she now resented the fact that he was gone and getting ready to perform any moment now, as soon as child-woman left the stage off to him.

He was back at being his charming, confident self, not once being the nervous guy he had been for the last couple of weeks. He was playing the part, but still, something bothered her; he acted as if the night they had shared was no big deal, as if it was completely natural. And though for her it was, at the same time it wasn't, and she was by now dying to know what was going on on that black head of his…

"Penny for your thoughts," a soft, delicate voice she could recognize anywhere got her out of her own head.

Not bothering on turning to face the voice's owner, a smile made it to her lips. "Just trying to come up with something to entertain myself."

"How's that going for you?" Michiru asked, coming to stand by her side as they both rested casual hands against the railing; the balcony-like box they were standing on offered a perfect view of the stage up ahead.

"Not really working," the blonde admitted, smiling again when she turned to look at the violinist, only to see a teasing pout and a -completely fake- disappointed frown coming to the soft features.

"But I thought you enjoyed my performance."

"I did," she assured her. "You know I always do," she added. "But it's this never dying, agonizingly long cry I'm hearing right now what's killing me," she joked, even though she knew she wasn't really joking, and she knew better than to try to fool Michiru.

She just hoped Seiya would be on stage soon. A few pictures, a dance or two, and she could call it a night and go home; she was not in the mood for partying and playing celebrity tonight, and she just hoped Seiya wouldn't mind that much if she left the party earlier.

"Ruka…"

She winced inwardly at the uncomfortably understanding tone in the way Michiru just called her. There was no pity or sorrow, just understanding, and though Haruka loved the violinist to death, right now, she hated her ability to understand her, to read right through her so easily.

She shook her head, turning to look at the aquamarine haired woman and gifting her with one of her dazzling smiles, wanting nothing more than to change the subject before it could even go there.

"What are you up to tonight?" she asked, eying her up and down, only now fully registering Michiru's attire.

The black silk hung from Michiru's form perfectly. The v-neck line insinuating generous breasts as the black little belt marked her thin waist, from where the rest of the dress flown down to the floor in a pleat maxi skirt that made her look regal and beautiful.

Nothing out of the ordinary for the violinist.

"Little Miss sexy dress?" she added, arching an eyebrow for good measure.

Michiru giggled. "Oh, you know, nothing much," she said, taking a sip from her champagne glass. "Play a little, tease a little," she singsong, and Haruka didn't need to ask to know what she meant by playing. Though she was curious as to know who was the violinist planning on doing that with…

A man dressed in an impeccable Yves Saint Lauren jacket and matching pants she recognized as a famous TV host came out on stage then. The spotlight followed him as he gently kissed child-woman's hand and then moved to the middle of the stage. A few jokes here and there, the mandatory thanks to everyone who had made the night possible, and then the moment Haruka wasn't quite sure she was ready for came.

"Are you alright?" Michiru asked, easily picking up on her uneasiness.

Katashi was the first to make it to the stage, going straight for the guitar waiting for him there. Mora followed right after him, positioning herself behind her beloved drums, and then the piano player Haruka wasn't that familiar with, since the guy that usually took that place was out of the country, visiting relatives overseas.

But it was when one particular black haired singer stepped out when the audience exploded in a roar of happy yells and applause, and Haruka's heart sunk to the floor.

God, he looked so good…

"Yeah," she said, answering Michiru's question. "I just want this to be over…"

The first song started, and Seiya's voice filled the room. The amplifiers carrying his voice perfectly, as the words that had once meant so much reached her ears. And she listened, trying not to remember what he had first meant by such words, trying not to remember the feelings and moments that had made him create such lyrics.

Blue eyes landed on her for a moment, and it was all too much. She couldn't stand it, and it took all of her will power to just stand there, with her best poker face mask on.

She couldn't stand knowing he didn't remember. She couldn't stand knowing he was selling out the fantasy. She couldn't stand not knowing what he felt, not knowing if that night they had shared meant anything to him other than just… sex.

By the end of the third song, she was sure she was starting to see things. The lights were playing tricks on her, and she thought she could see that light, that beautiful, loving light shining in midnight blues as he sang. She thought she could half see that charming, sided smile of his behind the microphone, like he always did when one particular memory or another would drift his eyes closed as he gave life to his songs.

In desperate need of fresh air, she told herself she could step out into the balcony, welcome the cold air for a minute or two, and still make it back inside before Seiya finished his show. That way it wouldn't seem too suspicious and weird for her not to be there, listening to her own boyfriend perform.

She wanted nothing more than the night to be over. She wanted the nightmare her life had been for the last two months and which last drop was this entire night and everything it brought with it to be over already. And most of all, she wanted to go back home, pet Kalina a little and maybe take her out for a good run, and then crawl her way into bed.

And maybe allow herself a tear or two.

She was not particularly fond of the idea, and she was sure she had met her quota on that area enough to last her a lifetime. All, in only the last couple of months. But, she figured, her friends were much more open to tears than she was, and they were all perfectly happy with their lives, so maybe they were onto something with all the crying. Besides, she needed a good purge.

"_I was planning on singing 'Summer nights' next,_" Seiya's voice filled the room once more as he spoke, referring to one of his most recent hits, "_but there's been a small change of plans. Hope you don't mind._"

The audience squealed and yelled and applauded, and she tried to make her way through the now crowded box and into the balcony at the end of the room.

"Haruka, wait!" Michiru called out to her, but she ignored her. "Where are you going?"

"I just need some air," she answered, not bothering on turning around.

"_The next song is a bit personal. Well, aren't they all?_" he joked into the microphone. "_Actually, this is the first song I wrote when I first realize I was hopelessly in love with the one woman I was sure would never even bother to look my way._"

That made her stop.

Everything stopped; her heart in her ribcage, her breath in her throat. The voices and noise all around turned mute, and all she could hear was his voice, coming out of the amplifiers.

"_Lucky for me, I was wrong,_" he continued. "_Though she almost broke my nose when finding out about this song,_" he stated. "_The good ol' times,_" he joked, making everyone in the audience laughed.

_Oh my God…_

"_Anyway, as far as you all know, this is a new song,_" he was saying, "_and I hope you guys like it._"

It couldn't be, could it?

But as she stood there, frozen to the spot, and the first accords of the song came through the amplifiers, she knew exactly what his next singed words were going to be.

"_And when you walked into the room I feel the world dissolve. I fall at your feet._"

"Oh my God…" she mumbled, in barely an audible whisper.

"Haruka?" Michiru's voice was at her side, and she turned to look into concerned blue eyes.

"_And when you look at me, I swear the beating of my heart is about to cease._"

"Haruka, are you alright?"

Ignoring her friend, she pushed her way back to her previous spot. Somehow managing to deposit her long forgotten glass of water on a tray as a waitress walked by, she placed shaking hands over the rail, looking at the stage.

"_You make me wanna deny the world, deny the man I wanna be. Deny myself, my individuality._"

Michiru was right beside her again, looking first at the stage, and then at her, with a confused frown upon her face. "Haruka?" she asked, but the blonde didn't even hear her.

The light in his eyes, the sided smile. That look, that honest, loving look decorating his features, and the way he seemed to laugh at some secret joke. The way he had said she looked beautiful tonight, in his native language and only for her ears to hear, just like he always did.

The words echoed in her ears and made her heart beat faster and agonizing slow at the same time, and she hurried her way off the box, needing to see it for herself. Needing to make sure she wasn't seeing things. Because, why else would he be singing this one song?

"Haruka, wait!" she heard Michiru calling after her, guessing her friend was right behind her as she made her way down the stairway and into the packed dance floor.

But she didn't care. All she cared for was making it to the front, and taking a good look into his eyes.

There were too many people, and making her way was harder than she thought. But she didn't care; her feet carried her with her barely noticing, not once tearing her eyes off the black haired man singing on the stage.

The song was already on its bridge, and she was barely in the middle of the dance floor. Too many people were in front of her, and still, she could see him, standing there. His eyes were closed now, one hand over his chest and the other gently grabbing the mic as he poured the words into it.

"Haruka, what is it?" Michiru asked, still concerned and placing a hand over her shoulder, only now making the blonde realize she was shaking.

His eyes opened up then. And there it was. Unmistakably.

"He remembers."

"What?" Michiru asked, either surprised or not having heard her right, Haruka wasn't sure.

"_Sparks fly when our worlds collide, and I am falling at your feet._"

"He remembers," she said again, chocking in her own words as tears jumped to her eyes and she blinked them away, desperately trying, needing, wanting nothing more than to drown in those blue eyes as they locked with hers.

That smile. That soft, charming half smile…

"_Stars shine so much brighter. You make me feel ten feet high and make the colors seem brighter._"

"Oh my God, he remembers!" she exclaimed, laughing, chocking, crying, as her hands flung to her trembling lips and the tears came down her eyes.

"_And my only desire is to sit right by and watch the world falling at your feet_," he drew the song to an end in soft, whispering words, not once taking his eyes off her.

He said something, probably thanked the audience and said his goodbyes. But she didn't listen. All she could see, all that mattered, her entire world turned around those midnight blues she knew and loved so much.

His smile, the light in his eyes, the song. He had to remember. He just had to. Why else would he look at her like that, with that smile, that knowing, conniving, complicit smile dancing in his lips as he sang that one song? The one she had found on his notebook when she broke into his apartment, almost four years ago; that one song he claimed was both special and personal, for it was the first time he had ever wrote about his real, developing feelings for her, finally admitting them to himself, and the first one he had sang for her when she asked about it, that first night at his apartment, while sitting on the couch.

That was their song. Though many more had followed over the years, that one song was theirs.

Seiya walked out of the stage, and the TV host from before stepped in. But she paid him no mind, turning on her heels and pushing her way through the mass of people, ready to follow after the singer.

"Haruka, wait!" she heard Michiru calling after her.

But her best friend's voice or presence was lost to her. All she cared for was finding him, and looking into his eyes and making sure… making absolutely sure he was back. She needed to know, for certain, that the man that had just left the stage was her freaking alien.

She pushed past a guard and heard him calling after her, trying to stop her from getting backstage. From the corner of her eye she saw Michiru stepping right next to the guard, pulling one of her seductive smiles and saying something to the muscular guy while surreptitiously indicating with her hand for her to go on.

Gifting the violinist a small smile of thanks, she turned back around, ready to go -where? It didn't matter. She'll find him-, when her cellphone rang. She took it out of her pocket, growling in frustration and ready to hang up the call before even answering, when the name flashing in there stopped her.

"Seiya?" she said into the phone, with her heart beating in her ears.

"_Hey,_" his voice reached her from the other side of the line. "_You think you could help me out with something?_"

She frowned at the odd question, turning around on her heals and making her way into the hallway that led to the dressing rooms.

"O-ok…"

"_See, three years, six months, and some days ago, I fell in love with a woman,_" he said, in a serious, matter-of-fact tone, and she could easily detect the mirth in it. "_And thanks to some weird, cosmic trick, she loved me back, and it was amazing. It really was,_" he stated, now with nothing but tenderness pouring into his every word.

New tears came to her eyes and she gasped and stopped, trying to calm herself as she listened.

"_But I've been kind of an ass to her lately…_"

She gasped again. "Seiya…"

"_Ok, fine,_" he interrupted, before she could even began to form her words. "_An A class, major ass. With flying colors and all. So, you know…_" he said, now in a sheepish tone in which he tried to pour humor, even if she could hear the regret in his voice. "_I really hurt her, and I made her cry. Not on purpose, of course. But still…_"

The few people around were starting to send off looks her way, but she ignored them all. Keeping her cellphone to her ear, listening to his every word, a mix between a gasp and a chuckle escaped her as she tried in vain to stop the tears from streaming down her cheeks.

"Seiya, I…"

"_No, wait, that's not it,_" he interrupted again. "_I mean, I totally screwed up, because, you see… about a month ago, I fell for this beautiful, sexy, cocky, smartass,_" she laughed through her tears at that, easily catching the endearing, mocking tone to his words, "_amazing woman, who just happens to be the same one I fell for three years, six months and some days ago,_" he continued. "_But like I said, I've been an ass to her, and now I kind of need some help here so that I can make it up to her…_" he trailed off for a moment and she hung to the phone as if it was her lifeline, "_and tell her that this past month away from her has been a living nightmare, and that I would do anything, anything at all to see her smile again._"

Wiping the tears with the back of her hand, she turned back around, going back on her steps through the hallway and looking for him. Her cellphone still glued to her ear as she listened to his words; an image of him jumping to her mind, with his eyes shining in honesty and love and tears, and that beautiful, breathtaking smile dancing on his lips.

"_That I miss waking up with her in my arms,_" he continued, "_and I even miss hearing her say over and over again how easily she could kick my ass,_" she laughed again at that, sniffling soundly and stopping on her tracks, trying to control her own tears. "_I actually miss messing with her and annoying her, just to hear her say that,_" he confessed, amused and not in the least ashamed. "_But most of all, I want… I _need_ her to know that I love her,_" he said, in that sweet, sultry, loving tone of his, filled with nothing but honesty, melting her right then and there. "_Very, very much. And that I never stopped loving her,_" he said, bringing new tears to her eyes, just like that,"_and that I need her. So I was hoping maybe you could help me out here, because the truth is, I'm lost without her…_"

She closed her eyes, not caring if the tears were still running freely down her cheeks. A smile made it to her trembling lips, treasuring each word, vaguely wondering how long had she been waiting to hear that, to hear and know he was back, that he still loved her. But it didn't matter anymore. All that matter was that he was back, that he remembered; he remembered her, them, and she wanted nothing more than to look into his eyes and hold on to him forever.

"Where are you?" she asked, when she managed to find her voice.

"Right behind you."


	37. Chapter 36

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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><p>You touched these tired eyes of mine,<br>and mapped my face out, line by line,  
>and somehow growing old feels fine.<br>I listen close, for I'm not smart.  
>You wrap your thoughts in works of art<br>and they're hanging on the walls of my heart.

I may not have the softest touch,  
>I may not say the words as such,<br>and though I may not look like much,  
>I'm yours.<br>Though my edges may be rough,  
>I never feel like quite enough.<br>It may not seem like very much,  
>but I'm yours.<p>

You healed these scars over time,  
>you braced my soul, you love my mind.<br>You're the only angel in my life.  
>The day news came my best friend died<br>my knees went weak and you saw me cry.  
>Said I'm still the soldier in your eyes.<p>

I may not have the softest touch,  
>I may not say the words as such,<br>and though I may not look like much,  
>I'm yours.<br>Though my edges may be rough,  
>I never feel I'm quite enough.<br>It may not seem like very much,  
>but I'm yours.<p>

**(I'm yours - The Script)**

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><p><strong>36<strong>

The answer came both from her cell and from behind her. Her heart stopped and her breath got caught in her throat as she turned around, finding herself face to face with the most amazing, beautiful set of midnight blue eyes, filled with nothing but pure love as he smiled to her.

"Space Boy?" she asked; her voice low and trembling.

"There's my beautiful angel," he said, in a soft, loving whisper; his smile never leaving his features. "Hey, Windy."

She chuckled and gasped and cried, all at once, and threw herself at him, encircling her arms around his neck. She let her fingers buried in his hair, softly and lovingly caressing his scalp, nuzzling her face against his neck and breathing him in, crying, gasping, sobbing, not willing to let go as she felt his hands going around her waist; loving fingers getting under her jacket and gently caressing her back through the material of her shirt, holding her close as she cried in his arms.

"I thought I lost you," she gasped into his hear, tightening her grip around his neck and shoulders to assured herself she wasn't dreaming, that he was real and he was there. And he was hers.

"I know, I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm here now," he assured her, gently taking her hands in his and breaking the embrace just enough to make her look at him. "I'm here."

She punched him.

She pouted and sniffed and then just punched him on the chest with both hands. But before he could stumble backwards, she pulled from the collar of his jacket, crushing him back against her and hanging herself off his neck once more, holding him close.

And he laughed. He actually had the nerve to laugh, encircling his arms around her waist again and returning the embrace. His chest and shoulders vibrating against her as he did so, and she chuckled despite herself, not willing to let go of his neck just yet.

"I missed you, you stupid alien," she said, chocking in her own words.

He tightened his hold around her waist, burying his nose on her neck. "I missed you too, babe," he whispered, gently kissing the spot right under her earlobe. "And I love you, so much…"

She closed her eyes then, sobbing softly. And when he pulled away, just enough to cup her cheeks, she kept her eyes closed a moment longer before finally opening them, drowning in the depths of his blue eyes.

"I love you," he whispered again, softly, sultry, truthfully, as he caressed her cheeks with his thumbs, gently wiping her tears away.

She gasped, nodding her head. "I love you too," she whispered back, right before his lips took hers in a kiss.

And she returned it, eagerly. Opening her mouth, she welcomed his kiss, meeting his tongue with her own in a slow, loving dance. Like so many times before, like the first time, they kissed, pouring everything into it and melting into one another.

.-.

Some guard looking for someone or another interrupted them. After the tears dried, they found themselves out again; drinks and a few laughs were shared with people around, a few pictures here and there, and an early departure.

They made it into the black car, either if it was the same as before or not, it didn't matter, as it made the way out the metropolitan area and into the residential area they lived in. The trip was made in a comfortable silence as he rested against the back of the car with her head resting on his chest. One arm wrapped around her shoulders, the other holding her hand, fingers intertwined and softly caressing one another. And when the car finally pulled into their driveway, they said their thanks and goodbyes to the chauffer, making the way inside fast to escape the cold night air.

Kalina received them happily barking and jumping up to them, and he bent down to pet her head, happy to finally be home. But it wasn't until the dog walked away, happy to have him back and just as happy to get back to her nap under the coffee table and the blonde moved to take her jacket off when he grabbed her by the wrist, making her turn to him. And before she could even blink, he kissed her.

It wasn't demanding. But it was intense; fierce and slow and deep, and filled with all the need and the longing and the desire bottled up and barely satisfied two nights ago.

She moaned into the kiss, arching her body towards him and welcoming his advances, and that alone was enough to undo him.

God, he had missed her, so much…

"I love you," she whispered huskily against his lips.

He didn't answer. Instead, he crushed his lips against hers once more, letting his mouth, his tongue, his running hands across her back and hips say the words for him as she took her jacket off, throwing it away. His own jacket soon followed, thrown forgotten on the floor.

Pushing her against the wall, somehow still managing to be gentle, he pressed himself against her long, slender frame, bucking his hips against hers and silencing the throaty moan she made with his mouth. His hands were in her hair, keeping her there as he brushed against her; one long leg wrapped around his hips, welcoming him, and her own hands were on his wrists for a moment, keeping him there as well, before she grew tired of the clothes separating them.

Impatient fingers fought with his shirt and tie, taking care of them and pealing him off them in no time. Letting her run across his chest for a moment, enjoying the feeling of her long, slender fingers over his nipples, he took care of her shirt, opening it up and admiring the way the skin tone bra hugged her breasts, full and round and rising up and down with her agitated breathing.

Cupping her breasts with both hands, teasing the already hardening nipples through the material of her laced bra, he captured her lips once more as another moan escaped her. And when she tilted her face up, pulling away from the kiss and in need of air, he took the opportunity to let his lips fall down her neck, nibbling and kissing and sucking the spot right over her accelerating pulse, as his hands made it to her shoulders and then down her arms, pushing the shirt off her.

Freeing her breasts from their prison, he unhooked her bra. Following the white material to the floor, Seiya let his lips go down and in between round breasts, licking all over the small, pink nipples and entertaining himself with those creamy breasts, licking and sucking, first one, then the other, noticing they were starting to grow with her pregnancy. And how much more sensitive they were, he noted, as her husky moans would reach his ears at the softest of brushes with his tongue.

Her hands made it to his hair, inviting, and he went down again, kissing the trembling stomach. On his knees and with both hands resting at the side of her hips now, he stopped and looked at the spot right under her bellybutton and her slightly swollen belly, unable to suppress the proud, loving smile from coming to his lips as he kissed the spot softly, reverently.

Her hands were still on his head, long fingers brushing his hair and scalp, and he looked up and into those marvelous green eyes of hers as she smiled down to him.

He kissed her belly, right over the spot he knew their baby was growing, safely wrapped inside Haruka's womb. Caressing the spot with his lips, gently kissing it, he looked up and into her eyes again; the small, unbelievably happy smile returning to his lips.

Words were not needed. He could see it in her eyes, undisguised and as strong as ever, just as he knew she could see it in his, like so many times before. Still, the words left his lips in a soft, sensual whisper; his heart dancing in resonating joy at the look of happiness in her soft, beautiful features.

"I love you."

She cupped his face with her hands then, gently guiding him towards her. And as he made the way up, he put his hands on her legs, lifting her up. Her legs encircled themselves around his waist, and he separated them from the wall, making the way to the stairs.

Her lips on his neck, sucking the spot right under his earlobe distracted him momentarily, and he used the landing on the stairs to stop. Not letting her down, still tightly wrapped around him, he pushed her against the wall, rubbing his hard erection against her and making them both moan at the contact, despite their clothes separating them.

And she moved in response, bucked her hips against him, needy and beautiful and breathtaking.

Capturing her lips with his, he plunged his tongue inside her mouth as he sneaked a hand in between their pressed bodies. He caressed her through her pants, loving the way she arched her back, welcoming the touch, and the way she trembled and moaned, deeply and huskily, when he sneak his hand inside her pants, caressing her wetness.

.-.

She growl in disappointment and disapproval the moment he retreated his fingers, and she took his hand in hers with all the intention of guiding it back where she needed it.

"No, wait," he said, freeing his hand and breaking the heated kiss.

"What?" she asked, sounding a bit harsher than she intended to. But, damn it, she really needed his hand back where it was…

He chuckled, obviously amused at her current state. "I'm forgetting something," he said, as her deposited back on the floor and on her own two feet, stepping away from her. "For a change…"

She blinked, completely lost. Fear settling deep in her stomach and her heart at his words, but the light in his eyes, those deep, loving eyes, shook it away, melting it the moment it came, leaving her just confused.

And he just smiled at her, pecking her lips. "Just wait here for a sec," he instructed. "It's in my jacket."

She blinked again, having no idea what he was talking about and could possibly be so important that it couldn't wait until later.

"Just wait here," he said again. "You just… stay here... don't move."

With that, he jumped the way off the stairs, leaving her standing there, blinking and frowning as she followed him with her eyes. She saw him retreating his own steps, going for the jacket she had previously discarded and searching on its pockets. But when he looked up at her, he seemed to change his mind and, taking the jacket with him, he made his way back to the stairs.

He looked at her, his smile vanishing for a moment as he placed his jacket over her. Numbly, she took it, holding it against her and covering her naked breasts, arching a questioning eyebrow.

"You're distracting," he simply stated.

"Oh, yeah?" she asked, again arching an eyebrow at him, this time challenging, as she let the jacket drop to the floor.

He let out a sigh, shaking his head and chuckling before picking the jacket up. "Fine, if you want it to be this way," he said. "But just for the record, I wanted to do this right."

"I'm pretty sure you were on the right track…"

He chuckled. "No, not that," he said, giving her a way too small, way too short kiss for her liking. "You teasing little minx."

"Minx?"

"Like I said," he began, slightly raising his voice just enough to make her shut up, "I wanted to do this right," he said again. "I even asked your father first," he said, confusing her even more. "I was planning on doing this on Christmas," he continued, with a sided, somewhat nervous smile dancing in his lips now, "but then… you know… I forgot about it and…" he trailed off for a moment, taking something out of his jacket's pocket. "Hope you don't mind the delay," he finished, showing her a small, black velvet box.

She looked at it and then up at him, blinked, and then looked down at the box. The part about asking her father first linking to the box and making sense as an idea crossed her mind, but she shook it away, looking up at him again, opening and closing her mouth a couple of times but with no real words escaping her as she just stared at him.

He smiled, shaking his shoulder somewhat shyly. And positively adorable.

"Not many people get the chance to do things all over again," he said, still smiling shyly and a bit nervous. "But I did. I got that chance, and you're the only woman on the entire universe that could make me fall in love with her twice," he stated, lovingly cupping her cheek with one hand and smiling when she tilted her head towards it, welcoming the caress. "And if I wasn't sure before, which I was," he said, as his eyes went wide and big, raising one long finger to make a point. "I totally was."

She chuckled at that, numbly nodding her head. Her heart was racing in her chest, her lips were suddenly trembling, and a nervous smile mirroring Seiya's came to her lips.

"Just so you know," he joked, tilting his head. "I was sure before, and I sure as hell am now," he continued, now smiling up to her with nothing but pure love shining in his eyes. "I love you, Haruka. With all my heart," he whispered, as again, that nervous smile of his came back to his lips.

"I love you too, Seiya," she whispered back, raising up a hand and gently caressing his cheek.

He took her hand, kissing it lovingly. "I know, just… let me say this," he asked. "I can't believe I'm this nervous," he joked, shaking his head and chuckling despite himself.

She chuckled too, covering her trembling lips with both hands as moisture started filling her eyes when he went down on one knee, smiling up to her.

"You're the love of my life, the mother of my child," he continued, gently caressing her belly as he said that. And she covered his hand with one of her own, smiling nervously, incredulously. "You're the one for me, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you," he finished, slowly retreating his hand off her stomach only to open up the small black box he still held in his other hand, revealing a small ring.

And not just any ring; a diamond ring. A white gold, simple, beautiful solitaire ring.

And as the meaning of it, of everything he was saying drawn to her, she gasped. Her vision became blurred and she blinked a few times, fighting the tears away and not once taking her eyes off those blue ones.

"Oh my God…"

"For the past three and a half years you've made me the happiest man ever alive," he said, giving her that loving, radiant smile of his, only half assured as he looked up at her. "And I would love to spend the rest of my life making you happy, showing you how much I love you," he said, taking her hand in his as his voice trembled with emotion and nervousness. "So, Haruka... would you marry me?"

She gasped. "Oh my God…"

He chuckled then, shrinking his shoulders. "I kind of need a yes or no answer, here…"

She chuckled too, nodding her head as the tears she had been trying to fight finally came to her eyes. "Oh my God, yes!" she exclaimed, getting down on her knees herself and encircling her arms around him. "Yes, yes, yes!" she whispered, kissing him over and over again, laughing and crying and gasping.

He chuckled, returning the embrace and letting out a relieved sigh and tightening his hold around her for a moment before pulling away. Taking the ring off its box and looking up at her, smiling softly and lovingly as his own eyes were now filled with unshed tears of pure happiness, he took her hand in his, sliding the diamond on her ring finger.

She looked at it, at how the small rock caught the lights coming from outside in it, at how small and simple and beautiful it was and how it looked on her long, slender finger, and she chuckled again. The sound resembling a gasp as she looked up at him.

He tossed the box off over his shoulder and she laughed, closing her eyes as he cupped her face with his hands; his thumbs caressing her cheeks. Biting on her lower lip, a blush came to her cheeks as she gazed into those blue eyes of his and he smiled to her, lovingly brushing their noses together.

"Marry me," he whispered, softly, lovingly, sultry against her lips.

She nodded; her smile widening just as he moved to capture her lips with his. Encircling her arms around his neck, she arched her back, getting closer to him when his hands made it around her waist. The contact of her naked breasts against him, her nipples brushing his bare, strong chest making them both moan softly into the kiss.

But before the kiss could turn more passionate, he broke it off. Getting up and then helping her get up as well, and before she could voice any protest, he lifted her up, taking her in his arms.

Haruka yelp in surprise at the sudden movement, hanging herself from his neck for balance and then narrowing her eyes when he just laughed.

"You could have warned me," she pointed out, punching his chest.

"Where's the fun in that?" he retorted, chuckling lightly as he made the way to their bedroom.

Stepping in, he deposited her in the middle of the bed and then straightened himself up. Looking at her, letting his eyes wander through her long, half naked body, that teasing, satisfied, completely sexual smile came to his lips as he put his hands on his hips.

"Now, where were we?"

Propping herself up with her elbows, she raised one foot up, leisurely caressing his groin, teasingly, as she looked up at him, both welcoming and challenging.

He followed through. Getting in all fours over the mattress, he crawled his way up, kissing her stomach first, the valley in between her breasts, and then he entertained himself with her neck, sending a delicious tremor down her spine.

Encircling arms and legs around him, she tilted her head to a side, welcoming his invading lips. A throaty gasp escaping her when he started bucking his hips against her, reminding her of the annoying clothing still separating them. But before she could guide her hands down to take care of his pants, he moved off and away, going down again. His mouth enclosed around one nipple, and she moaned and gasped as he teased the hardening mud, nibbling, sucking, licking; driving her mad in pure desire with every flick of his tongue as a knowing hand played with her other breast.

.-.

_(edited! To read, go to florlolasfics dot blogspot dot com dot ar)_

Her tears came before he could fully recover.

And he let her cry. Knowing her, it was probably the first time she allowed herself to cry, to really cry and let it all out for longer than barely a few minutes. It wasn't a desperate cry; silent, heartbreaking, she was finally letting everything out; the pain, the confusion, the loneliness, the longing. And the relief, he guessed, as she curled herself right next to him, face half under his chest, when he laid himself down next to her, holding her close as she cried in his arms; the smell of sex fresh in the air.

Her tears broke his heart, but he let her cry, knowing she probably needed to get it all out.

He didn't know how much time it passed, and he didn't care. He just laid there, on his side and with Haruka's long body curled next to him, loving the feeling of her, of her warm, soft skin, and gently caressing her back and arm, soothingly.

"I'm sorry I hurt you," he finally said, when her body stopped shaking with silent tears and he heard her sniffling softly.

She nuzzled her face against his neck, encircling one long arm around his waist and keeping the other under her chin, caressing his chest. "It's ok," her voice, husky and muffled, reached his ears.

Cupping her chin with in one hand, he gently tilted her face up to make her look up at him. Her eyes were red and puffy and still of a clear green, and he frowned. Rationally, he knew nothing of what had happened had been his fault, but still; just because he didn't hurt her on purpose it didn't meant it was ok.

But before he could say anything, she smiled.

It was a soft, small smile. Shy and beautiful and sided, as she looked up at him placing both her hands under her chin. "I'm pregnant," she announced.

He chuckled. "I know," he said, nodding his head and returning the smile. "I remember."

"Yeah, but…" she trailed off, shaking her shoulder. "I never told you. You just found out…" she explained. "Eight years ago you. I'm telling _you_ now."

His smile got wider then, softer.

Kissing her forehead, he silently and gently pushed her back so that she was laying on her back. Looking into her eyes for a moment, he let his hand slid down to her slightly swollen stomach. He had no idea what a ten weeks pregnant belly was supposed to look like, and if it weren't for the fact that he knew she had usually a perfectly flat, strong stomach, he would have never guessed.

Well, that, and that pull he could feel. And unlike the first time he had felt it, he knew where it was coming from; it was their baby.

She placed her hand on top of his over her stomach, and the glimpse of the ring now decorating Haruka's finger took his breath away. He could have sworn his heart melted right then and there; his heart was so filled with love and happiness, he wondered if it would explode any second now.

"We're having a little Space Baby," Haruka stated, softly and rather proudly. Love and amazement pouring into her words despite the teasing statement.

And he laughed.

Taking her hand in his, he guided it to his lips, kissing it softly. "I love you, Haruka," he whispered softly, kissing the palm of her hand when she moved it to cup his cheek.

"I love you too, Seiya," she whispered back, tilting her face up and towards him.

And he welcomed the kiss, returning it and deepening it. Following when she encircled her arms around him and half laying on top of her, he let himself be carried away right into the wanders of Haruka's arms and body and love.

And as the night grew old, they gifted each other with kisses and caresses. Moans and gasps filling the room and he let himself get lost to her, with her.

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><p><strong>Coming soon:<strong> "If it weren't for the fact that I'm carrying your child and it would take me forever to get out of this tub, I would kick your ass."


	38. Chapter 37

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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**Juuhachi18:** this story _is_ a sequel. And no, there won't be any more sequels on this one. Maybe another, completely new Haruka-Seiya story, but this one's about done.

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><p><strong>37<strong>

He walked in, closing his eyes in appreciation. One of the up sides of having a pregnant woman in the house, was that it was always cool. A little too cool sometimes, bordering on freezing, but he had discovered it was best to throw a sweater on than to argue with her…

The lack of the usual happy bark welcoming him surprised him, and he frowned, taking a look around. The place was empty, and there were no signs of Kalina anywhere. And he would have thought there was no one home if it weren't for the faint music that reached his ears.

Following the sound, he made his way upstairs and into their bedroom. An amused smile coming to his lips when he recognized the music as one of Michiru and Haruka's duet. It was a little something they had recently discovered; whenever the baby insisted on playing soccer with mommy's stomach, the sound of a piano was enough to put it to sleep again. Usually, she would lock herself up in the music room and play for a little while, but apparently, today she had had a better idea.

Kalina's blue eyes looked up at him as he walked into the bathroom, long tail wagging happily but otherwise not making a sound. And he smiled at that, satisfied, and he turned to look at the bathtub. And there, covered in bubbles, his wife had yet to notice his arrival.

His wife. He was still getting used to that. And it still amazed him.

Never one to follow other people's expectations, and true to her own little tomboy self, she had been against a big, glamorous wedding. She had never been the white dress kind of girl after all, and he honestly didn't care much one way or another, as long as he got to spend the rest of his life with her.

It had been a bit hard to pick up a best man. He just couldn't chose between Yaten and Taiki, and he had to consider Mamoru as well; the first two were like brothers to him, and the Prince was his best friend. In the end, Mamoru had stepped aside, claiming either Yaten or Taiki would be more suitable for the position, and the three of them had ended up throwing a coin; not the best way to pick a best man, but it was the best way Seiya could think of without offending neither of them.

Theirs had been a small wedding. With Taiki as his best man and Michiru as Haruka's bridesmaid, Seiya's band members and Haruka's crew had been invited, along with their managers, to attend a small, simple ceremony with their friends and family. A small reception followed, and then a short though romantic little getaway to a small cabin up the mountains as a honeymoon.

It had been five months already, and still, the idea amazed him. And the sight of the rings decorating her finger -the engagement one he had given to her, and the simple gold band that matched the one on his own finger- still took his breath away.

And there she was now, with the bubbles up to her neck. She held a book in one hand as her free hand was leisurely and tenderly going up and down her rather pronounced, eight months pregnant belly.

The music helped relax the baby, while the bath helped relieve her back. The bubbles and smelling salts, he guessed, were just to add to the relaxing effect and a little extra to her little lazy moment.

Resting a shoulder against the marble wall, he cleared his throat, making his presence known.

Green eyes blinked up at him and a smile made it to her lips, welcoming. "Hey," she greeted, as a thoughtful frown made it to her features and her eyes went back to her book. "What do you think of Kenta?" she asked, as she flipped the pages of her book until she reached a marked one.

So, baby names. That's what she was readying.

They had both agreed on not wanting to find out the baby's gender until it was born. She wanted it to be a surprise and he indulged her, but they had yet to come up with a name; they seemed to never agree on that…

He considered it for a moment, when a flash of green eyes and a mop of jet black hair came to his mind. Barely visible but there, and he smiled, sitting down on the floor next to the bathtub and resting his forearms on the edge.

"I like it," he conceded. "But it's a girl."

"How do you know?"

He had long ago discarded the idea of telling her about a half remembered dream of a little girl. It was probably just that, anyway. Specially considering Kakyuu's presence there as well; there was just no way his dead Princess and his unborn child could magically visit him in dreams. And yet, he couldn't shake the feeling off. He couldn't really explain it; he just knew it was a girl.

"I just do," he said, shaking a shoulder.

Green eyes narrowed at him then. "Have you been talking to Setsuna behind my back?"

He chuckled. "No," he answered, shaking his head.

"Because she won't say shit to me…"

Yes, they had both agreed on wanting it to be a surprise. But that didn't stop his wife from asking questions to the Guardian of Time. Though Seiya had the not so slight suspicion Haruka did that only to annoy the olive skinned woman…

With her eight months pregnancy, there wasn't much for the racer to do, after all.

"And what exactly makes you think she would say _anything_ to me?" he retorted.

She tilted her head, shaking a shoulder. "You have a way of getting what you want."

He smiled at that. "Only if it's from you, and after a few bed-tricks," he teased, as his smile turned sultrier. "And an orgasm or two," he added, reaching out a hand and caressing her huge belly, and then sliding it down.

She slapped his hand off before it could reach its destination, dangerously narrowing her eyes at him. "I resent the way you just implied I'm so easy."

"Easy?" he repeated, shaking his head. "No, there's nothing easy about you," he stated, going back to her belly. "Mommy is a very, very complex woman," he said into it, smiling widely as he looked up at her. "Please note I said 'complex', not 'complicated'."

"Nice save," she granted, though she still slapped his forehead. "If it weren't for the fact that I'm carrying your child and it would take me forever to get out of this tub, I would kick your ass," she stated, in a matter of fact tone. "You're changing the subject!"

He laughed. "I just know, ok?" he said, shrinking his shoulders. "It's a girl."

"How can you be so sure?"

Again, the image of a small girl with his black hair and Haruka's eyes flashed through his mind, and he couldn't help the smile that came to his lips. "Call it a hunch."

"Ok, fine!" she exclaimed, rolling her eyes as she went back to her book, flipping through the pages again. "Kimiko, then," she proposed. "Or, how about Mitsuko?"

He considered them for about half a second, before shaking his head. "We don't even know her yet," he pointed out. "How do you know it'd be the right name for her?"

"You're being impossible!"

"I'm just saying…"

She took a deep breath then, massaging her temple, and it wasn't hard for Seiya to know, she was losing her patience.

That was another side effect of her pregnancy. Though usually she had a very good control over her temper, lately, and with her hormones multiplying and going crazy on her, she was far more sensitive than normal, and the end result of that was her either getting extremely angry, or in tears, all, over the smallest of things.

He had heard enough scary stories about crazy pregnant women from pretty much every man he had came across in the last eight months. But lucky for him, her little pregnant tantrums never lasted long and weren't an often thing; she made an effort not to explode on him and in return, he tried not to annoy her more than necessary -it wouldn't be them if he didn't annoy her at all, at least a little bit-, and tried his best not to roll along with her whenever her hormones took over.

And he also made an effort not to point that out to her, either. He had learnt not to say anything about her hormones the first and last time he did so; a flying cup missing his head by merely an inch and his fast reflex kicking in had taught him so.

So, he just let her ramble on, yelling and even going ballistic, knowing it wouldn't last her long if he just ignored her, not encouraging her fighting spirit. And, of course, as he had also learned, she would feel bad about it later on, and a rather nice kiss and make up session would follow.

All in all, he considered himself lucky; having his wife pregnant was not as bad as everyone else made it to be.

"We _have_ to find a name," she pointed out, glaring at him.

"_Auntie Kakyuu says you'll know after I'm out of mommy's belly."_

The voice, sweet, melodic, and somewhat distant came to his mind, and he smiled again.

If he was right, then he would find the right name then, and only then. If he wasn't…

"Tell you what," he said, standing up and removing his t-shirt. "If I'm right and it's a girl, I'll pick it up," he proposed, taking his pants off. "When she's born."

She arched a questioning eyebrow at that. "And if you're wrong?" she asked, doing as she was silently asked and moving forward when he placed his hands on her shoulders, making room for him to get in the tub with her.

"You can pick whatever name you want," he said, nodding towards her baby names book. "I won't complain."

One blonde eyebrow went up at that, mockingly. "Not even if I name him Pikachu?"

He glared at her. "You wouldn't."

"Maybe I will," she said, throwing her nose up in the air, challenging, although the teasing light in her eyes betrayed her. "Or maybe I'll name him Akashiseisaburou."

"What?" he asked, blinking. "That's not a real name."

"Yes it is," she argued. "It's right here," she said, pointing at the almost unpronounceable name on the page. "It kind of makes up for such a short surname, don't you think?"

He rolled his eyes, chuckling despite himself. "Fine, whatever you want," he granted, knowing she was only mocking him anyway and trusting she wouldn't pick a ridiculous name for their baby. Taking the book off her hand, he threw it away. "Promise I won't complain."

She hummed at that, resting her head on his shoulder and tilting her face up in a thoughtful manner.

"Deal," she finally agreed.

He smiled then, kissing the spot right under her earlobe. And when she sighed in appreciation, tilting her head to a side and welcoming his lips' touch, he couldn't help himself; he let his hands go around her and cupping her breasts, large with her pregnancy, as he felt himself growing hard.

Being attracted to her was no novelty. She was a very beautiful, very sexual woman. But there was just something about her…

Although he had heard some women were against having sex during pregnancy -either because they were just not in the mood, or because they had self body image issues-, his wife was just not among those women. Her sex drive had been incredibly high during the first trimester, to the point where even the slightest of touches would fire her up. And he had enjoyed it immensely, jumping at every opportunity and exploring her changing, highly sensitive body.

Her sex drive was still revved up, and she was still sensitive all over. But this far along in the pregnancy, and although she was a very flexible woman, she was now bigger and heavier, and moving easily was just not possible. And while they had had their fair of fun trying on different positions during her first trimester, lately, he had found it was easier and more comfortable for her to either be in top, or to lay on her side as he spooned her, having her moaning out his name and twisting just to kiss him as he entertained himself with her back and neck and shoulder. Which turned their love making less frenzy and more affectionate, sweetened, and though a part of him sometimes missed the wild, insatiable woman that would do with him as she pleased, he welcomed every opportunity to admire and kiss and touch the pregnant, beautiful naked woman as she trembled at his every touch.

He found no need to lie whenever one of her hormonal girly moments -as he secretly called them- would attack her. Yes, her face was rounded now, her arms and legs not as slender, her hips wider. But Seiya was sure, she had never looked more beautiful.

Sometimes he wondered if there was something wrong with him. But the sight of a very pregnant, very naked Haruka with that expression of rapture all over her rounded, flushed face was just incredibly sensual and arousing.

"When should we stop doing this?" he asked, brushing his thumbs against hardening nipples as he wondered if she could balance herself up with the help of the edge of the tub, the water and himself doing the rest.

"Labor," she answered, making him laugh against her neck, tickling her.

She arched her back, raising up a hand and placing it behind his neck and tilting her face up to him. And he cupped her chin, going for the silently asked kiss, when a painful gasp escaped her lips; a wince came to her face as her hands flung to her belly, and Seiya knew, baby had different plans.

He smiled then, gently rubbing her belly. His smile widening when one small little foot made contact with his hand, meeting his touch.

And kicking Haruka rather strongly while at it.

"You better start looking for little leagues," she said, groaning lowly when the baby kicked her again rather strongly. "I don't care if it's a boy or a girl. We're signing this little fella," she said, pointing at her belly, "up for the soccer team."

He laughed at that, sliding both hands around her belly. And when the baby kicked again, gentler this time, his smile widened. It felt more as if the baby was moving around than actually kicking now, and he watched, fascinated, as Haruka's huge belly moved.

He always went to every doctor appointment with Haruka, he had been there for every ultrasound and test the doctor had wanted to run, and he had read more than just a few books and searched the net all over. He knew the baby's organs were now fully developed except for the lungs, that it could now fully hear, which was why it responded to stimuli such as caresses, music, and their own voices. He knew the baby had around the weight it was going to be born with, and he also knew the little one was soon growing out of room to move around, which also meant more painful kicks.

He knew all the facts, and still, it never stopped to amaze him.

When the baby finally calmed down and stopped moving around, she let out a relieved sigh, resting her head on his shoulder and closing her eyes.

"Your _daughter_ is being extremely hyperactive today," she complained. "There's no way I'm letting her waste such a talent."

He laughed despite the way she just accentuated the word daughter, not really caring and not at all offended by her mocking. Instead, he just kept on soothingly and tenderly caressing her belly.

"Easy, now," he said, smiling widely when the baby moved again.

Slower and gentler now, but Seiya could still see it moving around. And when Haruka pointed out a spot to her side, he caressed it gently, feeling the rounded little bulged his wife had just pointed out as their baby's head.

"Be nice with mommy," he said, gently patting her belly, and chuckling when the baby moved again in response.

"You're not helping if you keep doing that," she pointed out, nowhere near as annoyed as she was pretending to be.

"Alright, how about this?" he said, before clearing his throat.

Resting his cheek against Haruka's blonde head, he let his hands gently travel along her belly, caressing the spot he knew the baby was currently resting on, and, closing his eyes, he started singing. Low and softly, masterly keeping his tune, he sang an old lullaby he remembered from his childhood.

Small, curious little hands brushed his own through Haruka's skin, and he smiled as he opened his eyes. Returning the caress, he kept on singing in Kinmoku's ancient language, noticing how both his wife and his unborn baby started relaxing to his song.

He felt her long body relaxing against his own in the water. With her hands on top of his as he gently caressed her belly, he smiled when he finished his song and she let out a soft, content sigh.

"Better?" he asked, slightly tilting his head to look at her face.

Her eyes were closed. "Mhm," she hummed, slightly nodding her head as a smile made it to her lips.

With the baby so active today, finding every new opportunity to kick and move around, sex was not really an option. But that didn't mean they couldn't share a nice and still private moment.

Deciding that the things he had to do could wait until later, he relaxed in the tub, not letting go of the woman in his arms.

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><p><strong>A.N.: <strong>I was going to make this a long one chap along with the one that's coming up, but it was getting too long. And quite confusing. So I split it up.

Next chap should be up soon enough, so stay tuned!

**Coming next on "Remember me?":** "I refuse to spend the next couple of centuries hearing you complain about missing your child's birth because you forgot to bring your cellphone with you."


	39. Chapter 38

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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><p>Something in your eyes makes me wanna lose myself,<br>makes wanna lose myself in your arms.  
>There's something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast.<br>Hope this feeling lasts the rest of my life.

If you knew how lonely my life has been  
>and how long I've been so alone.<br>If you knew how I wanted someone to come along  
>and change my life the way you've done.<p>

Feels like home to me. It feels like home to me.  
>Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from.<br>Feels like home to me. It feels like home to me.  
>Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong.<p>

A window breaks down a long dark street  
>and a siren wails in the night.<br>But I'm alright, 'cause I have you here with me  
>and I can almost see, through the dark there is light.<p>

If you knew how much this moment means to me  
>and how long I've waited for your touch.<br>And if you knew how happy you are making me,  
>I never thought that I'd love anyone so much.<p>

Feels like home to me. It feels like home to me.  
>Feels like I'm all the way back where I come from.<br>Feels like home to me. It feels like home to me.  
>Feels like I'm all the way back where I belong.<p>

**(Feels like home - Edwina Hayes)**

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><p><strong>38<strong>

He walked out of the store, guitar case in hand after having the strings changed, lowly and mindlessly whistling to himself as he put his sunglasses on.

The sun was being particularly merciless today, but he didn't mind. The fitting summer khaki pants were light enough, and though the dark gray t-shirt might had been a bad idea, for it was concentrating all the sun's heat on his chest, he didn't really mind; the apartment was only a few blocks away, and though he knew Haruka was busy with the girls, the autopilot of the air conditioner kept the place nice and cool twenty four seven.

It was something they had decided a couple of months ago, momentarily moving to the apartment. It was in the middle of the city, and therefor closer to the hospital; driving around full speed was Haruka's thing, but considering her huge pregnant belly and the state she would be in when going into labor, that was just not an option. And although he thought of himself as a man of many talents, driving around at such a speed without putting himself or anyone else in danger was just not one of those. And he was sure he lacked the cold mind to concentrate on the task of meeting the distance between their house on the suburbs and the hospital without going mad with anxiety and nervousness, and maybe hitting a driver or two in the process…

A shorter distance, he could manage. So, moving to the apartment seemed like the better, wiser option. And it was big and comfortable enough for the both of them, and though Kalina didn't have the backyard to go and lay herself out in the sun, she did have a wide balcony, and a nice coffee table for her to hide under.

"Fancy meeting you here," a female voice forced him out of his thoughts and he looked up, only to meet magenta eyes and a gentle smile dancing in the woman's lips.

"Setsuna, hi!" he greeted, smiling to the olive skinned woman.

"Care for a walk?" she said, as she pointed the way he had been going to and smiled.

"Sure," he agreed, as he started walking again, this time with the dark green haired woman beside him. "So, what brings you here?" he asked, knowing the woman was not one to go out in the middle of the afternoon, on a very sunny day in the middle of July unless absolutely necessary.

She smiled at that, reaching up a hand and showing him a shopping bag. And when he just blinked at it, she reached inside it, pulling out a white hooded baby towel trimmed with little baby frogs drawings.

"I know you already have everything for the little one," she said, smiling sheepishly -a rather strange thing, Seiya noted-, "but I couldn't help myself."

He chuckled, nodding his head. "It's really cute."

"Oh, I know!" she exclaimed, in what could be considered as Setsuna's way of soughing in a cuteness attack as she reached the towel up to her chest, smiling widely.

Again, a rare thing coming from her. It was something he had started seeing quite often lately, from Setsuna, and from all the rest as well; with the baby's birth so close now, everyone was starting to get extremely excited.

And he knew, it was something he would see that much more often once the baby was born.

They reached the corner and, taking something out of her purse, Setsuna pointed at a parked car he recognized as hers and unlocked the doors. And when she gave him one of her knowing smiles, one dark green eyebrow going up, he frowned.

"See, I'm also here in my behalf," she announced. "With you being now a part of Endymion and Serenity's court and because of the Ginzuishou, you're going to live a very long life," she explained, going up to her car and opening the driver's door. "And I refuse to spend the next couple of centuries hearing you complain about missing your child's birth because you forgot to bring your cellphone with you."

He blinked at that, only now realized that he had, indeed, forgotten his cellphone back at the apartment.

Again, she arched an eyebrow his way. "Well?" she asked, pointing at the passenger's seat. "Are you coming or not?"

Blue eyes went wide opened at that. "You mean, _now_?" he asked, surprised out of his mind.

"Yes, now," she said, pointing once again at the empty space.

And that was all the confirmation he needed. He all but jumped around the car, opening the door and taking the passenger seat, a million different things running through his head.

It was too early; the due time was not for another two weeks, and the baby bag Haruka had put together and her own were back at the apartment. His cell was there was well, and he wondered if Haruka was unsuccessfully trying to reach him and if he would get yelled at for not picking up…

"It's normal for first mothers to deliver before or after their due time," she explained, as if reading his mind. "Don't worry, everything is perfectly fine."

He blinked. Well, if she said so…

He smiled then, tilting his head and looking at her. "That's why you're here, isn't it?" he asked, with an accusing tone, too excited to actually be anywhere near serious about it. "To assure I won't get stuck in traffic?" he said, pointing at the street; rush hour was just starting.

She smiled. "That, and I'm also saving Michiru's career."

.-.

"The paint is still fresh," Makoto was saying as she pointed out at the cream colored walls at the end of the room. "But once it's dry, there will be some beautiful paintings that were donated for the cause," she finished, smiling widely to the aquamarine haired woman standing next to her.

Michiru smiled, nodding her head. "You are very welcome."

After saving for a really long time, and an even longer time spent consulting it with her pillow, Makoto had finally decided to follow her dream. Buying her own space was not an option for now, and she had stubbornly and strongly declined any help on that area, so she had decided to rent it instead, putting up her own restaurant.

It was small and cozy, with a large, wooden counter display were she would be showing her specialty; pastries and treats.

Chairs and tables had already been placed, but she was still waiting for the tablecloth and matching napkins she had ordered. Glasses and plates of all sized had been delivered as well, still waiting on the boxes they had arrived in for the wooden shelves to be placed and displayed right behind the counter.

All in all, it was really nice, and she knew, her brunette friend would turn her little business into a success in no time.

"Looks really nice," the blonde standing next to her said, approvingly nodding her head.

And massaging her waist and back, Michiru noted.

To say Haruka's belly was huge was the understatement of the century. She looked like she was about to explode any minute; the black cropped leggings and the v-neck line teal colored tunic doing absolutely nothing to hide her almost nine months pregnancy. She was thirty eight weeks along, and her belly was already low; Michiru knew the baby was coming any given moment now, and she had her reservations about her blonde friend being there at all. She was supposed to be resting, not parading around…

Rationally, she knew and understood there was nothing wrong with Haruka being out and about. She was a very active person and had been able to keep on running -granted, nowhere near as fast as she used to- and training up until a few months ago. She had taken all and every gym class that was recommended for pregnant women and had had, aside from the first two months, a very healthy, very happy pregnancy. And Seiya had been a very good, understanding partner -again, aside from the first few months-, going with her to every Lamaze class and doctor appointment and indulging her every craving, which was usually in the form of anything with cheese, and very late at night.

Unable to run anymore because of her belly and all that additional weight, she still went out every morning and every night for a walk, when the heated sun wouldn't make the little excursion impossible, Kalina right at her side. Seiya went along with her every time as they both took their dog out for a walk in a little exercise that was needed for the dog and beneficial for the pregnant woman.

She knew all that. She had read all the books and did all the research, and, rationally, she knew it was perfectly ok for Haruka to do all those things as long as there were no complications and as long as her doctor allowed it. But still, Michiru thought that, now that the date was so close, the blonde should take things slow.

And that back pain she was silently dealing with right now just proved Michiru right.

"Would you at least sit down?" she said, pointing at one of the many empty chairs around.

The blonde waved her hand, dismissing her comment. "I'm fine," she simply stated, turning around and signaling for Makoto to lead the way into the kitchen; one hand still pressed against her lower back.

But as she did so, she tripped.

She yelped, bending forward a little as her hand flung to her belly. The other one going to grab a table for balance, knocking off the glass pitcher resting there in the process.

"Haruka!" Makoto exclaimed, jumping up and beside the blonde in no time. "You alright?"

Green eyes blinked up at them, once, before looking down on herself.

There was a large pool right under her gladiator sandal covered feet. And though the broken glass and the fresh lemonade that had been on the broken pitcher could explain that, Michiru couldn't help but notice the fact that Haruka's legs were completely soaked.

Green eyes looked up at her then, wide and opened, before a low, painful groan escaped the blonde and she doubled over.

"Oh, God!" she exclaimed, tightly grabbing Michiru's shoulder for support. "Holy shit, that hurts!"

Before she could fully react, Makoto beat her to it. Grabbing her by the arm and shaking her out of her stupor, the brunette's wide, happy green eyes looked at her.

"Baby time!"

.-.

True to herself and her own little old habits, she made it into the hospital in record time. Without bothering on asking at the reception desk, and not wanting to wait for the elevator, she went straight for the stairs, running her way up to the maternity floor. She all but tripped into the waiting room, thankful for the fresh air that welcomed her heated face after her long run.

Makoto, Hotaru and Taiki were occupying a set of chairs. She knew both Mamoru and Ami where somewhere around the hospital, and Minako had promised to pick up Rei before coming here.

Yaten looked quite occupied walking around in circles, right in front of the trio, and just like Taiki, he had his cellphone in hand. But unlike the tall brunette, the shorter man looked rather angry as he hung up his cellphone.

"Any news?" she asked, barely able to control her excitement.

Before anyone could ask, a loud yell coming from the general direction of the delivery rooms down the hall answered her question and she winced in sympathy at the rather painful sounding yell. But then she smiled again.

"This is so exciting!" she exclaimed, clapping her hands.

"Where the hell is he?"

Yaten sudden outburst as he waved his hands around in pure exasperation surprised her, and she blinked at him once, before taking another look around; only now noticing a few members of their gang were missing, though she probably didn't need to worry about a particular one…

"Where's Michiru?" she asked.

"Inside," Makoto answered, pointing at the hallway and the direction the screams had come from. "With Haruka."

She frowned at that, surprised. "And where's Seiya?"

Yaten growled. "That's what I'd like to know!"

.-.

"I can't do this, I can't do this," the panting blonde was mumbling, shaking her head. Her bangs were stuck to her sweated, reddened face as her hands frantically rubbed her belly. "Just drug me!" she begged, looking at her doctor.

"It's too late for that, Haruka," the doctor said. "You're gonna have to do this the old fashioned way."

The blonde whimpered, and she caressed her head soothingly. "It's alright, you can do this," she said, trying to sound as comforting as she could, hiding her own little panic attack.

"No, I can't!" the blonde exclaimed. "Where _is_ he?" she demanded, furious.

"He's on his way," she said, hoping that was really the case as another contraction attacked the blonde and she arched her back, half lifting herself off the bed. "Breathe, breathe," the violinist instructed, taking Haruka's hand.

Big mistake.

.-.

She parked the car and killed the engine. Looking at her wristwatch, she let out a sigh, turning to look at the man next to her.

"Alright, let's go," she said, getting off the car.

They made it to the reception area in no time, and she smiled when the silver doors of an elevator opened up.

"Right on time," she mumbled to herself, satisfied, as she gently pushed the black haired man inside with her.

She hummed to herself all the way up, secretly amused at Seiya, as the man kept on switching from one foot to another nervously. And when, finally, they made it to the maternity floor and before the doors would open, she smiled up to him.

"I would run if I were you."

.-.

"What kind of idiot leaves his cellphone when his wife is nine months pregnant?" Yaten asked, exasperated and to no one in particular.

"There he is!" Usagi exclaimed, pointing a finger at the end of the hallway as a perfectly relaxed looking Setsuna just appeared behind the elevator doors; a flash of black making it past her and out of the elevator in no time.

"Finally!" Yaten exclaimed.

Without even saying hello, and following the screams, Seiya made a mad run to the delivery room.

"Sorry for the delay," Setsuna apologized, smiling to them all as the singer disappeared behind a door, and she calmly made her way up to the rest of them. "I may have underestimated rush hour."

.-.

There was something in the air; a lingering feeling, a faded scent. But before his brain could even begin to process and recognize it, green eyes fell into his own. Her face was all blushed and sweated and a painful wince decorated her features as a contraction hit her.

"Seiya!" she screamed out, reaching up her hands to him.

Going to her side and taking Michiru's place by the bed, he barely noticed the relieved sigh the violinist let out, nursing the hand she had been holding Haruka's with before she quietly let the nurse guide her out of the room.

Haruka was fuming. "Where were you?" she demanded, raising a hand up with all the intention of hitting him, when a contraction stopped her from doing so, tightly grabbing his t-shirt instead.

"Ok, Haruka, this is it," Dr. Iseya announced. "I need you to push."

"Come on, baby," he encouraged, taking her hand and trying not to wince at the deadly tight hold she gave him. "You can do this."

"Now, push!"

"No, no, look at me," he instructed, cupping her chin and making her look at him when her eyes drifted to the doctor in between her legs. "Look at me," he said again.

She whined and gasped out in pain, and he held her hand tight as another contraction came.

"Alright, push!" the doctor urged.

She screamed out in pain, leaning forward and doing as she was told. And he held her hand tight, passing his other arm around her back and supporting her, and then gently rubbing her when she leaned against him, burying her face on his neck and taking a deep breath.

"God, it hurts!" she whined, shaking her head as she took a deep breath only to let it out in a whimper. "It really hurts!"

"Come on, babe," he said, making her look up at him again. "Where's that tough, cocky woman I married?" he asked, gifting her with a teasing smile, chuckling when she smiled through her pain, chuckling and sobbing and gasping, and tightening her already dead hold on his hand as yet another contraction came.

Dr. Iseya said something and he barely registered it, holding on to his wife as she pushed and grunted and gasped. And he did his best to support her, to let her know he was there for her, with her, barely able to imagine the amount of pain she was in.

"You're doing great, Haruka," the doctor said. "We're almost there."

"Breathe, baby, breathe."

"I need you to push real hard, one more time."

"Just get it out already!" Haruka yelled, right before another painful scream erupted from her throat and she pushed again.

It all happened too fast. Haruka's screaming, the doctor smiling up and the nurse rushing around and searching for something, and then giving it to the doctor. And then…

Blue eyes went wide and opened as a loud cry filled the room and he watched, dumbly, as Dr. Iseya wrapped the small, pink crying ball into a blanket.

"It's a girl," the doctor announced, smiling softly as she accepted whatever it was the nurse gave to her.

The blonde in his arms cried and gasped, and he watched as they cut the umbilical cord and cleaned the baby's nostrils. Once that was dealt with, they placed the baby in Haruka's waiting arms, and as he looked at his daughter for the first time, going to grab one small, tiny little hand, it finally hit him.

With that small little hand tightly grabbing his finger, he looked at the small bundle of life now gently curled in Haruka's arms and chest, and tears flooded his eyes as his brain was finally able to recognize that lingering scent in the air.

"Congratulations," Dr. Iseya said, smiling to them. "It's a beautiful baby girl."

He nodded, dumbly, amazed, out of breath. And when filled with happy tears eyes looked up at him, he smiled to her, caressing her cheek and kissing her lips before looking down at their baby again, completely taken by her.

"She's perfect," he mumbled, fascinated, as he caressed the little fingers wrapped around his own with his thumb. "I love you," he whispered against Haruka's forehead. "I love you both, so much."

Haruka gasped and chuckled, looking up at him. "I love you," she whispered back, not caring about the tears still rolling down her flushed face.

"What are you gonna name her?" the nurse asked, curiously.

He looked up at her and blinked, once, before looking down at his daughter again. And a proud, loving smile made it to his lips; his own tears cascading down his cheeks as he caressed his baby girl's head.

Olives.

It smelled like fresh olives.

"Yoshiko."

The name just escaped his lips, and Haruka looked up at him. Her eyes were filled with tears as she gasped and smiled beautifully, nodding her head before looking down on their daughter again.

"Her name is Yoshiko."

.

.

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><p><strong>McFleet:<strong> Question! you love me for this one coming to an end, or for the promise of another one coming sometime in the future? I thought it would be nice to describe Haruka's pregnancy, since readers spent the entire fic reading about her first cravings and her being all sensitive and emotional. And sad. I figured she deserved a happy pregnancy after everything I put her through, and now that her freaking alien is there with her to join her for the ride.  
>About the wedding… not the point of this story, and that's actually one of the main events on one of the possible arguments for a story I'm currently scheming in my head.<p>

**Haruka Minamino: **thank you for your kind words! And, rock-paper-scissors! I didn't even think of that! LOL!

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Epilogue coming real soon!

Yoshiko means fragrant child, by the way :)


	40. Epilogue

**Disclaimer: **all SM characters belong to Naoko Takeuchi. But I do own this story. If you like it, review it, fav it, bookmark it. But please don't steal it!

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* * *

><p>Everybody's looking for that something, one thing that makes it all complete.<br>You'll find it in the strangest places.  
>Places you never knew it could be.<br>Some find it in the face of their children.  
>Some find it their lover's eyes.<br>Who can deny the joy it brings,  
>when you've found that special thing<br>you're flying without wings.

Some find it sharing every morning.  
>Some in their solitary lives.<br>You'll find in the words of others;  
>a simple line can make you laugh or cry.<br>You'll find it in the deepest friendship.  
>The kind you cherish all your life.<br>And when you know how much that means,  
>you've found that special thing.<br>You're flying without wings.

So, impossible as they may seem,  
>you've got to fight for every dream.<br>'Cause who knows which one you let go  
>would have made you complete?<p>

Well, for me it's waking up beside you,  
>to watch the sun rise on your face.<br>To know that I can say 'I love you'  
>in any given time or place.<br>It's little things that only I know.  
>Those are the things that make you mine.<br>And it's like flying without wings,  
>'cause you're my special thing.<br>I'm flying without wings.

And you're the place my life begins  
>and you'll be where it ends,<br>I'm flying without wings.

**(Flying without wings - Westlife)**

* * *

><p><strong>Epilogue<strong>

He saw the car parking right outside. Another one followed, and he saw Makoto carrying what he could only guess was the brunette's latest piece of art.

Without bothering on looking who has come along with her, knowing they would all be there any minute now, he stepped away from the window.

He could hear Haruka waltzing around in the kitchen, and he knew everything was being taken care of. There was only one last thing.

He made his way to the living room, stopping right in the threshold that marked the beginning of the backyard, and looked outside. A soft, proud, filled with love and amazement smile made it to his lips as he saw his little girl sitting there, on her play mat, with her tobbles all around her as she stacked and un-stacked them; the shadow of their maple tree and her little white hat offering shelter from the sun, as a faithful Kalina laying right next to her offered company.

The moment Yoshiko was born, Kalina had abandoned her beloved spot under the coffee table. Instead, she could always be found wherever Yoshiko was; laying on the tiled floor when they gave her a bath, sitting next to her table chair when they fed her, or sleeping right next to the cradle in the nights.

On her own, Kalina had decided to be Yoshiko's faithful bodyguard. And she was immensely patient with the infant, not once acting on her when chubby little hands would pull a little too hard from her ears or her tail, and always ready and willing to lay down on her belly, letting those same chubby little hands run all over her back.

A soft breeze made the little hat fly off and away, making the soft mop of jet black hair dance around her head. And, frowning curiously, he saw as his little baby girl laughed and clapped her hands happily, looking up at something.

Which was, nothing at all.

And yet Yoshiko was giggling happily at something. And, whatever it was, Kalina seemed to be able to see it too, for the dog lifted up her face, tail lazily waging around a little.

Curiously, he stepped outside and made his way to his baby girl. A wave of nostalgia washing over him and shrinking his heart as he felt it; it was there, in the air all around, dancing and caressing his daughter's cheeks and playing with her hair.

And then a wide, proud smile came to his lips when a happy squeal welcomed him. Kalina barked to him as well, and he chuckled as a pair of small little arms extended up to him; chubby little hands clenching and unclenching, asking to be lifted up.

He complied, taking his daughter in his arms. "What are you laughing at, huh?" he asked, playfully and tenderly poking her nose, only for her to giggle more, throwing her little arms in the air and mumbling incoherently in her baby language.

The soft breeze blew again, caressing his cheeks, and he let out a sigh, looking around, hoping to see what his daughter was seeing, but knowing he wouldn't. He couldn't see it, but he knew it was there. And when he thought he saw a small fire butterfly fading in the air, he knew he was right.

Again, nostalgia washed over him. Pain, longing, and that heartbreaking sense of loss invaded him, with only the giggling girl in his arms saving him from drowning completely. And as he looked into her shining, happy eyes, as green as her mother's, those emeralds he loved so much, he knew, he may had lost everything once, but he had so much now…

Kissing his daughter's forehead, he reacomodated her in his arms, only to make her giggle again.

"Whatcha say, birthday girl?" he asked, playfully. "Ready to go in and say hi to your aunts?"

The only answer he got for that was another happy giggle as Yoshiko wrapped her little arms around his neck. And as he was ready to get back inside, he turned and look around one last time.

"Goodbye, Princess," he whispered into the air and that fading scent of fresh olives, just as Yoshiko waved her hand.

.-.

Red eyes watched as he stepped inside, carrying his daughter in his arms, and a soft sigh escaped ethereal lips.

"You shouldn't be here, Princess," she said to the slender, lone figure.

She didn't know exactly how she had managed to get here in the first place.

She knew certain events could cause the threshold between worlds to mix, creating a temporary vortex where worlds met. And she was well aware of the events of the past two years had been nothing short of life changing. But, though she could understand and sympathize with the Princess, the redhead had been around for too long already.

Another sigh escaped the ethereal figure; red eyes not once leaving the figure that now moved inside the house, welcoming his brothers and laughing along with them.

"Will they be alright?"

A small smile made it to her lips. "You have nothing to worry about, Princess," she simply answered. "They will all be perfectly fine."

Red eyes turned to look at her then, and the Princess smiled. "They'll be happy," she said. "All of them. Right?"

Again, she smiled, nodding her head.

"Watch over them for me," came the soft request.

"Of course," she said, nodding her head.

The princess nodded as well and, looking back one last time, she finally turned to her, smiling. "Alright, then," she said, nodding her head again.

With a flick of her hand, her staff appeared out of nowhere. With one last understanding nod towards the Princess, and returning the smile, she wiggled her staff around, just a little; the Garnet Rod shining brightly and proudly as the ethereal figure faded away.

Letting out a sigh, she took a look around, purely out of habit; she already knew there was no one around. And no one could see her, anyway. Not for now, at least.

Shaking herself, she let out another sigh, before letting her powers fold in. A white, flooding mist engulfed her for a moment, and within seconds, she was standing there, in the middle of her friends' backyard, wearing the white skinny pants, an off the shoulder dip-dyed coral summer sweater and matching coral flats she had been wearing earlier that morning, when she left the house.

Walking in through the sliding doors, she didn't bother on coming up with an excuse; the others were by now used to her 'mysterious ways', and knew better than to ask where she was coming from whenever she didn't show up the traditional, normal way. Although, to her credit, she did make an effort on not showing up in their houses out of the blue, ringing the bell and then using the door instead.

Everyone was already sitting around the large table that had been set up just for the occasion. Ami was holding a happy looking Yoshiko as Minako kept her entertained, making funny faces just for her and making her laugh and giggle happily.

She saw her tall blonde friend taking the sippy cup and filling it with apple juice, and then lovingly handing it to her daughter. And as the giggling girl accepted the offered drink, grabbing it with both hands and drinking soundly to then put the cup in the table, letting out a sigh, a smile made it to her lips.

"Come sit with your favorite uncle," Yaten said, extending his hands out to the baby girl.

And when she happily accepted, throwing her little arms in her uncle's direction, the purple eyed man made a tsk sound. "Don't you think you should let _her_ decide that?" Taiki pointed out. "Besides, everyone knows I'm the favorite uncle," he added, taking a sip from his drink.

"Oh, please!" Yaten exclaimed, rolling his eyes to his brother as he took his niece in his arms. "You'd be the boring one, taking her to museums and reading her stories. I'm the fun one, here."

"Let's not forget who's the one making her feel better when she's ill and then making her smile with a treat," Mamoru put in, as he cut a small piece of cake.

He gave it to Yoshiko, and the girl opened her mouth wide and big, accepting the offered treat. Placing both her hands over her mouth to prevent the cake from falling off -and all over her little aqua green dress-, she munched happily, looking up at the future King with wide, happy green eyes.

"Buying her off with food," Yaten pointed out, shaking his head in disapproval. "Shame on you."

Mamoru shook his shoulder, completely unaffected, and everyone laughed.

"Well, look at that!" Minako exclaimed. "Only one year old, and she already has three men fighting for her heart!" she said, smiling widely and proudly.

"She had them all wrapped around her little finger the moment she was born," Rei stated, nodding her head.

"Specially this one," Haruka added, pointing at her husband with her head.

"Guilty as charged," he admitted, palms up in the air in surrender as a sided, proud smile made it to his lips.

"Yeah, but… imagine what she would be like when she's sixteen!" Minako continued. "She would have men eating out of the palm of her hand!"

"Not if I can help it," Seiya put in, frowning. The smile on his lips said he was joking, though everyone knew, the singer's -and his wife's- overprotective tendencies towards his daughter was something little Yoshiko would have to fight against when growing up.

And as everyone laughed, she smiled. If only they knew…

There would only be five important men in Yoshiko's life -her daddy irrevocably occupying the first place-, all of which she would be related to in some way or another.

She hadn't lied to the Fireball Princess; they were all going to be perfectly fine. Although the future was not set in stone, fate and destiny had a way of always playing their cards. There would be a few detours here and there, she was sure, but certain events were meant to happen, regardless of the particular situations around. And as she looked at the little toddler giggling happily at her father, she knew, that little girl would make her parents scared, proud, angry and thrilled, in many, many different ways.

She was going to grow up to truly be her parents' daughter. She would be strong and fast and very athletic, and would succeed and outstand on every sport and activity she'd landed her green eyes on. She would fall in love with her father's guitar at a young age, and will train and master the art of singing, being the owner of a strong, deep, beautiful voice, just like her daddy. And just like her mother, she would develop a love for speed and adrenaline, particularly for motorcycles; a fact that would give her parents a few headaches, along with more than one 'she's your daughter' accusing line.

She was going to grow up to become a strong, powerful Senshi. The first of her kind, for there would be more. But, true to both her parents and their legacy, she would be the strongest, and their leader. And, just like both her parents, she was going to develop a deep, particularly soft spot for her Princess, though not as soft as her baby brother…

Oh, yes, there was another one coming. And though the siblings' fights and arguments would become legendary, with their pranks and fighting matches being something worthy of seeing -but by no means something anyone in their right mind would want to get in the middle of-, Yoshiko would be a wonderful, very protective big sister.

With short jet black hair, she would be the vivid image of Sailor Star Fighter, but would resemble her mother in everything else; with the same fierce green eyes, she would be strong willed, opinionated, charming, stubborn, self confident, protective, and more than a little cocky -though that was a treat she would inherit from both her parents. Her brother, on the other hand, would be an exact male replica of Haruka, with the only exception of his eyes; with rebel blonde hair, tall and strong, he would be the proud owner of a charming smile and a pair of deep blue eyes that would melt and win over more than just one heart. Set minded but easy going, rash but focused, he would grow up to be just like his father; charming, self confident and flamboyant, but just as capable of being serious, becoming a fast, agile, and deadly dangerous warrior.

Fate and destiny sure loved their funny ways. And, to everyone's surprise and amusement, they would follow right after their parents' steps, and beyond. While he would fall for, and later on court and betroth the future Princess, Yoshiko would only have eyes for the future daughter of one particular violinist. Something both mothers would find rather funny and ironically amusing, to their daughters utter surprise, eternal embarrassment and filled with awkwardness shock when finding out the truth about their mothers' past. The fact that they would grow up as cousins only adding to their awkwardness, which will be, of course, the reason why it will take so long for the teenagers -quite a couple of year in Yoshiko's case, with the object of her affection being two years younger- to act upon their feelings. But with that dealt with, they would be completely devoted to each other, protective, loving, encouraging, and zealous.

But there was a decade, a century, and then a few more years to come before all that. The second little offspring had yet to come, and Yoshiko had a few years of being an only child ahead. And in between then and now, she had a few little adventures and anecdotes to star in first.

Though she could stand up and give a few shaky steps, she had yet to give up the safety of crawling to start walking around instead. And then give her mother more than one heart attack when getting the hand of it too fast too easily, sneaking around in the blink of an eye. She had yet to master the ability of putting on her own swimsuit by herself without mixing up the straps, and cry her little eyes out when falling off her free-of-training-wheels bike for the first time. She had yet to learn how to speak, and then a long road ahead before she would stop calling her uncle 'Aten' -a little kiddy nickname that would melt the lime green eyed man, each and every time.

She had a long way to go before her father would lecture her, telling her it was not ok to get into a fight with other kids, no matter what they called her baby brother. And even longer before she would consider the soldiers in training are in need of some serious lesson, making both her mother and her aunt Makoto angry at her for the end result of broken noses, black eyes and several bruises to which a really long lecture about learning how to keep her temper in check would inevitably follow.

She had yet to do all those things and more. But for now, she was just a little girl, sitting on her uncle's lap and incoherently babbling, not really aware of the fact they were celebrating her very first birthday, but just happy that she was surrounded by the people who loved her.

Green eyes looked at her, as if the little future troublemaker knew she was just thinking about her. Not that that was possible, but still…

Regardless of the future little pranks and a mischief or two, she knew she would never be able to stay mad at her for long. And when Yoshiko gifted her with a wide, happy smile, chubby little hands clutching a beloved teddy to her chest, she knew she was right; that little girl surely knew how to win everyone over with just one smile.

"You're too much like your parents for your own good," she grunted, not completely able to fight off the small smile off her face as she took a spoon and, cutting a small piece of Makoto's work-of-art cake, she offered it to the girl, only for Yoshiko to open her mouth wide and big, eagerly accepting it.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Haruka asked, arching a questioning, slightly offended eyebrow.

"Nothing," she said. "It's between Yoshiko and me," she stated, tenderly poking the girl's pointy little nose and making her giggle.

"Is there something you know and I don't?" the blonde asked.

"You do realize that's a really stupid question, right?" Michiru pointed out.

"Yeah, but, she has a way of saying my daughter's just like me," the blonde started.

"Us," Seiya corrected her.

"And really making it sound like 'she'll be a pain in my ass'," Haruka finished, not paying attention to her husband's correction, and arching a questioning eyebrow her way instead.

She snorted. "Please! She's _your_ daughter, not mine," she reminded her. "I appreciate your concern, but my ass won't be in any kind of pain."

"Should I be worried, here?" Seiya asked, frowning lightly, though he was obviously finding the entire conversation kind of funny.

"You're a father," she simply pointed out. "It's your job to worry," she reasoned.

"And change diapers, and give her a bath," Haruka teased.

"Hey, I do that," he said, raising one long finger. "You _know_ I do."

"And indulge her every whim, being unable to say no to her," the blonde continued, teasingly narrowing her eyes to him.

He shook a shoulder. "I'd probably do that…" he mumbled, admittedly, and then chuckling sheepishly as a general laugh went around the table.

"And over-shelter her, and teach her how to play basketball and ride a bike," the tall woman continued. "We'd probably have an argument over that one, 'cause everyone knows I'm way better than you on that area," she stated, grinning widely when everyone laughed.

"Well, for now," she said to the singer, getting everyone's attention once more, "your only concern should be making sure she won't get chocolate all over her dress," she finished, pointing out at the little girl as she took a piece of cake with her hand, guiding it to her mouth and getting chocolate all over her face.

"Wow!" Yaten exclaimed, taking the girl's hands in his, away from her dress before she could wipe them off in it. "Careful, Yoshi!"

Taking a napkin, Haruka cleaned the girl's hands and face. "Here, baby," she said, tenderly. "Uncle Yaten doesn't know how to take care of you."

"Hey!" the man complained, frowning and clearly offended as everyone just laughed.

Unhappy about being distracted from her cake, Yoshiko whimpered, tossing her face from side to side trying to get away from the cleaning napkin. And then forgot all about it when her mother showed her an only momentarily forgotten beloved teddy and the girl took it, holding it to her chest and nuzzling her cheek against the bear's head, earning herself an echo of Oh's and Ah's going all around the table.

Again, she smiled.

No, she hadn't lied to the Fireball Princess. Just like she hadn't lied to Seiya; as parents, they would both have their fair amount of worrying to do along the way. It was only natural.

It had been quite the rollercoaster, the road that had led them here. But after all the fights, the arguments and disagreements, the pain, the loss, the tears shed, they had finally made it. And there would be more of all that in some way or another; like any other parent, they would make mistakes, and there would be arguments and fights, miscommunications and misunderstandings. But there would also be moments like this one, filled with laughter and jokes and happiness that would make it all worth it.

They would make it through.

And they would go through everything the same way they had done so far; together. Like many times before, and like many more to come, they would find love, happiness and companionship in one another, offering a shoulder to cry on and words of comfort and advice when needed; the two of them, Yoshiko, their friends, and the little ones that had yet to come. All of them, together, like the big, truly unique though maybe a little dysfunctional, happy family they were.

That was, after all, the way of life. Of their life. And this was only the beginning.

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The End

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><p><strong>A.N.:<strong> Ok, folks. This is it! A little extra something I wrote to give an end to this story. Hope you liked it. Thank you all for joining me for the ride!

**Amy Hunt:** I added a little something about the future -in case it wasn't clear, that was from Setsuna's POV-, but I won't be writing about her life. Personally, and not to offend anyone here, I don't really like it when fics go around the Senshi's children; too many OC's, too many names, and way too many stories confuse me and I tend to get… well, bored. I toyed with an idea for a while, but it turned out to be so complicated and long that I just discarded it. Besides, I have other stories I'm currently working on, and ideas for new stories I'd like to get to in the future.  
>Trust me, it's really hard for me to say goodbye to Fiery Tales, but this is it. I swear that fic is my pride and joy, and I'm not sure I made it justice with this sequel, but, hey! At least it was an interesting ride (for me, at least it was!)<p>

**Faia Fire: **I researched a little bit, and then added what I already know. I have a niece, a nephew, my cousin has 2 kids, and a girl from work is pregnant; I know a few things, here ;)


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